Coup De Grâce

by Lani Lynn Vale

  I hung up on her.

  “Fuck it,” I panted, pulling up Dr. Mead in my contacts and pressing dial.

  “This is Dr. Mead,” he answered three rings later.

  “This is Nikki Pena Perez. I’ve gone into labor. I’m at the ER right now,” I told him quickly.

  “I’ll be right there. Tell the doctors I’ll be there in twenty minutes or less,” he said quickly.

  “10-4,” I agreed and hung up my own phone.

  I grabbed my purse and bailed out of my car before I tried calling Michael again.

  Luckily, this time, he answered. “Yeah?”

  He was breathless.

  “I’m in labor,” I panted, hoofing it all the way to the ER doors before another pain nearly took my feet out from under me.

  “Where are you?” He asked sharply.

  “The ER,” I told him, happy that my contraction had left me, but unhappy because another one was right on its heels, which meant that I was getting closer to delivery. “I’m less than a minute apart.”

  Something which I proved moments later when another contraction slammed into me.

  This time, I really did have to go to my knees because I was sure if I didn’t, I would fall on my face.

  “Ma’am, are you alright?” A woman’s voice called from the doorway.

  I looked up into Lennox’s familiar eyes.

  “No, I’m pretty sure I’m having this baby, and my asshole isn’t here yet,” I told her.

  Then a commotion from the ER’s entrance startled us both enough that we looked up only to see Michael running out with a bandage covering his eye.

  “Michael!” I screamed, panicked now that my eyes caught sight of all the blood staining his shirt.

  Michael dropped down to his knees beside me, gathering me into his strong arms as he said, “I’m okay.”

  “Isn’t that something I should be saying to you?” I asked, raising my hand to look at the wound being covered by the bandage.

  He grimaced and helped me stand by putting both arms underneath mine.

  “Suspect knocked me over the head with a wrench,” he explained. “Now tell me about you.”

  I panted as another pain hit me and said, “I’m having your baby.”

  He laughed.

  “Generally, that’s what labor usually indicates,” he teased as he helped me to a wheelchair that Lennox pushed out.

  “You have the entire emergency room in an uproar, little lady,” Lennox crowed as she held the chair as I sat.

  “Why?” I asked with worry.

  What had I done to warrant such a reaction?

  “Michael here has everyone scared as hell of him. Something he proved weeks ago when he told the charge nurse that, under no circumstance, was anyone but his parents, him, Dr. Mead or me to touch you when you go into labor without him being in the room. Not to mention he threatened them,” Lennox laughed. “So guess who your personal helper will be until Dr. Mead arrives!”

  I shot my husband a look, but he shrugged as if he could care less what everyone thought of him.

  “Please, ignore him. He won’t bother anybody,” I shook my head. “Plus, we’re heading up to Labor and Delivery anyway. So we’ll never even see anybody in the emergency room. How’d you get to leave the ER for this?”

  “Thank God,” Lennox said as she walked with me to the elevators. “I got to help because your husband decided to have a talk with my boss. She agreed, so here I am!”

  I just shook my head and closed my eyes as another pain washed over me.

  “Another one?” Michael asked, looking down at his watch.

  I nodded, too breathless to speak. “Yeah.”

  “A minute and a half apart. Epidural or no epidural?” He asked.

  I closed my eyes and tried to block out the pain…but I couldn’t.

  Which answered the question he asked rather quickly.

  We’d been fighting over the epidural or no epidural question for months now, and I’d told him that I’d have to wait and see.

  He’d insisted on a birth plan, and I’d shook my head, telling him that babies did what they wanted to. There was no rhyme or reason. No woman’s pregnancy was the same, and I couldn’t base a birth that hadn’t happened yet on a hunch.

  Now, I was sure.

  “Epidural,” I insisted through gritted teeth.

  I felt like my uterus was trying to force its way out of my vagina.

  God, it hurt.

