by Ivy Knight
Just get it over with.
I let out a deep sigh, and raise my head.
"What do you need for you to stop?"
"Stop having sex?" I question.
"For you to be more active within the family. For you to be present."
"I'm here, Alessio. I'm here throughout the whole day trying to please everyone in this house but I'm not here at night."
"You haven't been training for the last two weeks," he accuses.
"Because it's not like those skills are being put to good use. I stay at home while everyone else goes and fights."
"That's how it works, Summer. You have people working for you. You should be relieved."
"No, Alessio, I wasn't raised like that. I – you know what? I don't have time for this. I have to get ready for the run," I start to walk towards the bathroom, but Alessio stops me.
"You look like you haven't slept all night. You've taken two weeks off, another day won't matter."
I sigh heavily and turn to face him.
"I am trying, Alex. I promise you, but I can't give you what you want. I can't bring myself to give myself to you because you want something with boundaries and rules. What I need is something reckless."
"Summer," I feel the coldness in his tone. "I can give you anything. All you have to do is ask."
I look at him in surprise. Slowly, he starts to close the distance between us.
"Alex, I-" the words are caught in my throat as my back hits the wall. Both his hands cage me, resting on the wall behind. His eyes full of lust, they drop down to my lips. Flicking back up, a smirk grows on his lips as he sees me flustered.
His head leaning in, his hot breath trails down my neck as he lands a small kiss.
"Elenora."
"Kai," Alessio retorts.
"Alex, we-"
"Are about to get married. Just tell me what you want, Summer," he demands. His right-hand lifts off the wall squeezing my waist.
His lips lingering over the skin of my neck, I feel the goosebumps rising all over my body.
"I want you, Alex," I moan as he starts to trail small kisses from my neck down to my collarbone.
"Okay," he smirks against my skin.
"Fuck," I moan as his hands roam around my body and his lips start to suck hard on the surface of my neck.
"Summer?" I hear Anthony's voice outside our door.
"Anthony, go away!" I yell as Alessio starts to unbutton my shirt.
"You need to get back on schedule. I can't give you anymore leeway."
My eyes closed, I hold back the loud moans trying to escape my lips as Alessio makes his way down south.
"Fuck," I fist my hands at my sides as Alessio pulls down my jeans and I feel his breath hovering over my spot.
"Summer," I hear the doorknob twist.
"Fuck, Anthony, leave! I'm having sex with my fiancé!"
I hear Alex snicker at my words and hear the door close.
No more Anthony.
"Where were we?" Alessio stands up facing me.
"Here," I curl my arms around his neck and start kissing him. His arms, in return wrap, around my waist picking me up.
In my mind, I want to find more in the kiss - in the sex, but I don't. I feel nothing more than the pleasure of being fucked. I wish there was more, so I that I know I haven't made the mistake of misplacing my heart. But, maybe I have.
And maybe that's why I've been seeing Donte and now, Alessio. I need to be reminded that my heart can't give me the same pleasure anyone else can or that is just what I'm telling myself to feel less guilty of everything I'm doing.
...♛...
"Okay, the number you're looking at on the slips that you all just picked out, is the same number as another one of you is carrying. Find your partners, and I'll let you in on the rest."
"Two," I announce.
"Me too," Cole says making his way over to me.
After a few minutes, everyone is partnered up and waiting for the rest of the instructions.
"So, we'll be doing a small tournament. There are six groups. The person standing next to you, will be your first opponent and the winner between the two of you will go on to fight against another winner until there is only one winner standing. The winner of the tournament, will get one request that will be fulfilled without question or hesitation, whatever it may be," Anthony explains. "All of you have fifteen minutes to warm up. I'll explain the rules once we start."
"Well, good luck, Cole," I shake his hand before walking towards the lockers.
Unlocking mine, I pull out my bag to change into more comfortable clothing.
"Okay, bringing Graham, Felix, Lane and Calliste into this tournament is a disadvantage for us. They're more experienced and bigger," Amelia rants as she opens her own locker.
"Beating them will make it just as much fun."
My reply takes them by surprise and both Amelia and Dakota stand there without saying a word.
"Now you decide you wanna talk to us?" Dakota retorts.
"I know I should've been more open with you guys and I'm sorry. I promise I'm trying to be better at it now," I stand up.
"A month, Summer. It took you a month to realize that, but it's okay. I guess we can let it slide just this once," Amelia considers.
"Thank you," I sigh heavily hugging both of them. "I missed you."
"We did too," both of them speak in unison.
"Five more minutes!" Anthony yells.
Stepping back, I give them a small smile before we start changing. I take off my shirt and sweats before slipping on a pair of shorts over my spandex.
"So that's why Anthony looked like he had been scarred for life this morning," Amelia mumbles looking at my chest and neck.
"Oh, grow up. It's a part of life. These are just hickeys. If I were pregnant, no one would be bashing me then," I huff.
"Oh, my God... that's actually so true," Amelia mumbles.
"Okay guys, come around the ring!"
"Let's go," Dakota says. I quickly close my bag and shove it into my locker before we head over.
