Embracing the Wolf

by Felicity Heaton

  His body twisted, bones popping out of place and clicking back into another position. Black wiry fur erupted across his skin. His ears elongated at the same time as his nose. Razor sharp canines replaced his teeth.

  Falling to his knees, he pressed his hands into the dusty concrete floor between the bars and stared wide-eyed at his claws as they extended and blackened. He couldn’t do this. He reared up onto his back legs and ripped his jeans apart, angered by their restrictive presence. He had to keep control. Kat needed him. He would not let her go through this horror too. He had to go to her. He had to protect her. He would not turn rogue.

  Snarling, he hunched down and shook all over as his body finally shifted completely into his werewolf guise.

  Throwing his head back, he howled out his rage.

  ***

  Kat jumped when the phone rang. She hopped across the room, still trying to get her left boot on, and grabbed it. Flipping the mobile phone open, she slammed her foot down into the boot at the same time.

  “Hello?”

  “Kat, it’s Paul.” He sounded out of breath. She frowned at the phone.

  “What’s up?” Picking up her other boot, she slipped her foot into it and bent to tie the laces, pressing the phone against her ear with her shoulder.

  “We’ve a new boy on the list.” He paused and there was a hint of hope in his voice when he next spoke. “You going to come out and hunt with me?”

  Her eyebrows rose and she straightened up, retrieving her phone from her shoulder. She knew that Paul hated the fact that she always hunted alone. It was understandable. It wasn’t as though she had offered him any explanation for her distance and she was supposed to be his partner. All the other teams in the unit hunted together.

  Of course, none of the other teams had a werewolf in hiding as one of the partners. At least, she didn’t know if they did.

  Kat finished tying her laces and then crossed the lounge to her coat, tugging her black shirt back into place as she walked.

  “Maybe,” she answered and slid her arms into the holster, switching her phone between hands. Her guns still felt heavy tonight.

  “You might want to come on this hunt.” His voice was ice.

  A shiver ran through her. In a quiet voice, she said, “Why?”

  “Apparently it’s the alpha of a pack that just moved into the neighbourhood.”

  Her heart picked up pace. A pack that had just moved in? It couldn’t be.

  “Amon,” he said without the slightest trace of emotion. “You knew him didn’t you?”

  Her stomach roiled and flipped. Staggering backwards, she grabbed the couch to steady herself. It was a fight to remain standing as her knees gave. She clung to the couch with tight trembling fingers and stared blankly at the carpet. It couldn’t be.

  Amon couldn’t have turned rogue.

  He would fight it. She knew in her heart that he wouldn’t give up without a fight. He wouldn’t let her slip into the darkness too. He wouldn’t.

  Kat’s heart levelled out again but a dull ache throbbed in its depths. She breathed slow and steady, calming herself. She had to move fast if she was going to help Amon. Now wasn’t the time to be frightened.

  It struck her that Paul had said ‘knew him’, as though Amon was already dead.

  Her eyes widened.

  “Paul?” Her voice shook with the cold fear stealing through her. He couldn’t have said ‘knew him’ for a reason. Paul wouldn’t have killed Amon and then called her. He couldn’t have. The whole world fell quiet. She listened hard, trying to hear the background noises at his end of the line, anything that could give her a clue. “Where are you?”

  A short laugh.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?” His tone held a distinct sneer and anger. “Maybe you should have been a better partner. You could’ve been here when he dies.”

  The line went dead.

  “Paul? Paul!” She tore the phone from her ear and stared at it. He’d said ‘dies’ not ‘dead’. Amon wasn’t dead yet. She clung to that thought as though it was her only hope.

  Christ, she prayed Leyton hadn’t changed his number. She punched it in and was running for the door as it rang. She didn’t lock the door behind her. There wasn’t time. She had to find Amon. One flight of stairs. Two. She shoved the front doors and broke out onto the street.

  The night air was cold without her jacket. A passing man stared at her. His eyes fell to her chest and then he backed away and crossed the road. Shit. Her guns were on show. If the police saw her, she’d be dead.

  The phone continued to ring.

  Damn Leyton.

  Taking deep breaths, she tried to calm down. If she was calm, she might be able to sense Amon. She closed her eyes and focussed. When nothing came to her, she realised that there was only one way of finding Amon.

  She needed to use her beast.

  She wouldn’t let it take control. She would just let it out a little so she could sense others like her.

