by Susanna Carr
“I told you I would.” He frowned. “Why are you surprised?”
“I …” She had prepared herself for disappointment, assuming he wouldn’t remember his promise. “Most of the men in my family are against educating women.”
Nadir’s eyebrow arched. “And you thought I shared the same views as your uncle?”
“No! No, of course not.” She had been trying so hard not to say that, but Nadir had clearly read her mind. “The tutor is a wonderful surprise. Thank you.”
Zoe brushed her lips against his cheek. She felt the muscle bunch in his jaw. Tension radiated from him. She knew Nadir was exerting his willpower and holding back. The gesture of thanks was a mistake. She knew better. One kiss was all it took for them to wind up in bed.
“I should go,” he said gruffly, his gaze on her mouth. He swallowed hard. “If you need anything let the butler know. He will always be here.”
At this rate she’d have an entire entourage with her when she tried to leave. “Nadir, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but it’s not necessary. I’m looking forward to exploring on my own.”
Nadir’s eyes narrowed. “You will not go out alone.”
Zoe folded her hands and fought to control her temper. Why must he say it like that? She was smart and capable. “English is spoken here,” she reminded him. “I can navigate.”
Nadir shook his head. “Your guide and a driver will be with you at all times.”
Zoe squeezed her fingers together. She kept perfectly still as her mind raced. How was she going to look for the American embassy or hop on a plane to Texas when everyone was keeping an eye on her?
She reached out and cupped her hand against his angular jaw. She enjoyed seeing his eyes darken. She knew this was the last time she would have a chance to touch him. Once he left the suite she would disappear from his life.
“You don’t have to feel guilty about leaving me alone on our honeymoon,” she said earnestly. “I know how to take care of myself. I’m used to it.”
“And your family were quite used to the trouble you caused when you were by yourself,” Nadir murmured. He turned his head and placed a kiss in the center of her palm.
Another bolt of lightning ricocheted across the dawn sky. Zoe’s breath hitched in her throat as she watched the brilliant light flash across the dramatic features of Nadir’s face. He looked rough and dangerous. Sexy.
She felt her skin flush and tighten. Her hand tingled under his mouth. She wanted more of this. More of him.
Maybe it wasn’t smart to make a run for it within minutes of arriving in Singapore. She held his gaze as the electric tension shimmered between them. Perhaps she should get familiar with Singapore and create a strategy. She could leave any time within the next few days.
Nadir reached for his cell phone and punched a button. “Rehana? Change of plans. You won’t be needed today,” he said as he pressed his lips against the inside of Zoe’s wrist. “Let them know I won’t make it to the office for a couple more hours.”
“You’re not going to the office?” Zoe asked as she watched him turn off his phone. “I thought you were needed for intense negotiations. It’s the whole reason we’re in Singapore.”
He tossed the phone on the table. “I’m delegating because I have more important things to do.”
She frowned. “Such as?”
A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Spending the morning with my wife.”
Zoe slowly blinked. That was the last thing she’d expected him to say. He wanted to be with her, too. A warm, tingly feeling washed over her. “You don’t need to,” she said softly.
“I want to.” His dark eyes sparkled. “And you want me to as well.”
He thought this was all to get more attention from him? What arrogance! If only he knew she was trying to get some time alone. “I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to,” Nadir said. He slid his hand over hers and laced their fingers.
And at that moment she wanted to be with him. Spend time together. She wanted to act like newlyweds, even if it was pretend. This was an arranged marriage, not a love match.
“What if I ask you to cancel my itinerary?” she asked hopefully.
“I will for the morning,” he compromised as he pressed his mouth against her temple. “But you will meet your tutor.”
Zoe made a face. “This is supposed to be my honeymoon, not a special brand of torture. It took me forever to learn how to speak Arabic.”
“You need to learn how to read it,” Nadir said. He pressed another kiss against her cheek. “How else are you going to read bedtime stories to our babies?”
“Babies?” Her heart lurched. Where had that idea come from?
“Yes, babies,” Nadir said smoothly, although he seemed as surprised as she was by his comment. “I expect more than one.”
Of course he would. He was the heir to the throne. She should have thought about this! “We have never spoken about having children.” Now was the time to tell him she wasn’t ready for a baby.
“What is there to talk about?” he murmured.
“Plenty.” Zoe closed her eyes, her mind whirling, as he caught her earlobe between his teeth. She shivered as the hot sensation sparked just under her skin. She wanted to forget everything and indulge in the pleasure.
She knew what she couldn’t say. That the only time she would become pregnant was when she was in a solid and loving relationship. That she needed to feel safe and free before she brought a child into the world.
“I need an heir,” Nadir said softly. “Jazaar is already on baby watch. There’s hope that we will have a baby boy nine months from now.”
“Jazaar can wait.”
“But can I? I like the idea of you carrying my baby.” She heard the male satisfaction in his husky voice.
Of course he would, Zoe decided. She shouldn’t read anything in what he said. A pregnant sheikha was a sign of the Sheikh’s strength and virility. It had nothing to do with how he felt about her.
