Undoubtedly, the place was heavily protected by a battalion of armed guards, so breaking her out wasn’t an option. Realistically, there was only one way he could solve this dilemma and that was to come up with the money.
And when dealing with a tyrant like Vincent King, there was always little time for action. He had to move fast. He could not fail his daughter once again. No, this time he needed to be a hero. Her life depended on it.
His life depended on it.
Maddox stuffed the Smith & Wesson in the back of his jeans, turned around, and calmly walked down the three flights of stairs. Panic was not his friend; he could not accept it. He climbed into the Hummer and started the ignition, just sitting there with his hands on the wheel, his brother staring at him.
“Well?” Benny said.
Maddox closed his eyes and sighed. “Where is this mansion?”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
This Little Piggy Went to the Market
Addison Kane found herself lying in bed, body entwined with the man she loved the most, legs thrown over legs, arms wrapped around backs, faces pressed close together.
Almost as if he felt her gaze, Connor’s own eyes opened, meeting hers. He did not have to push his head far before their lips connected, a soft smacking sound as they welcomed each other from their dreams.
“You ready for today?” he asked.
“Be there for me?”
“Always.”
They got up and made breakfast. Connor grabbed the morning paper from the front porch and browsed through it with a cup of coffee. Candy, finally awake, stumbled into the kitchen, searching for her next bacon fix.
Addison nodded at the paper on the table. “Anything interesting?”
When Connor didn’t reply, she waved her hand in front of his face. “Hey, are you all right?”
His expression was one of pure horror. He tapped his finger on the newspaper. Addison leaned forward, discovering an article about a bunch of escaped zoo animals. Focusing, her eyes read the portion Connor’s finger directed to.
The part where it described a vicious cougar named Michelle digging up the corpse of a man out of the snow behind the local Walgreens. According to the article, a medical examiner declared the body already dead before the cougar encounter.
Addison found herself feeling very, very sick.
Candy slammed the refrigerator door shut and joined them at the table. “Uh, are you guys upset over this disastrous lack of bacon, too, or did I miss something?”
* * * * *
The Ford Fiesta cautiously turned into the trailer park, almost colliding with a large yellow Hummer gunning out onto the main road.
“Whoa!” Connor slammed down on the brakes.
In the backseat, Candy said, “Dude, that thing has no business driving in a place like this.”
Connor slowly drifted down the street, parking in front of a familiar trailer. It was painted green, and every step leading up the porch was missing.
“I’ll be back in a couple minutes,” Addison said, opening the door, but Connor stopped her.
“Wait, we don’t have any money, so what exactly are you going to do?” he asked, raising his eyebrow. “I think I better come in.”
“Then he definitely won’t help us,” Addison said. “Dave’s got a major ‘jealously’ problem with you. Just let me handle this, okay?”
“I dunno…”
Addison leaned over and kissed him. “I’ll be right back,” she said, and slid out of the car. She could hear Candy cheering from the backseat and flipped her off without even looking. Climbing up onto the porch, Addison rang the doorbell and waited until it opened, revealing a young man in a tank top and basketball shorts. His right arm was also replaced with a giant chainsaw, the tip of the dulled down blade pressing against the carpet.
The guy did not hold back his surprise to see her and Addison did not hold back her surprise at the chainsaw arm.
“Addison!”
“Dave?”
“What…what are you doing here?”
She hesitated. “Can I come in?”
Looking over his shoulder, he said, “Um, sure, but my grandpa is sleeping so we gotta be quiet.”
Addison followed him down the hallway and into his bedroom, watching him struggle to drag the chainsaw along. He sat down on his bed and she found a small chair across the room. She couldn’t not take her eyes off the machinery attached to his arm—but they were even, since he couldn’t take his eyes off her boobs.
“So, what’s up?” Dave asked.
“I could ask the same question.”
He paused, first confused then amused. “What—the arm? You didn’t know?”
Addison nodded. “I heard about it, but why is there a chainsaw? That couldn’t possibly work. Doesn’t it…you know, hurt?”
Dave smiled. “I was short an arm, figured I might as well go all out. I just never thought about how heavy a chainsaw actually is. But, on the flip side, it does make me look cool.”
“Uh huh.”
“So, what is it you wanted? How’s loverboy doing?”
“Connor is fine,” Addison said. “And I need your help with something.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I need a gun.”
He leaned back on the bed, waving his free arm. “Whoa, what makes you think I can help with something like that?”
“Because you sell guns.”
“I do not. That’s illegal!”
“You sell pot all the time,” Addison said. “I know you sell guns, too. C’mon now.”
Dave settled back down. “I suppose you want a discount as well, huh?”
“Actually, I was wondering if you’d just lend me it for a couple hours. I’ll return it, I swear.”
“You’re insane,” Dave said. “What the hell do you need a gun for, anyway?”
“It’s, uh, complicated.”
“You’re not going to tell me, are you?”
“Nope.”
“And you just expect me to hand you over a gun?”
“Yup.”
