New Uses For Old Boyfriends
Page 1
Praise for Beth Kendrick’s Novels
Cure for the Common Breakup
“Beth Kendrick has reminded me once again exactly why I love her books so much. Cure for the Common Breakup is packed with humor, wit, and a lot of heart. A charming and exceptionally entertaining story! I can’t recommend this book highly enough.”
—Jane Porter, national bestselling author of The Good Wife
“Beth Kendrick has written a sharp, sassy, surprisingly emotional story that will make readers laugh out loud from page one and sigh from the heart at the end. Light and lovely perfection!”
—Roxanne St. Claire, New York Times bestselling author of the Barefoot Bay series
“Kendrick’s impeccable sense of comic timing and flair for creating unforgettable characters make this effervescent novel a smart bet for romance readers everywhere, while the novel’s deft integration of the topics of family, friendship, and community ensure it can easily attract a broader readership as well.
—Booklist (starred review)
“Utterly delightful! Summer Benson will charm and disarm her way into the hearts of readers as easily as she does the residents of Black Dog Bay.”
—Meg Donohue, USA Today bestselling author of All the Summer Girls
The Week Before the Wedding
“Kendrick proves she is the leader of the pack when it comes to fashioning cheekily clever love stories, and her latest will delight readers with its delectably acerbic wit and charmingly complex characters.”
—Booklist (starred review)
“In an engaging story about matters of the heart, Kendrick perfectly captures the struggle between who we really are and who we want to be. With its endearing characters and page-turning plot, this novel balances humor and emotion in a way that begs it to be read in one sitting.”
—RT Book Reviews (41/2 stars)
“A delightful romp with depth.”
—Heroes and Heartbreakers
The Lucky Dog Matchmaking Service
“Graced with a stellar cast of captivating characters (including an adorable pack of scene-stealing canines) and written with both sharp wit and genuine wisdom, Kendrick’s latest effervescent novel is a hopelessly, hopefully romantic treat.”
—Booklist (starred review)
“If the title does not grab your attention, Kendrick’s writing will . . . an engaging, thoroughly enjoyable tale of finding soul mates of the four-legged and two-legged varieties. . . . When you put this book down, you will have a smile on your face and warmth in your heart.”
—RT Book Reviews (41/2 stars)
“Kendrick not only shines in portraying the subtleties of female friendships but also at rendering the unbreakable bond between man (or woman) and dog. . . . Kendrick has a . . . talent for matchmaking: pairing her winsome heroine and her delightful group of canines in the service of a tale of nurturing one’s true calling and rekindling relationships.”
—Publishers Weekly
“If you like dog stories, romance, a little kick to the characters, and a story with a happy ending, try this book. . . . A funny, pleasant story . . . [it] makes one want to go and seek out other Beth Kendrick books.”
—Deseret News (Salt Lake City, UT)
The Bake-Off
“With her usual literary flair, Kendrick delivers a scrumptious literary confection expertly spiced with humor and seasoned with just the right dash of romance.”
—Chicago Tribune
“A warm, winning story about the complications of sisterhood—and the unexpected rewards.”
—Sarah Pekkanen, author of Skipping a Beat
“A sweet, fun, and entertaining look at family, love, and the perfect pastry. . . . Fans of women’s fiction, foodie fiction, and novels about sisters will delight in Kendrick’s descriptions, vivid characters, and fast-paced, hilarious dialogue. A book that often had me laughing aloud—and wiping away a tear at points.”
—Write Meg!
“I absolutely loved this book. It is laugh-out-loud funny and you can’t help but love both sisters. Don’t be surprised if you want to try out the yummy-sounding recipes the author includes.”
—Chicklit Club
“This story is sweet like a great dessert—just the right amount of sugar and spice. It’s a story that celebrates both sisters and the therapeutic benefits of baking.”
—News and Sentinel (Parkersburg, WV)
“Wonderful! Kendrick manages to cook up a tender, touching, and very funny story about the complicated relationship of two sisters torn apart by their own stubbornness and brought back together by love and pastry. With a fresh plot and richly layered characters, The Bake-Off is a winner.”
—Ellen Meister, author of The Other Life
Second Time Around
“Kendrick deftly blends exceptionally clever writing, subtly nuanced characters, and a generous dash of romance into a flawlessly written story about the importance of female friendships and second chances.”
—Chicago Tribune
“A funny, charming story about the power of female friendship, and a must-read for all English majors, past and present.”
