Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon?, Vol. 11

by Fujino Omori

  “…All right. I’ll do it.”

  Hermes smiled slightly at her back as she walked away. Then he, too, vanished into the night.

  From our home in the southwestern section of the city, I head to Daedalus Street, in the southeast.

  The instant I step into the tangled streets of the Labyrinth District, the other adventurers all stare at me.

  “…!”

  They’ve been peering around the streets suspiciously, and now they direct those suspicious glares at me.

  …No, it’s okay. This is fine. I’m not afraid.

  I wander aimlessly down the street, succeeding in my goal of attracting attention.

  “Hey, Little Rookie! If you know something, how about telling us?”

  “…I don’t know anything.”

  “My god won’t shut up about it. Keeps on saying you must know something about monsters.”

  I’m drawn into several exchanges with ill-bred adventurers whose names I don’t know. My response to them is always the same.

  All of Daedalus Street is on edge. Perhaps it’s because now, five days after the monsters appeared on the surface, adventurers are tired and irritated after their efforts have led to no noticeable progress.

  Or perhaps they sense something.

  Perhaps they know something is about to happen.

  After surviving several quarrels with other adventurers without incident, I approach an elven archer.

  “Um…What’s going on with the civilian evacuation?”

  “…Not a soul is left around here. The Guild moved them all out. Those who haven’t evacuated by today seem to have gathered on the northwestern side of Daedalus Street,” he answers courteously, although with an uncomfortable look on his face. The Labyrinth District is located in the city’s third section, squeezed between East and Southeast Main Streets. As far as I can tell from the elf’s responses, the bulk of the civilian residents have evacuated to a section of East Main Street.

  Pain pierces my heart as I think of Lai and the other orphans, but at the same time I’m relieved. Most likely, the battle in Daedalus Street will take place between its southern and western sections.

  Now, what about Loki Familia…?

  Taking care to not let the other adventurers distract me, I scan my surroundings. I search along the grimy brick boulevard for the emblem of the Trickster…and there it is. Demi-human men and women stand against a wall whispering to one another, their armor bearing the crest. The members of Loki Familia glance at me, then scurry out of view.

  “…?”

  I don’t know what to make of them. They clearly recognized me before moving away, but I can neither talk to them nor follow them. Pretending to be searching for information, I gradually make my way toward the south side of the Labyrinth District.

  Those people…Did they go to tell somebody? Who? Finn? Or—?

  A moment later, the answer to my question falls from above.

  Stomp! Stomp!

  The grating sound of boots landing on a hard surface draws my gaze upward.

  “…What the—?”

  I can’t believe my eyes. On the roof of a tall building on this street, beautiful golden hair shimmers against the black night sky.

  Eyes to match the hair tossing in the wind gaze down directly at me.

  Clad in silver and blue-green, the Sword Princess, the strongest in the city, has appeared above me.

  Aiz…?!

  “…”

  Aiz had picked the boy out from the many adventurers coming and going on the street. She stared down at him as he looked up at her in amazement.

  Finn. If that boy comes to Daedalus Street…I will watch him.

  Earlier, as the adventurers were preparing to take their positions after having rested, Aiz had offered her services to Finn.

  “Really?…Can you do it? Aiz, you’ve supported Bell Cranell too much. Honestly speaking, I’m afraid you’d purposely lose sight of him,” he had responded.

  Bell’s surveillance was the one thing that Finn had not intended to hand over to Aiz.

  “I’ll be frank with you, Aiz. Objectively speaking, Bell Cranell is a destabilizing force in Orario right now. He’s a risk factor. Given that, we need to do two things. First, be vigilant, and second, if the need arises, stop him from acting.”

  “…”

  “Can you really do those things?”

  Aiz had looked down for a moment from the eyes of her leader, which would tolerate no dishonesty. Then she nodded firmly.

  “If he tries anything…I will stop him. If someone has to stop him, I want it to be me.”

  “…”

  “And if a monster shows up…I will take it down.”

