The Calendar of New Beginnings

by Ava Miles

  Scanning the massive room, she noticed their luggage nestled together in the corner. It was weird to see their things together. Growing up, Andy had had his house and she’d had hers, and even though they’d spent hours hanging out, they’d never had sleepovers. Boys and girls in their town just didn’t do that when they were only friends, so until now, there’d always been his space and hers.

  “We’ve never spent the night together,” she said, “even after all of our years of friendship.”

  “Are you nervous?” he asked, holding her close.

  “Probably. I don’t know. Sure.” She made a face. “What about you? Are you thinking about Kim?”

  His head darted back. “We agreed to be honest with each other, so yeah, I am. A little. I know she’s happy I’m with you. She always liked you, you know.”

  Lucy swallowed the lump in her throat. “I liked her too. I was so grateful she never got jealous, you know? When you first married her, I was a little worried. But she wasn’t like that.”

  “No,” he said with a sad smile. “She was glad I had you. In fact, she used to say she decided I was a keeper when she learned I was still best friends with a girl I’d met in kindergarten.”

  “Really?” Somehow that sweet, insightful comment made her miss Kim. So she sent her a quick thanks for…well, everything.

  “Kim thought our longstanding friendship meant I was a nice guy, and since she’d dated a few assholes in college, she was looking for something else.”

  Andy Hale was a nice guy, and Lucy realized she’d never been with one of those. Those other men had been interesting and smart and courageous, but none of them had been nice in the way Andy was. “Do you feel guilty? About what we’re about to do?”

  He took his time answering. “I’ve had my moments since I first started wanting you like this, but I’ve let it go. Lucy, you make me so happy. Having you back here, first as my friend and now like this… Well, it’s pretty damn perfect.”

  “You really do love me,” she said, studying his face. “All the way.”

  “Is that finally sinking into your thick skull?” he asked, fighting a smile and losing.

  Her heart twisted in her chest. “Seems so.”

  He leaned in until he was inches away from her mouth. “Let me show you how much.”

  Their lips met with a newness she could only marvel at. Her arms wrapped around him as he pressed lush kisses to her upper and lower lip.

  She cupped the back of his neck and stood on her tiptoes to press her mouth more firmly against his. He opened his, and so did she, and she fell into the lushness of the slow slide of their tongues against each other. He was rarely in a rush, she’d discovered, always content to let the heat and friction work their magic.

  Her breathing turned heavy, like the feeling in her belly, and she felt the beautiful tension of male arousal against her center. She pressed closer to him, rocking her hips, making him groan.

  “Let’s get some of these clothes off you,” he said harshly, edging back.

  They helped each other get bare to the waist. And of course, he had to check the healing wounds on her back, kissing each of them in benediction. His hands cupped her breasts, making her head fall back in pleasure. Her knees were turning weak, she realized, and she walked until she sat on the edge of the bed. He sank to his knees in front of her, opening her jean-clad legs and sliding between them. Oh man, that was really hot.

  He pressed his mouth to one of her breasts as she ran her hands over the hard muscles of his shoulders. His chest was strong and built, and she couldn’t get enough of him. He seemed to feel the same because he started to tug on her nipple in the most urgent of ways, making things below clench and tighten. She made a soft sound when he switched to the other breast and plunged her fingers into his dark hair.

  When he finally released her and looked up at her from his position between her knees, her mouth went dry. A tidal wave of lust crashed over her. She pushed him onto his heels and climbed into his lap, pressing her mouth to his in a hot, wet kiss. Locking her knees around his waist, she gripped him as he rocked against her. He groaned, clenching his hands on her bare skin, and then slid his hands down the back of her jeans.

  She jolted against his mouth at the caress, pressing away and standing. Her hands unzipped her jeans and pushed them down her legs. He took one of her feet into his hands to slowly slide her pant leg and sock off, all the while kissing the exposed skin of her thigh.

  Lucy thought she was going to die. “You’re driving me crazy.”

  “Good,” he muttered, kissing the inside of her knee, a place she’d heard was an erogenous zone.

  “I had no idea someone kissing your knee could feel so sexy,” she told him.

  He might have snorted, but since her ears were ringing, she couldn’t be sure. “How about here?” he asked.

  Her eyes crossed. “Yep. Bull’s-eye.”

  “You’re a talker,” he said, pulling her last sock off. “I don’t know why I’m surprised.”

  Standing before him in nothing but her underwear, she put her bare foot on his bare stomach, getting his attention. “Is that a complaint?”

  A slow sexy smile crossed his face as he slid his hand up her foot and then all the way to her core. She might have squeaked when he arrived at his final destination.

  “Not for a second,” he said, sliding a finger inside her panties. “Talk to me.”

  He caressed her slowly, gently at first, but when he increased the pressure of his touches, she decided she’d had enough.

  “Take them off,” she said, shoving her panties down her hips.

  “A talker and an impatient one at that,” he said, all honeyed-voice man now.

  “I’ll show you impatient,” she said, toppling him over until he lay on the rug.

  “There is a perfectly good bed behind you,” he said, chuckling softly. “In case you somehow missed it.”

