Kilt Dead

by Kaitlyn Dunnett

  “Oh, well, thanks a lot. Maybe I’ll just sleep in my car!”

  “You could reconsider calling Sherri,” Dan suggested.

  “Sherri has enough on her plate without me adding to it.” Not to mention a mother and a son already living with her. Liss wished Gina Snowe still lived in Moosetookalook. Gina had been her best friend, but she’d moved away years ago. “I guess I could bunk at Ned’s.”

  “Liss, you—”

  “No, probably not a good idea. If I stay with Ned we’re likely to end up killing each other. We never did get along.” She winced. “I don’t believe I just said that. How can I talk so casually about killing? Joke about murder?”

  “Cops do it all the time,” Dan said. “It’s a way of coping.”

  She shivered. “I’m not a cop. I’m a dancer. I’m in charge of Aunt Margaret’s shop,” she amended, and that triggered another concern. “They’d better not mess up her inventory.”

  “You can keep an eye on things if you stay with me,” Dan said. “Nobody’s using your old room.”

  The suggestion warmed her. She didn’t want to think too deeply about why that should be so. Neither did she give herself time to come up with objections.

  “I’d like that. Spending a few days in the house I grew up in sounds like heaven just now.” Liss gave Dan the full benefit of her smile. “There’s a lot to be said for the old and familiar.”

  Chapter Five

  Old and familiar?

  Dan reached into the refrigerator for a cold one. Not quite how he’d seen himself in relation to Liss MacCrimmon. He took a swallow of the beer and wandered back into his living room. It was pretty obvious Liss still didn’t return his interest in her.

  Bad timing anyway, he told himself, what with Mrs. Norris dead and—

  “Damn! Lumpkin.”

  The thought of Mrs. Norris’s bad-tempered cat took Dan straight to the picture window. Given the location of the streetlight, right in front of Moosetookalook Scottish Emporium, he had no trouble seeing that the number of police vehicles had multiplied and that there was crime-scene tape around both Margaret Boyd’s place and the house next door.

  Dan debated with himself, but not for long. He could almost hear Mrs. Norris’s voice in his head, lecturing her third graders on their responsibility to the animals they claimed as pets.

  He let himself quietly out of the house and wandered back across the square. So far, it looked as if everyone was in Margaret’s building. Mrs. Norris’s house was dark except for a light in her kitchen.

  “Something I can do for you, Dan?” Pete Campbell loomed up out of the shadows, armed and dangerous.

  Dan cleared his throat. “You the one assigned to keep gawkers away?”

  “Pretty much. How’s Liss?”

  Just that quickly, the authority figure turned back into the old pal from high school. Dan let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “Snoozing peacefully, I hope. I got her to eat something first, and she said she was going to take one of the pain pills left over from her knee surgery to help her get to sleep.” It had been too late to order pizza, so they’d shared a can of Chunky soup and a bologna sandwich.

  “You should get some shut-eye, too.”

  “Yeah. Right. When a neighbor gets murdered in my nice quiet village, I think a good night’s rest is pretty much out of the question.” When that neighbor was a woman everyone knew, everyone liked—well, tolerated, anyhow—he had to wonder whether anybody was safe from random violence. “What’s going on in there?”

  Pete shrugged. “They took still shots and videos. Medical Examiner did his thing. The body’s gone to Augusta to be autopsied.”

  “But they haven’t been into Mrs. Norris’s house yet, right?”

  “Right. Why?”

  “Lumpkin’s in there. I was thinking I could take him home with me.”

  Pete hesitated.

  “Even LaVerdiere can’t object to me giving an orphaned cat a home. Or does he intend to interrogate Lumpkin, too?”

  “Now that I’d like to see. Come on.” Pete held the yellow tape out of the way so Dan could duck beneath it and follow him toward the house. “Better you tackle that damned cat than me. Last time I stopped by to chat with Mrs. N., he bit me on the ankle.”

  Dan glanced at Margaret Boyd’s place as they went in through Mrs. Norris’s unlocked kitchen door. She’d had a good view of the entrance to the stockroom. If someone had been trying to rob the Emporium, knowing it was closed while the Highland Games were in session, Mrs. Norris could have seen the intruder find the key and enter the building. That much made sense. What didn’t was her failure to call the police. Instead, she’d apparently gone right in after the thief. Why hadn’t it occurred to her that she might be putting herself in danger?

