Trust And Obey

by Ts McKinney

  “See you in the morning, kitten.” His finger traced the outline of Landry’s swollen lips. “You were beautiful tonight. I look forward to learning every secret your beautiful body and even more beautiful mind is trying to hide from me.”

  Chapter 7

  Colton watched as Jagger moved around the small room, folding clothes and making certain everything was in its proper place, nice and tidy. Orderly. It was the way Jagger craved things and while Colton could care less, he’d learn to be as neat as possible to try and please his lover. Jagger might not be OCD, but he was so close to it that he scared the life out of it. His boy loved everything in its proper place and since Colton loved Jagger, he held his tongue and tried to wait patiently for his sexy piece of sin to finally make his way to their bed.

  Not that watching him didn’t hold a multitude of cock hardening moments. Wearing nothing but a pair of short, black boxer briefs, Jagger was the most beautiful sight in Colton’s world. His lean muscles, graceful and agile, danced seductively with each innocent movement. His pale Kentucky skin had finally turned a beautiful bronze and the change made Colton’s mouth water. To be fair, the pale skin had made his mouth water, too. His hair was a little longer and currently looked tousled enough that one could easily think he’d just taken a tumble in bed. He hadn’t, at least not yet.

  When Colton noticed Jagger’s sexy blue eyes looking longingly at the closet door that held the vacuum cleaner, he knew it was time for him to intervene. At one time, early on in their relationship, he’d gotten his feelings hurt when Jagger seemed to choose cleaning over getting his ass pounded into the mattress, but he’d quickly learned it was just how Jagger’s mind worked. When he knew things needed to be done, he was driven to do them. He was focused. Colton learned that he merely needed to break that focus…you know—get him focused on something else.

  He licked his lips loudly and said, “Hey, Wildcat, can you grab me a beer? And a sandwich.” He smiled when Jagger’s head whipped around to look in his direction. “Yeah, a beer and a sandwich would hit the spot.” He gave his belly a couple of pats before returning his hand to the spot behind his head. He was lounging on their bed, propped up on a couple of pillows with his hands resting behind his head. Oh, and he was naked. Naked and aroused.

  Jagger blinked at him a few times before a sassy smile stretched across his face. “Sure, babe. Can I rub your feet and suck your toes after I bring them to you?”

  Colton could see when all thoughts of cleaning vanished from Jagger’s brain with a puff of horny magic. Still sporting that sassy smile, he climbed onto the bed and crawled in Colton’s direction, not stopping until he was straddling his hips. His hands were braced on the headboard above Colton’s head as he took a few seconds to enjoy just how fucking perfect they felt together. With his hard length branding Jagger’s balls and taint straight through his boxer briefs, Colton made sure it became hard for him to concentrate on anything other than just how perfect it felt when he slid inside him.

  As much as the sex, though, Jagger always said he enjoyed the time they spent in bed, talking about how each of their days went and what was on the agenda for tomorrow. He’d told Colton that he hadn’t ever had that before – not with anyone. He said he wasn’t sure Colton realized it, but sharing words with him was one of the biggest ways to prove how much they loved one another. Of course, Colton made sure that as soon as they finished talking, he used his body, instead of words, to prove the same damned love point.

  Leaning down, Jagger kissed Colton’s lips and whispered, “I was doing it again, wasn’t I?”

  “Yep,” Colton answered with an exaggerated popping sound and a wiggle of his eyebrows. “And while you are sexier than fuck doing that OCD stuff in our bedroom, I was starting to get lonesome in this big giant bed all by myself. I’m just a tiny thing and I need you to keep me warm.”

  Jagger barked out a laugh. “You’re bigger than me and it’s still like a hundred degrees outside and the sun’s been down for three hours. I think you’ll survive without me to keep you warm.”