  And I was sure that Michael was only getting one kid, because this motherfuckin’ hurt.

  “One kid, Michael. You better enjoy this one,” I informed him.

  He smiled. “We’ll see.”

  “No, we won’t. We really won’t. I’ll never be able to forget how this feels. It’s like razor blades tearing through my uterus, and a pair of needle nose pliers trying to rip the spasming organ out through my cun…” Michael slapped his hand over my mouth as the elevator doors opened.

  I’d been screaming, and apparently he didn’t want me to scream ‘cunt’ in general population.

  Lennox had no problem laughing her ass off, consequently forgetting she was supposed to be pushing my wheelchair.

  Michael, exasperated, took over the job and pushed me to the nurse’s station where they immediately gave us a room.

  “What? Did you threaten them, too?” I asked with a narrowed eyed look over my shoulder.

  Michael smiled. “You’ll never know.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  The man was incorrigible, and he couldn’t help himself sometimes.

  “Are you going to let any of the nurses take care of me?” I asked dryly. “You’re horrible.”

  Michael helped me into the bed once he’d locked the wheelchair’s wheels, and I sighed in relief to have my feet up.

  “Yeah, as a matter of fact, he is!” Hannah crowed as she came into the room.

  I rolled my eyes. “You know, it’s really, really weird to have your sister in law’s hands up your cooch.”

  Hannah smiled. “We’re all adults here. If you can handle it, I can handle it.”

  I just shook my head. “I haven’t seen you on this floor in a while. How perfect that you’re on shift today,” I said dryly.

  Hannah grinned. “In reality, I wasn’t supposed to be on this floor today. But I’m scheduled on this floor for the time being until you’re back from maternity leave.”

  She gave me a pointed look that said she’d known where I was today. Something I’d told her but not my husband.

  I blushed.

  I was supposed to be on maternity leave.

  But when Jasmine had begged me to continue seeing her once I’d graduated school, I could do nothing less.

  Even if it meant I had to deliver her kid while I was in labor with my own.

  Something Michael hadn’t realized I’d done yet, since I’d left while he was at work and conveniently forgot to tell him.

  “That’s cool,” I said, changing the subject.

  “Alright, Hannah, check her out so we can see where we’re at,” Michael ordered.

  Hannah shot him a disproving look. “I know how to do my job, boyo.”

  His brows rose. “You’ve been talking to Peek.”

  Hannah grinned and lifted up her shirt to reveal her belly to us.

  She’d gotten a tattoo of Reggie’s name on her lower hipbone in bold, beautiful scripted letters.

  “Wow, that’s awesome,” Lennox and I parroted at the same time.

  Michael smiled. “It hurt, didn’t it. I told you not to go there with your first tattoo.”

  Hannah shrugged. “Hurt like a motherfucker. But Peek gave me a shot of Jack Daniel’s to tide me over. And kept them coming until it was done. When I left I could barely stand. Had to call a cab to take me home.”

  I gasped as another contraction tore through me, bringing everyone’s attention back to me.

  “Alr
ight, you know the drill,” Hannah picked up a gown and tossed it at Michael. “Help her in that, and we’ll step outside the curtains. Let us know when you’re done…and what the fuck happened to your face?”

  I coughed to cover up my laugh.

  She’d just now noticed that after being in the room with him for ten minutes?

  Michael ignored her and swung the curtains closed himself before walking over to me.

  “You ready for this?” He asked softly, his eyes taking in my every feature.

  I nodded and started to strip my shirt over my head, followed by my sports bra.

  Michael’s eyes flared as he caught sight of my swollen belly and big breasts, but managed to stand still as I stood and pushed my maternity yoga pants over my hips, followed closely by my panties.

  I offered him my hands, and he slipped the gown on over my chest, covering my nakedness without one lewd touch or comment.

  He must really be scared, I thought.

  Which stood to reason.

  I was scared to.

  Really scared.

