Roderick blinked and did as he was told. He let out a bittersweet smile, all the time wondering if the babies he and Jane had lost were girls. He would have loved a daughter just like Gabby. Were they in heaven now looking down at him?
Enough, he thought angrily. If he kept thinking with his heart and not his brain, he could destroy the most precious thing to him in the entire world.
He gripped the teacup so tightly it slipped from his hand.
Gabby looked up, scowling. “That could happen when you are taking tea with the king and you would be very em...embarr…”
“Embarrassed,” he said for her.
“That’s it,” she said smiling. “Did you know that God doesn’t get embarrassed?”
“I suppose He doesn’t.”
Roderick smiled back, wondering if God was listening to this silly conversation.
He pondered the thought and decided a simple prayer couldn’t hurt. Lord, I don’t understand everything You do, but if You could keep Jane safe—
“It looks like you had an accident,” Gabby cried.
He dropped his gaze and scowled. His pants were spotted with lemonade from his tipped teacup.
Gabby sighed. “It’s quite all right. Go upstairs and change your clothes. Everything will be fine. I won’t tell anyone, not even Richard.” Gabby shooed him away. “Go. Go.”
Roderick stood and started upstairs. Hell’s bells, the girl was sounding like her mother every day.
Cold air swirled inside the coach, sending a shiver down Jane’s spine as she sat beside Agatha while they waited for Emily and Jared to join them for the drive to the Paxton Ball. It seemed the earl and his wife were having a bit of trouble with their children. The nanny was ill, and instead of finding their children sleeping in the nursery, they had discovered Gabby, clad in one of Emily’s favorite gowns, downstairs, having a tea party with her brother and Mr. Picklehammer.
Jane felt her heart squeeze. If children and tea parties were her only worry, she would be delighted.
With a shudder, she drew a silver shawl around her shoulders, then proceeded to unfold the napkin resting in her lap and pop a small lemon cake into her mouth. The sweet taste seemed to soothe her. The past month, she found she had to eat more between meals to fill her hunger.
She gazed at her gown and frowned. The dressmaker had said the sky blue had matched her eyes, and that no man would be able to resist her when she put it on, especially her husband. How wrong she was!
But it mattered not. Jane was so furious with Roderick right now, she didn’t want to have a thing to do with him!
“I think we smell wonderful,” Agatha announced, her voice quite cheerful. “Don’t you think so, my dear?”
Jane chuckled. The scent of French perfume permeated the air. “I believe we smell delicious.”
Agatha had brought the expensive fragrance home from her travels, and at the lady’s insistence, they both had dabbed a drop or two behind their ears.
Agatha let out a childish giggle. “I hear it’s a love potion. However, I doubt I shall lure anyone into a corner for a kiss. But I must say, I do enjoy the smell.”
A love potion? Jane thought she could use something like that right now. That is, if she weren’t so upset with her husband.
She let out a shaky smile and stared into the night. A full moon hung in the sky, lighting the streets. Shadows fell along the walks. The carriage lanterns added to the eerie effect.
“Oh, Agatha,” she sighed. “I don’t think he loves me anymore.”
Agatha took her arm. “What’s this? Of course Roderick loves you.”
“But I’m fat,” she whispered. “Roderick thinks so, and he believes I should see a doctor about my eating habits.”
“Humph! That’s ridiculous. A mother with child always eats odd things at odd times. Oh, Jane, you didn’t tell him about the baby, did you?”
“No.” Her voice cracked. “You don’t understand. Roderick doesn’t love me anymore. How could I tell him about the baby when he feels like that?”
“Pish posh. That man adores you, and everyone knows it.”
Jane couldn’t deny the facts any longer. After the loss of the last baby, nothing had ever been the same. A sharp pain pierced her heart when she thought about Roderick’s chilling words in her bedchambers.
“You’re wrong,” she said softly, not able to look at Agatha. “You heard how he keeps his distance from me. Ask anyone at the ball.” She managed a bitter laugh. “And you heard the ladies in the Pump Room today. They know all is not right with my marriage. I can no longer hide it.”