He shook his head. “You must think I’m stupid.”
“Yes.”
“Hey!”
Addison smirked. “I’m just teasing you, relax. Will you help me or not? You know I wouldn’t ask you unless this was really important…” And I was really, really desperate, she silently added.
“Yeah, yeah, you know damn well I’ll help.” Dave sighed, adjusting his chainsaw. “But, um, you’re gonna have to do something for me first.”
She paused, hesitant to ask. “What?”
And this time it was him who was smiling. “You know,” he said.
“Oh, God,” Addison muttered. “You can’t be serious.”
“If you need my help bad enough…”
“You realize this is the whole reason we broke up in the first place. It’s just too…creepy.”
“I am who I am,” One-Arm Dave said. “Now take off your shoe.”
“You’re disgusting,” Addison said. “If Connor found out about this he would kill you. Or puke, I’m not sure which. Maybe both.”
“Yeah, but he isn’t going to find out, now is he? So off with the shoe already.”
She kicked off her right shoe and held her leg up, telling herself that whatever she did, not to vomit.
“Only one lick,” Addison said. “And make it fast.”
“Will do!” Dave shouted in joy, leaping to the ground and nearing impaling himself with his rusted robot arm. He slowly crawled toward her in a seductive way that did not seem the least bit seductive.
She winced in disgust as he took advantage of her pinkie toe, the whole time One-Arm Dave chanting, “This little piggy went to the market, and this little piggy went into my mouth…”
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Fragile Bitch of Diptera
Johnny paced back and forth in the shed wondering how he had gotten there.
He had no memory of anything that preceded his euphori
c confrontation with the Fly. It had all been a blur, an intoxicated blackout that hadn’t ended until he was midstride in the middle of the shed. Something had finally flipped the light switch back on. His feet stopped moving. His body jerked to a stop.
Standing there, everything in the world made absolute sense.
He had to kill them.
He had to kill them all.
Johnny frowned. The prospect of slaying his family did not sound promising at all, nor the least bit fun. But he had to face reality—those “people” were not his family anymore. For God’s sake, they weren’t even people.
They did not belong in this world any longer and it was Johnny’s job to exterminate. Of course, there were others of these humanoid replications roaming the planet, but who honestly expected one boy to take care of them all? According to the Fly, Johnny was not the only soldier in this army of righteousness. There were thousands.
And according to the Fly, today would be one of the most important battles in history. Whoever won today would most likely win the whole war. Everyone was depending on Johnny’s success. If he failed, so did the Fly.
If he failed, evil would win.
Johnny looked around. He must have been here for a reason, right? Why the shed? He scanned the walls, the shelves. The place was full of those goddamn dolls his mother collected. These were the outcasts that came after there was no longer any room in the mansion. These were the rejects.
Why did they have to be so creepy?
Johnny spotted what his subconscious had been searching for all along. Three large kerosene tanks rested in the far corner. Beside the tanks were five miniature gas cans. It was enough flammable content to cause some serious damage.
He took a step forward, intending on getting straight to work, when a strange noise caught his attention.
His head snapped to the left. What the hell was that?
There it was again!
Some kind of laugh.
He cringed. Where was it coming from?
It grew louder, sharper.
Johnny collapsed to his knees. Where had it come from? Why was it here? What was so damn funny?
The noise was a hundred times worse than any chalkboard imaginable. He could feel his brain expanding against his skull—any second the whole thing would explode. Ka-boom.
Thoughts pulsating, ambiguous fears migrating, Johnny finally locked eyes with the monster.
Or, monsters.
The dolls.
But even that wasn’t right. Maybe they used to be dolls—just like how the things living in his house used to be his family. But no, these were not dolls anymore. These were something different. Something…dark.
“YOU WILL NEVER WIN!” one of the dolls shouted.
“VICTORY WILL BE OURS!” another one yelled.
“PREPARE TO BE DEFEATED, FRAGILE BITCH OF DIPTERA!”
Johnny shot to his feet. His fall would not be so easy, no siree. These plastic fucks would have to work a lot harder than that.
“You want a piece of me?” Johnny screamed at the dolls. “Huh? Well, here I am! Come and get me!”
One by one they poured down on him, gnawing at his now deformed face, making his body leak an ugly purple.
He pulled a couple off and whipped them against the wall. He managed to pick up a hammer on the workbench and began swinging away at himself, smashing the steel against the demons and against his own flesh.
Finally, black and blue from head to toe and drenched in his own sweat and blood, he dropped the hammer. Smiling through layers of exhaustion, Johnny lifted up a gas can.
Goats & Robbers:
A Wild Day In Loathsome
by Harlan Anderson
Yesterday, on Sunday, November 28th, the residents of Loathsome, Illinois experienced quite a day as the county zoo was infiltrated and, elsewhere, the local currency exchange, Loathsome Cash, was held up by two men in pink ski masks..
Regarding the zoo break-in, a trusted source reports security cameras recording the hoodlum in question. He was described as “in his late teens, light haired, and buck naked”.