—Kim Gruenenfelder, author of Wedding Fever
The Pre-nup
“Witty, juicy, and lots of fun! Say ‘I do’ to The Pre-nup.”
—Susan Mallery, New York Times bestselling author of Only His
“A smart, funny spin on happily ever after!”
—Beth Harbison, New York Times bestselling author of Always Something There to Remind Me
“In the exceptionally entertaining and wonderfully original The Pre-nup, Kendrick writes with a wicked sense of humor and great wisdom about the power of friendship, the importance of true love, and the very real satisfaction of romantic revenge done right.”
—Chicago Tribune
Also by Beth Kendrick
Cure for the Common Breakup
The Week Before the Wedding
The Lucky Dog Matchmaking Service
The Bake-Off
Second Time Around
The Pre-nup
Nearlyweds
Fashionably Late
Exes and Ohs
My Favorite Mistake
New American Library
Published by the Penguin Group
Penguin Group (USA) LLC, 375 Hudson Street,
New York, New York 10014
USA | Canada | UK | Ireland | Australia | New Zealand | India | South Africa | China
penguin.com
A Penguin Random House Company
First published by New American Library,
a division of Penguin Group (USA) LLC
Copyright © Beth Lavin, 2015
Readers Guide copyright © Penguin Group (USA) LLC, 2015
Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.
REGISTERED TRADEMARK—MARCA REGISTRADA
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA:
Kendrick, Beth.
New uses for old boyfriends / Beth Kendrick.
pages cm
ISBN 978-1-101-63599-5
1. Single women—Fiction. 2. Man-woman relationships—Fiction. I. Title.
&
nbsp; PS3611.E535N49 2015
813'.6—dc23 2014028502
PUBLISHER’S NOTE
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Version_1
Contents
Praise
Also by Beth Kendrick
Title page
Copyright page
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Readers Guide
Excerpt from Cure for the Common Breakup
About the Author
For my mother,
who believes that I can do anything . . .
and makes me believe it, too.
acknowledgments
Thank you to . . .
Robert, Jen, and the “couture curators” at Fashion by Robert Black in Scottsdale, Arizona. Your knowledge and passion for timeless style breathed life into this story.
Marcia Pierce at Sew Creative, who told me all about dress design, repair, and the power of perspective.
Janine and Whitney Yates, who shared wit and wisdom about the realities of real estate.
Barbara Ankrum, Kresley Cole, Marty Etchart, Amy and Jason Serin, and Chandra Years. You are living proof that the world is full of love, magic, and second chances.
chapter 1
The last thing Lila did on her way out of town was sell her wedding rings.
When she arrived at the pawnshop, she looked flawless—she’d made sure of that before she left her custom-built brick house for the last time. Her honey blond hair was freshly straightened, her nails impeccably manicured, her blush and mascara tastefully applied. Her blouse matched her skirt, her shoes matched her handbag, and her bra matched her panties because, as her mother had always reminded her, if a terrible accident should ever befall her in a grocery store parking lot, she would be on display to a whole team of paramedics and hospital workers.
But as she pulled her diamond rings out of her purse, all Lila could think about were the things that didn’t look right. The dark roots that were starting to show where her hair parted. The visible tension in her face from months of clenching her jaw at night. The pale stripe on her finger where her rings had been. And even worse than the flaws she couldn’t hide were the ones she could. Out in the parking lot, her white luxury SUV awaited. Spotless and brand-new and jam-packed with the last remnants of her life she’d managed to salvage from the divorce.
For a solid two minutes, Lila kept her hands in the pockets of her stylish rose pink trench coat and listened to soft jazz on the sound system while the store employee scrutinized every facet of the diamonds. Beneath the glass display case, rows of rings sparkled in the light, each one representing a promise exchanged by two people coming together in trust and faith and hope. Lila tried to imagine the men who had proposed with these rings: rich and poor, old and young, each of them in love with a woman they believed to be as unique and dazzling as these jewels.
And they had all ended up here: the relationship boneyard. An “estate jewelry” storefront sandwiched between a dry cleaner and a pet groomer in a suburban strip mall.
The clerk finally looked up, clicking her tongue. “The setting’s very dated, but the stone itself is decent.”
Lila blinked. “Dated? Decent? That ring was on the back cover of Elle magazine the month I got engaged.”
“And how long ago was that?”
“Well. Seven years.” Lila squinted to read the employee’s name tag and tried a different approach. “Norma. I appreciate that you have a business to run and a family to support, but look at the cut and color of this diamond! The stone was imported from Antwerp, the setting is really quite classic—”
“If I’ve learned one thing in this business, it’s that everything goes out of style eventually.” The saleswoman lowered her loupe and tilted her head, her gaze shrewd. “The whole ‘timeless classic’ line? It’s a marketing myth.”