  But the thing about Michael and me was that we’d both gone through hell together, and had come out the other side.

  We had our scars.

  We had our doubts.

  But we also had each other, and as long as I had him at my side, we could get through just about anything.

  “I love you, Mikey Mike,” I whispered, knowing it’d draw a smile from him.

  And he didn’t disappoint.

  He smiled, eyes sparkling.

  “I love you more, Nik.”

  “Impossible,” I whispered fiercely.

  “Nothing’s impossible when it comes to you. You showed me that,” he said just before pressing his soft lips against mine. “You ready for this?”

  I nodded and touched the side of the bandage covering up the right side of his forehead.

  “Have you had this taken care of?” I asked, feeling another pain coming.

  He nodded. “Ten stitches.”

  I winced.

  Not only because that was a lot of stitches, but because it felt like this child of ours was trying to claw its way out of my vagina like a tiny Hulk.

  “Epidural,” I insisted.

  He smiled and helped me sit back down before yanking the curtains open.

  Lennox and Hannah turned from their discussion, hurrying up to my bedside.

  “Alright, lay back and let me feel you up.”

  I covered my face with my hand as Hannah snapped gloves into place over her hands.

  “Sit back, I’ll try to make this good.”

  I huffed out a laugh as I moved until I was flat on my back, moving my enormous beached whale body until I was in position, then slowly open my legs.

  Hannah didn’t waste any time doing her thing, and I was grateful.

  “You know,” Lennox said from her positon by my head. “I’ve never seen a pregnant woman so calm before.”

  I didn’t say anything to that.

  I was freaking the fuck out.

  Michael, though, didn’t need that from me.

  I was sure he was already nervous enough, and I didn’t want him to regret having a kid.

  He didn’t need yet another insecurity, and I wouldn’t be the one to give it to him.

  “Do you remember what I do for a living?” I panted.

  “You’re at six centimeters and fifty percent effaced. Doing good. You can still have an epidural, but I’d recommend making that decision quickly,” Hannah said, taking my gown and covering my knees.

  Lennox sat the head of the bed up, and I looked to Michael to see him staring at the wall.

  “What is it?” I asked him.

  “I can’t tell you how disturbing it is to see my sister’s fingers up your…you know,” Michael informed me.

  I smiled at him.

  “You’re better at it, if it makes you feel any better.”

  He made a gagging sound. “Disgusting.”

  I snickered as Hannah tossed her used gloves in the trash and washed her hands. “I’ll go get the on call anesthesiologist. We’ll get your shit knocked right out.”

  “Should she be talking like that?” I asked, eyes closed as I tried to breathe through my next contraction. “Motherfucker, this hurts like a bitch!”

  The room stayed silent for long moments while my question and subsequent comment hung therein the air around us.

  “What?” I asked, opening my eyes to squint at Michael.

  He just shook his head. “Nothing.”

  Lennox busied herself hooking up the monitor, starting an IV, and drawing blood while Michael and I watched the screen to monitor my progress.

  “That was a big one,” Michael said a few minutes later.

  I grunted.

  I knew it was a ‘big one.’

  Simply because I’d felt the motherfucker.

  But I tried to be nice about it.

  “Uh-huh,” I agreed tiredly.

  Then Michael and Lennox started talking about medical jargon that was too advanced for my exhausted brain to process, so I ignored them and tried to sleep during my contractions.

  Something I realized wasn’t working very well.

  Especially since two of my favorite people in the world, under normal circumstances, wouldn’t shut the fuck up.

  “Go away,” I muttered.

  The talking stopped, and I ordered my husband to do my bidding.

  “Go call your family and mine. Let them know what’s going on. And stop talking over my body. It’s annoying,” I ordered them.

  Michael chuckled as he bent down and kissed my forehead. “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Okay, Nikki. This is Amy Jones, the nurse anesthetist. She’s going to do your epidural for you. This is Eddie Gonzales, he’s the anesthesiologist that she works under. They’re here to answer any questions you might have. Okay?”