  “Shut up,” she said, kneeling beside him and reaching for the zipper on his jeans. “If you’re going to drive me nuts, I’m going to drive you nuts.”

  “I think I’m going to like that,” he said as she undid his jeans and slid her hand into his briefs.

  He closed his eyes, his face a mask of tension. “Yeah, I like that. God, Lucy. More.”

  She managed to get his jeans and briefs down to his thighs, and he helped her the rest of the way. Like he’d done with her, she took his socks off while kissing his muscular legs. Then she sat back as the full view of him came into focus. Her mind sized up the subject before her. Andy Hale was lying naked and aroused on the bedroom floor, and he couldn’t have been more freaking sexy.

  “You’re so gorgeous,” she said, putting a hand on his muscular thigh.

  He sat up and cupped her face. “And you’re beautiful. Now, come here.”

  She shifted onto his lap, and the jolt of lust she experienced from the naked contact of their bodies had every nerve ending tingling. This was a level of lust she’d never felt before, and she could feel the last vestiges of humor and control vanishing.

  She wanted him. All of him. Now.

  Pressing her mouth to his, she kissed him again, and this time every wild impulse in her broke loose. She ran her mouth over the hard planes of his shoulders, savoring the taste of him. Her breasts tingled against his chest, and she gasped when he shifted, rising off the floor with her wrapped around him.

  “I want you in bed,” he said against her mouth before laying her in the center.

  They kissed, but soon it wasn’t enough. He made his way down her body, discovering all the places that made her cry out. The crook of her elbow. The sides of her breasts. And her core. That most of all.

  He lingered over her, teasing her heated flesh, urging her on with his mouth. She was too mindless to protest the intimacy of it all. And when he flicked his tongue over the center of her, she came in a rush, crying out.

  She felt him shift on the bed. As she watched, he reached for a foil packet on the night
stand and rolled on the condom. It was oddly sexy and intimate in a way it had never been before.

  Spreading her legs even wider to accommodate his body, he stretched out over her. All that bare, taut skin just inches away from her pretty much made her mouth water. She noticed the pillow in his hands before he grabbed her hips with one hand and tucked it under her. Whoa. This was new. And a whole lot of vulnerable. It was impossible not to gulp as he rose over her, all naked, aroused man.

  “Hey,” he said softly, caressing her face. “Stay with me.”

  Like there was anywhere else she could go.

  He edged forward, and she felt the press of him as he slid inside her. She dug her head into the mattress at the pressure of him, the heat of him.

  “All right?” he rasped out.

  She nodded, feeling suddenly overwhelmed. Her heart was changing in her chest, and then she realized why. This was making love. How could she think otherwise as she looked into his face? The light in his eyes seemed to reach all the way into her soul, and for the first time, she knew what it meant to feel complete with someone inside her. Totally complete.

  “Andy,” she whispered.

  He swallowed thickly and held his hands out to her, which she gripped tightly. “Right here, Luce.”

  Then he slid deeper and retreated. The slow slide of him inside her made her reach for him, and soon he found a gentle rhythm that pleased them both. Her knees gripped his body when she needed more, and he seemed to feel it because he increased the pace of his thrusts.

  And she was lost.

  She rocked against him, mindless from the passion rising within her again, but this time with a hard edge that could not be softened or controlled. Urgent cries sounded from her mouth as he pounded into her, never releasing her hands.

  “Lucy,” he called out, and she sought his face.

  Tension radiated from him as their gazes met. He gripped her hands even harder.

  “Let go,” he said, rocking into her.

  She tilted her head back as he pressed deeper and felt everything gather and then flash inside her. Her body contracted around him, and she cried out, thrashing against him. He thrust wildly and then froze above her, calling out her name.

  The very sound of his voice like that broke something free around her heart. She felt the pieces shatter, and when he folded over her, this time the wave she felt was of the greatest, fiercest love she’d ever known for another human being. Her body seemed to be falling, almost like she was plummeting from a tall cliff. But instead of hitting the ground, she floated, because there was no body after all.

  Surrendering to that weightlessness, she felt this new heart of hers expand until she was sure its energy was cocooning him as well. And when he nestled close and pressed his sweaty head to her neck, she breathed him in. The love she had for him continued to expand, and so she surrendered to a place where words and thoughts were no longer needed.

  Chapter 23

  Andy knew he was probably crushing Lucy, but he couldn’t seem to muster the energy to push away. His breath was still coming out in heaving gasps, his heart was pounding, and sweat was coating his skin. Holy freaking Christ. What had just happened?

  He hadn’t been with a lot of women, but he’d had a lot of sex. Good sex. Great sex. The kind of regular married sex that used to put a smile on his face throughout the day. It had gotten better with Kim the more they’d done it, the longer they’d been together.

  He’d thought that was how things worked.

  Lucy had just blown that theory to hell. Sex with her was like jumping to light speed, and he was flailing to wrap his shorted-out mind around it.

  Things had pretty much gone as expected at first. There had been humor between them, and she’d gotten pushy. He’d known she would play an active part.

