by Amanda Miga
I'm not confident enough to walk beside Violet, but I'm more worried that I’ll collide with strangers while Alex smothers her. The heat that announces Dash’s closeness is becoming an everyday occurrence. It’s the only clash I accept because Dash doesn’t listen and my body is getting used to him at his side. He never thought it was possible, but it's probably because Dash is a hybrid.
“You’re okay.” Dash says under his breathe.
“This isn’t a good idea. There are too many people.”
“You could’ve said no for your sake, but you said yes for hers. Have faith in yourself. Remember who you’re doing this for.” Dash motions to Violet.
I stare at the back of her head which seems to be moving about like a child visiting an amusement park. Alex is walking next to her with a huge grin on his face. I hate that he be in her head. The corner of his eye checks me.
“The city looks like a bright and colorful carnival at night. I always thought so with all the lit signs and glowing store fronts. It reminds me of…" Violet stops walking. Her eyes look beyond the street corner to where a large fountain is centered in a small park.
“Vi, are you okay?” Alex's lowers his mouth too closely to her ear, it makes my chest hurt.
“Yeah,” she gives him a fake smile, but Alex’s frown doesn’t budge. I wait to hear Alex reveal what’s wrong, but the bastard says nothing.
“Can we stop there for a moment?” She points to the fountain.
“Of course." Dash leaves my side for Violet’s and now I see the back of all three heads.
We make their way to the fountain. Dash digs into his pocket for a coin to throw in. Alex follows Violet like a puppy as she walks around the massive concrete structure. I stand on the ledge looking into the water.
“Here, make a wish?” Dash holds out a penny.
I hold out my hand and Dash smirks as he drops it into my palm. He knows. It's like a thing with us.
“You have any idea what she’s thinking?”
Dash can see things just as Alex can hear them. They're also ahead of the game since they read Red's journals.
“Yeah.” The fountain lights put a glare on his glasses so I can’t see his eyes. “She’s been here with Red and Grey. It was the first time she’d been out of the Sanctuary.”
“So this place is,” I rubs the penny, “… is special?”
Dash nods. I want something like that with her. Something special for her to think of me with but how could I compare?
“Don’t worry. You’ll get your chance.”
“How do you know?” I jump down from the ledge and Dash’s eyes are visible.
“You haven’t made your wish yet.” He discards a penny into the fountain like it meant nothing to him. I look at my shiny penny. I'm supposed to make a wish.
Dash joins Alex and Violet while I throw my coin in and wish for the only thing I've been thinking about since meeting Violet.
***
Gabriel
We stand in line waiting to get into the theatre. The stickers and fliers plastered to the billboards beside us advertise the music Josh often raved about. The smell of cigarettes triggers memories I want to forget. The world outside of the Sanctuary hasn't changed, but I have. I fear it. I haven't kept up my survival routine so my awareness is not as sharp.
“Vi, we're celebrating remember?” Alex is still trying to comfort her. After seeing the fountain, her smiling face hasn't reappeared.
She hugs herself. “It’s hard to celebrate when we should be hard at work trying to find him.”
“A little fun can't hurt. Plus, being cooped up in the Sanctuary wouldn't do any good to Red or you for that matter.”
"Yeah but going to a concert would?” Violet folds her arms. “Not sure I get the logic in that, Alex."
"It's what I know. Clears my head." Alex says. “Sometimes you need a break.”
Dash snickers. "With the music blasting in your ears how could you think?"
"Are sure he even thinks at all?" I laugh. The comment brings a slight smile to Violet’s face. I did that.
“You’d do the same if all you heard were voices. The music drowns it out. It centers me.” Alex stands with his shoulders back.
“Well, it was proven that music does calm the insane,” Dash smirks. “Especially people who hear voices in their head.”
Violet tries to hide her chuckle behind her fingers. Alex's mouth twitches. Seems he isn't used to being the butt end of a joke.