  It lunged forwards, clearly sensing freedom and her desire to use it. Kat struggled to keep it to heel. She growled right along with it, frustrated and angry.

  It wanted Amon too. It wanted to mate. If it wanted him, it was going to have to help her find him.

  Nothing.

  She stomped her foot and then remembered what Amon had told her all those years ago. Many people made the mistake of thinking their werewolf side was a separate being locked within them. It wasn’t. It was part of them. She realised that she had always kept it separate, seeing it as a thing that had invaded her. It wasn’t. The animal inside her was her true nature. It was part of her. It was her.

  If she wanted to use that side of herself to find Amon, she would have to accept it was a part of her.

  She shook her head and pressed redial on her phone.

  She couldn’t do it.

  Not even to save Amon.

  She couldn’t embrace the werewolf.

  Still no answer.

  She tried Paul again, running at the same time, heading towards the cemetery. It was a good starting point. Amon might have gone back there to see her. If he had turned dangerous, then his focus now would be to feed and perhaps mate. The only place he’d seen her in this town was the cemetery. Surely, he would return there in the hopes of finding her.

  “Hello Kat.” Paul sounded calm. The kind of calm that psychopathic murderers did.

  Pressing her finger into her other ear to block out the ambient noise, she listened hard, trying to hear anything that would make it clear where he was.

  “I think I’ll hunt with you after all,” she said, out of breath as she sprinted. “Where shall I meet you?”

  There was a loud smacking sound and then a distinct growl. Paul laughed, low and vicious.

  “Down boy,” Paul said slightly away from the phone and her chest tightened, her heart clenching at the thought of him hurting Amon. “It’s too late to make amends, Kat. I gave you a chance.”

  “A chance?” Kat turned the corner that led onto a road running parallel to the main street of the city, away from the evening crowds. It was hard to talk and run, but she had to keep Paul on the phone. It was her only hope. If she could keep him talking, perhaps she would buy Amon some time. “A chance at what?”

  Another cracking sound. This time the growl was more of a whimper. Icy spears stabbed her heart.

  “You know, Kat, I always thought there was something different about you. I thought you were special,” Paul said, anger rolling off those words. God. All this time he’d wanted them to be more than partners. She hadn’t looked at a man since Amon. “Shit, I should’ve realised just how special you were.”

  What kind of special was he talking about now?

  “A freaking werewolf. I can’t believe you kept that hidden from me.”

  That kind of special.

  “Listen, Paul,” Kat said but he stopped her with another laugh, this one short and empty.

  “Don’t try to sweet talk me.” Paul gr
owled the words into the phone. Her eyes widened when she heard him cock his gun.

  She ran harder, lungs burning as she pushed past her limit. She had to get to them before he killed Amon.

  “I saw you with dog boy last night.”

  That explained the flip in Paul’s personality. They had hardly chosen a private place for their make out session and Amon had almost gone werewolf on her. Paul had probably stayed around after their talk to scout for the werewolf that had attacked in the area. He must have seen everything.

  Which led her to wonder whether Amon was really on the list, or whether Paul was doing this out of blind jealousy.

  “You want to say goodbye to him?”

  Those words were in strange stereo. She turned down an alley to see Paul stood with his side to her and Amon backed into a corner. Relief, sweet and sharp, filled her when she saw him. He stared at Paul with murder in his eyes, but she knew that he was still in control. His long coat obscured his body. At this distance, she couldn’t tell if he was hurt.

  “I take it that’s a no?” Paul said, still talking into the phone. He raised his gun and aimed straight at Amon’s head.

  Kat kept running, her steps light on the wet asphalt.

  Amon leaned into the wall. The shift in position brought his face into the light from the streetlamp on the wall above. He looked tired, bloodied and beaten. His hands pressed into the wall as though he needed its support. She ached to see him looking so weak but at least he looked human. She willed him to run. His eyes narrowed on Paul, dark and cold.

  Paul squeezed the trigger.

  Kat launched herself at Amon and tackled him to the ground, landing hard on her shoulder as the crack of the gunshot echoed along the street. The impact sent the phone flying from her hand. It skidded across the wet asphalt and stopped in a puddle.

  She ended up tangled beneath Amon, his full weight bearing down on her aching body.

  Her eyes snapped open.

  Deadly yellow ones met them, staring cold and intent from Amon’s face.

  It wasn’t time to be frightened. She pushed Amon off her and got to her knees. Her arms shot out either side of her, her body shielding Amon from Paul.

