“Weirdo.”
“Text me.”
“Fine.” Sara smiled as she left their house. Her love life was in turmoil, but at least she had friends. There was always that.
****
Sara didn’t get much sleep that night. Her thoughts remained on Terry and whether or not she should talk to her again. Their chat didn’t give her any closure. In fact, it made things worse. That Terry couldn’t trust her hurt Sara. Clearly, Sara didn’t know Terry as well as she thought she did.
She settled at her desk the next day and opened the container of lasagna from Grace. It smelled heavenly, but Sara’s stomach was at odds with her about eating. Yesterday, she skipped breakfast and only ate a few bites of the lasagna for dinner. She poked and prodded the food with her fork. She stopped when her cell phone buzzed with a new text message from Bren. A string of smiley faces followed by a dozen red roses and two pink hearts. No words, just the silly emojis. She couldn’t stop the grin that covered her face.
She sent back two giant smiley faces.
Want to hang out tonight?
Sara didn’t have to think about that at all. Not after the shitty few days she’d had. Yep. Should be home around sixish. Come over?
Be there. Chinese takeout?
Hell yes.
Later!!!
Her last text was followed by more goofy emojis.
Sara dug into her lunch, happy to have someone like Bren to brighten her day, as always, right when she needed her to. Funny how a few little emojis brought her appetite back.
Maybe the sad faerie would leave her alone after all.
****
The takeout was delicious, and Sara patted her very full belly with a sigh. “I know I’ll want more in a couple of hours. Thanks for getting extra.”
Bren smiled, clearly proud of herself. “No problem. I’ll want some, too. You know, I never believed that whole thing about being hungry after eating Chinese food until you talked me into getting some. There’s so much of it. I don’t get how you can be hungry two hours later.”
“Don’t know, but it’s a sin. Or a good thing because it’s so damn tasty I don’t mind eating more later.”
“Yeah, there’s that. Hey, I got hired today as a substitute teacher for Whitehorse Elementary.”
“Cool, congrats. But I thought you weren’t going to do the teaching thing?”
Bren shrugged. “I don’t know yet. I need something so I can have money and eventually move out on my own, so I accepted the job. I’ve had applications all over the place, and this is the first one that panned out.”
“It’s a start. Have you thought much about what you want to do with your life?”
“Not really.” Bren got up, cleared the table, and placed the leftovers in Sara’s fridge. “Tell me more about how you decided to work at a bank. Did you choose that job before going to school?”
“I figured it out at uni. I took all those required courses the first year. Turns out I was very good at two things—math and management. I’ve always liked math and never once thought about working in any kind of management. However, like you, I needed to do something and I wasn’t like Liv, who was driven to get her degree in business administration.
“But, since that’s what she was doing, and I have to admit I had a big crush on her at the time, I followed her. I didn’t have any idea of where I might want to work, but there was an admin job at the bank, so I applied. Been there going on ten years now, and I love it. Most people think it’s a boring job, but for me it’s a challenge. Every day is different, and on some level, I’m actually helping people out.”
“Unless you have to decline a loan.”
“Yes, but that doesn’t happen as much as you’d think. I like the clients I work with, and I’ve got my own office. I won’t be doing loans forever, and there are so many other jobs I want to try out before I get to bank manager. It’s all interesting to me, and that’s what’s important.”
“That’s really cool, but is it weird to say that’s not enough for me? Like, I can do any job and get enough money to live on, but I don’t want just any job. I want my job to mean something. I don’t want to sound full of myself or anything, but I want my job to be one that changes the world.”
“You’re not full of yourself.” Sara joined her at the sink and stopped Bren from doing the dishes with a gentle hand on hers. “You’re a sweet woman who’s trying to find her spot in the world. There’s nothing wrong with that.” Sara put her arms around Bren and pulled her close for a soft, slow kiss.
“Thanks,” Bren said. “I’m a little lost on what job it is I ought to be doing.”