“But the cut.” Lila cleared her throat. “It’s exquisite.”
Norma lifted one corner of her mouth. “Do you happen to have the GIA certification papers?”
“Not anymore.” Lila knew she was being assessed for weakness. How desperate was she for cash? How much did she value this touchstone of her past?
What was the bare minimum she would accept?
She should lift her chin and meet the other woman’s gaze, but she couldn’t. She’d been completely depleted—of confidence, of certainty, of the will to stand up for herself.
“We can sell the diamond, but the setting will have to be melted down and refashioned.” Norma put on her glasses, picked up her pen, and wrote a few numbers down on the pad in front of her. “Here’s what I can offer you.”
Lila glanced down at the figure and swallowed back a sigh.
“I know it’s probably not what you were hoping for, but the fact is, diamonds just don’t hold their value.” Norma’s tone was both apologetic and insincere.
“But that’s less than a third of what my husband paid for it.” Lila hated how tentative and soft she sounded. Then she corrected herself. “My ex-husband, I mean.” She flattened her palm on the cool glass case and tried to rally as she stared at the number written on the pad.
You can do this.
She knew better than to accept an opening offer. She needed to negotiate.
You have to do this.
But she glanced up at the jeweler through lowered eyelashes, her eyes watering and her lip trembling. All the fight had been drained out of her. The spark inside had flickered out.
“I . . .” Lila trailed off, cleared her throat, forced herself to start again. “I’ll take it.” The amount wasn’t enough to save her, but she needed every bit of cash she could get right now. So she let go of all her old hopes and dreams and prepared to take the money.
Norma half smiled, half sneered. “Let me write you a check.”
An electronic chime sounded as the shop’s door opened; then a shrill feminine voice rang out. “Holy crap! You’re Lila McCune. I love you! I’m your biggest fan. Marilyn Waters.” A short, windblown woman in a green turtleneck shook Lila’s hand, squeezing tightly. “I can’t believe this! Do you live around here?”
“Until recently.” Like this morning.
Marilyn turned to the jeweler and demanded, “Did you know she’s a celebrity?”
Norma’s sneer got a little sneerier. “No.”
Lila bowed her head. “Oh, I’m not really—”
“She was the late-night host of my favorite shopping channel for three years.” Marilyn turned back to Lila. “You probably don’t recognize my voice, but we’ve spoken on the air. I called in a few times, and you were so nice. You made me feel good about myself when I was fat and hormonal and losing my damn mind.”
Lila was beaming as she struggled to reclaim her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you in person—I love connecting with callers. What were some of your favorite items?”
“Oh, Lord, I bought so many things. When I was up with my first baby, I watched you every single night. I was exhausted and healing from a third-degree tear, but your show was really soothing. This woman can sell anything to anyone,” Marilyn informed the jeweler. “Crystal Christmas tree ornaments and fancy French sauté pans and this amazing cream that gets rid of the calluses on your heels. Works like magic. Would it be okay if I take a quick picture with you?”
“Of course.” Lila summoned her cheeriest, camera-ready smile.
“One more, just in case.” Marilyn clicked her camera phone three times in rapid succession. “I can’t wait to put this up on Instagram! My sisters are going to be so jealous.”
While Marilyn fiddled with her phone, Lila sidled over to Norma and murmured, “Make the check out to Lila Alders, please. A-L-D-E-R-S.”
Norma raised one finely penciled brow. “I thought you were Lila McCune?”
“I was. Now I’m back to my maiden name.”
Marilyn clicked off social media and rejoined the conversation. “So, what happened, Lila? You’re not on the air anymore.”
“My contract was up, and, um, my agent and I decided it was time to transition.” Lila’s jaw ached. “I’m exploring some new opportunities.”
“Ooh! Like what?”
“Like . . .” Lila had never been so happy to hear her phone ring. “Would you please excuse me for a moment? I have to take this.” She pressed the phone to her ear and walked toward the front window. “Hi, Mom.”
“Where are you right now?” her mother demanded.
“I’m at the engagement ring boneyard.”
“The where?”
“I’m selling my rings.”
Her mother made a little sound of disappointment. “So you won’t be here for dinner?”
“No. Sorry I’m running late; it took me forever to pack up the car and then I had to drop by my attorney’s office to pay off my balance.”