“Oh, hell.”
“He’d had enough to drink that his aim was off, so I was able to duck under his fist.”
“But you were gone for hours.”
“We argued for hours. He said he would never forgive me for approaching you in the first place. He asked about our sex life, which I didn’t answer. I tried to explain that it’s the perfect scenario for all of us, and that he could still see you and date other women. He said he would never be willing to share you.”
“That doesn’t sound good at all.” I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me.
“Look, I’ve known the guy for a long time. He doesn’t make decisions quickly, and he needs time to think it all through.”
“Did he mention the accident?”
“No.” He threaded his fingers through mine and held my hand. “In a way I think you did him a favor.”
“How’s that?”
“You gave him something else to focus on. I think the accident is the last thing on his mind right now.”
“That’s an odd favor, I must say. So you think he’ll change his mind? What’re we going to do on Wednesday? When do we tell our friends?”
“He said that he wouldn’t be coming by on Wednesday and that he never plans to talk to me again.”
“Fuck, so now what? Should I call him?” I sat up in the bed and let go of his hand.
“I’m sure you’ll be hearing from him.”
“You should go then,” I said, pushing him out of the bed. “Bond might come by. It’s a far walk, but not an impossible one.”
“Let’s go to my place and—”
“No, Red. As much as I’d like to resume what we started earlier, I think I need to be here for Bond. We will have plenty of time to be together.”
“Promise me that tomorrow you’ll spend the night.”
I touched his cheek and said, “I promise.”
After walking him to the door, he swept me up in a steamy kiss, branding me as his. He lifted me up by my lower back, and I wrapped my legs around him. With my back against the door, he nudged his clothed hard cock into my mound and ravished my mouth with his tongue, leaving me breathless.
“If you are trying … to get me to change … my mind. You’re doing a great job of it.” I lowered my legs to the ground. I wanted to follow him home but knowing Bond, he would be showing up sooner or later. I opened the door and pushed Red through. “I love you and I’ll see you tomorrow after work.”
“Come straight over. I want that shower!”
“Yes, sir,” I said, saluting.
“Do you need another spanking?” he said, prowling back toward me.
“Maybe,” I said with a grin, closing the door before he reached me. I laughed out loud.
“I can hear you,” I heard him say through the door.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Turning Tables
by Adele
Red left me with a huge smile on my face. How I got so lucky with him remained a mystery. All my fears regarding him changing his mind were for naught, and I couldn’t miss the fact that my relationship with Bond had caused many of my insecurities. At the same time, I worried about Bond and what he must be going through. I started a text to him five different times and erased each one. What could I say? What should I say? I finally settled on:
Me: Checking in. I spoke to Red and wanted to make sure you’re okay.
Bond: How do you think I am? I know I’ve put you through a lot over the years, but this is bullshit.
Me: This isn’t punishment.
Bond: What would you call it?
Me: I didn’t mean for it to happen and neither did he.
Bond: Maybe you didn’t but he definitely did. I know that man better than anyone.
Me: He waited a long time according to him.
Bond: He should have waited indefinitely. I’m almost there.
Me: Walking?
Bond: Cab.
Fuck! I ran into my bedroom and threw on a pair of purple, plaid PJ bottoms and a white T-shirt. After checking myself in the bathroom mirror and fluffing out my hair, I plunked down on the couch to wait and texted Red:
Me: He’s almost here.
Red: You said you thought he would come by. Tell him the truth.
Me: Now I wish I hadn’t sent you home!
Red: It’s better this way, love. I’m here if you need me.
Me: Okay. I think I need a drink.
Red: You’ll be fine. He won’t try to punch you.
Me: Here’s hoping you’re right.
I hopped up and tromped to the refrigerator. Scanning the shelves, I found a partially filled bottle of moscato wine. I grabbed a cup and filled it with the clear liquid. Drinking it, I refilled it with water and downed that as well.
I jumped up and down a couple of times and shook out my arms. I felt like I was gearing up for battle. I knew he would show up; I just didn’t know what else to expect. In some ways, the tables had been turned, and now I was the one having to deal with the hurt lover. Bond was much more proficient in dealing with that scenario. Me, I had no idea how to navigate through it.
His intense knock startled me even though I knew it was coming. When I opened the door, he blew through it, running his hand through his long hair, still in the clothes from earlier in the night. He sat on the edge of the couch and propped his arms on his knees. I stood facing him with my arms folded across my breasts.
He peered up at me and said, “If you were trying to get my attention, it worked.”
“No, Bond. I’m just trying to find some happiness for myself.”
“He makes you happy?” he asked, the lines intensified across his forehead and there was a slight quiver at the corners of his mouth.
“Once we stopped fighting, we realized we were attracted to one another. I’m not sure what you want me to say.”
“Neither do I.”
I moved over to the couch and sat next to him. “Look, we both love you, and it was actually his idea that I date you both. I thought it was ridiculous at first. Being sandwiched between two alpha males sounds like a recipe for disaster, but even Lainie sees the genius in it. She pointed out that I’ve never been able to let you go and—”
He turned his head to face me, “I agree with Lainie, we’re meant to be together.”