  But something had changed the moment he’d entered her. She’d gripped his hands and opened everything she was to him, and he’d felt like the deepest parts of each of them were merging together. And then she’d come, harder and hotter than he could have ever imagined. The passion between them had been crazy and urgent, and the last threads of his control had splintered. The force of his climax had been absolute and unwavering. His body felt hollow now, but there was this odd expansion in his chest, one that felt all warm and comforting.

  He nuzzled her neck, wanting to touch her, to be close to her, to never be apart from her. There was love here. So much love he felt small in the face of it.

  She was quiet, her breathing smoother than his, and so soft and pliant beneath him. He forced himself onto his elbows and realized their hands were still wrapped around each other. Her auburn hair was mussed, a lock of it laying against her soft, white cheek. The rusty line of her eyelashes curled in the most appealing way. He’d never realized how long her eyelashes were before. He saw every freckle, every pore on her face. It was like every atom that made Lucy O’Brien was suddenly visible to him.

  She was beautiful, breathtakingly so.

  Her lashes flickered, and her eyes opened. There was wonder there and so much love his heart seemed to fill with it like a water bucket from a well.

  “Hey,” he said softly.

  The only response he received was a smile, and it was enough.

  He gathered his strength to shift off her, but she tightened her legs around him.

  “No,” she whispered. “Stay.”

  “I don’t want to crush you.”

  “You’re not,” she said, all soft and warm under him.

  “Let me take care of this,” he said and dispensed with the condom.

  Coming back to rest on top of her, they stayed that way until he got a crick in his neck from being on his elbows too long. When he shifted onto his back, she cuddled against him.

  Hours seemed to pass. They didn’t speak, and it might have been the longest they’d ever gone without saying a word. Her hand rested on his chest like she was counting his heartbeats while he ran his hand along the side of her back, marveling at the smooth line of her vertebrae.

  Finally, his stomach grumbled, and he sighed.

  “You’re hungry,” she said, still quieter, still more peaceful than usual.

  “I can wait a little longer,” he said, not wanting to interrupt their reverie.

  She made no move to rise, only rested her face on his chest. When his stomach made more noises, she finally pressed up. Her hair looked a bit tangled, which pleased him somehow, and her eyes were like luminous jewels.

  “Come on,” she said. “You need to eat.”

  He tugged her back, drinking in her soft gaze. “I don’t want to leave this.”

  A half smile touched her face. “We won’t.”

  But she kept her back to him as she rose and pulled on a robe from her bag, and he could feel that they were once again on unfamiliar ground. At least there were puffy clouds beneath their feet.

  She was making sandwiches when he joined her in the kitchen. He wrapped his arms around her middle. The sweep of her mustard-covered knife slowed on the bread.

  “Well,” he said in a deep voice. He hadn’t heard himself sound this way for some time, husky and satisfied, replete from lovemaking.

  “Well,” she replied, resuming her task.

  “Can you stop making the sandwiches for just a minute, please?”

  She set the knife down on the counter and turned around. There wasn’t a smile on her face, but her eyes were serious.

  “Are we going to talk about what we’re feeling here?” he asked, suddenly awkward again. “I…it was cataclysmic for me. You?”

  “Same,” she said, leaning back against the counter. “I was trying to credit it to the pillow.”

  A smile tugged at his lips. “Seriously?”

  Her shoulder lifted. “I’ve never…”

  “Ah…it’s an anatomy thing,” he said, putting his hand next to hers on the counter. “I studied anatomy, remember?”

  “You always were an A student,” she responded, giving away nothing.
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  “It wasn’t the pillow. It was us. This.”

  She heaved out a slow breath. “I know. I thought it would be good, but I didn’t see this coming, frankly.”

  It was hard not to grin. “Neither did I, but as my mother always says, ‘Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.’”

  She punched him in the chest, righting the easy balance between them. “Thanks for making me think about your mother after I just had wild sex with her son.”

  Since she was starting to seem more like herself, he pressed a little closer. All he wanted to do was put her on the countertop and gobble her up. “It was more than wild sex.”

  “Yes, it sure was. As I was making the sandwiches, I finally realized why.”

  He couldn’t keep from sliding his arms around her waist. “Enlighten me.”

  She pressed her lips together like she was trying to find the words. “When I was out on a particularly tough assignment, I would come back to wherever I was staying feeling numb. It was like everything inside me was frozen after what I’d seen. If I had Internet, I’d pull up my computer and write to you—even if you weren’t awake.”

  How many nights had he done the same with her? Especially after Kim had died. She’d been his salvation in a way, the one person with whom he could share his deepest and darkest hurts and fears.

  “When I finished writing you, I could feel my heart again.”

  He was stunned for a moment when the words sunk in. “Oh, Lucy.”

  She took his hand and placed it over the spot that reverberated in steady, easy beats.

  “I felt like that again after we made love,” she said, and he knew it was the first time she’d used that term instead of sex. “Andy, you help me get in touch with my heart. You always have. And today…today you put me into a deeper connection with my heart than I’ve ever experienced.” She looked at him, and he was alarmed to see tears gathered in the corners of her eyes. “I didn’t expect that.”

  His own heart thundered in his chest.

  “You’ve always helped me feel my heart too,” he said quietly, “even when I didn’t think I had one left.”