  Aiz’s words were an unadorned reflection of the mixture of duty and personal desire in her heart.

  Finn had peered into her unclouded eyes, then nodded.

  “All right,” he had said.

  “He doesn’t trust me…” Aiz murmured, returning from her reverie and looking over her shoulder. “But there’s nothing to do about it.”

  The truth was, Aiz couldn’t help having a soft spot for the boy.

  Chasing away these idle thoughts, Aiz focused her attention on the cityscape beneath her.

  …As Olba and the other low-level members of the familia told me, he’s alone for now…

  The boy was still looking up at her. She had deliberately let him see her in order to keep him in check. And so her watch began.

  Aiz is here alone, watching me…?!

  This is the worst. I’m done for.

  Thoughts spring to mind unbidden the moment I see her. They’ve let loose the strongest weapon in the faction on me, and they don’t intend to let me do anything stupid. They plan to cut down our little tricks with one swing of their sword. Loki Familia has left my surveillance entirely up to Aiz.

  As I stand frozen in the middle of the street, the other adventurers follow my gaze upward and notice the Sword Princess. A trickle of cold sweat slides down my cheek. Pretending to wipe it away, I whisper into the oculus on the back of my left hand.

  “Goddess…Miss Aiz is here.”

  “Ugh, really?”

  The goddess’s agitated voice comes back to me through the blue crystal, which is off so as to not show an image.

  “Well, in one sense, it means you’ll be able to keep that little Wallen-something glued to your side…But if you need to, do you think you’ll be able to shake her?”

  “That might be—No, that definitely won’t be possible.”

  My role is to attract attention and, if the need arises, to find the Xenos who got separated from the group. It’s a guerrilla position that capitalizes on my mobility. But that scheme has just gone up in smoke. I was supposed to be a diversion, but they’ve assigned only one person to watch me—Aiz. And that means no matter how much I move around, Loki Familia’s battle formation in Daedalus Street won’t budge a celch. This must be Finn’s work.

  As long as Aiz is paired with me, all our tricks will be foiled.

  Should I take advantage of the confusion to shake her off?

  No, it can’t be done. Even if I use one of Fels’s magic items…

  I brush my hand against the swell of the pouch hidden under my mantle, holding my breath. Just then…

  “Hey!”

  “Eeeek?!”

  I let out a startled cry as hands tap both my shoulders. My heart pounding, I jump into the air.

  The adventurers around me start in surprise. Flustered, I turn around.

  “Huh? Nahza?”

  Her eyes drooping sleepily, dog ears hanging beside her face, and uneven sleeves hiding her airgetlám—her fake arm—the Miach Familia captain addresses me in her usual flat voice and raises both hands.

  “Hello…”

  “Wh-what are you doing here?”

  “Um…Well, I guess I’m here to help you guys.”

  The words of my chienthrope acquaintance surprise me once again.

  “You�
�re in trouble, aren’t you? You sure do hold back. It would have been fine for you to ask me a favor, considering our relationship…”

  “No, but…Nahza, don’t you know…what I did?”

  “I don’t know the details…But let me guess, you got yourself into trouble again by chasing after some girl’s backside. Right?”

  “No, that’s not…!”

  …But is she really wrong?

  In the sense that I ran after Wiene, I have to admit that she’s not…

  Nahza nods understandingly and pats me on the back. I can feel a sweat coming on.

  “Anyway, this is what Lord Miach told me to do…”

  “What?”

  Nahza explained that he’d told her I had caused some problems, but she was to help me anyway without asking any questions.

  “I think Lord Takemikazuchi’s familia is probably around here somewhere, too. Hermes seems to have told them that you went to Daedalus Street…Bell, I’m going to say it one more time. You’re too reserved.”

  Miach and Takemikazuchi both chose to save…not the Xenos but me, who is trying to save the Xenos. They are trusting me, even though I’ve reached out to help monsters.

  My vision grows blurry at the thought of their response and the kindness of Nahza, who has placed her trust in me at a time like this.

