American Fairytale (Dreamers)

by Adriana Herrera

  “I can take you guys there today. It would be my pleasure to give her a tour.” His cordial, “all business” tone was even more concerning than the weary one before, because this sounded like a different person.

  “You know what, mi amor? We can just do it at another time.” I forced myself to come up with a lighter tone. “The shelter isn’t going anywhere,” I said, hating myself for starting this shit.

  “Don’t be silly, Tom. I just need to let the shelter managers know we’re coming, so they can get ready. What time works for you?”

  I cleared my throat, but when I spoke I sounded off. “She’s taking Libe out to get mani/pedis or something after school.”

  “I bet my boo’s excited for that.” For the first time in the conversation, I felt like I was talking to Camilo.

  “You know how she is,” I said with a real smile on my lips this time.

  Camilo exhaled, but he sounded better. “I feel like I’m talking to my long-distance boyfriend. I miss you, baby.” I shuddered, feeling the same need deep in my gut.

  “And I miss you.” There was no hiding the bone deep want in my voice.

  “Why don’t you guys come around eleven a.m., I’ll let you know where to go.” He was back to business, but the tone changed, we were us again.

  “Also...we need to keep things professional between us.” He sounded a little mortified, and I rushed to let him know he did not need to worry.

  “I understand, whatever you need, mi amor.” Simple as that. “I totally get it. Thanks for doing this, mi vida.”

  As I ended the call I reminded myself once again this was temporary, if I could just be patient and let Camilo do what he needed to do for his mother, we’d have forever waiting on the other side.

  * * *

  “You look at him like he’s water after a long day in the sun, m’ijo.”

  I shook my head at my mother and her mushiness, my eyes still zeroed in on Camilo.

  “Behave, Mamí, remember—”

  She chuckled, squeezing my elbow. “I know, no ‘boyfriend’ talk, I’m aware that you went and got yourself caught up in a secret affair.” Her eyes twinkled when she looked at me. “This man keeps bringing out new sides of you.” She shot me the look that was usually followed by some kind of anecdote illustrating how I was a perfect child.

  “You were always so self-contained, not a word out of place, but fierce.” She ran a hand over my shoulder, her eyes on Camilo as he approached. “You were always impatient when it came to going after what you wanted. I’m glad someone is finally making you wait.”

  I pursed my lips at my mom’s smug expression. “Not nice, Mami.” She just laughed, tipping her chin at the object of our conversation.

  I straightened as Camilo got closer, my body primed to take him in my arms, kiss him. Look him over to see how he was doing. Since we were standing across the street from his place of work, I extended a hand to him instead.

  “Camilo, good to see you.” He looked frayed, but his smile was warm, and he stood just a bit closer than necessary.

  “Tom,” he said gripping my hand, then turned to look at my mother. “Señora Gomez. ¿Come esta?”

  She waved his hand away and went in for a tight hug and a kiss right there on the busy sidewalk, then told him in a low voice, “Please call me Esperanza. I’ve been wanting to meet the man who’s made my son so happy in the last few months.”

  “Mamí,” I protested.

  She turned her head up to look at me and whispered. “I know. I can’t make a fuss. I just wanted to give him a proper hello, m’ijo.”

  She stepped back from him but kept his hand in hers. I looked down at him and saw the emotion on his face, he still hadn’t spoken and his lip quivered. I knew he was working hard on keeping it together. I would’ve given anything to be able to hold him. To have a redo.

  I should’ve known with how close Camilo was to his mother, meeting mine would be monumental. We should’ve been somewhere he could’ve been himself with her, where they could talk and hit it off like I knew they would. Instead we were on a sidewalk acting like we didn’t know each other.

  Finally, he pulled her hand and went in for a second hug. “It’s so good to meet you too, Esperanza.”

  After a moment they separated and my mom gave me a sympathetic look as I stood stoically to the side unable to touch him.

  Camilo seemed better though, his eyes looked less worn. He pointed a finger to the west. “We’re walking in that direction.” With that he started walking with us close behind. He glanced up at me, giving me a small smile. “I got the confidentiality agreements you guys sent me this morning, thank you for that.”

  “Of course.”

  He lifted a shoulder as we crossed the street. “Some people feel weird about it, but we need to make sure anyone going to the shelter knows they can’t disclose the location or names of the people staying there. The safety of our clients is the most important thing.”

  My mom nodded in agreement, and moved closer to Camilo. “I completely understand. You don’t know how I wish my sister could have found a place like New Beginning when she was here.”

  Camilo put an arm around her shoulder. “I know.” He looked up at me then, his face serious but so full of affection. “What your son is doing in her memory is amazing though. We will be able to help many more, for a long time, thanks to what he’s doing.”

  “He’s a good man.” My mother never could miss an opportunity to brag about her sons.

  This time when Camilo looked at me, I could see all his love there openly on display. “He’s the best man.”

  My mom laughed at us and the lovesick faces we were probably making. “Ay Dios mio, cuanto amor.”

  I didn’t have the energy to feel embarrassed, and when I opened my mouth I did it looking right into Camilo’s eyes. “Todo el amor.”