“Don’t stress about it. Concentrate on the teaching job for right now. You’ll figure it out. You might find out you love teaching.”
“Could happen I guess, though my internship sucked.”
Sara kissed her again, pulling Bren’s lower lip into her mouth. When she let it go, she said, “Don’t say ‘sucked’ when I’m standing this close to you. It gives me ideas.” And Sara was suddenly full of a lot of ideas concerning Bren. It might be the proximity or that Bren was incredibly sexy in her cargo pants and blue T-shirt, but it was suddenly very hot in the kitchen.
She’d been thinking about Bren since lunch when she got all those emojis. One emoji was a couple locked in a passionate kiss and that alone got Sara thinking about more than just kissing Bren. She wanted to explore their new relationship and do so when she was sober enough to remember every little detail.
Bren smiled as if she could read Sara’s thoughts. “Have you been drinking?” she asked with a tease in her voice.
“Nope. My mind is clear as a bell, and my body is getting more worked up by the minute.” She ran her fingers through Bren’s short hair and clasped her hands behind Bren’s neck. “I like you, Bren. And I’m attracted to you. But I’m not in a place for a relationship. As long as you’re okay with that, then we’re okay to continue. I just need to be sure. Friend dating, remember?”
Bren was hard to read, and Sara wondered if she was going to walk away.
When she spoke, there was a slight tremor in her voice. Her eyes never left Sara’s. “I like you, too, and if that’s the deal I need to make to be with you, I’ll do it. No relationship. Strictly casual. Got it.” Bren wrapped her arms around Sara and kissed her for all she was worth.
Sara moaned into the kiss as their hips rubbed against each other.
No fireworks. No explosions of overwhelming need. But there was enough spark between them that Sara felt the kiss all the way to her toes. Her body was ready, willing, and able. And for now, she told herself to stop thinking. Just feel.
The trip to the bedroom was made in record time. Bren’s hands were gentle and precise as she removed Sara’s clothes, piece by agonizing piece. Each new bit of bared skin was kissed lovingly and slowly. Bren’s movements were deliberate, and she knew exactly where to touch Sara to bring the most excruciating pleasure. Bren gently pressed her onto the bed, where her kissing continued down Sara’s body.
Sara’s hands tore at Bren’s shirt. She wanted skin-on-skin contact, but Bren had other ideas. She stopped Sara with one hand, then leaned on her forearm to lever herself over Sara’s body. Bren returned to kissing Sara’s very sensitive thigh, her lips moving closer to the apex of her legs while her free hand went from one breast to the other, massaging them in equal measure.
Sara’s hips rose as Bren’s tongue found her in the most amazing way. The first touch was electric, and she wanted nothing more than for Bren to take her. She couldn’t believe how much she wanted—needed— this. How was it Bren knew what to do so well and so fast? It was more than Sara expected, and the pleasure she brought her was divine.
As she reached her breaking point, Bren put her hand to work and Sara bucked the moment she entered her. Bren kept one arm around Sara’s hips as she pumped her other hand. Sara gripped the duvet with her fists and called Bren’s name as the orgasm r
ipped through her.
Bren stilled her fingers while Sara rode the last of the orgasm, her senses heightened and her legs twitching. Bren kept her hand still as she slid up Sara’s body, a very satisfied grin on her face. She kissed Sara deeply, curling her fingers a bit as she did.
“That was—amazing,” Sara said, her breathing not yet normal. She wiggled her hips when Bren began to tease her. “I wish you were naked right now.”
“I will be.” Bren nibbled along the edge of Sara’s collarbone. “Later. Right now, it’s all about you.”
“And why is that?” There was something in her eyes that Sara couldn’t quite figure out.
“I want to do this, Sara.” Bren kissed her slowly. “I want to please you.”
“You have, baby. You have.”
“But I’m not done,” Bren said and wiggled her fingers again.
Sara leaned her head back and moaned. “You’re not?” she asked, her voice husky.