  “…Bell, you’re such a crybaby.”

  “S-sorry!”

  I quickly wipe my eyes to keep the tears from falling. Still, Nahza—who’s older than me—strokes my hair affectionately. I blush as the other adventurers glance at me curiously.

  “So, is there anything I can do? It’s just me now, with Daphne and Cassandra gone, of course…”

  “Um, well…if you insist…”

  Conscious of Aiz’s watching eyes, I feel under my mantle for the pouch hidden there. As I withdraw one of the items and pass it to Nahza, I mumble some instructions into her ear.

  “Okay, got it…and Bell, you’d better buy a lot of potions from me next time!” she said with a grin.

  “Ha-ha…Will do!”

  She walks away, waving as she goes. She’s given me a jolt of energy, and courage.

  A woman…a chienthrope…

  From the roof of the building, Aiz watched Bell’s meeting with Nahza.

  …She’s stroking his hair.

  Unconsciously, her own hand stroked thin air comfortingly, like a little girl whose pet had been taken away from her.

  An instant later, she realized what she was doing and shook her head as if to clear it.

  Is he handing her something? I can’t watch both of them…I’d better tell Raul, she thought, as Bell and Nahza parted.

  She continued to monitor Bell.

  Nahza’s help may turn out to be crucial…I wonder if I should tell Lilly.

  After saying good-bye to the chienthrope, I head for the southernmost section of the Labyrinth District. I glimpse Aiz out of the corner of my eye a few times—of course she’s following me—and start to bring the oculus in my gauntlet to my lips, intending to get in touch with the goddess. But before I can do so, a shrewish female voice rings in my ear.

  “Bell Cranell!”

  “Eek?! Aisha?”

  “What are you screaming about? You sound like a monster is chasing you. Did you mistake me for that big toad of a woman?”

  “S-sorry! And Lyu, too—Ergh!”

  I blink in surprise as Lyu reaches out a finger and presses it to my lips. She is wearing a hood and a mask that hides her face, while Aisha is dressed like a showgirl.

  “Greetings, Mr. Cranell. But please, kindly avoid yelling out my name.”

  “Wh-what are you doing here?” I ask, repeating the exact question I asked Nahza.

  “Andromeda told us everything. We’ve come to help you,” Lyu says calmly.

  “I didn’t tell you, but I’ve joined Hermes Familia. Apparently, there’s no such thing as veto power over there,” Aisha adds with a shrug.

  I haven’t quite figured out what’s going on, but…Hermes again?

  Given our topic of conversation, we’re hunched together like we’re having a secret conference. The male adventurers on the street click their tongues in disgust at the sight of my face only a hairbreadth away from the masked Lyu and the gorgeous, charming Aisha. Their eyes are cold enough to freeze me solid…

  “Andromeda had some requests…”

  “I’ll take care of that. Is there anything you need? Just say the word.”

  “Well…” Talking to talented second-tier adventurers makes me nervous, but I make my request.

  “…That’s a rather difficult order,” Lyu says. Aisha is less restrained, however.

  “You’ve got some nerve!”

  “S-sorry! Even if you could just buy me a little time…or is that too difficult?”

  To be honest, I know full well that I’ve asked a lot. But I also know that now is not the time to hold back.

  If I don’t request their help, I won’t be able to do a thing.

  “No, no, we’ll do it. If that’s what you want. We’ll do everything we can.”

  “Lyu…I’m sorry. Thank you so much.”

  A feeling of deep gratitude wells up in my chest as I look into the sky-blue eyes in the depths of her hood.

  The sensation of Aisha’s arm encircling my neck startles me from this pensive mood.

  “Uh…!”

  “Trouble surrounds you, boy. Or should I say, you can’t help sticking your head in it?”

  Both of Aisha’s arms are around my neck now, and she is pulling me toward her.

  I am surrounded by soft brown skin and the scent of musk. I flush at the feeling of her large breasts against me as she sighs into my ear.

  “When this is all over, I want my proper reward.”