  It was the honest truth, he had all my love.

  Camilo said nothing, but I could see the tension in his shoulders had relaxed somewhat. After a couple of minutes of walking in silence, Camilo hurried up the sidewalk to an unmarked building and tapped a code on a panel by the entrance. The door opened and we walked into a small lobby. He gestured toward the well-lit and freshly painted area, where a shiny gold-plated plaque had been installed on one of the walls.

  “Welcome to ‘Patria’s House.’”

  My mother let out a startled sob when she saw my aunt’s name, and Camilo and I each took one of her hands. When he spoke his voice was gentle.

  “Do you need a minute, Esperanza? Take your time.”

  She shook her head, her emotions all over her face. “I’m ready.”

  He gave me a sympathetic look and went to push the elevator button.

  “We can start on one of the residential floors and finish where we have the communal areas,” he said clearly excited to show us around. “As you know, part of the renovation was to expand the living areas, so now we can shelter more clients. We also fully renovated the kitchen and the wellness center is beautiful.” It was hard to tell who was glowing more between Camilo and my mom as he told us about the shelter.

  As we stepped in he kept speaking to my mom in Spanish, while she held his hand tightly, hanging on his every word. “We now have three apartments that can lodge families. So, if we have a parent who is coming with children we can put them in their own space. We also have two small studios, for anyone who needs to be in their own private room.”

  We stepped out of the elevator into a colorful hallway. The walls were painted a light blue and each door was a different color. Each room had a plaque with a name. Camilo came to a stop in front of a yellow door that had a small sign with hand painted sunflowers. After a moment a woman opened the door. She smiled as soon as she saw Camilo.

  “Buenos dias.”

  “Hey,” he told her warmly. “We came to see your p
lace if that’s okay.”

  “Claro.” She stepped to the side to let us in.” It was one of the studios and everything looked brand-new. There were some photos on a corkboard on the wall that looked like they’d been pinned on by the resident. I saw there was a baby in a pack and play in the middle of the room. As soon as he saw Camilo, he started bouncing up and down.

  His face lit up and he went over to the baby. “Hey, bud,” he said bending down to pick him up. Once the baby was comfortably on his hip he walked over to the woman, who was still looking a little shy.

  “Nancy, this is Mr. Hughes and Mrs. Gomez. They are the visitors Mercedes told you about. They helped us with the improvements to the house.”

  Her face lit up at that and she came to shake both our hands. “Gracias. This place is such a blessing. It saved me and my baby.” Her voice trembled as Camilo proudly looked on.

  As I shook her hand I heard Camilo talk to her, his voice fierce. “You saved yourself, Nancy, we were just here to catch you.” She had a rueful smile on her lips, but she gave him a sharp nod.

  In that moment I felt the proudest I’d ever been of what I had been able to accomplish in this country. To have even a small part of helping survivors get to safety was a dream I’d harbored for years. And to be able to share that with my mother and Camilo felt like an enormous blessing.

  “You’re welcome, Nancy,” I told her sincerely. I looked at Camilo then, and I could see he understood exactly what I was feeling. “I am so grateful I could help.”

  After that we took a tour through the rest of the building. In addition to the wellness center, with the renovation they’d built a new computer room, a child-care area and a few consultation rooms which were used to provide therapy to the adults and children by licensed clinicians. Just being able to have my mom here seeing what we were able to do was monumental. That combined with seeing Camilo in his element, the way the staff clearly respected and loved him was a beautiful thing.

  My mom was chatting with the child therapist when I took a chance to pull Camilo aside, and asked as casually as I could manage, “Can we talk in private?”

  He tensed for a moment, but then nodded, gesturing to the door across the hall. “Mercedes, I’m going to take Mr. Hughes in to my office for a minute, we’ll be right back.”

  The therapist nodded, seemingly caught up in whatever she was telling my mother. My mom, of course, shooed us away with a knowing look. I wasn’t even sure what I was after, other than I needed a moment alone with him.

  He invited me into a small neat office, which I stepped into, and waited until he had closed the door. He leaned against it, and stood there looking at me with tired eyes. His hands at his side.

  “You look so tired, mi amor.” He just shrugged in his typical “what else is new” gesture.

  I walked up to him, not sure how he would receive this breach to his request, but when I gathered him in my arms, his body sunk into me.

  “I’m tired and I missed you,” he said, his cheek pressed to my chest.

  “Thanks for doing this for us, my mom loved it, and you.”

  He looked up. “It was good to meet her too.” He smiled as he ran his hands over my shoulders possessively, as if making sure his property was all in working order. “You look like her. Same nose and eyes.”

  I groaned in answer as I pressed against him and bent down for a kiss, just a small touching of lips.

  “I love seeing you here in your element. I can’t tell you how much it meant to me, to be able to do this and you be the one to carry out this wish. Baby—”

  I wanted to beg him once again to let me take care of everything, to give him whatever he needed, but instead I said what I knew wouldn’t turn into another argument. “Can you come to lunch with my mom and me?” I asked as he laid his head on my chest.