  “There he is,” Pete said.

  Lumpkin stood in the doorway that led to the hall: all twenty pounds of him. The big yellow tom blinked once at them, then plopped himself down and began to lick his tail.

  “Yeah, I’m fond of you, too,” Dan muttered. “Where’s your carrier?”

  They found it in the hall closet. A cage that looked much too small for a behemoth of Lumpkin’s proportions sat on the overhead shelf along with a collection of ball-caps and other hats. Dan took it down, unlatched the front, and advanced on the cat, who was still engrossed in grooming, pointedly ignoring the upstart humans who’d invaded his house.

  “Gotcha!” Dan came up with the cat under one arm.

  Lumpkin took exception to being grabbed. Squirming, kicking, and hissing, he tried to break free. The carrier crashed to the floor when Dan had to use both hands to hold onto the cat.

  “Good luck getting him inside that thing,” Pete said. “Lumpkin doesn’t like to be confined.”

  “He doesn’t much like being held, either.”

  Flat-eared, teeth bared to the gums, the cat snarled. Dan took a good look at that feral expression, swallowed convulsively, and tightened his grip. Lumpkin kicked out with his back feet, hard, claws extended. Dan grunted and shifted position, holding both of Lumpkin’s front legs in one hand and forcing the cat’s back end tight against his chest.

  He was reaching for the carrier when Lumpkin bit down hard on the soft, fleshy skin between Dan’s forefinger and thumb. With a yelp, Dan dropped him.

  “Now you’ve done it.” Pete was trying not to laugh.

  “You want to give me a hand here?”

  “Sure. I’ll hold the carrier.”

  Lumpkin led Dan and Pete on a merry chase through the house, but they finally cornered him in the small downstairs room Mrs. Norris had called her library. The walls were lined with tall bookcases. Seemingly without effort, Lumpkin went from the back of a recliner to the top of the nearest set of shelves. A looseleaf binder tumbled to the floor as he launched himself from there to Mrs. Norris’s cluttered desk. A stack of computer printouts, a tissue box, and a remote control scattered as he landed.

  “Close the door!” Dan yelled as the cat caromed off an end table and headed that way.

  Pete slammed it shut, trapping Lumpkin in the room. He was climbing the drapes when Dan pounced, recapturing him. Pete had the carrier ready, but Lumpkin managed to brace all four paws against the opening.

  Grimly determined, Dan pried them loose, claw by claw, and gave one final push. Lumpkin flew into the carrier. Dan closed and latched the grate on a yowl of protest.

  “Well, that was fun.” Pete surveyed the chaos, shaking his head. “What a mess. If LaVerdiere sees the place like this, he’s going to think somebody broke in and trashed it.”

  After first checking to make sure the catch on the cat carrier was secure, Dan set about putting the room back to rights. “The way I see it, there’s no need for Craig LaVerdiere to know we’ve been here.”

  Pete thought about that for a moment, then said, “I need to get back outside. Can you finish cleaning up on your own?”

  “No problem.”

  The fallen looseleaf b
inder had opened on impact, freeing the contents. Dan scooped everything up and took it over to the desk to line up the holes and put the pages back in order. He glanced idly at the printed words as the stack slid into place. He frowned as he recognized a name or two, but didn’t take time to read more than a few sentences.

  Ten minutes later, Dan was back home and Lumpkin had been freed from the much-hated cage.

  “Here. Console yourself.” Dan put a feeder full of kibble, also liberated from Mrs. Norris’s house, in a corner of the kitchen. He filled a cereal bowl with water and set that down next to it. Lumpkin curled a lip at him but deigned to eat.

  Dan went to the refrigerator for another beer.

  What the hell, he wondered, had he gotten himself into? He didn’t usually act on impulse, but somehow he’d ended up with two house guests. One of them was probably there for good.

  Too bad it wasn’t the one he’d like to keep.

  Yawning, Liss wandered into the kitchen at ten minutes past six the next morning. She stopped short at the sight of a large yellow cat. “Well, hello there, gorgeous. I didn’t know Dan had a cat.”