Agatha straightened and grabbed her parasol. “La, I have been out of the country too long! I should have boxed Roderick’s ears when I saw him earlier.”
Jane let out a sad chuckle and rested her head on Agatha’s shoulder. “I do love you so.”
The parasol struck the floor. “How dare Roderick scold you for being fat! You are with child. The addlepated ninny should have figured that out, even if you did not tell him.”
Jane looked up and smiled. “It’s not that simple.”
Another thwack. “Confound that man! I shall have more than a word with him, duke or not.”
“He doesn’t love me anymore,” she repeated to Agatha, as her mind tried to come to terms with her situation. “That’s the plain truth of the matter.”
Agatha’s parasol slapped the side of the carriage. “If that’s true, I’m Napoleon Bonaparte!”
Jane frowned. “You must promise me you won’t speak of our conversation to Roderick. Not of the baby or anything.”
Agatha’s lips thinned. “It sounds like trouble.”
“Agatha?”
“Oh, very well. But as long as I mentioned trouble, I must ask you about Captain Argyle. Your friendship with the man has obviously started rumors.”
Jane gasped in outrage. “Captain—”
Agatha put up her hand. “Now, now, hear me out. Because of those rumors, Roderick’s friendship with the man is no longer. I am only saying this for your own good. Perhaps it would be best if you stay away from the captain…just for appearance sake, my dear.” Agatha sighed. “ I hate to say it, but men are fickle creatures when it comes to their women.”
Jane pinched her lips, trying to hold back her anger. “I will not cut ties with him.” She put a protective hand to her stomach. “Captain Argyle has saved this baby. He is everything good. I have no designs on him, and that is that!”
Agatha’s eyes widened. “Good gracious! Saved the baby? Well, now, my dear, that is something you will definitely need to explain. To me and to Roderick.”
Jane shrugged, turning her gaze back to the window. “After I lost the baby last month, I realized something was not quite right. When the doctor returned a few days later to check on me, he was quite startled to realize I was still carrying a child. The twin I told you about.”
“And why was Roderick not told of this right away?” Agatha asked in an aggravated tone.
Jane clasped her hands together. “The doctor was going on tour with Lord Bashford’s son. They left the country the very next day.”
“That still does not answer my question.”
Jane sighed, shifting a guilty gaze back toward Agatha. “The doctor assumed Roderick knew. Everything happened so fast. Besides, I was going to tell Roderick the news. But when I overheard one of the maids talking about her megrims that were cured by one of Captain Argyle’s servants, I hesitated.”
Agatha tapped her parasol lightly against the seat. “I fail to see the direction of this conversation, Jane.”
“The point is, the captain’s servant was educated in a different type of medicine that comes from China.”
Agatha looked on impatiently. “And?”
“Well,” Jane continued. “After a few questions, I discovered the servant used herbs and other treatments for many other ailments. In fact, it seems that some of the servants from many of the surrounding households use her instead of a doctor.�
�
Agatha gasped. “Do not tell me you have been using the captain’s servant instead of a doctor?”
Jane shrugged. “A different doctor has been coming to the house too. The man believes Roderick knows about the baby, and I have not corrected him. If future conversations arise with Roderick and him, I have asked the doctor to keep quiet about the situation because of our painful past with the other babies.”
She bit her bottom lip, knowing she had not been quite honest with either her husband or the doctor. But she had her reasons. Her baby came first. “So yes, Roderick knows a doctor comes to see me now and then,” she added, coloring.
“Good gracious,” Agatha muttered. “You are in essence telling me that Roderick believes the doctor is visiting for your health, but has no idea the man is there because of the baby?”
“Exactly,” Jane said with a heartfelt sigh. “It is quite a mess, I daresay.”
Agatha stared at the front door of the Bath home, as if bracing herself for Roderick to come storming outside, demanding an explanation.
Frowning, Agatha turned back to Jane. “You are walking a fine line, my dear. Sooner or later, one of those men will figure it out. Besides, what would the captain’s servant know about delivering a baby? Goodness, she is just hired help! What is her education? Can she even read? Oh, mercy, I cannot believe this. This vexes me to no end. No end, I tell you.”