  Michael froze on his way out the door, but then I started having another contraction.

  “Get out so she can do her job,” I ordered my ornery husband.

  Amy’s eyes followed Michael’s progress, brows raising to see what he’d do.

  Michael chose correctly, though.

  He offered his hand to the two of them, said, “I’m going to call my family,” and left the room.

  “Eddie and Amy,” Hannah said. “Is there anything you need from me? I have another patient that’s in the final stages of pushing.”

  Amy shook her head when Eddie looked at her. “No, that’s all, thank you.”

  I knew Eddie, and the moment Hannah left the room he walked to my bedside.

  “You ready for this rodeo to get started?” He asked teasingly.

  Eddie loved to tease me.

  We worked well together, trading barbs back and forth like two children in a play yard battle.

  He loved the Yankees, and I was a Texas Rangers fan all the way. Which tended to make us butt heads from time to time.

  “Well, I was all ready to have you teasing me while giving me the epidural,” I grunted, toes curling when the next pain hit me. “But I guess since you’re too good for me I’ll settle for Ms. Amy.”

  Amy didn’t smile, but Eddie did.

  “I have a C-section with triplets in about fifteen minutes. I’m sorry, but she’s cooler than you are,” he admitted openly.

  I laughed. “Yeah, that’s what they all say.”

  He winked. “I’ll check back in with you later.”

  I nodded and watched him leave the room.

  As my face turned to Amy, I was immediately struck with just how different she looked now that Eddie was out of the room.

  Like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde different.

  “You okay?” I asked her worriedly.

  She walked to the door and closed it slowly.

  “Don’t you need a nurse?” I asked. “And your stuff?”

  She didn’t answer as she drew t
he curtain and turned back to me, walking towards me with a new purpose that set my instincts on edge.

  “Your man fucked up,” the woman whispered to me. “You’d think with how cautious he was being with the doctors that he’d pay a little more attention to who was about to inject all sorts of fun drugs into your spinal column.”

  I looked at her nametag and realized with a sinking feeling that she had the same last name as Dr. Jones.

  Her name was Amy Jones.

  Wife or daughter?

  I couldn’t tell.

  And why had I never seen her before?

  I worked on this floor, and it was kind of a rule that I saw everyone on it seeing as I was a midwife. It was good business to know my colleagues.

  “Don’t you mean my epidural space?” I asked worriedly.

  My hands were sweaty, and my thighs quivered as I prepared to launch myself from the bed.

  Only before I could, Amy Jones produced a gun.

  “Don’t move,” she hissed. “I don’t really need your cooperation. I think I’ll just do it the quick way.”

  My body froze.

  “There’s oxygen in this room, not to mention my husband is right outside,” I tried to reason with her. “Surely you know that you’ll never get out of this unscathed.”

  She shrugged.

  “I don’t really care. At this point, I just know you need to be gone, as well as him, before I go. You’ll be my final couple. How does it feel?” She said soothingly, bringing the IV tubing that was going into my right hand up to her stomach.

  I could see the syringe in her hand, and knew she was about to give me something.

  Which was why I yanked my hand to the side hard and quick, ripping tape, hair, and skin as I forcefully removed the catheter from my vein.

  She glared at me disapprovingly and shook the gun at me for emphasis.

  “I told you not to fucking move!” She whispered forcefully.

  I moved.

  I couldn’t help it.

  It wasn’t in me to lay back and take what was coming for me.

  “Hey, I just got word from Dr. Mead. He’ll be here in just a few minutes. He got held up by a train on 18…” Lennox’s voice trailed off as she got a load of the situation she’d walked in on.

  She looked to me, then back to Amy before raising her hands up near her head. “Don’t shoot her.”

  Amy kept the gun pointed at me, but she was glaring at Lennox, which was why she never saw me move close to the emergency ‘code blue’ cord and yank it from the wall.