by Ivy Knight
"How the fuck, can you even think, that you can neglect a direct order from me?" I look at him with no emotion as he yells at me.
"This was step one of the deal I made with you. Get your men to take over whatever was previously his," I say.
"You don't kill someone as important as him without my permission," his forehead creases in anger. He's outraged at this point, because I'm not replying to him. I don't intend to either.
His tongue clicks just before he grabs onto my biceps pulling me closer to him.
"You work for me, do you understand? I'm your leader, you're not mine. If this happens one more time, I will kill you on the spot. Your punishment for tonight is waiting for you, so get in the car, and wait for me."
He let's go of me and I peel my eyes away from him as I take in the amount of pain his grip inflicted. Talking back to him is only going to piss him off further, so I bite down on the insides of my cheeks as I turn around and walk away. Silently, I climb into the car and wait.
A few minutes later, some members of our gang arrive and Kai instructs them to take the body along with the other men away. As I anxiously wait for him to come to the car, the blood drying on my clothes makes me sick.
All I want to do is rip them off, right here, right now. I feel disgusting. If that man hadn't seen my tattoo, then maybe he wouldn't have died from of my hands. Why did things have to be so complicated all the time? Even now, Kai's taking me for a punishment, not home.
Sometimes I wonder if thing's would have been easier if I had chosen to go back to my father. Then I could've just hid behind his shield as my brothers did all the dirty work.
My thoughts break at the sound of the door opening. Kai climbs in and immediately starts backing out of the location. In seconds, we're driving almost a hundred kilometers per hour.
As time passes by, the drowsier I get. Just when I'm about to pass out, the car comes to a stop. My eyes flutter open and my heart instantly drops.
Kai climbs out and walks around opening my door. He takes a tight grip around my arm and pulls me out. His grip stays as he drags me inside the building.
I hiss under his strong grip, but he doesn't care as he continues to drag me.
My brain is numb as we walk down the hallways and then down a staircase revealing the boxed room I was held captive in for a week.
But, we walk past that room this time. My heart races in panic.
What's something worse than that?
He comes to a stop at the end of the hall and opens the door. Inside, everything is much cleaner and didn't stink as much. When Kai pushes me into a glass cage, I groan.
This one doesn't have a treadmill floor like the other one, so I loosen up. But when I notice that there's no holes in the wall either, questions arise. My eyes trace Kai as his hands lift up to press some button on a panel in the wall.
"Kai, what is this?" I question with a certain force to my tone saying I demand an answer.
He continues pressing buttons before water starts to fill the cage. The ice water rises to my knees and I tremble.
"Kai, there's no holes, are you planning on killing me?" I question as the water keeps rising.
"Nope."
The only barrier between us is the heavy glass. Kai stands watching, as the water makes its way over my shoulders and I float. I find a secure grip at the top and hold myself up to breathe. The water stops when my lips are centimeters away from the top of the glass.
"Is it freezing?" he deadpans.
I let out a dry laugh, "W-why d-don't y-you c-c-come in h-here and ch-check?"
He lets out a laugh. If I turn my head to look at him, I'll be underwater unable to breathe.
"Would you look at that? You're drowning in the same blood you killed tonight."
On cue, the water starts again and I gasp as it leaves no room for me to breathe. I hold my breath and open my eyes. The water is red and a blurry as Kai stands two feet away. my hands rest on the glass for support and steadiness.
Don't think about it, Summer. Remember what Dean taught you; even if you're suffering, you hide it until the other person loses patience and gives in first.
My eyelids clench tighter hoping it helps me forget the need for air I had. Giving up, I breathe in and choke. I hear the ruckus of the machine and look up, I swim up and gasp for air as I cough. The water slowly vanishes and I'm left on my knees spitting out bloody water.
I look at Kai through the tears in my eyes.
"We're not done yet," he says.
A fog of spray leaks through the box.
"It's carbon dioxide if you were wondering," Kai states. The air is pulled away from me again and I try to take slow, measured breathes, as I lean my back against the glass.
I glare at him. The expansion of my lungs is limited, but that doesn't stop them from filling. The carbon dioxide burns my insides. I start to choke when the gas stops and another gas releases. This one makes it easier to breathe.
Once I catch my breath, I ask, "S-so is this the punishment, breath play?"
Kai lets out a laugh, "Call it whatever you want, but after being in here all night with no sleep, you'll learn your lesson."
"All night, my lungs might be fit, but they're not fit enough for this, I'll pass out within an hour."
"But you'll still remember the struggle, and if I were you, I wouldn't pass out. No one's going to be here to save you from this," he says. He turns around to leave.
"You're wrong Kai, a-about me," he stops at my words. The carbon dioxide starts to take over again and I feel myself becoming dizzy.
"Y-you think th-that there's something deeper to my actions a-and the w-words that sometimes escape my lips, b-but no, there isn't. You won't take m-my words seriously, but there's no double meaning behind th-the things I do. I-I'm just committing to my words, that's all. You're the owner of another state because I had it in me to kill a leader," I mix the lie in with the truth to make it believable.
"That's the problem, Summer, you killed a leader. Makes me wonder if you'd do it to me too," with that, he leaves.
