Tannhauser 02: The Twelve Children of Paris

by Tim Willocks

  She knew Tannzer knew who Amparo was.

  And because Tannzer was sad, and because he knew that Amparo was his daughter, she wasn’t frightened of him any more.

  Tannzer didn’t move and he didn’t speak; he just stood there and looked and knew the things that he knew. Estelle wished she knew them, too, and yet she was glad that she didn’t. She knew being lonely. Her friends were rats; and a dragon. But Tannzer was the loneliest person she had ever seen. Tannzer wasn’t one of us.

  Tannzer wasn’t one of anybody.

  Estelle felt sad, too.

  She felt sad for Tannzer.

  She pulled away from Grymonde. The satchel was cutting her again. She took it off and put it on the ground. Grymonde bent towards her, as if trying to see her, but without his eyes it didn’t matter how far he bent down; he couldn’t. He couldn’t ever see her ever again, and it hurt him inside. It hurt Estelle, too. She looked up into the white dark holes and she saw the bits that were burned black, and the blisters that trickled as if his skin was crying because his eyes could not. She realised it must hurt, very, very badly. She felt deep pain, deep in her stomach, for Grymonde.

  It was strange. Tannzer and Grymonde were so big, and she was so small, and Amparo was much smaller still, yet she felt sad for the two big men, and so did Amparo.

  ‘La Rossa, don’t go away. I’m still here, I’m still me, inside.’

  ‘I’m not going away, don’t be afraid. I can still see you, in the white dark holes.’

  Estelle hadn’t wanted her mama for a long time. There wasn’t usually much to want. But she wanted her now. At least Typhaine could see.

  ‘Did Mama come?’

  Grymonde ducked and twisted his head in a circle, like a bull. He scowled.

  ‘I haven’t seen her for a while. Don’t worry about her.’

  ‘I was afraid she might be a Judas, like Papin.’

  ‘She was a Judas all right,’ said Andri. ‘Now she’s dead, God curse her soul –’

  ‘Be quiet, fool, and be gone,’ said Grymonde.

  His head lunged this way and that, trying to find her.

  ‘La Rossa? Where are you? Are you there?’

  Estelle felt as if her body was empty inside. She hugged Amparo.

  ‘I’m here.’

  ‘Your mama is dead, La Rossa, my darling, yes, but she was no Judas. She was murdered by the same swine as took my eyes. She was a mad and fiery beauty, and she did what she did for love and for hate, not for silver, and for that and all, we must love her.’

  Estelle was glad Typhaine wasn’t a Judas. She was glad Grymonde loved her.

  ‘Are you there?’ said Grymonde.

  ‘I’m here.’

  ‘Don’t leave me.’

  ‘I won’t. Can I give Amparo to Tannzer?’

  ‘You have the wren? For the thorns?’

  Grymonde laughed. Estelle didn’t know why. He seemed brain-cracked.

  ‘I have my sister, Amparo.’

  ‘You brought her down from the tiles?’ said Grymonde. ‘Alone?’

  Estelle felt Tannzer’s eyes on her. She didn’t dare look at him.

  ‘The soldiers didn’t see us.’

  ‘My love, my darling, my beauty, yes, yes, give the little wren to her thorns. She is waiting for them.’

  ‘You mean to Tannzer?’

  ‘Yes, La Rossa.’

  Tannzer had watched everything in silence.

  Estelle turned and showed Amparo to him. She looked at him.

  Tannzer came closer. The moon had come up. It shone bright and craggy behind him. He made the Yards seem small. He bent over and looked at the babe.

  She saw his face.

  She had never seen such a face.

  It wasn’t that it was strange, in the way that Grymonde’s was, yet it had things in it, invisible things, that made her tremble inside, things that made her wish he was her friend. He was wiser than Grymonde and at the same time more wild. He wasn’t as brawny as Grymonde, yet he was stronger. He was finer than Grymonde, yet even more like a demon. As Tannzer looked at Amparo his face changed, and the things that had made her tremble went away, as if they had never been there, and Estelle knew she was seeing things in that face that no one else had ever seen before. Because Tannzer’s eyes were seeing something Tannzer had never seen before. Only Estelle and her sister could see these things, because Grymonde was blind.

  ‘Tannzer?’ said Estelle.

  ‘Aye.’

  ‘This is Amparo.’