Jane grabbed Agatha’s hands in a comforting hold. “Now, dearest, you must not fret. Mrs. Hobbs is married and has three children of her own. She lived in China for many years.”
“I have heard about such things, but it doesn’t mean I like it.”
“Chinese Medicine is not new. They have been practicing it on the other side of the world for thousands of years. There are herbs and other treatments that help certain conditions. I don’t understand it all. But Mrs. Hobbs has helped many babies come into this world when their mothers have lost ones before that.”
Agatha turned red in the face. “But…well...my goodness…I just don’t know. What if it her treatments or herbs hurt the baby? Tell me that!”
Jane smiled. “I trust Mrs. Hobbs. I lost too many babies with those London doctors. I know they were doing everything in their power to help me, but it wasn’t enough. I had a feeling this was the right thing to do. I sought out Captain Argyle, and he has allowed Mrs. Hobbs to help me.”
Agatha’s lips twisted. “Hmmm. And no one is the wiser, I presume? What about this new doctor? What does he think of all this…this, well, good gracious, I don’t even know what to call it!”
Jane set her chin. “He doesn’t know. And I am not going to tell him.”
“I see,” Agatha replied stiffly. “Then the captain is your liaison for this Mrs. Hobbs. Am I correct?”
Jane nodded. “He has been everything agreeable. It is my secret to tell, not his.”
“The captain is too kind for his own good,” Agatha snapped. “And Roderick is not pleased that you have any relationship with the captain at all. So if you think Roderick will let you to continue to see this Mrs. Hobbs, you have another thing coming, my girl.”
Jane fidgeted with her shawl. “I wanted to tell him many times, but the man is so pigheaded, he won’t let me get in a word.”
“Frankly, I believe you are holding back because you fear he won’t allow you to continue seeing the woman,” Agatha replied in a cool voice. “He is a duke and thinks himself quite important. Not that he doesn’t have any good qualities, my dear. He does. But having that kind of power does go to one’s head. And when Roderick makes a decision, it is almost impossible to turn that man around.”
Jane clasped her stomach protectively with both hands. “This baby will live. And I will do anything in my power to see that it does. I believe with all my heart that Mrs. Hobbs has helped me get this far.”
She looked up, her eyes brimming with tears. “I won’t let him interfere, Agatha. I won’t! I don’t care what anyone thinks of me. I am going to have this baby, and I’m going to do it my way. This is a life we are talking about. A little human life. No one is going to tell me what to do. Not even Roderick.”
“Oh?” Agatha replied, her eyes twinkling. “How do you plan to hide your girth then?”
Jane threw her hands in the air. “I intend to tell him. Sometime. And if, well, if he disagrees on the matter, I simply shall stay with you at Hemmingly Hall and plead with the captain to send Mrs. Hobbs to us. The captain may even rent a place nearby if need be, because it seems Mrs. Hobbs has become indispensable to many of his servants. In fact, I have spoken to the captain about the very possibility already.”
Agatha burst out laughing. “Goodness, I may be able to work at some things, but you traveling to Hemmingly Hall with Captain Argyle settling in a nearby home? That is something I believe Roderick will put a stop to.”
Jane scowled. “I don’t—”
Jane choked on her words when the door swung open and Roderick stood before her. Broad shoulders blocked the doorway, making her heart skip. His black jacket, crisp white shirt and starched cravat made him quite appealing.
A range of emotions swept through her as his gray eyes clung to hers.
Within seconds, the scent of sandalwood soap and musky cologne weaved her way, reminding her all to clearly how he had rejected her love only hours ago.
That split second of hope instantly died. Their rift seemed bigger than both of them. And now, it involved a child. Their child.
Agatha bristled, shifting a worried gaze between them. “La, Roderick, you scared us half to death! I thought you were coming later?” The lady narrowed her eyes and raised her parasol across the doorway to block him.
