Have Spacecat, Will Travel: And Other Tails
Page 23
“You know what I can do, I will fuck you up!” Reggie’s form flickered faster as rage overtook him.
“No, you won’t, dumbass, because you just let me send all your power beyond the veil. You were a bad motherfucker with thirty other ghosts to draw from, but now you’re alone, and just as fucking ridiculous as you were in life. I’m sorry you felt like I made your life hell, when all I ever did was be nice to you. No, I didn’t want to go out with you. But I didn’t hate you. I picked on you, like we picked on every member of the team. Allan pantsed every boy on the team. Hell, he even tried to pants Coach Howe. It wasn’t because he hated you; it was because he wanted you to feel like one of them. And Crystal stuffed half a dozen guys’ lockers full of panties, you weren’t special. It got to where if she didn’t put underwear in your locker, then you knew she didn’t like you. Nobody thought you were an outcast but you, Reggie. Well now you are. Have a nice time. I’ll be back in twenty years to see if you’ve grown up any.”
Jessica walked right through Reggie’s ghost to the end of the hall, pushed the door open, and stepped out into the predawn chill of the parking lot. “Can you hotwire a car?” she asked Mike’s ghost.
“Nope, but I can materialize enough for this.” He blinked out of existence and blinked back a moment later with the keys to their rental. “Don’t get used to it—that was a lot harder than I expected.”
Jessica got into the driver’s seat and put the car in gear. She adjusted the mirrors, taking one last look at the high school in the rearview mirror. She thought she could see the faintest image of a flickering light in the gymnasium windows as she started down the drive.
About the Author
John G. Hartness is a teller of tales, a righter of wrong, defender of ladies’ virtues, and some people call him Maurice, for he speaks of the pompatus of love. He is also the best-selling author of EPIC-Award-winning series The Black Knight Chronicles from Bell Bridge Books, a comedic urban fantasy series that answers the eternal question “Why aren’t there more fat vampires?” In July of 2016. John was honored with the Manly Wade Wellman Award by the NC Speculative Fiction Foundation for Best Novel by a North Carolina writer in 2015 for the first Quincy Harker novella, Raising Hell.
In 2016, John teamed up with a pair of other publishing industry ne’er-do-wells and founded Falstaff Books, a publishing company dedicated to pushing the boundaries of literature and entertainment.
In his copious free time John enjoys long walks on the beach, rescuing kittens from trees and getting caught in the rain. An avid Magic: the Gathering player, John is strong in his nerd-fu and has sometimes been referred to as “the Kevin Smith of Charlotte, NC.” And not just for his girth.
Find out more about John online
www.johnhartness.com
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Also by john G. hartness
THE BLACK KNIGHT CHRONICLES
The Black Knight Chronicles - Omnibus Edition
The Black Knight Chronicles Continues - Omnibus #2
All Knight Long - Black Knight Chronicles #7
BUBBA THE MONSTER HUNTER
Scattered, Smothered, & Chunked - Bubba the Monster Hunter Season One
Grits, Guns, & Glory - Bubba Season Two
Wine, Women, & Song - Bubba Season Three
Monsters, Magic, & Mayhem - Bubba Season Four
Born to Be Wild
Swamp Music
Houses of the Holy
Shinepunk: A Beauregard the Monster Hunter Collection
QUINCY HARKER, DEMON HUNTER
Year One: A Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter Collection
The Cambion Cycle - Quincy Harker, Year Two
Damnation - Quincy Harker Year Three
Salvation - Quincy Harker Year Four
Carl Perkins’ Cadillac - A Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter Novel
Inflection Point
Conspiracy Theory
Histories: A Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter Collection
SHINGLES
Zombies Ate My Homework: Shingles Book 5
Slow Ride: Shingles Book 12
Carnival of Psychos: Shingles Book 19
Jingle My Balls: Shingles Book 24
Snatched: Grandma Annie and the Cooter of Doom: Shingles Book 29
OTHER WORK
The True Confessions of Fandingo the Fantastical (with EM Kaplan)
Queen of Kats
Fireheart
Amazing Grace: A Dead Old Ladies Detective Agency Mystery
From the Stone
The Chosen
Hazard Pay and Other Tales
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PATRONS
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Collection Copyright © 2020 by John G. Hartness
“Have Spacecat, Will Travel” originally published in Salvage Universe, 2019 by Chris Kennedy Publishing
“Fair Play” originally published in The Big Bad: an Anthology of Evil by Dark Oak Press 2013
“On A Hill Far Away” originally published in Predators in Petticoats anthology 2019
“Walk the Dinosaur” originally published in Lawless Lands by Falstaff Books 2016
“Knight of the Green” originally published in Camelot 13 by Padwolf Publishing
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