"Okay, so the names have been listed on the projector right there," Anthony points to the screen behind us. "Kai and Alec are the first ones up. The rules are quite simple, you fight until one of you can no longer keep fighting."
With that, Anthony steps out of the ring while Kai and Alec take up two of the corners opposite from each other.
"You're going up second," Amelia acknowledges.
"I am," I shrug. I turn my attention back to the ring and spot Kai taking off his shirt just before the opening of the door catches my attention. My head turns around to find Alessio walking in.
Standing by the door, dressed in one of his many suits, his eyes scan the room before falling on me. I flash him a confused look as I make my way to him.
"What are you doing here?"
"I just dropped my father off at the airport and thought I'd see what you guys are doing in here."
"Wasn't he supposed to be here for three more days?"
"Uh- yes, but some things came up and he had to leave as soon as possible."
"I see. What about you?"
"What about me?" his eyebrows furrow.
"Well, it's only late April and the wedding isn't until the end of June. Are you planning on ditching me before then or staying?"
"I'm not planning to leave anytime soon, but anything can happen. Though," he takes a hold of my hand and pulls me into him wrapping his arms around me. "I'm pretty sure I have plenty of time to cover your whole body in more love bites before I go anywhere."
"If this is your way of saying good luck, it sucks. I need to be focused, not distracted," I frown childishly.
"Then let me give you an incentive. If you win, I'll do whatever you ask of me, but if you lose, then I'll be in control for the night," he smirks.
"Kai wins!" I hear Anthony's voice boom loudly. "Next up are Cole and Summer."
"Looks like you're up," Alessio says.
"You're
not staying to watch?"
"No, some of my colleagues are in town and wanted to go out for some drinks."
"Okay," I bob my head.
"Good luck," he pecks my lips.
"Thanks," I smile back. His arms unwrap, letting me go and I turn around walking into the ring. I take the water bottle from Dakota's hand and drink some as I watch Alessio leave.
"Good luck," Dakota says as I hand her put back the water bottle down.
"Okay, Summer. All jewelry off?" Anthony asks. I extend my arms as he feels them down and nods. "The anklet."
I look down and see the elephant anklet he's referring to.
"Can I tuck it into my sock instead?" I question.
"Sure," Anthony permits. As I kneel down to tuck my anklet in, my eyes flash up at Cole who's staring at the anklet.
He knows.
"Okay, you guys know the rules. If the other person is down, know when to stop. We're not here to kill," Anthony warns.
Cole and I both nod giving Anthony the signal to exit the ring.
"Where'd you get the anklet?" Cole queries as both our arms go up in defense.
"A while ago, why?"
"Alice had the same one," he words. This is the first time I've heard her name out loud for a while and him being the one to say it, ignites a fire within me fueled with anger.
I notice his right foot step slightly forward which gives me just enough time to dodge his right fist. Simultaneously, I lift my left leg hitting him in the abdomen.
Distracted by my blow, I creep in and go to punch him in the temple but his arm blocks my fist while his fists hits me in the collarbone.
"Fuck," I breathe out stepping back. When I look back up, I see his fist coming in and I block it just in time, but it still causes me to take a few steps back.
"This is hers," I breathe trying to distract Cole.
His eyebrows knit in confusion.
"But-"
"I know she's alive," I whisper.
"She's dead," Cole replies coldly. "The night you thought Alice was a part of the shipment, she was. I took her out of the truck on the way to the warehouse, and when I got back to where I left her, I found her dead with her wrists bleeding out."
My hands still up in defense, it takes a few seconds for his words to register in my mind.
"She's dead?"
"Kai said he told you."
"No, he..." I put my hands down and immediately bring them back up rapidly hitting Cole with all the force I can. I hit like he's lifeless and he lets me. He lets me hit him until he falls to the ground and I tower over him.
His eyes swollen, there's blood all over his face. Breathing heavily, I look around at the people surrounding the ring astonished at how effortlessly Cole lost.
In all those faces, I don't see the one I want to, so I exit the ring and walk into the guys' change room. The shower running, I walk over to find Kai under the faucet, letting the steaming water ease the forming bruises on his body.
"She's dead?" I ask turning him around.
"Who's dead?" he questions calmly opening his eyes.
"Alice," I move in closer to him allowing the water to drench me as I wait for his answer.
"I told you she's dead a long time ago. Why is it a surprise now?" he asks coldly. There's no hesitation or regret in his voice. "Is it because now you finally know that it wasn't me who killed her. That she took her own life?"
"It was because of you, Kai," I speak as the water heavies my eyelashes blinding my vision.
"Whatever lets you sleep at night," he words. He takes a step forward meeting my eyes just before turning around and forgetting that I'm even present.
Kneeling down, I unhook the anklet and drop it on the ground. If it weren't for the water running down my face, my tears would be in full display.
The person I'd been fighting for, hasn't been with me this whole time. The hope of her being alive was pushing me forward and now all I have left to hold onto, is the hope of defeating Nick.
But what happens after that?
What happens after Nick is defeated?
Chapter 53
Turning on the shower, I let the water run as I undress. My sports bra soaked with sweat and splotches of blood, I throw it to the side with the rest of the clothes I take off.