“You want me to have your baby? Me?” She didn’t fit any requirement for a good Jazaari bride. Why would he think she could make a good Jazaari mother?
“You are the Sheikha. My only wife. Who else can give me a legitimate heir?”
Ah, that was how she met the qualifications. Zoe struggled to collect her thoughts. “Nadir, I’m not ready to have children.”
He went still and slowly lifted his head. “What are you saying?”
“I think we should use birth control,” she said carefully, but she couldn’t bring herself to meet his gaze. “I’ll take care of everything. In fact I’ll meet with a doctor today.”
There was a long pause and Nadir took a step back. “You don’t want my baby?”
She winced. “I—I didn’t say that. I’m saying—”
“That you don’t want my baby right now?” he said in a low, restrained tone.
She was making this worse. Zoe knew she had to explain, but she was hesitant to bring up her dreams. She had never talked about her goals much because the only way she could protect them from her family was to keep them secret.
Nadir was different from anyone she had met in Jazaar. If he understood why those goals were important to her he wouldn’t get in her way. He might actually show her support.
“You may not know this, but I have a few goals,” she said, looking down at the ground as her pulse quickened. “I want to accomplish some things before I have a family.”
“What are your goals?”
She dared a glance in Nadir’s direction. He seemed genuinely interested. No, it was more than that, Zoe realized as the hope swelled in her chest. He was pleased that she was sharing something about herself.
She nervously swiped her tongue across her bottom lip. “I want to complete my education.”
“I also want that for you,” he said with a shrug. “That’s not a problem. Your Arabic tutor is just the beginning.”
“I want more than a basic edu
cation,” Zoe explained, her words coming out in an excited rush. “I want to become a doctor.”
“A doctor?” Nadir repeated dully. What had he started? He had no idea why he had mentioned babies earlier. Though he was warming up to the idea of Zoe being pregnant with his child, especially after she’d displayed courage and loyalty at their last wedding ceremony.
And a moment ago he had been pleased that she was finally opening up to him. It was a sign of her trust in him. Now he had to deny her that dream.
“Honestly, I don’t know if I have what it takes to become a doctor,” she said. Her face was aglow with enthusiasm as she gestured with her hands to emphasize her point. “But I want to continue the work of my parents.”
His gut twisted. He’d had no idea she had ambitious plans for her future. Plans that interfered with her new role.
“No.”
His voice was soft but it affected Zoe like the lash of a whip.
Her eyes widened and her hands froze in midair. “Did you just say no?”
“Having a career outside the palace is not practical. As much as I want to modernize Jazaar, they would not understand a working sheikha.”
“They’ll get used to it,” she promised.
Nadir shook his head. “My detractors already think I am too Western. Having an American wife with career ambitions would give them too much ammunition.”
Zoe dropped her hands to her sides. “I see. You need to show that you have tamed your American bride.”
He wouldn’t have put it that bluntly, but it was the truth. He needed to show every tribal lord that he embraced their culture while dragging them into this century. “I need a sheikha who will honor tradition,” he said. “A woman who symbolizes all of Jazaar’s values.”
“Beauty, refinement and obedience.” She spat out the words with disgust. “Have you considered that becoming a doctor would enhance my role as sheikha?”
“No. The sheikha’s role is to support her husband. Nothing else can take priority.”
He saw the impotent anger in Zoe’s eyes. The determined set of her jaw. She was willing to fight for her dreams even if it meant going against him. It was clear that she saw him as the enemy.
Nadir swallowed a sigh. She would never see that he was protecting her, not destroying her. The draconian palace officials would fight her every step of the way, and they wouldn’t stop there. The officials had outdated views about women. They would quash her spirit so she would remain obedient.
It would be best for her if she didn’t cling to her dreams. She needed to pick her battles carefully.
He wondered why Zoe’s family hadn’t warned her about the sacrifices she would have to make to become Sheikha. They probably didn’t care. They were only concerned about the bridal price and their connection to the royal family.
Zoe never should have married him. She didn’t fit any of the requirements to be a royal bride. Not only had she given up her lover to be at his side, but she had future ambitions that she was not allowed to pursue. And she wasn’t the type to surrender her dreams. He was going to have a fight on his hands.
Nadir crossed his arms and braced his legs. “Zoe, there are some things you can’t do because you’re the Sheikha. The logistics and security measures would be impossible. A doctor’s duties would challenge a sheikha’s rules of conduct. A career is just not feasible. You can be a patron or president of a medical charity, but you can’t work as a doctor.”
Zoe’s eyes narrowed and her lush mouth drew into a firm line. “Taking care of the women in my tribe was the only thing that got me through the days.”
“And now you have a new tribe and a new role.”
She closed her eyes and exhaled sharply. “This is unfair. I never wanted to be a princess or a sheikha. I’ve always wanted to be a doctor.”
“You have already made your choice, Zoe.”
“I didn’t make the choice,” she said bitterly. “The choice was made for me.”
“I’m not going to change my mind,” Nadir warned her, his voice soft and lethal. “This conversation is over.”
She clenched her hands and thrust out her chin. She wasn’t going to let him see her crushing disappointment. It was her only protection. This was why she’d kept her dreams a secret.