  Colton grabbed a handful of ass and said, “Yeah, but I can’t survive without this!” Then, with a softer smile, he added, “Or this,” as he tapped the spot over Jagger’s heart. He watched as Jagger struggled with inner demons that demanded that he look away from the intensity of love, to deny that he was worthy of anyone’s love, much less Colton’s. His heart broke just a little every time he was forced to see how hard it was for the man he loved to accept how truly lovable he was, but then his heart would soar when Jagger was victorious. Eyes so blue that they reminded him of the aquamarine waters off the island of Half Moon Cay looked at him and Colton felt his heart tumble inside his chest. It’d always been Jagger, it would always be Jagger. He’d loved this man since childhood.

  “You don’t have to worry, then. They both belong to you.” Jagger said. His gaze was shy and bold at the same time.

  “They’d better,” Colton growled possessively and then yanked Jagger down for a kiss. Their tongues danced, sparred, danced a little more, and then melted together. Each time they were together, every gentle caress or fiery fuck, Jagger grew more confident and aggressive, and Colton loved every damned minute of the sexual exploration his lover was undergoing. Having always been comfortable with his desire for other men, Colton had explored sex when he was young and he’d done it often. Jagger, never comfortable in anything in his life, had lived what Colton referred to as a monk’s existence. Sure, there’d been sex with women in Jagger’s past but to hear Jagger talk about it, it was more like something he did to not stand out in the crowd instead of something he enjoyed. Colton was his first male lover and he damned well intended to be the last, as well. He wanted to put a ring on it and he wanted to do it really fucking soon.

  ****

  When their lips parted, Jagger eased back and nibbled his bottom lip and then swiped his tongue across the spot, loving that he tasted Colton. Every inch of him felt burning hot and itchy as his desire for Colton threatened to consume him, just like it always did. The hard muscles beneath him felt perfect, like Colton’s body had been made just for him…just for his pleasure. While they’d been kissing, the cock he was sitting on had hardened and grown several inches and it was all he could do not to move his hips in a small thrust that would bring both of them so much pleasure.

  That would come later.

  He smiled down at Colton, loving the power he held over the man beneath him…the man that demanded he hand his heart over when he’d been terrified of the thoughts of allowing another person to have that much control over him. For years, he’d lived life in a protective ice shell, refusing to allow another person inside. There hadn’t been a doubt in his mind that losing his heart would mean losing everything he’d worked so hard to achieve. The independence he’d craved should’ve meant more than the loneliness that accompanied it, and it had…until Colton. Then, when he’d least expected it, that damned rich boy with the green eyes and wicked mouth, waltzed into his world and knocked him flat on his ass.

  He’d like to tell himself that he put up a good fight—a valiant effort to protect himself from Colton’s charms but if he was going to be honest, he’d have to admit he’d crumbled like a week-old cookie. Colton only needed to whisper a few sweet nothings in his ear and mold his hard muscles against him and Jagger was swooning in flat out record time. Yeah, a twenty-four hour date ended up costing him his heart and soul…and he didn’t want his feelings to ever change from where he was at this perfect moment.

  In bed with Colton.

  In Colton’s heart.

  It was where he belonged. No, things weren’t perfect – far from it, but they were getting closer and closer to perfection with every single passing day. Little by little, he was convincing Colton to ease up on the whole overprotecting—treat him like a delicate flower bullshit. Okay, it wasn’t exactly bullshit, he’d been and probably still was an insecure…delicate flower. Shit. He had to get past all the shit from his lone
ly childhood, stop allowing it to interfere with his decision-making process. He was so full of shit, it hadn’t been twenty-four hours since he’d been giving Landry a pep talk on trying to let go of the past and move forward and here he was—still allowing his past to steal time from his present.

  That bullshit stopped tonight.

  It wasn’t just him, either. He’d bet every dime he owned that Colton wouldn’t have ever taken one of his ex-boyfriends, ex-lovers, or ex-fuck buddies out of Landry’s club on opening night. Nosiree, he would’ve been right smackass there in the middle of all the debauchery, probably trying out some of the equipment. As it was, he’d ushered Jagger out of the club right when the night was about to turn into some raunchy fun. Nope. It wasn’t happening again. He didn’t need protecting. He didn’t need sheltering. Hell, there were times when he even wondered if Colton was holding back in the bedroom out of fear that he might break him if he fucked him too hard. He didn’t want Colton holding back on anything, especially in the bedroom. If he didn’t like something, he’d tell him. It wasn’t as if he was trying to become something he wasn’t…he was just trying to figure out what he was.