“No way.” Bren kissed her throat, moving to the valley between her breasts. “I want to explore every inch of you.” She continued her kissing, taking a moment to lavish attention on each breast, her teeth grazing each nipple.
Sara was in agony and ecstasy all at once. She wanted more, and she didn’t care if Bren was fully dressed or not. “Bren,” she ground out between gasps of pleasure. “I really need—”
Bren cut her off with a kiss, then worked her magic once again. She took Sara over the edge and into a blissful moment of joy she hadn’t thought she’d ever have again.
Moments later, or it could have been an hour, Sara wasn’t sure of the time, Bren was naked and wrapped around her from behind. Her head rested on Sara’s shoulder, and Sara felt her warm breath by her ear.
“Thanks,” Sara said, still enjoying the tingling feel of Bren’s touch.
“Of course.” Bren placed a kiss behind Sara’s ear. “I’ve been wanting to do that since the first night we were together.”
“Really?”
“Oh yeah. Did I forget to mention that you didn’t let me touch you? Not even once?”
“Huh?” Sara turned to look into Bren’s eyes. There was a dim light from the street, and she could just make out her expression. She was smiling. “I think it’s time you told me, in detail, what the hell I did that night.”
“Details, huh?” Bren chuckled. “That might take a while. I mean, you undressed yourself like a stripper and hid all your clothes.”
“I know. You told me that part.”
“Then you undressed me, but I made sure my clothes were in a pile by the bed.” Bren laughed softly. “Once we were both naked, you practically threw me onto the bed and just had your way with me. And trust me, I had no intention of making you stop. It was amazing.”
“I had my way with you?” Sara turned around so she didn’t have to see the smirk on Bren’s face. “Oh my God. I’ve never—I’m never aggressive…”
“You were that night. I actually had to make you stop because you wore me out. I mean, I’m young and healthy, but seven times—”
“Seven times?” Sara sat up and glared down at Bren. “You’re making that up.”
“Nope. Seven hot, wonderful orgasms. You even joined me for one of them, though that was your own doing. It was kinda weird that I had to be hands-off, but you were doing so much that, honestly, I didn’t care. I’ve never had sex like that before.”
“Fuck.”
“Yep. And it was great.” Bren sat up beside her and pulled Sara in for a gentle kiss. “Besides, I don’t think I’d have done much to you anyway. You were drunk. I didn’t want to take advantage of you.”
“So you let me take advantage of you instead?”
“I guess you could look at it like that. I look at it as you did what you wanted to do, and I didn’t exactly think it sucked. Just sayin’.”
“And you still wanted to see me after? I mean, you must have thought I was acting like some crazy nymphomaniac.”
“Nah.” Bren cuddled her and Sara sank into her embrace. “We didn’t talk a lot, but I could tell you’d just had a bad breakup. I figured you needed to let off some steam, and I was happy to help you out. Trust me, Sara, it wasn’t a bad experience. Not for me. I’m just sorry you don’t remember it.”
“Me, too.”
“Why don’t we get some sleep? If you’re a good girl, I might let you ravish me in the morning.”
Sara laughed as they snuggled down, spooning again. “I might take you up on that offer.”
“Awesome.”
Chapter Nine
“I think it’s time we invite Bren to dinner,” Grace announced at their weekly luncheon at Pot O’ Gold. She was staring at Sara, but her voice held a playful tone. “Sunday sound good to you?”
Sara kept quiet for a moment to consider her response. “Are you trying to get me to subject Bren to you and Liv? For an entire night?”
“I wouldn’t put it that way, but she’s pretty damn important to you, and I thought we should get to know her better. A quiet dinner would be perfect, and I promise I’ll cook.”
“The promise of your cooking does get me a step closer to the table.” Sara took a sip of her diet drink and pushed her empty plate aside. “I like Bren a lot, but I’m not in love with her.”
“I didn’t say you were,” Grace said, her expression suddenly very serious. “But you talk about her a lot, and you see her a few times a week. Is there something I’m missing here?”