  He looked up and he didn’t have to answer. I could read the “no” in his eyes. “I can’t. I have so much to do today.” He looked miserable, and I felt terrible for pressing him after I’d already made him rearrange his day for this visit.

  “I really want to. I’d love to hang out with your mom a bit more, but this week is crazy and we’re so close to the opening. I just can’t. I’m sorry.”

  He looked like he was about to fall apart. So, I let it go. I kissed him again and then lifted his chin so he would look at me. “Promise me you’ll get some rest soon. I’m worried about you. I never see you and when I do, you look like you can barely stand.”

  I braced for a bristled remark, but he just nodded and responded with a barely audible “okay,” and the fact that he didn’t even have the energy to fight me on this, felt like the last straw.

  He opened the door and looked up at me. “We should go back to get your mom.” Those gray eyes that usually lit me up, were dimmed today, they’d been that way for too long.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Camilo

  I was fucking exhausted. I’d been working eighteen hour days for the last two weeks between work and the freelance translations, and I was feeling close to the breaking point. Since Tom’s mom came for a visit, things had gotten even more hectic with the dedication ceremony.

  I was constantly running on fumes and it was starting to cause a real strain between Tom and me. A couple of days ago when I’d shown up late for a cookie baking date with Libe, Tom asked again if he could help. When I declined, again, for the first time he actually insisted and said he couldn’t just watch me run myself into the ground, that it was affecting our relationship. He was right, but I still couldn’t bring myself to agree. But this week had me so wrung out I was starting to consider it.

  My mom had been off for six weeks now and had two more to go and I felt very proud of myself and her for being able to give her this time, even with how rough it’d been. Still, I worried about what would happen once she went back to work. I even suggested moving back in with her for a while until she found something different, but she’d vetoed that instantly. It was also hard talking to Tom about it, because all he wanted was to pull out his wallet, and I was tired of having the same argument.

  The only thing keeping me together at the end of this long ass week was the fact that I finally had a weekend off. I was on my way to Tom’s place and the plan was for me to stay until Sunday. It’d been weeks since I’d had a weekend when I didn’t have extra work to do, and I was so looking forward to some alone time with Tom.

  I also still felt guilty about barely spending any time with his mom when she was in town. He hadn’t brought it up, but I knew he’d been upset.

  I was running up the stairs of the subway station close to his place, when I got a call. I was surprised when I saw the screen. It was almost 6:30 p.m. on a Friday. A call from my mom’s property management office could not be about anything good.

  I tried to keep most of the exasperation out of my voice when I answered. “Hello.”

  “Hi, Camilo, this is Cindy. I tried to call your mom, but she’s not answering.” The friendly tone in her voice set all my alarms blaring.

  “She’s at her Zumba class tonight. She probably shut off the phone,” I said feeling proud of myself for not cursing her out.

  “Oh okay, well I’ll just leave the message with you then.” I’d been dealing with this woman for the last two months and had never heard her sound this perky. “I just wanted to let her know she’s all set. We received the payment for all of her arrears, and for the next six months of rent.”

  I had to stop and stand to the side on the street, so I could ask her again what the hell she was talking about. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure I follow. What do you mean she’s all set? Did my mom come to pay or something?” There was a chance she could’ve borrowed from Odette, but I doubted she had fifteen grand in cash to lend my mom.

  “Oh no, the payment came from the office of Thomas Hughes. His assistant called this morning and they wired
it to our bank this afternoon. They were very prompt, and easy to deal with.”

  I had to be hearing wrong.

  “Listen, Camilo, I’m sorry to cut you off, but we’re about to close the office, so I have to go. Have a great weekend.”

  Funny how happy she sounded now that she’d gotten her money.

  I stood there on the street stunned into silence. A few minutes passed before I started walking again, and getting pissed with every step I took to Tom’s house.

  How fucking dare he?

  I couldn’t believe Tom had done this shit again. After I’d specifically told him, a million fucking times, I didn’t need him to pay for my mom’s expenses, he went and did it anyway.

  I got to his house within a few minutes and by the time he opened the door, I was in a righteous rage. I felt completely betrayed and disrespected.

  I couldn’t even look at him. He was about to go in for a kiss, but I slunk away from him. Then he tried to lean in again, but took a step back when he saw my face. I wanted to scream at him right there on the street, but before I made a scene I walked into the house. I didn’t even bother to take off my backpack.

  I was not staying in this house for long.

  “What’s wrong?”

  I scoffed at his question and stepped closer to where he was standing all loose limbed, like he didn’t know what he’d done.

  “You’re really asking me that right now, Tom?”

  I could tell he was trying to gauge just how mad he’d made me, but when he opened his mouth I knew he had seriously fucking miscalculated.

  “Is this about the rent?”

  My head felt so hot I was worried I would give myself a stroke just from what I was having to do not to get in his face.

  “The rent?” I asked making air quotes. “It’s not about ‘the rent,’ Tom. It’s about you paying fifteen thousand dollars for my mother’s housing without my consent. Behind my back.” I was keeping my voice barely below screaming, while he just stood there with his lips pursued. The calmer he looked the hotter I got.