  He frowned, trying to figure out the best way to handle such a delicate situation. He didn’t want to pressure Colton into something he didn’t want but he also didn’t want to hold Colton back. He didn’t want to ask for too much—more than he could handle. On the other hand, he didn’t want to ask for not enough. Fuck, this was hard for him. The whole feelings thing fucked with his head every time.

  “Hey, babe,” Colton whispered as he placed a hand on the back of Jagger’s neck and massaged gently. “What’s wrong?”

  Jagger squinted down at him in confusion. “What do you mean?” He wiggled his ass against Colton’s cock and smiled. “Nothing feels wrong to me. As a matter of fact, it feels really right.” He blushed when he said it, but there he was, stepping out of his comfort zone. It wasn’t so bad. Actually, it felt kinda nice. The cock beneath him felt really nice and that helped him be brave. It was still amazing to realize how far he’d climbed out of his ice cave of emotions in less than a year. Not one time since he’d walked away from his dream job in Kentucky to join Colton in Key West had he even thought about cutting himself. The scars on his heart and body had started to fade into nothing more than a reminder of where he’d been, where he was going, and how strong he was for surviving.

  Colton chuckled softly…after the breath returned to his lungs following Jagger’s ass wiggle. “No, there’s definitely nothing wrong with this.” He squeezed Jagger’s ass again. “It’s about as fucking perfect as humanly possible—all firm and rounded, made to my exact fantasy specifications by the Man above. I was referring to the frown on your face. You were studying awfully hard on something, Wildcat. What was it?”

  Jagger chewed his bottom lip, trying to come up with a diplomatic way to tell Colton he was treating him a little too much like a china doll instead of a lover. Hell, there wasn’t an easy way, for all he knew, he was a china doll. He’d never been with another man, or tried different things. Maybe he was completely, one hundred percent, bona fide vanilla.

  Maybe he wasn’t.

  “I…I was thinking that I really wasn’t ready to leave the club tonight.” Shit, he even sounded wimpy. Colton would pick up on that, for sure. Yep, a tiny frown crinkled the spot between Colton’s eyes. Jagger immediately went into a full retreat. “There was still a lot of paperwork that I needed to take care of.” He tried for a smile, but probably failed miserably. “You know I have to keep a close eye on every dime or Landry will be redecorating the club before the first real customer sees the old décor.”

  This time, Colton’s eyes narrowed as he studied Jagger’s blushing face. Jagger wondered if Colton knew he wasn’t being completely honest. The paperwork deal was complete bullshit, of course. A herd of wild animals wouldn’t have been able to tear Jagger away from his job if he hadn’t had everything complete and filed to a level of perfection that Colton couldn’t even begin to try and comprehend.

  He could feel a blush painting his high cheekbones. A BDSM club.

  Well, shit. He was ready to stop being Colton’s kitty and be a tomcat. Jagger wasn’t sure he was ready for Landry’s hardcore club, regardless of how sexy all the props looked or how tantalizing the staff looked in their skimpy leather attire. Jagger’s life had been tough and even though everything, besides house hunting, seemed perfect between the two of them, he wasn’t ready to rock the boat…or scare Jagger into running again. Some folks insinuated that Colton might have been a bit of a bully when he’d been trying to win Jagger over so he knew Colton was trying to walk the straight and narrow with his lover. Jagger was much more subdued than he and his other friends were, and Colton said it was fine – he said he could learn to adapt to a more conservative lifestyle. He told Jagger he was worth any and all changes that he might need to make in his life and if it turned out that he needed to find him another job, away from Landry’s fun den of sin, he would do that too. Colton’s biggest fear, Jagger thought, was that he was only trying to change to fit the image he thought Colton wanted him to be.