  “Dan doesn’t.” Dan sounded disgruntled. “Or rather, Dan didn’t. That’s Lumpkin. He belonged to Mrs. Norris.”

  As unexpected tears welled up, Liss felt her composure slip. She’d given herself a stern lecture before coming downstairs. She’d intended to show a brave front, act as if she’d put finding Mrs. Norris’s body behind her and could cope with whatever the new day might bring. Fat chance!

  She bent down to scratch Lumpkin behind the ear. “She only had the one?”

  Dan kindly ignored the hitch in her voice. “For the last couple of years, yeah. Remember when she had five felines in residence, along with a dog she named Not-a-cat?”

  “She did enjoy her pets.” Steadier now, Liss glanced at Dan over her shoulder. “Are you going to keep him?”

  “Kind of depends on him. Right now he’s not too happy to be here.” Dan indicated a section of freshly shredded wallpaper.

  “Poor baby. He’s just upset. He’ll settle down.” She lifted the cat against her chest and gave him a cuddle. She smiled when he began to purr. That had to be the most comforting sound in the universe.

  “He’s smirking at me over your shoulder,” Dan informed her. “I swear that cat hates me. He bit me on the ankle by way of greeting this morning.”

  “What did you do to him?”

  “Me?”

  “Yeah, you.” It was a relief to find she could banter with Dan.

  “I’ll have you know I’m innocent of all but the noblest of intentions.”

  “You haven’t been innocent since seventh grade.”

  Dan stared at her, bemused. “Okay. How did you come up with that?”

  “You were thirteen when you cooked up that scheme to con the other kids out of their lunch money by claiming it would go to a charity to save abandoned puppies.”

  “It did go for dog food.”

  Liss turned to look at him and grinned. He was standing in front of an east-facing window. The early morning sun behind him had created a totally inappropriate halo around his head. “Yes, for your own dog.”

  “I found Freckles in a box by the side of the road. I rest my case.” His gaze shifted to a spot behind her. “Damn!”

  A small television on top of the refrigerator had been running on mute, tuned to a morning news program. Dan reached for the clicker and restored the volume.

  “—and authorities here in Moosetookalook say the autopsy will be done in Augusta on Monday. Detective LaVerdiere, can you tell us anything else about the case?”

  An attractive brunette ignored the state police public affairs officer to shove her microphone in Craig LaVerdiere’s face. They were standing in front of Aunt Margaret’s store. The sign reading MOOSETOOKALOOK SCOTTISH EMPORIUM was plainly visible in the background.

  “We’re investigating several leads,” LaVerdiere assured her, giving the camera a phony smile. “We expect to have someone in custody shortly.”

  As one, Dan and Liss moved out onto the porch. From that vantage point they could plainly see that three news vans with satellite dishes were parked in front of the shop, along with several police vehicles. A crowd of townspeople had gathered and Liss recognized several of the neighbors . . . and Ernie Willett.

  “I’m glad you suggested moving my car into your driveway last night,” she murmured. “Unless Willett identifies it, no one will know where I am.” No one would bother her. At least, not today.

  “Come back inside,” Dan urged. “Eat something. Get dressed. We’ll get out of here as soon as you’re ready.”

  “One thing’s sure,” Liss said with a sigh. “I’m not going to have time to worry about my little career crisis today. Murder is one hell of a distraction.” Horrified by her own words, she clamped both hands over her mouth. “Oh, Lord! I didn’t mean that the way it sounded!”

  “Sit down, have another cup of coffee, and tell me about your career crisis. It will take your mind off Mrs. Norris.”

  As if he knew she needed reassurance, Lumpkin stropped Liss’s ankles. She sipped the coffee Dan poured and scratched the cat under the chin. But when he went back to his food dish, she hesitated. Dan was watching her, a contemplative look on his face.

  “What?”

  “I’ve been wondering why you came back.”

  “To help Aunt Margaret. Good grief. How am I going to tell her what happened to Mrs. Norris?”

  “You can’t do anything on that score yet. She’s barely had time to get to Scotland. So, you’re here, helping out. You have that much vacation time?”