Why had she even thought the Sheikh would be an ally? Because of his progressive ideas? Or had she mistaken his amazing lovemaking skills for actual caring? Nadir could pretend to be a thoughtful husband, but he made it very clear that he saw her as an interchangeable accessory.
She wanted to fight harder. Fight dirty. But she would run the risk of revealing too much, and Nadir could use that against her. Zoe slowly unclenched her fists and fought for composure. Why bother fighting? She was going to leave him and go back to Texas. He could make plans for her. She wouldn’t be here to follow through.
“Fine,” she bit out. She couldn’t look at him, knowing her eyes flashed with defiance. She felt his surprise and suspicion at her quick capitulation. “But I’m still going to a doctor about birth control,” she said as she turned on her heel and headed for the doorway.
“You still don’t want my baby?” he drawled.
“Maybe I want the honeymoon to last a little longer,” she said sarcastically over her shoulder.
“If that’s what you want,” Nadir said, “we won’t try to have children until after our first wedding anniversary.”
She whirled around. She was stunned that he’d agreed to one of her wishes. What was he up to? She studied his expression and he appeared sincere. “Do you really mean that?”
Nadir slowly approached her. “But you might already be pregnant.”
Zoe shook her head. “It’s the wrong time of the month for me, but I’ll have the doctor verify that today.”
“Good.” He cupped her elbow. “And I meant what I said about the medical charities. You could do great work without being a doctor.”
Zoe stared at his hand and gave a sharp nod. She didn’t trust herself to speak. He thought he was being magnanimous. He didn’t understand that what he was offering was a transfer from a small cage to a slighter bigger one.
She was not going to get the support she needed from Nadir. It didn’t matter that she was becoming addicted to his touch or that she felt closer to him than anyone else. She had to leave him or she would lose everything again.
CHAPTER TEN
ZOE’S polite smile was about to fall off as she said goodbye to her assistant and stepped into the penthouse the next afternoon. The moment she heard the elevator doors slide shut her shoulders sagged with relief.
“I swear, that woman is going to drive me crazy,” she muttered under her breath. She heard footsteps and saw the butler approach. Would she ever get a moment to herself? All she needed was one minute to disappear. Just one minute. Was that too much to ask?
“Your Highness,” the butler greeted her as he gave a bow and took her packages. “The Sheikh is in the drawing room.”
That surprised her. Zoe glanced at her wristwatch, but she still had plenty of time to prepare for the charity gala they had to attend. Why was Nadir here? Perhaps her question should be what rule had she broken this time to warrant Nadir’s early arrival?
She strode into the drawing room with her head held high. She knew she looked like a polished princess from head to toe, thanks to a day at the spa and salon. She had been on edge and impatient, waiting for a chance to run away, but that tenacious assistant had never allowed her a moment alone.
She halted when she saw Nadir stretched out on the long sofa. His jacket had been discarded and his tie was askew. A whisky tumbler sat on the ornate carpet by the sofa. His eyes were closed.
Now, her mind screamed as she stared at him. This is the minute you ‘ve been searching for. You will never see Nadir this unguarded again. Disappear!
She’d rolled back on her heel, prepared to make a dash for the elevator, when she studied his face. He looked exhausted and pale. The lines in his face we
re etched deep. Was he ill?
She pressed her lips together as she was swamped by indecision. Should she stay or should she go? She clenched her fists and sighed. She’d better not regret this choice, but if Nadir was unwell she needed to help him. She could find a different time to disappear. Hopefully.
“Is there something that you want?” Nadir asked. He didn’t move and he kept his eyes closed.
Zoe dipped her head. She should have known he’d been aware of her the moment she’d stepped into the room. Nothing got past him.
She slowly walked to the sofa, finding it strange to look down at him. “Are you feeling all right?” she asked. She placed a hand on his forehead. His skin was cool to the touch.
He caught her wrist in his firm grasp without opening his eyes. It was only then that she realized this was the first time in their marriage that she had reached out and touched him outside their bed. Zoe hoped Nadir didn’t read anything into that gesture. No, she decided. It would be beneath his notice.
“I’m fine,” he said. “I’m thinking about the next move in my negotiation strategy.”
“If you say so, but in Texas we call this a nap.” She gave a tug, but he didn’t release her. “I’m going to get ready for the gala.”
“I’m at stalemate,” he confessed wearily. “I can’t get them to accept my terms. And do you know why?”
She looked around the room. Was he talking to her? A Jazaari man didn’t discuss business with a woman. Everyone knew that. “Uh … no …?” she said tentatively as she checked for signs of delirium.
“They think that I hold the same antiquated beliefs as the Sultan. No one is willing to invest in Jazaar because they think nothing will change when I rule.” His eyes opened suddenly and his gaze held hers. “Do you think I’m a modern man?”
She felt his strong fingers around her wrist. She could lie, but he genuinely wanted her answer. “No.”
Nadir’s eyes narrowed. “No?”
Zoe gave another tug but couldn’t break free. Maybe she should have lied. “I think you are more forward-thinking than the men in Jazaar. But compared to the men in other countries, no, you aren’t modern.”