“That’s not what she or I meant, Bond. You and me, we don’t work.”
“That’s horseshit and you know it.”
“Do we have incredible sex together? Sure. Are you a good emotional fit for me? Absolutely not.”
“And Red is?” he said, his arms gesturing wildly.
“Yes, actually, he is, at least as far as I can tell. I love you, Bond, but you’ve spent years taking me for granted, and it left me feeling so insecure about myself. With Red, I don’t feel that way. Maybe all those years of fighting helps me tell him exactly what’s on my mind. With you, I’m always scared you’ll reject me again, leaving me in the morning to fuck someone else.”
“That’s not fair.”
“What’s not? Which part?”
“I’ve always been straight with you, Jacqs and for the last time, I didn’t sleep with anyone that day.” He touched the side of my thigh.
Brushing his hand away, I said, “That time. So what? I’ve always wanted more from you; you were never willing to try. Now you want to because I’m involved with someone else. Why be angry at Red? He’s not only willing to give me the love I need, but he’s also willing to let us still be involved. If anything, you should be thanking him.”
“That’s a stretch for any sane person, and as far as I’m concerned, Red crossed a line that can’t be uncrossed.”
“This isn’t a normal situation.”
“No, it’s not. I do plan to take advantage of his supposed generosity, but I don’t ever plan to speak to him again.” He shifted closer to me.
“Meaning what?” Even with my guard up, his proximity revved my libido.
“This.” He pushed me down on the couch and cove
red me with his body before I had a chance to protest. He stared down at me with his light brown eyes and plundered my mouth with his kiss. His aggression jolted through me, causing the familiar pool of wetness between my thighs.
I tilted my face away and said, “Wait, wait!” I shoved against his chest, but he didn’t budge.
“I’m not going anywhere. Either we can be together or we can’t.”
“I don’t know how it’s supposed to work and—”
“It works like this…” He stood, lifting us both to our feet. Spinning me around, he tucked my back against his chest, pushing my long hair to the side. He kissed and sucked his way along the nape of my neck causing thunderous vibrations to cascade over my body. My nipples hardened as he slid his hands over my covered breast. As if losing patience, he lifted my shirt over my head and resumed his fondling. He plucked at my nipples, which caused me to groan and collapse against him. Cupping my breast in one hand, he held me securely, while the other slid under the waist of my PJs.
I gasped in anticipation as he delved into my wetness, spreading my labia. Instinctively I opened my legs, offering myself to him. Held in his tight embrace, he filled me with his fingers, and cradled my ass against his erection.
As it happened every time he drew me into his sphere, my body reigned supreme and my mind shut off. Being with Bond was the most exquisite mixture of decadence and degradation. Feeling at once redeemed by his attention as if his very energy could wipe away all the past hurts, and scared he would withdraw again, leaving me bereft.
I somehow managed to yank my mind to the surface and said, “Wait! Wait!” I scrambled away from him.
“What?”
“We haven’t established the rules and I just got tested for STDs. You can spend the night, but I don’t want to have intercourse.”
“Listen, Jacqs—” he said, sauntering up to me with his beguiling smile.
I held up my palm and said, “Those are my conditions. Take them or leave them.”
“Okay then, get back here.” He grabbed my arm and tugged me toward him. He pulled off my pants and drew me back against him. Wrapping one arm across my stomach and settling his other hand between my legs, he stroked my smooth lips and said, “This is my favorite part.”
“Ohhh,” I moaned.
“Do you get this wet for him?” he asked, dragging me back to the couch, which caused me to land on his lap. He used his knees to spread my legs wide as he resumed finger fucking my pussy. With his other hand he massaged my clit in time with his penetration. “Jacqs?” he said, imploring me to answer.
“I don’t … want … to talk … about him,” I muttered.
He stopped moving, and I squealed in protest.
“If you want to come, you’ll answer me.”
“Fuck! Bond, what is it with you men? Yes, he makes me wet. Does that make you feel better?”
“No, it doesn’t. He and I are so different. I don’t see how you could—”
“Really? Is this supposed to inspire me to want to spend time with you both? Because it’s not working!” I got off of his lap and went to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet, but I couldn’t pee. All I could do was wipe away the excess wetness.
Bond leaned against the doorframe and said, “We have to talk about this stuff.”
“Not in the middle of sex, we don’t. And I’m not willing to do this with you guys until you can talk with each other so we can sort all this out. Since I was dating Red first, you’re the one who’ll have to wait.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? We were dating first.”
I shoved Bond out of the way and climbed into the bed, covering myself with the sheet. “Our occasional fucks don’t count. It has been over six months since we were trying again. Sleep on the couch if you’d like.”
“Jacqs, come on,” he said, sitting down next to me on the edge of the bed.