  Very carefully, Liss placed the now empty coffee mug on the kitchen table. “Don’t be coy, Dan. It doesn’t suit you. I’m sure Aunt Margaret told you I had knee surgery.”

  “Yeah, she did. But she didn’t say how serious it was.”

  Liss stared into the dregs of the coffee. “Serious enough to end my career.”

  She hated saying that out loud. There were days when she could almost convince herself there was still hope for her as a dancer. When she’d done her stretches that morning, she’d been nearly as limber as she was before the accident.

  “I’ve devoted myself to dancing for so long,” she confided, “that I’m having a hard time imagining I’ll ever find another purpose, another passion to fill my life.”

  “Do you miss the touring, or just being on stage?” Dan asked.

  The question made her think before she answered. “Both, but it’s not being able to perform that really tears me up inside. I’ve considered going back in some other capacity, but I’m not sure I could bear watching everyone else on stage while I’m restricted to the wings. Even yesterday at the games, I stayed away from the stage where the dance competitions were being held. To watch others perform when I can’t. . . .”

  “Ever think about staying on here?” Dan asked.

  “I’m not sure Aunt Margaret’s shop can support another salesclerk.”

  Dan frowned. “Was Ned telling the truth? Did she overextend herself to buy into the hotel?”

  Startled, Liss gave him a hard look. “What are you talking about?”

  “Damn. I thought you knew.”

  “I know she invested in the castle, along with your father.”

  “Ned says she’s going to bankrupt herself if she doesn’t unload the hotel shares. Then again, it’s Ned who told me that.”

  “Are you involved in that project too?” Liss asked.

  “Only as free labor.” He glanced at his watch. “I’m supposed to be out there this morning, but I’m going to give it a pass. Dad will understand, soon as he hears about Mrs. Norris.”

  Liss started to protest that he didn’t need to stick around to babysit her, but Dan cut her off.

  “I’m going to the fairgrounds with you this morning. Give you a hand packing up.”

  “Sherri can—”

  “She’s just coming off her shift at the jail. I
don’t think she’s going to mind the help.”

  “I still have trouble taking that in. Sherri as a police dispatcher. Pete as a cop.”

  “Me as a good Samaritan?”

  “Oh, no. I had you pegged. Man who rescues abandoned puppies and orphaned cats.”

  A loud pounding at the door prevented Dan from responding. Liss turned. Her first thought was that Craig LaVerdiere had come for her. You’re innocent, she reminded herself. With the memory of LaVerdiere’s interrogation still fresh, that thought wasn’t much comfort.

  “Sit tight,” Dan said. “I’ll get that.”

  Liss didn’t know whether to feel relief or dismay when Ned followed Dan back into the kitchen.

  “Why didn’t you call me? I had to hear about it on the morning news.” Ned seemed distraught and looked as if he’d thrown on the first clothing that came to hand after he’d heard the television report. The short-sleeved Oxford-cloth shirt looked odd matched with ratty old cut-offs.

  “I’m sorry, Ned. It didn’t occur to me.” In all honesty, she hadn’t given Ned a thought except to consider his apartment as a temporary refuge. She’d never seen the place, but she knew it was only a few blocks away above one of the old storefronts on High Street.

  “It should have. After all, with Mother away, the business is my responsibility.”

  Very carefully, Liss put down the mug she’d just refilled with coffee. “I rather think it’s mine. Aunt Margaret left me in charge.”

  “Well, what are you going to do about this, then? Are you still going to the fairgrounds today?”

  “Yes. I’ll pack up—”

  “No. Keep the booth open. You’ll do a land-office business when news of this gets out.”

  “Yes, with ghouls!” Liss couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Ned, that would be disrespectful to Mrs. Norris.”

  “You have an obligation to a live woman, not a dead one. Besides, it’s not like we arranged her death for the publicity. Come on, Liss. The show must go on, right?”

  “Wrong, Ned.” Dan’s voice was level but his eyes betrayed a temper rapidly coming to a boil. “Have a little concern for your cousin’s feelings, why don’t you? She’s the one who found Mrs. Norris. Do you think she wants to spend the whole day fending off insensitive questions about the gory details?”