If it makes Violet feel better I can take it. "Assholes." Alex shoves his hands in his pockets.
Now, if your hands can just stay there... I cock my head up.
My hand will do as they please. At least I can touch her.
You can't touch her.
Well I have.
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
“Hey! Is there something I should know?” Violet folds her arms. “I’ve seen this before. Please, no secret conversations. Whatever it is, spill it.”
I avert my eyes. The line starts to move. I hate to hear Violet sigh. The sound of a zipper brings me back to her. She's opens her purse taking out a wallet, flipping through wads of cash. "We can eat inside, can't we? I have enough for everyone."
"I'll pay Violet." Alex says.
"That wallet. It's not Red's but his signatures all over it. May I see it?" Dash nearly knocks me over as he approaches Violet.
“No Dash. It’s not exactly mine.” None of us can ignore the sudden cloud of sadness that made it back over her face. She doesn’t want to give up the wallet but not because of the endless cash inside of it, but because it’s Grey’s. Dash quickly places his hands in his pocket and looks at Alex who nods.
I hate the secrecy between the two. I'm the only one left out of the soundless conversations.
“Here, take this for food and drinks, not alcohol. Got it?"
"I told you, Vi, I'll pay for it."
"You kinda need ID for that anyway," Dash reminds her.
"Maybe you could get some for us?" Alex unveils his charming smile and hooded eyes.
I roll mine.
"I'm not old enough either.” Violet doesn’t fall for his charms and looks straight into his eyes. “I wouldn't if I was. Come on. Alcohol makes you do stupid things.” Alex and Dash look at each other again.
Fuck, what does that mean?
Dash, as if to some ability knew what I was thinking, says in my ear, "She was drunk when she kissed Red."
"What?" I say it too loud. It feels like someone punched my gut just thinking of her kissing Red.
"I'll tell you about it later." Dash says under his breath. No I want to know now. Violet looks a little paranoid. Dash leans and tells me. “I noticed her looking around a little too often. She's afraid this was a mistake. She's afraid of the entity.”
Entity? “What does that mean?”
“I’ll tell you later.”
Why does everyone know shit except me?
She's anxious, fiddling with her jacket and looking around impatiently. Kissing Red, entities, old memories; I don't know anything about her. If she's so scared and this is uncomfortable for her, I wouldn't have said yes to going out.
“Vi, chill. You’re freaking out for no reason.”
“I have every reason to freak out, Alex.” Her eyes scan around them but I don’t know what she’s looking for anyway. The line starts to move again when Alex invades her space. I clench the inside of his pocket.
"You'll feel better inside I promise." Alex says while lightly stroking her arm.
“Alex!” She says squirming away from him. “Don’t.”
But Alex just stares at the back of her pretty head. He smiles when she’s not looking. I bet he doesn’t regret touching her lovely skin even for a second.
You’re an asshole. You can’t touch her.
No harm done, although, my body is on fire after that hot touch.
I want to punch the satisfaction off his face.
Dash gives Alex a look whi
ch removes his grin I'm grateful for that but I still out of the loop as to what he could have thought to make Alex's grin disappear.
***
Violet
Inside the rock music is booming loud enough that it reverberate through my stomach. Alex is right. The music is just what I need. The constant stream of music triggers memories of Grey. Somehow I smile. We made memories of listening to music for hours in his room. It’s something we shared, a love for music. Alex loves music just as much as Grey. He's been telling me all along how therapeutic it can be. I'm so glad I said yes to come out.
I make my way through the crowd. My energy responds to the sound as my heart pulses with the bass. The excitement fills me as I dance among the people. She'll give energy rubbing shoulders and bumping into bodies, but it doesn’t matter—everyone here is feeding off one another anyway. Moving my body with the ocean of people, I don’t feel like a hybrid; I'm no different than anyone else. My mind is at peace and carefree. My thoughts fall away as I meet Alex who gives me nod and an even wider smile that read 'I told you so'.