  Tannzer took a mighty breath and held it. He sighed. He smiled. Some of his teeth were broken. He nodded, as if he had been on a journey for a long, long time, and from a long, long way away, and had finally reached the place he had been looking for. He made a sound and his throat choked. He coughed. When he spoke, his voice amazed her. It was as gentle as he was big.

  ‘Amparo.’

  Estelle had never heard such love in one word. Or in many. Tears filled her.

  ‘Amparo.’

  Estelle didn’t cry the tears. She held the babe out towards him.

  ‘You can take her if you like. Carla said she’s yours.’

  Tannzer didn’t move, for a long time.

  He didn’t take Amparo. Estelle was confused.

  Tannzer straightened up. He seemed taller than before. He looked at her.

  ‘La Rossa, is it?’

  ‘Grymonde calls me La Rossa. My name is Estelle.’

  ‘Estelle.’

  She was sure she heard love in that word, too. But how could she?

  ‘You were named for the stars above,’ said Tannzer.

  ‘The Morning Star.’

  ‘Call it the most beautiful.’

  Estelle’s arms shook and she pulled Amparo back to her chest.

  ‘Shall I tell you what Amparo’s name means?’ said Tannzer.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘It means Shelter from the Storm.’

  The name took Estelle’s breath. She looked down at the babe in her arms.

  ‘We find ourselves in a world of blood and thunder,’ said Tannzer. ‘Do you think that little nightingale can shelter such as we? From such a storm?’

  Estelle thought about it. She remembered how she had sat on the bed with Alice and Carla, and how safe it had made her feel to be one of us, even though it was a world of blood and thunder. And they wouldn’t have been sitting there at all if not for Amparo.

  ‘Yes. She sheltered me and Carla. And Grymonde, too, I think.’

  Grymonde made a painful sound. The white dark holes in his face glowed.

  Tannzer nodded, as if he had expected as much. He stared at Amparo.

  Estelle didn’t think that Tannzer needed shelter, but she said, ‘I know she’d shelter you, too, if you wanted her to.’

  ‘She has already sheltered me.’

  Tannzer looked at Estelle. He didn’t look at her as if she was a girl, but as if she was as big as he was. It was a strange feeling. It made her feel stronger.

  ‘Did you know, Estelle, that even in the darkest storm, by day or night, the stars – most of all the Morning Star – still shine above it?’

  ‘No.’ She thought about it. ‘Because the stars are higher than the storm?’

  Tannzer’s brow rose. ‘You have a rare mind.’

  ‘Is that good?’

  ‘It is marvellous. You are right, the stars are always higher than the storm. And so, if Amparo gives us shelter from the storm, and you, the Morning Star, shine above that storm, what have we to fear?’

  ‘Nothing?’

  ‘I am very happy to know you are Amparo’s sister.’

  Estelle stared at him. She felt Tannzer had given her something precious, but she didn’t know what it was. She didn’t feel sad for him any more. He didn’t need that either.

  ‘I love my sister more than anything in the world. But don’t you want to hold her in your arms?’

  ‘I do want to hold her in my arms, Estelle. More than I want to breathe. But the storm
, of blood and thunder, isn’t over. Those upon whom it must fall do not even know that it comes. And Amparo will not shelter them. Shall I tell you why?’

  ‘Yes, tell me.’

  ‘Because Grymonde and I are that storm.’

  Grymonde let out a roar of violent ecstasy.

  ‘Heaps upon heaps shall I slay. Give me another Immortal.’

  Tannzer didn’t stop looking at Estelle.

  ‘And because I am the storm, I can’t hold Amparo until the storm is done.’

  ‘Because the storm might hurt her?’

  ‘You are a clever girl. Will you hold Amparo for me, then? A while longer?’

  ‘I’ll hold her forever if you want me to. I like holding her. I only thought you would want to hold her, too.’

  ‘I do, Estelle. I do. But if I held her, even once, the storm might rage less fierce. And if we are to return Amparo to Carla, as we must, the storm must be terrible.’

  ‘That’s what your angel told you, isn’t it?’

  ‘My angel?’

  ‘The Angel with Black Wings.’

  ‘Her grandmother had a gift,’ said Grymonde. ‘She saw what most of us can’t.’

  Estelle didn’t know she had a grandmother. She wanted to ask about her.

  ‘I understand,’ said Tannzer. ‘Special gifts often skip a generation.’