“I don’t know. We’re keeping it casual. I can’t commit to anything, and I don’t think I should. Bren’s a sweet woman, but she’s also so much younger than me.” Sara leaned back in the booth and sighed. “We’re having fun, but I’m still a little worried I’m going to hurt her in the end.”
“Why would you hurt her? You’ve told her it’s just a casual thing. You’re not girlfriends or partners. Is she seeing anyone else?”
“I don’t think so, though I kind of get the impression sometimes that she’s not completely present when we’re together. I guess we have that in common.”
“What do you mean?”
“Truth?” she asked and Grace made a face at her that said “duh.” “The sex is amazing with Bren, but there’s no real connection there. When we’re done and cuddling, it’s wonderful and I feel comfortable enough. But if I’m not careful I end up thinking about Terry.”
“Terry?”
“Yes. I think about how warm and safe I always felt with her around. The things she could do to me—the ways we’d make love… It’s not fair to Bren, and she can tell I’m thinking about her. Maybe not while we’re having sex, but sometimes I just sort of stare off into space because something reminds of Terry. When I look at Bren, she’ll have this expression that says she knows what I was thinking about, and I can see the hurt in her eyes.
“I still love her, Gracie. How can I move on when I’m feeling like this?”
“You can’t.”
“Gee thanks.”
“Sara, you can’t move on until you resolve your feelings for Terry. Maybe it means being depressed and sad for a few more months. Maybe it means going back to her office and having it out with her. Obviously, you’ve got some pent-up emotions about the situation. Regardless, you have to confront how you’re feeling or you’ll never move on. Assuming that’s what you want to do.”
“Huh? Why wouldn’t I move on? There’s nothing left where Terry is concerned.”
“I don’t know. Why was Terry the first person you called when Angel dumped you out on Highway 1?”
Sara couldn’t honestly answer that one. It was more an instinct than anything when she hit Terry’s number. Even if it’d been months since she actually called her for anything. So why did she think first of Terry?
“She doesn’t live far from where I was.”
“Neither does Liv.” Grace took a sip of her drink. “Try again.”
“I guess—maybe she was on my mind. Again.”
“Which brings me to my point. You have to resolve your feelings for her one way or the other. I know you still have them. I can see it in your eyes when you talk about her.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. You’re the easiest person in the world to read. I mean, you already said Bren can tell when you’re off thinking about Terry.”
“I know and I hate it. It’s like Terry’s haunting me, but she’s not dead. I can’t stop thinking about her, and it’s gotten worse since I’ve been going out with Bren. What the hell am I supposed to do?”
“Talk to her again. And don’t hold back how you feel. Get it out of your system. You might not be friends when you’re done, but you’ll have told her what’s nagging at you and you’ll feel better.”
“I don’t know. I’ll have to think about it.”
“Just don’t take too long. I think you’re right about Bren. It is unfair to keep her hanging on like this. She’s going to eventually need to know where she stands with you.”
Grace, of course, was right. And no matter how many times she and Bren talked about it, she felt Bren was becoming way too attached to her. “Now I know why Liv always says she hates it when you’re right. I’ll figure out a way to talk to Terry. Okay?”
“Sounds good.” Grace patted her on the hand. “I wanted to ask you the other day when you were over, but you were too upset—have you heard anything more from Angel? Is she leaving you alone?”
“Not really. I get text messages sometimes—not a lot of them. She’s called the office three times this week, but I ignored her. I think if I keep ignoring her, she’ll go away eventually. I mean, she’s the one who dumped me out of her car. What could she possibly want now?”
“To apologize,” Grace said. The words were simple enough, but Sara heard something else behind them. “Women like her apologize every time they hurt you. It’s like if they apologize, it erases the past and they get a fresh start. If she convinces you she’s sorry, she might get you to see her again. Only the next time, it might not be her telling you to get out of her car.”
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