***
Gabriel
"You want a beer?" Dash shouts over the music.
Alex peels his eyes away from Violet in the crowd to Dash flashing Grey’s wallet.
“Did you steal that? How did you—?”
Dash pushes up his glasses and grins. He proceeds to whip out three valid I.D. cards.
"How?" I'm astonished. Everything is correct: the address to the abandon building; my picture and my birthday with the year altered. I'm apparently twenty-one. How does he know my birthday? I'm impressed. I look to Dash whose cheeks flare up.
"I made them. I read in journals that I am an architect type like Red," Dash smiles.
"There's types? What does that mean?" I look to Alex.
"It means he just became my best friend," Alex says, taking his new ID and wrapping his arm around his shoulders.
“Drinks are on me,” Dash smiles.
"I've never had a beer before."
Dash and Alex chuckle, but I don't think it's funny. There's a reason I don't drink. I hand back the card.
"Just have one." Dash pushes it back.
"One is like water," Alex examines his card. "Have two. Live a little. It won't get you drunk."
We head to the bar in the back of the theatre. Hand our IDs and drink our beers. As I drink my beer I notice it's always full. It must be Dash's ability that made it possible that our beers, no matter how much we drink, our bottle are always filled. I try to measure but I loose count and I have a good handle on myself. I'm proud. Alex starts placing his arm around Dash telling him he’s the best. Dash wobbles and I'm slightly lightheaded but my aura is in check.
The band plays a million and one songs and each one is my favorite. Clanging our beers and constantly spilling them, we laugh and enjoy what music has offered us—a good time with new friends and time with a happy Violet.
Moved by the flood of sounds, we surrender to the music and after too many beers we lose each other.
I can easily enjoy the band where I stand. There’s no one to worry about because just about everyone is in the crowd, but me. My ability to hold my aura in is not the problem, but having people bump into me constantly is. I wander away from the perimeters and decide to join the party. I think I can take it. I think people are too into the band to find me anyway if I touch them.
I enter the crowd like a warm bath. It feels incredible. No one is paying any mind to me, but they feel me. They don't know I'm the source of the sudden pleasure. Jumping and moving with everyone, I feel normal; I'm anybody but Gabriel Black.
Before long, I spot Violet enjoying herself. Into the tight rhythmic crowd of people, I watch her. Her closed eyes are just as beautiful as when they're open. Her shiny wavy hair captures the flashing lights like fireworks over water. Everyone around me is in their own trance, pushing into each other, rubbing against each other, sweating all over each other like one big organism swaying. The crowd takes her away like a message in a bottle, floating in the ocean of people. I surrender my body as the crowd around me compresses and take me too. Hands are raised in the air but I'm still, I'm wedged between singing voices and jumping rebellious bodies.
I squeeze my way, my personal space rule is already broken and now my aura flexes like wings. Buzzed and centered only on her, I push recklessly towards her, setting off auras around me. I ignore them. I want only her. My Violet.
I shift my sight to see her aura; a radiant blue flame surrounds her. Even among the rainbow of color blooming in my sights, she stands out with a red surface that looks as if it’s on fire around her sapphire aura. The crowd nearly takes me off my feet as they advance me to her. I suspect if my body is just inches from hers, our auras will touch. I want to touch. Curiosity and longing propels me forward through the orgy of people.
I make it to Violet, but she’s unaware I'm just feet away. I'm entranced as our Hybrid auras touch just for a second. I step back feeling a rush of ecstasy spread throughout my body instantly.
Her eyes shoot open and turn to look among the faces. She doesn't see me, lurking behind others. She has an uneasy expression on her face, so I patiently wait for the music to take her away again. I can be patient as the auric touch still lingers in my body to savor. The overwhelming sensation of arousal is so addictive, hunting her makes me feel impossibly lustful. It feels right. It feels natural. I move so my approach will be from behind. I wait for another gap of people so I can swoop in to her aura entirely. It doesn't take long and I enter her personal space.