  ‘We have an angel, too,’ said Estelle. ‘Carla sent her, with me and Amparo. She has wings of moonlight. The Angel told me to bring Amparo to you, instead of to the nuns at the convent. I hope Carla won’t be angry.’

  ‘I agree with you and your moonlight angel. Better Amparo take her chances with us than with those black crows. Carla will be proud of you, as am I. I thank you both.’

  Tannzer turned away and picked up the sharpened spear. It had three points, for extra killing. He took hold of Grymonde’s right hand and put the spear in it. Grymonde planted the spear and Estelle could see that it made him feel steadier. He touched the longest blade and sucked blood from his thumb and nodded.

  ‘What’s in your satchel?’ asked Tannzer.

  ‘A pistol.’

  ‘And powder and ball, a purse of gold,’ added Grymonde.

  Tannzer took out the double-barrelled pistol. He examined it.

  ‘This is a Peter Peck. It’s worth a fortune.’

  ‘Perhaps it was,’ said Grymonde, ‘to the swine I stole it from.’

  Tannzer sniffed the barrels. ‘It was recently fired.’

  ‘Not by me.’

  ‘I shot Papin,’ said Estelle. ‘He fell off the roof, after you did.’

  They looked at her and didn’t speak. She waited to be chastised.

  Grymonde started laughing, like a cracked-brain. Tannzer winked at her. She felt good. Tannzer took out a flask, and a ball and a patch, and recharged the barrel.

  ‘Can we come with you?’ asked Estelle.

  ‘No,’ said Grymonde. ‘Wait here for us. You’ll be safe.’

  Estelle looked at Tannzer.

  ‘I can still fly on his back. I can be the eyes of the dragon, instead of the wings.’

  Tannzer studied her. She saw the invisible things that made her tremble. He looked at Amparo. Estelle trembled more. Tannzer poked Grymonde with an elbow.

  ‘What does Estelle mean?’

  ‘I’ve carried La Rossa on my shoulders, many times, all over the city.’

  Tannzer packed the powder flask. He untied the knot in the strap and hung the satchel across Grymonde’s chest. Estelle pulled out the key hanging round her neck.

  ‘Can I wind the Peter Peck?’

  Tannzer looked at her again, then held the pistol while she wound it.

  ‘Grymonde, in what casket of treasure did you find this girl?’

  ‘That’s a tale now known only to me, and I’ll never tell it.’

  Tannzer beckoned a boy with a harelip. The boy held a bald dog by a leash.

  ‘Grégoire, this is Estelle, and her sister, my new daughter, Amparo.’

  Grégoire smiled and bowed. He was ugly, uglier than the dog, but seemed nice.

  ‘Grégoire, I see a kidskin on the table there. Empty it and bring it over.’

  Tannzer stuck the pistol in Grymonde’s belt.

  ‘The pistol is for Estelle,’ said Tannzer. ‘If she asks for it, give it to her.’

  ‘What madness is this?’ said Grymonde.

  ‘My daughter comes with me,’ said Tannzer.

  Tannzer looked at Estelle. She held her breath.

  ‘If it is her desire, her sister, Estelle, will come with us, too.’

  ‘No,’ said Grymonde. ‘She will not.’

  Estelle wanted to go with them. The idea made Grymonde suffer, but why? Why did he want her to stay here, with the dead, and without her sister? She didn’t dare speak.

  ‘Can children make such decisions?’ asked Tannzer.

  Estelle almost said, Yes! But although the two big men were talking about what she wanted to do, she knew she would have to do what they wanted. She bit her tongue.

  ‘Clearly, they can,’ said Tannzer. ‘Should we let them? Or should we reckon their wisdom less than ours, here, in the Hell that the likes of you and I have slaved to build around them? I do not know. What say you, my Infant?’

  ‘The Infant does not say.’

  ‘This day has taken me beyond all knowing, short of what I know of the worst, that is, the worst I know I can do. That limit I hope not to reach, though if I have to breach it, I will not hesitate. Such crimes aside, I can only blunder forward, as blind as you are, with naught but my heart and my gut to guide my way.’

  Estelle watched Grymonde’s burned face twitch. She loved him.

  Grégoire returned, shaking drops of wine from the kidskin.