“It’s too easy for me to give in to you, Bond. I’m not doing it anymore. You have to sort this out with Red. I get that you’re angry and I understand why you would be, but had you taken me into consideration, even the least bit, I would never have been open to a relationship with him in the first place. You can decide to stay mad and make all of our friends choose sides or you can let go of your pride and see that we can all get what we want. But let me be crystal clear with you; I’m not willing to be stuck in between the two of you and some feud. You have to decide if you can love me enough to let me love him too.”
“No man would put up with this shit.” He stood up, undressed, and got into the other side of the bed.
“Maybe not. Trust me, my first response was, ‘no fucking way’ and I never thought you would consider it.”
“I’m not considering it.”
“Well then, that makes it very simple. I’ll be right back.” I got up and retrieved my pajamas that were left by the couch. I slipped them on and climbed back up on the bed facing him.
“How can you possibly think this would be simple?” he asked.
“Like I said at dinner, you and I will remain friends, but no longer lovers.”
“No, Jacqs, that just means I need to change your mind and win you back.”
“For what purpose?” I asked, crossing my legs and hunching forward.
“Because we love each other, and we’re meant to be together.”
“If you mean as friends, then I totally agree. If you meant more than that, then no. We’ve been over this so many times.” I felt exasperated. “I’m not built like you. Sex means something to me. You need to find a woman who wants to fuck around all the time, but will stay involved with you. I’m sure she’s out there somewhere.”
“I love you, Jacqs.”
“I know you do, in your own twisted way. I believe you.”
“And you love me too,” he said, scooting closer to me.
“Yes, I do, but I won’t let you hurt me anymore.”
“I don’t mean to hurt you. Why Red? Why did it have to be him?”
“I really don’t know how to answer that. Proximity, compatibility? I don’t know. At first I was just angry with you and he made me feel better but now—”
“Oh, so like a revenge fuck?”
I ignored his comment and said, “But now it feels like something … more … something with potential.”
“Why not have a fling with Stay or Kev? I hear he and Cat are into sharing. Even Dawg would be a better choice.”
“Are you even listening to yourself? Dawg? Now that’s funny. He rivals you with his womanizing.” I laughed at the image of me and Doug, aka Dawg, together. I loved the man, and he was way closer to my height than either Bond or Red, but seduction dripped from every pore of the handsome, short, black man. His French-Canadian accent seemed to woo even the most innocent, but I had successfully sidestepped his charm.
“Who is out with me every night, picking up women? Red, or have you conveniently forgotten that part?”
“According to him, he never sleeps with a woman on the first night,” I said, sitting up straight.
“Oh, is that the line he used on you?”
“Are you saying it’s not true?”
“It’s not like we’re holding hands while we fuck, but I think he has grossly stretched the truth.”
“He also said that he hasn’t been with a woman for months.”
“I don’t know what game he’s playing, but we have been out with many different ladies over the last several months.”
“Are you saying he’s lying to me?” I placed my hands down in front of me and glared at Bond.
“That would be my guess. We don’t talk about our conquests, but it sounds like a load of bullshit to me.”
“Is this what it’s going to be like?”
“What?” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“You poisoning the well?” I said, pointing at him.
“Why should I make it easy for him?”
“You should make it easy for me. If you love me as you say, then let me be
happy.”
“Be happy with me. I’ll try to be what you need.” He reached out to me.
“No more other women?” I said, shaking my head.
“Yes, I’ll try.”
“Try? I’m going to crash. I need to get up early and it’s already ungodly late. Sleep where you want but no sex.”
I took my phone into the bathroom and got ready for bed. After I had brushed my teeth, I texted Red.
Me: Crashing and I’ll call you in the morning. Miss you.
Red: Is everything okay?
Me: Not really, but like you said, it’s going to take time.
Red: Can you meet me for lunch?
Me: Can we play it by ear? I’m not sure how tomorrow will go.
Red: Sure. Love you, Little One and thanks for texting.
Me:Night.♥
Crawling under the covers, I rolled onto my side away from Bond.
“Come on, Jacqs, we can sleep together at least.”
He tugged me to him, and we took our usual positions. As he hugged me to his chest, I sighed, loving his natural scent. Part of me still wished Bond could be what I needed and at the same time, even with permission to date Bond, it felt like I was being disloyal to Red. I wanted to heal all of Bond’s pain and hurt and show him enough love that his past could live in its rightful place. Cuddling against his neck, I wondered if I could stay open to the possibilities and still protect my heart. With Bond’s arms wrapped around me, I drifted off into a deep sleep.
When my phone alarm went off in the morning, I struggled to open my eyes and noticed Bond wasn’t next to me. After using the bathroom, I plodded into the kitchen. I poured a cup of coffee and added cream, noticing that Bond sat out on the screened in porch. I rarely went out there.
“Did you sleep?” I asked, sitting in a chair across from him.
“Not much.” He took a sip of coffee.
“Are you working tonight?” I brought my legs up on the seat and tested the temperature of the coffee.
“I’m not up for chitchat, Jacqs.”
I placed my coffee down on the glass tabletop between us.
We sat in silence until he said, “I want you to stop seeing Red and give us a real shot.”
Stuck in Between (Bound by Your Love) Page 18