  “Huh?!”

  She licks her lips and gives me a fiercely coquettish smile. I can feel the blood draining from my cheeks when—

  “I thought I told you to keep your hands off him!”

  Lyu jabs her wooden sword toward Aisha with frightening force.

  Aisha dodges the point as if she’s been waiting for it—with me still pressed into her cleavage. From the shadows of her hood, Lyu’s eyes burn with wrath.

  This is no show. She’s genuinely furious!

  “Let go of Mr. Cranell this instant. If you don’t, I’ll beat you to a pulp.”

  “Just you try! I’m not the type to sit there staring at my prey with my mouth shut!”

  Why has the situation suddenly turned violent?! Didn’t they say they were going to help me?!

  I desperately try to wriggle out of my soft brown constraints, but I can’t break free of those Level 4 arms. I’m trapped between the anger of an elf and the body of an Amazon. On top of that, the eyes of the other adventurers are filled with a mixture of resentment and malice…Ahhhhhhhhhh……!

  Wait, I’m being watched right now!

  I look up and right there—

  Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

  Aiz is staring right at me!

  More women…? An Amazon and…who could that be?

  Aiz looked down on the Amazon and the masked figure as they interacted with the boy.

  Oh, she just pressed her fingers against his lips.

  ……And he’s being…embraced!

  Aiz watched in silence from the edge of the roof as the Amazon pressed Bell to her breast. Seemingly of their own accord, Aiz’s legs bent into a crouch to bring her a tiny bit closer to the scene below.

  She wrapped her arms around her legs and stared fixedly at Bell.

  If Aiz’s surveillance were rain, this would be a downpour.

  This is bad, this is bad…! I want to run to her and explain everything…!!

  When Lyu, Aisha, and their argument finally leave me, I start sweating like a waterfall.

  The other adventurers seem on the verge of a riot, and I’m not fond of their murderous glares, but it’s Aiz and her constant gaze that are bothering
me the most!

  And her expression hasn’t changed a bit. Not one bit!

  It’s like she’s taking me to task for something. My heart won’t stop thumping.

  Is this another one of your strategies to undermine me, Finn?! I scream inside my head, although my fear and awe for the first-tier adventurer are almost certainly unjustified.

  I’d better go somewhere with less people…

  Or so I thought.

  “There you are! Bell!!”

  The final assassin arrives.

  “E-Eina?!”

  “I finally found you! I’ve been looking everywhere!”

  Dressed in her Guild uniform, she heads straight for me. I hear malicious whispers of “Again?” around me. My sweat is reaching high tide.

  “Wh-what are you doing here?” I ask for the third time tonight.

  “I heard you were in Daedalus Street! And when I asked the other adventurers, they very kindly pointed me in your direction!” Eina says passionately.

  I have to admit that given the amount of attention I draw, asking other adventurers could be a good way of finding me.

  But…is Eina mad?

  I thought that when we met it would be more…awkward?

  Ignoring my panic, she walks right up to the tip of my nose.

  “Since you didn’t come after so long, I had to come to you!”

  “S-sorry?! Um, I, uh, I felt embarrassed and too ashamed to show my face, so…?!”

  “I bet you did. You’re just that type of guy! No matter how serious the situation, you’re such a chicken that it surprises even me! But don’t you think it would have been a good idea to at least get in touch or see me once?”

  “I-I’m sorry…!” I say, flinching.

  I’ve never seen Eina look this ferocious before.

  The fault rests entirely with me—I’m the one who caused trouble for her and made her worry—so all I can do is apologize profusely. She’s angry with me from the depths of her heart, and she’s laying into me like a sister berating her younger brother.

  “So I’m just some woman you used when it suited you, huh?!”

  “Miss Eina, Miss Eina?! Someone might misunderstand you…!” I yell back as she drops today’s biggest bomb yet.

  The stares of the other adventurers have become even sharper. I had already hit rock bottom, but now a scrap of garbage would have a better reputation than me. I can hear them hurling insults and curses my way.