Stripped down to the last piece of clothing, I enter the shower slowly by letting the steaming water soak my feet first. As I take small steps closer to the water, I breathe heavier. The water cleansing my wounds, burns. I soon forget the pain and stand still under the water as it runs down from my head and travels down my body in streams.
Closing my eyes, the moment that just happened minutes ago replay in my mind.
I remember Kai lying on the floor of the ring. His face bloodied and his chest hardly inflating with air. His eyes barley opened, but I could still see a glint of prosper in his eyes taunting my win.
He wanted me to win and so I did, and I have no doubt that if he had tried any harder than he faked to, he would have won.
I know why he did it. He knew what I'd ask for if I won. I asked to be let back onto missions and like Anthony promised, that request of mine will be fulfilled.
But why would Kai be arrogant enough to lose? If he had won, he could've asked for anything. He could have asked for Luciano or even an out, but he didn't.
Why?
Does he have his own agenda that I should be worried about? What if he's aware of something he shouldn't be? What if he's working with Nick?
"Summer," Alessio fiddles with the doorknob.
"Alex?" I question.
"Summer, open the do-or! I need- I need t-to talk to you," Alex slurs continuing to fiddle with the doorknob.
"Are you drunk?" I question turning off the running water. I grab the towel and quickly dry myself off before securing it tightly around my body.
I unlock the door, and the stench of alcohol blows through the door along with Alessio who I barely catch in my arms.
"Alex!" I shriek holding him up. "Fuck. What did you do, drink the whole fucking bar?"
"No, I'm sorry. I'm sooo sorry," he tries to stand up, but needs to lean on me for support.
"What? Just, okay. Let me get you to bed and we'll talk there, okay?"
"Okay," his eyes drop as I pull his arm around the back of my shoulders and help him to the bed.
I get him to sit down and take a step back. Adjusting my towel higher, I watch as his head drops down tiredly and shoots right back.
"I'm okay! Not drunk!" he tries to stand up, but I push him back down.
"Okay there big guy, I know you're not drunk, but it's time for bed," I start to unbutton his coat. Once his coat is off, I decide to take his shirt off as well, because he usually never sleeps with it on.
As my hands work their way down on each button, halfway down, a drop of water settles down on my hand and I look up. Alex's eyes tinted red, drip with tears.
"Alessio, what's wrong?" I swallow hard pulling my hand away from his shirt and giving him my full attention. I've never seen him so vulnerable and for the first time in forever, my first instinct isn't to figure out a way to use this to my advantage but to help him through it.
"I'm so sorry, Summer. I -I love Elenora and what happened this morning, I-I was mad and confused and I'm so sorry," he apologies. "We - we both love someone else, and if I- I feel this guilty I c-can only imagine you."
Without saying a word, I engulf him into a tight hug. I close my eyes and for a second, just take in how grateful I am to have him as a friend. No one has ever sincerely apologized for hurting me and what he did was nothing compared to what others have done.
"It's okay, Alessio. I'm okay, and so is Elenora."
"Sh - she's never gonna forgive me for what I've done."
"Alex, please. She'll understand, what you did – what we're doing, we have to do it."
"She's never gonna forgive me," his eyes fill with tears as he leans back into the bed bringing his legs in under the sheets and cuddlin
g under them.
"Alex," I sigh staring at the sheets. In response, all I get are small sniffles.
I destroy what I touch.
Every. Single. Fucking. Time.
Feeling the emotions dense inside of me, I turn around deciding to change into a long, oversized hoodie before I head to my mother's grave.
The night is cold and full of fog. I silently take a seat in front of her grave pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.
Taking one out, I light the end and put the box down on the side along with the lighter. For a brief second, my eyes run between my mother's grave making me wander what she'd be thinking right now and to the cigarette in my hand. In the end, my lips wrap around the end of the stick allowing my lungs to inhale the relieving poison.
Breathing out the cloud of smoke, I think of nothing yet everything and feel my eyes soak, drenching themselves with tears of guilt, displeasure and sorrow. I sit on the wet grass, letting the sharp wind ride around the rough edges of my skin. I breathe silently as possible, as if I'm scared to be found by the wave of emotion that's yet to come.
"So this is where you go when you disappear. Here I thought you were plotting something behind our backs," I hear Kai's voice echo from behind me.
I don't move. I sit still hoping that if I don't do anything, that he'll go away. Instead, his voice comes along with the structure of his body which gradually reveals itself through the fog. Dressed in a black hoodie and black sweats, I watch as he limps his way towards me.
The closer he gets, the more I notice. The cut on his eyebrow has been stitched, but seems like it'll leave another scar on his face. His left eye hardly opens; though, the swelling has reduced since this morning and his face is full of bruises reflecting the moon's shine.
"Kai, please go away," I whisper. A part of me hopes that my voice is just high enough to hear, but not high enough to sense the desperation.
When he remains there, I become agitated.
"What do you want?" I sigh heavily. I drop the cigarette and stand up stepping on it before I face Kai.
The second his eyes notice the tears on my face, he takes the smallest step back dropping his head and clearing his throat. I watch curiously as I wait for his head to lift and meet my gaze.