A muscle ticked in Roderick’s jaw. “If I choose to enter, madam, you would not be able to stop me.”
Jane concealed her tumultuous emotions with a cool expression.
Agatha huffed. “You have caused enough heartache for tonight. Find another convenience, Your Grace. This one is full.”
Jane smirked at Agatha’s bravado. Roderick was a gentleman, and though they were not on good terms at the moment, Jane knew he would not push pass Agatha without her consent.
“Jane,” Roderick replied sharply.
Lifting her chin, Jane pulled her shawl tighter across her enlarging bosom and shifted her gaze toward the opposite window. She could not give in now. She had to have the upper hand. Her entire future depended on how she managed her husband from here on out.
With a muttered oath, Roderick brushed the parasol aside and squeezed his large body between Jane and Agatha.
Jane’s head jerked up.
“Truly, Your Grace!” Agatha squealed. “I find this most discomforting. Most discomforting indeed!
“I thought to travel to the ball with my wife,” Roderick announced in a determined tone. “Do you mind?”
“Yes, I do mind!” Agatha whacked him on the knee with her parasol.
“Ouch!” He jumped, making Jane smother a chuckle.
Indeed, he had surprised her by forcing his way in, but he should have known better than to have shoved that parasol aside.
“Madam,” he snapped, turning toward Agatha. “You have just hit a duke!”
“Do tell?” she responded politely. “I thought I struck an addlepated nincompoop! My apologies indeed, Your Grace.”
Jane couldn’t help but laugh. Roderick’s face had turned a deep red.
Agatha rose, reaching for the door. “I am only leaving because I believe you two having something to talk about. I shall catch another carriage with Emily and Jared.”
Jane’s heart raced with panic. “You do not have to leave!”
Agatha raised her brows. “I think I do. Tell him, my dear.”
Then, without warning, the lady poked her parasol into Roderick’s side.
He grunted, grabbing his ribs. “By Jove, you go too far, madam!”
Her light gray eyes glittered with warning. “You had better be on your best behavior or you will be sorry in
deed.” With a humph, the older lady closed the door and sent the carriage on its way.
Roderick glared at Jane. “I truly believes she wishes to do me harm.”
Jane shrugged. “You are not her favorite person at the moment.”
The clatter of carriage wheels echoed in the air as they rolled toward their destination a few blocks away. During the tense silence, Jane struggled to keep her emotions in check, but Roderick’s body was still scrunched against hers. The touch of his muscular leg brushing hers sent the blood rushing to her head.
“What do you have to tell me that is so important that Agatha would leave your side so swiftly?” he asked, turning to her.
She spun to face him. She had to confront him. Tell him. Be honest with him. It wasn’t in her to keep things from him. Besides, the strain of this secret was taking a toll on her. She knew the stress could not be good for the baby. “Do you know anything about medical treatments from China?”
Roderick’s black brow lifted in surprise. “I have heard there are herbs and different points on the body that are used to stimulate a healing process, but I have never indulged in such things.”
She swallowed, touching her stomach. “Well—”
He jerked, staring at her in horror. “Confound it! If you are thinking what I think you are thinking, let me tell you right now, I will not allow you to have any treatments that are not from a doctor. If you are feeling under the weather, I will have that doctor you have been seeing sent for straight away.”
She stiffened. How could he be so stubborn? “I don’t want a doctor. Captain Argyle has a lady who lived many years in China, and she—”
“Stop right there.”
“But if you would only listen—”
He put up a hand, cutting her off. “I knew you were feeling ill. That’s why you have been acting so disagreeable, is it not? I should have had a talk with that new doctor straight away.” He eyed the napkin and crumbs on the seat opposite her and frowned. “Perhaps it is what you are eating.”
Her eyes rounded in disbelief. If he only knew!
Roderick took her hands in his, almost reluctantly. “I think you should curtail some of the cakes you have been eating, sweetheart. Perhaps there has been too much fuss lately. After all, you have had a hard time of it the last month, after…well…you know…”
The Duke's Bride: Book 5 (The Clearbrooks) Page 6