  ‘I say this only as a fact, not as a threat to sway your mind,’ said Tannzer, ‘but if Estelle stays, you stay, too. Without her, you are a stone in my boot.’

  Estelle was proud that Tannzer wanted her to come, but she didn’t want to leave the dragon. That choice scared her.

  ‘If your purpose holds,’ said Grymonde, ‘and you pick the Devil’s pocket, and you and your wife and child escape Paris, will you take La Rossa with you?’

  Estelle tried to imagine what this meant. She couldn’t. But she wanted to go.

  Tannzer smiled, like she imagined a wolf might smile. He took the kidskin from Grégoire and cut away the neck and spout. Estelle was confused.

  ‘What future awaits her here?’ said Grymonde. ‘Plague and the brothel.’

  ‘Estelle, if you want to stay here, say so,’ said Tannzer. ‘It would be the brighter call. I am going to wade a river of blood and there’s no telling who will reach the far side bank. But Amparo is coming with me, even should the red tide drown the both of us.’

  ‘Oh, I want to come with you. So does Amparo.’

  ‘What say you now, my Infant?’

  ‘The dragon can’t fly without La Rossa. He never could.’

  Tannzer pulled the kidskin inside out. He held it open in front of her.

  ‘Put Amparo in here. This will be her cradle. You will carry her home.’

  Estelle understood: of course Tannzer would take her with him.

  She slipped Amparo inside the kidskin. She filled it quite snugly and her little face peered over the top. Estelle laughed. She looked so sweet. Tannzer stooped and tightened Estelle’s belt a notch. The top buttons on her chemise were still undone. He unbuttoned another. Estelle wasn’t confused any more. She was going with them. She smiled. Tannzer smiled, too. Estelle put Amparo and her cradle inside her shirt, her little face poking out at her throat. The wineskin was wet and cool against Estelle’s skin. The cradle felt strong. Tannzer buttoned the chemise up and stood back to judge the result.

  ‘A baby’s tougher than you’d think. Just make sure she can breathe.’

  ‘I will.’

  Estelle’s heart was pounding. She was going to fly.

  ‘Grégoire, give me the sergent’s belt.’
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br />   Grégoire unleashed his dog and Tannzer coiled the belt around Estelle’s chest, across her shoulder and under her armpit. It held Amparo more strongly. Tannzer manhandled Grymonde into position. He reversed the spear in Grymonde’s hand.

  ‘The blade’s grounded so watch your toes. If you fall, I will leave you.’

  ‘Fall? Give me another Immortal, man. And take one for yourself.’

  Tannzer stood behind Estelle and picked her up under the armpits and hoisted her high. Her stomach dropped. She kicked her legs up and landed on Grymonde’s shoulders.

  ‘Don’t touch his face,’ said Tannzer. ‘Is Amparo set right?’

  Estelle shifted the kidskin to ride on one thigh, and circled it with her arm.

  ‘She’s right.’

  Estelle saw that a gang of the yard lads and girls had gathered.

  ‘We’ll come with you, chief!’

  ‘We’ll take the bloody palace if you ask us to!’

  Tannzer turned his back to the gang and spoke to Grymonde.

  ‘Bold but sly is our game. They’ll only be meat for the butchers.’

  Grymonde faced the gang and raised his arms.

  Estelle looked down on them. She had never been so excited or so scared. Her legs gripped the huge neck. She sucked her forefinger, to make sure it was clean, and put it to Amparo’s lips. Amparo suckled the fingertip. Grymonde’s war voice rocked the Yards.

  ‘Children of Cockaigne. The time has come for me to bid you farewell.’

  ‘No!’ cried the lads and the lasses.

  ‘Yes. I am resolved to drown in the bath of blood I will spill from the veins of our enemies. Do not mourn me, but keep me alive in your hearts, for there I shall be. Always. Listen for the weeping of their women in the days to come. Listen for the tales that will be told of the Infant’s passing, for they will fill you with awe. And let that weeping and those tales be your warrant to rebuild the Land of Plenty. Will you do that for me?’

  ‘Aye!’

  ‘Will you give me your oath on it?’

  A rowdy and heartfelt din filled the yard with promises.

  ‘No tomorrow!’ roared Grymonde.

  Estelle watched Tannzer shoulder two bows and two quivers. He picked up a crossbow and walked away. The hare-lipped boy followed him. The hairless dog with the golden collar followed the boy. They were going to the river of blood.