If you happened to be waiting at a red light and a zebra stuck its black and white striped head through your window, you were not alone. Many automobiles were completely ruined by vicious tribes of goats.
Luckily, no one was killed, though there were many, many injuries. A hungry cougar (known to many at Loathsome Zoo as ‘Michelle’) dug up the frozen body of a man half-buried in snow behind the local Walgreens. An identity has yet to be released, but a medical examiner did declare the body long deceased before being found by the wild animal.
This incident is stated to have cost the city thousands of tax dollars in damage and loss of zoo animals. Trained animal marshals are still rounding them up. It is speculated that some may never be recovered, including a lion and a badelyne of ducks.
The timing of the zoo break-in with the attempted robbery at Loathsome Cash has led some sources to wondering if perhaps the two incidents are connected, one being the distraction for the other.
No money was taken, for a respected senior citizen managed to disarm the two men and chase them out of the building with a hail of gunfire. No one was reported injured.
Many witnesses have reported the two assailants were wearing pink ski masks. The cashier confronted by the two men revealed that they seemed to bicker constantly.
If you do spot these men, you are not to approach them; find a safe place to hide and dial the authorities. This cannot be emphasized enough.
Police have warned that the suspects are extremely dangerous and extremely fabulous.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Magnum Opus of a Madman
Gasoline had never smelled so glorious.
Johnny stood back, hands on hips, admiring his creation. God, it was perfection. People from all over the world had been studying the works of Shakespeare and da Vinci for centuries. Yet he was willing to lay down the entire family fortune that even the most educated inspector had never feasted eyes upon such a magnificent piece of art in their entire lifetime.
This, this here, this was what people called a masterpiece.
A magnum opus.
Soon, he would be taking his last breath as a mortal.
Soon, they would all be destroyed.
Everyone; everywhere. The world. The demons. The humans. The grass. The trees. The backstabbing lies posted on social networking websites.
It would all be gone.
Nevermore.
It began in the shed. He had soaked the dolls’ crushed corpses, had formed a puddle so thick surrounding most of the cement floor it might as well had been labeled Death’s Volatile Pond. And resting in the center of that pond was the first kerosene tank, cap unscrewed and ready to go.
A stream of gasoline led from the shed to the patio, sliding under the second kerosene tank. The kitchen door was propped open by a block of wood (itself also soaked in gasoline). Half of the kitchen floor was coated, splashed against the walls and slowly slithering toward other rooms branching from the food wing.
In the center of the kitchen there stood the beloved Desperation chocolate fountain; always running, always yummy. At first glance, it would be hard to notice the third and final kerosene tank floating peacefully along its pool of deliciousness, cap off, its vile contents contaminating his mother’s pride and joy.
The stove was turned on, switched to gas, all the way to HIGH. Below, in the closed and inconspicuous oven, rested the last can of gasoline, still completely full.
Standing at the side of the house, bare feet sinking into the snow, Johnny gleamed. This was fucking brilliant. He was brilliant. It was all brilliant. And they were all stupid, oblivious dogs waiting to be put down.
Feeling a tightness in his sweatpants, Johnny looked at the large bulge at his crotch. The atmosphere had excited him something fierce and he suddenly found himself wishing he could have a chance to make amends with his girlfriend so they could screw one last time.
/>
Fuck it; he slid his arm down his pants, grabbed his cock. The world would end soon anyway. Stroking his precious organ, Johnny could hear people yelling from inside the mansion.
Feeling a tingling in his nostril, as if a sneeze was on the rise, Johnny sniffled and continued to stroke faster, faster, faster…
It didn’t even interrupt his pace when the Fly buzzed out of his nose, hovering above his face, tiny wings fluttering in a purple blur. In his head, the Fly spoke:
“The time has come, Johnny.”
No kidding, Johnny thought amusingly, and began to spasm. His head thrust upward into the clouds, eyes piercing through what others could not see, mouth slightly agape—a moan that would chill Lucifer’s spine.
“You have served Us well.”
And then the whole world was a fireball.
Chapter Forty
Benny Makes a Good Point
Nearly doubling the speed limit, the Hummer raced down Libertyville. “There!” Benny eagerly tapped his fingers against the window. “That’s it! That’s the one! I’m sure of it.”
“How?” Maddox asked. “Every single one is identical.”
“It just is, all right? Doesn’t that one just look more…uh, richer, to you?”
“You gotta be kidding me,” Maddox said, swerving around a parked Ford Fiesta, gunning forward a few hundred feet and then slamming on the brakes in front of the designated mansion.
“I kid you not,” Benny said matter-of-factly. “This is the place. I’d bet my last beer on it.”
“You don’t have any beer.”
“Don’t change the subject.”
Maddox sighed. “I can’t believe I’m going to steal from a family. This is beyond low.”
Benny slapped the dashboard. “Ah fuck ‘em! They have enough dolls to earn an entire new fortune. They’ll be fine. We, on the other hand, will not. Now let’s go rob us a crazy woman!”
Toxicity Page 23