Yes, I would do it to you too.
Chapter 23
"I wonder what you did this time," I faintly make out Alec's voice.
My head is heavy on the lack of oxygen. I don't know how long I've been in here and I'm surprised that I'm still conscious. I rip my eyes open and blink several times, until my vision is clear. I spot Alec through the glass, clicking some buttons on the panel.
My whole body feels overweight. Looking down at my arm, it's an odd shade of dark blue. Fear rises within me.
The whole night was torture. I would pass out and wake up wondering if I was still alive. It was like dying over and over again. Every time I thought I was dead, I'd be awake again suffering through the same pain.
The door opens and in he walks. Alec's green eyes roam my body with obvious worry plastered across his face as he crouches down to my level. I try to keep my eyes open, but my lids ate too heavy, closing on me.
"Wh-ha-"
"Don't," Alec stops me from talking. Without a word, he slips one arm under my legs and the other supports my back as he picks me up. I shuffle hiding my head close to the warmth of his chest. As we exit the cage, I feel tears making their way out.
I don't know why I do this to myself. Why I keep everything in and then expect it to never come out. Unfortunately, that never happens. It always comes out and like today, I don't think there's any way of stopping it.
I pull my shoulder over my face ashamed of crying. I've gotten so weak, it's pathetic. Alec lowers down a bit and opens the car door. Gently, he sets me down on the seat. I keep my face hidden. He gets the hint when he backs away closing the door and lets me buckle my own seat belt. I shift my whole body so it's facing the window and away from Alec as he takes a seat.
For a moment, I feel his eyes on me, but when he starts the car, I sigh in relief. Talking is the last thing I want to do.
My clothes are still wet from last night. The whole t
ime I was in there, all I could think about was my life and every person I killed. I used to keep track of every person I chose to kill with my own hands, but I've lost count now. There's been too many killings. It feels like I've went rogue all in excuse of not exposing myself.
Why am I even doing this?
To get some information on Nick. At the end of the day, everyone knows that I could kill Nick in a matter of minutes, but I'm choosing not to. And for that choice, I've been paying with other people's lives.
Will it even be worth it?
"We're home," Alec says.
I don't reply.
"Summer, I know you're awake," he continues. "I know this doesn't help you in any way, but I know what Kai did to you was wrong. You helped him – us. You helped us and he overreacted. You didn't deserve what he put you through."
"Please, cry me a river," I deadpan. He lets out a breath of defeat. A few seconds later, I hear his door open. He walks around the car and then opens my door. His face holds pain that I've never seen before.
"You're doing just great at it yourself," he says as he lifts me bridal style.
I close my eyes and take in his warmth. The heat radiating onto me, makes me realize how much colder my whole body actually is. Sometimes, I wonder how I've become so immune to certain things. If only I was immune to emotions. Then I could fulfill my goals without any setbacks or guilt.
"Lily's going to come over to check on you," Alec mentions as he climbs the stairs.
"Tell her to shove her knowledge up her ass, I'd rather die than get help from the same people who caused the pain," I reply dryly speaking into his chest. Even though my voice is muffled, I'm pretty sure he understood what I said.
"Funny, I thought you'd say that. Why don't you just tell her yourself?" Alec kicks open a door.
"Put her on the bed," I hear Lily's voice and groan.
Alec sets me down, and I sit up onto my bed with the support of my headboard. Lily stands next to me with concern lacing her hazel eyes.
"Touch me and I'll kill you. If you're really determined to help me, start by knocking some humanity into Kai fucking Black, thank you very much," I say with gritted teeth.
"Summer, please don't be stubborn. Your eyes are beet red and your face is deadly pale. Look at your arms, they're blue. Just, please let me do a routine checkup," Lily begs sincerely.
"I said no."
Lily looks at Alec for help.
"Summer, just do it. It's Kai's order for you to get checked," Alec pulls out a low card.
"Get out," I glare.
"Summer -"
"No! Get the fuck out of my room!" Lily jolts back in surprise. I climb out of my bed and stare at them with pure hatred.
"We're just here to help you," Lily states.
"I don't need your help, I need you to leave," both of them contemplate on what to do. "Leave!"
"Hey," Alec takes two large strides over to me.
"No! Don't touch me," I move back holding my hands out in front of me. The tears rush down my face.
"You're not alone, Summer. I know I'm a part of all this, but I'm just trying to help you."
"You can't help me, Alec. I was ruined way before Kai showed up, so no, I don't want your help or hers. I want you to leave me alone, because after everything I've been put through for the last three weeks, I think I've earned that much for myself."
"Lily, I'm sorry for calling you," Alec says. Lily sighs as she takes one last glance towards me. I hide my gaze and wait for her to leave.
"You too," I add once she leaves.
"No," Alec says. I huff walking to the bathroom. As I close the door, Alec inserts one foot in between, stopping the door from fully closing.
"I'm not leaving you alone," he states.
"I'm fine, Alec."
"I have a girlfriend and a sister, I know what 'I'm fine' actually means," he retorts.
I take a seat on the edge of my tub and run my hand through my hair. I look up at the light trying to dry out my eyes.