***
Violet
An overwhelming force merges with my being; forcing its way into me, wanting to possess me; the feeling that could only be Red, but Red isn't here. My thoughts slip away and I'm lost in a haze making me limp. The music rhythmic sound matches my heartbeat and prolongs the high as I let the surroundings drown me.
The crowd compresses and moves again. Grabbing my waist, the distinct body pushes into me. I place my hand on his. The touch is so magnetic. The vibration between us intensifies, striking my womb like an instrumental chord. I try to think, but it's impossible to; all I can do is let him take over.
***
Gabriel
My heart is pounding out of my chest. My heavy breathing only elevates as I bask in her aura. The instinctual lure that's gotten me into trouble so many times before is making an emergence once again. Only now, I want this. I want this more than I wanted anything in my life. She is what I crave; what my body needs. But I need more than my body flush against hers; I want to consume her; take her for everything she possesses. It might hurt, just for a second, but she'll surrender. They always do.
Violet leans back resting her head under my chin. I lower my nose to her neck and breathe her in. Her scent is strong but I want to own the part of her that will be the main source of my appetite. Her essence will be stronger there. I drag my hands to the front of her waist, reaching under her top and down her jeans. Touching her skin will give me an orgasm if I think about it too much.
The crowd compresses and moves again, pushing me hard into her from behind. I groan. Her hips move as the song changes. My heart continues to pound in my chest as her every movement teases me below. My face presses into her neck. The need to devour her is great. My mouth opens and my teeth graze her skin and I bite. Her body shutters in my grasp.
Her body relaxes as my hands travel further down. The crowd sways, grinding us together. My fingers dig into her skin. Violet's hazy eyes flutter as I press suggestively into her, hardening as I nibble her. My hand reaches down, down to the thin fabric the separates my lust from her innocence.
The crowd shifts violently. We separate.
Violet opens her eyes. She's alert. I try to make my way to her, but she sees me and pushes her way through in the opposite direction, melting into the crowd.
Still in predatory mode, I sense she's near, lurking between the bodies. I'm so close to having her. I will not let her go s
o easily. Finding her in a disoriented state, I creep closer for my advantage. Our auras clash and I forcefully pull her to face me. Her weak will allows it. I grab hold of her waist and bring her in. "I love you." I lean in to kiss her. The crowd disconnects us and Violet runs a way.
***
Violet
I push desperately through people to the exit, but find a wall. I press my back to it, watching for Gabriel. I crouch down so he doesn't see me.
How could I let this happen? He’s only sixteen, how could he be this strong? Feelings arise within me, dangerous ones. He feels like Red. Warm and hot; soothing and arousing. I can't believe I let him touch me. My mind is stuck on it. He said he loves me. He has a crush on me. I'm so stupid! I have to let him know I'm not interested. I hesitate on the thought and scold myself. He's just confused. I smelled alcohol. Maybe it was an accident.
I sit flush against the brick wall through two songs before heading to the back of the theatre. I can't be alone with him anymore, it will be dangerous.
I spot Alex, who’s so into the music, he doesn't even notice me holding his arm tightly. I bury my face in his side. I don't care if my aura affects him. It couldn't possibly do what Gabriel did to me. The violation triggers tears.
"I'm sorry Alex."
“Violet?” He says over the music, placing his arms around me and leads to the exit doors where the music won't cover my thoughts. I don’t look up from the ground; I don't know if I can look at Gabriel right now. Dash's sneakers appear into my view.
“Get that asshole for me, we’re leaving.” Alex rubs my back. It feels nice. It's not right but he feels safe and he can read me without me saying a word. He's quiet and his presence in my head is reassuring. I let him pick my brain. His arms tighten around me, a comforting feeling I haven't felt in a long time. I'm almost ashamed I like it. He's protective and right now that's what I want.