  “Back off, Paul,” she whispered, venomous. Her shoulder was killing her. The painful throb fuelled her anger and the desire to protect Amon was impossible to ignore. If Paul wanted to kill Amon, he was going to have to go through her.

  Paul aimed the gun at her, his eyes dark and focussed. “Move.”

  “No!” She backed into Amon, hoping he would see sense and stay down.

  Amon growled. It echoed through her, his wolf speaking to her own. Her presence was upsetting him. He wanted to protect her. She couldn’t let him. Paul wouldn’t shoot her but he would shoot Amon. She reached behind her and placed her hand on Amon’s back, praying the contact would keep him calm long enough for her to find a way out of this situation.

  She turned slightly and looked at Amon. He stared up at her, blood streaking the side of his face from a cut on his temple, eyes golden and speaking to her. Her own wolf rose inside her, responding to her feelings. She wanted to protect him too. She had to protect him. There was only one way to do it.

  Paul cocked the gun.

  She turned, yellow eyed, to face him. The surge in power was mind-blowing as she accepted the wolf inside her.

  “Will you kill me too when they put me on the list?” she said.

  Paul swallowed hard. The gun shook in his hand.

  “If you kill Amon, I’ll follow him into the darkness.” She furrowed her eyebrows and stood slowly, not wanting to startle Paul into reacting by moving too fast. “I need him.”

  A growl echoed low and deep in her chest and rumbled through her mouth. Her teeth extended, the feel of them elongating making her sick to her stomach. Trembling all over, she stood her ground, frightened of the strange feelings inside her as she surrendered to her true nature and started to change.

  She could do this. This side of her was the only one who could save Amon. She needed to embrace it and accept it. Her heart filled with strength and resolve. Amon was everything to her.

  She had made her decision.

  She would protect him.

  With a feral growl, she sprung at Paul. She knocked the hand he held the gun in to the side, grabbed his collar and slammed him into the black asphalt with her body weight. Her claws ripped through his jacket and scratched at his flesh. The smell of blood filled the air, driving her on. She fought the change, not wanting to turn completely. She was stronger and more agile in this strange in between state. She had to stay strong and not lose control.

  Paul shoved her away and she rolled to her feet, crouched low and ready for the fight. He swung his arm around, bringing the gun to point at her, and she leapt and swept her leg out in a high kick. Paul grunted when her foot connected with his hand, sending the gun toppling from his hand.

  She flinched as it hit the floor, afraid that it would go off. Paul launched himself at her. Kat blocked one punch after another, drawing on her years of training as a hunter to predict Paul’s moves and the speed her new heightened abilities gave her. They had been trained together at the Werewolf Control Forces, but while their combat was similar, she was stronger.

  He caught her hard with a left hook that sent her mind spinning. As she stumbled backwards, he grabbed her by shirt and pulled her back towards him. She quickly ducked to avoid his fist and slammed her own up into his gut, heaving him off the floor. His face hit her shoulder as he doubled up. She pushed him off her and brought her leg around in a lotus kick, catching him across the head with her heel and sending him down onto the wet asphalt.

  Breathing deep and steady, she readied herself for his counter attack. He was faster than she had anticipated, coming at her from a low crouch and grabbing her around the waist. He tackled her to the floor, landing heavily on top of her and knocking the air from her lungs. She grunted on impact. Her head smacked off the asphalt and her bones ached from the force of the blow.

  Paul grabbed her shoulders, pressing down on them, pinning her. She wriggled beneath him, fighting his hold on her. He pushed his hips against hers and she growled, disgusted by the feel of his crotch against hers. Her growl was joined by another, this one deeper and fierce. Amon. Her gaze shot to him where he knelt a short distance away. Bloody murder shone in his eyes. He tried to push himself up but collapsed back to his knees.

  Paul laughed. “You wanna watch while I take your bitch?”

  Kat’s eyes locked back on Paul’s, red-hot anger burning through her. Never. She would never let another man touch her.

  The wolf side of her bayed for his blood. It wanted his life as payment for hurting her mate and threatening her. She shut out the coaxing whispers in her mind. She couldn’t kill Paul. No matter how great the temptation.

  She forced Paul off her, rolled away and went to rise to her feet.

  Paul kicked her in the stomach while she was still on all fours. She coughed and turned in time to see him stand, his gun back in his hand. He swung it to point at her. She stared down at the barrel. Cold flashed through her. Her heart stopped.

  A second of silence ticked by.