  “Paperwork, eh?” he asked as he looked up and into Jagger’s eyes. Jagger knew his blush was still present but he met Colton him gaze to gaze. There’d been a time not too long ago that Jagger wouldn’t have been able to look him directly in the eye when discussing anything that made him uncomfortable. Jagger lived his life in flight instead of fight mode and it was tough to step out of that shadow. “Are you sure that’s what we’re talking about? Because I have a hard time imagining you leaving anything undone on that clutterfree desk of yours. Is there something else you aren’t telling me?”

  Jagger huffed out a frustrated breath, frowned, and then decided to just plow ahead. “I wanted to stick around…see what happens with all that sex stuff I see each and every day.” He felt himself blushing from head to toe. “There, I admitted it. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

  Colton’s features immediately softened. “Easy, Wildcat,” he said. “I only wanted to hear the truth. Sometimes the path your mind takes is filled with landmines and I’m trying to avoid stepping on one of them.” He cupped Jagger’s face between his hands. “I’m so fucking afraid of doing something wrong with you, babe. I worry. Constantly. Am I being too pushy? Am I not being pushy enough? Am I loving you too much? Am I not loving you enough? I know you struggle with issues stemming from your childhood and you have battles to fight every day but you need to understand that I struggle too. I love you so much and I’ll be damned if I let my overbearing arrogance fuck this up.”

  Jagger lowered his upper body until his head rested on Colton’s chest. The thump, thump, thump of his lover’s heart settled the racing of his own. Never in his life had he imagined he would feel so cherished and loved…so much a part of another person’s life. On one hand, it felt fucking wonderful, everything Hallmark movies were made of, but on the other hand, he knew he didn’t belong on a pedestal. Far, far from it, but that’s exactly where Colton had him positioned. His heart ached to know that the carefree and confident Colton was being knocked off balance because of him. He also knew that if he lived on a pedestal in Colton’s mind, there was only one way to go…down.

  “You are overbearingly arrogant,” he said softly.

  “We’ve already established that,” Colton growled playfully. “No need to rub it in my face.” He took a deep breath and opened his mouth to apologize but Jagger cut him off.

  “But since I love everything about you, I love the arrogance, too.” With his head resting on Colton’s chest, he didn’t have to look him in the eyes—making this talk much easier. Hell, who was he fooling? This wasn’t going to be easy no matter what. Serious discussions always made him uncomfortable. Learning to share his feelings with another person turned out to be one of his hardest transitions. He wasn’t used to sharing…or caring. “Sure, I want to punch you in the face a little bit over half the time, but the other forty perce
nt is pretty damned good.”

  When Colton’s palm landed with a loud smack against his ass, Jagger jerked in surprise and there was a pretty good chance that he might have yelped—not in pain but in shock. In the silence that followed the one smack spanking, Jagger took the few seconds to catalog what he was feeling. Shock, of course. A little bit of a burn on his bum. Arousal? Check. Embarrassment from the arousal? Double check. Shit, all of Landry’s BDSM shit was messing with his head…making him consider things he would never have considered before.

  “You okay?” Colton asked quickly, his sexy voice laced with concern. “I was just messing with you, babe. I won’t do it…”

  “Shut up, Colton,” Jagger interrupted. “Give me a second to register all the signals my ass is sending to my head, okay?” He raised his head to look at Colton, realizing he needed to look into his eyes instead of pulling off his usual hiding routine. A few more seconds passed before he was ready to continue…a few more seconds of noticing his dick had gotten really hard when Colton’s hand made contact with his ass. “See, Colton? We have a problem,” he said softly, his eyes locked with Colton’s moss green gaze.

  “It’s no problem, babe,” Colton interrupted. “I was just having some fun. It won’t happen again.”

  “That’s the problem,” Jagger said, his tone sharper than he intended but he still refused to backpedal. They needed to have this conversation. “You were having some fun but all of a sudden, you’re ready to swear to never smack my ass again. That’s bullshit. You can’t…not be yourself, Colton. I want the real you. I want what you’ve given every guy before me.” He paused, uncomfortable with not only how that sounded but by how crappy it made him feel. Imagining Colton with other guys left him feeling like he’d washed his mouth out with piss. Colton was his. “I…I just want to be the last one you give it to,” he corrected.