"What do you want me to do, Alec? Kai did what he wanted to and no one has the ability to take back the pain I was in for the last twelve hours."
"I know, and I don't want you to do anything except talk. You're different than your typical seventeen-year-old, no doubt about it, but at the end of the day, you're still human – a teenage girl. No matter how much you try to neglect that, you can't, and like every other girl out there, you have emotions. The more you keep them bottled up, the worse they get."
"Are you a part time therapist or something? Because that's the only logical reason I see for you to be doing this."
He laughs.
"No, but I'll tell you one thing. My sister was kidnapped during a mission and went through something like Kai's putting you through. At that time, I didn't know how to help her and she fell off the railings. I can't stop Kai from doing what he does, but I can help you heal from it. I'm just trying to help you."
I wipe away my tears. This man is so unique. I've never met anyone in this industry as genuine as him, and if it's just an act, then it's a darn good one. Before I can reply, heavy steps take over the silence. In a few seconds, I hear my room's door bust open.
Alec faces the bathroom door just as Kai walks in looking furious. Noticing his anger, Alec stops Kai before he can get to me.
"Who, calm down man. What's wrong?"
"Get out of my way," Kai demands.
"No," Alec replies firmly.
"Stop, Alec," I instruct. "Let him through."
Alec's head turns around looking at me. My head bobs letting him know I want him to let Kai through. With a step to the side, Kai gets a clear route to me.
I stand up as he approaches me.
"What the fuck did you tell Lily?"
His hot breath fans my face.
My mind clogs with the smell of his cologne.
Why does he always have to wear it?
My eyes slowly make their way up to his. Right now, his eyes are in their natural colour a transparent gray.
"That she wasn't allowed to touch me," I answer.
"She's a doctor and she had full permission to do a routine checkup on you," Kai responds.
"By who? Because I don't remember telling her so."
"Me."
"Under what authority? The last thing I remember is you're the one who left me in there," I state angrily. The tears are coming, and I don't hold them back. "I'm not a puzzle for you to break and put together every time you get bored. That's not my problem, that's yours."
He clenches his jaw. From the roots of his pupil, his iris starts to fade into a darker shade, reflecting his anger.
I take a step closer, leaving only inches between our faces.
"I'm done with this, with you, Kai and if you can, try to stop me."
I pull the shoulder of my jacket on and take a step around Kai. Alec stands there watching me as I pass him through the door. With my head up high, I walk out of my room and out, towards the main door.
Kai won't let me go. He is going to stop me, but let's see how long he waits until he does. I'm pretty sure he thinks I won't do it, but I will and maybe that'll be for the best. If he let's me go today, then I'll make sure I'll be out forever.
I'm in the middle of the lounge when I hear Kai and Alec grunt. My feet glue to their spot as I listen to Alec speak.
"Bro, let her go, or let her in."
Everything inside of me, tells me to turn around and laugh at Kai. The people he gave a life to are gradually starting to turn against him for me. Though, I know better, so I continue to walk out. One step away from the door, and Kai speaks.
"Stay, and you have my word. You will not be treated poorly by me or anyone belonging to this gang unless there is a completely valid reason."
I sigh, part of me had wished that Kai didn't stop me.
"Do I have a choice?"
"Yes," with that, I hear his footsteps distance. For the first time, I'm given a choice. A decision I get to make all for mys
elf.
"Why'd you stop him?" I question knowing Alec is still there.
"Sometimes he gets lost and he needs help making the right decision."
"You think keeping me here will help you?"
"No, I think your abilities will help us. What you choose to do with them, is up to," he says. "You have a decision to make."
I close my eyes and imagine all the different ways this one decision could lead to. If I walk away today, I can move out of this state and eventually out of this country. I could find a man good enough for me and start a family. But if I stay, I can kill the system from the inside and save millions of lives. My world kills so many people, it's ridiculous.
"I'll stay," I turn around facing Alec. His head bobs respecting my decision.
He takes a few steps towards me lends out his hand with a smirk displayed on his face.
"Welcome to the team, Summer White. We're glad to have you."
"So am I," I grin.
Starting today, my plan can only move up from here.
Chapter 24
Darkness is inevitable. In everyone's life, no matter what religion, profession or gender you are, there comes a time where you give into the darkness. Reason's aren't needed when you're over the edge – as some like to describe the dark side. But even then, there's certain levels of darkness people are devoured in.
I try to open my eyes, but my lashes are stuck on the cotton cloth tightly tied over them. My first instinct is to pull the rag off, but the sandy ropes securing my wrists to the arms of the chair, that's not even an option. The next thing that comes to mind are my legs, but they've been tied to the legs of the chair keeping me in one place.
My physical tactics are useless at this point, so I try to remember.
My birthday is today, or maybe it was a few days ago depending on how long I've been kidnapped for. All my friends and family were waiting for me. Calling and texting me to come to the party already. I was the birthday girl, yet the only person not at the party, because I was stuck waiting for Vincent, my oldest brother.
He always does that – takes every opportunity he gets to snatch happy moments away from my life. I can't believe dad left him in charge of me on such a meaningful day. He knows how much I despise Vince.
