Baby Zeke: The Diary of a Chicken Jockey: The Complete Minecraft Series, Books 1-9: An Unofficial Minecraft Book

by Dr. Block

  The minion paused for effect. It worked. What could Herobrine want that he would be willing to set us free?

  “Baby Zeke the chicken jockey,” intoned the minion. “You will go to the End and kill the Ender King.”

  “No!” I screamed.

  “In exchange, Herobrine will free you and your friends and let you live in peace for the remainder of your pathetic lives.”

  “I won’t do it,” I yelled. “The Ender King is my friend. The Ender King is the Protector!”

  The minion scowled at me. “Fine, then. I will kill each of your friends one by one while you watch and then I will kill you.” The minion moved toward Zeb’s cage.

  “No,” I shouted. “Stop. I … I’ll do it,” I said sadly.

  “Excellent,” said the minion. “You will go to the End and complete your mission. Once it is done, return and I shall free your friends.”

  “How can I trust you to keep your word?” I asked.

  The minion chuckled. “You cannot, but you must.”

  “Don’t do it, Zeke,” said Otis. “I’d rather die than help Herobrine.”

  “Me too,” said Bob.

  “Yes, indeed,” said Zeb.

  I nodded. “Thanks, guys. But, I can’t let you be killed. I have to stop it.”

  The golem approached my cage and opened it. Harold and I stepped out.

  “So, how do we get to the End?” I asked.

  The minion clapped his hands, and the golem pushed open the doors through which he had entered the room. Once they had opened fully, I could see an End portal had been built there.

  “Well, Harold, it looks like this may be our final adventure.”

  Harold looked at me with his black chicken eyes. “One way or another, I think you are right.”

  I got on Harold’s back. I turned to my friends. “Don’t worry. I’ll figure something out,” I said.

  They all waved at me, trying to look confident, but instead it felt like they were lowering me into a grave.

  I turned Harold around and we walked to the portal. We stood there for a moment, looking at the twelve multi-colored blocks framing the swirling blackness at the center of the portal.

  Harold stepped up onto the edge of the portal.

  I could feel the icy chill from the minion, who stood nearby watching us.

  Finally, I took a deep breath and said, “Go.”

  Harold jumped into the void.

  End of Book 7

  Book 8: End Times

  Chapter 1

  When Harold jumped into the End Portal, I did not know what to expect. I thought it might be like that time we went to the Nether, just a quick transport through a dark void.

  But, that is not what happened.

  Instead, we were floating or maybe a better word is “oozing” in a formless mass. What I mean is, it felt like the void had mass or density or something. I felt like something was pressing on me.

  I tried to say something to Harold, but my lips would not move. I tried to look down at Harold, but my head would not move. The only reason I knew Harold was there was because I could feel his back between my legs. I was still sitting on him.

  The void was dim, yet it was still possible to see due to some unknown light source. It was as if everything emitted an inner light while at the same time a dim light was cast upon everything.

  Super creepy.

  At first, I saw nothing but the gray darkness. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a shape. I moved my eyes to look at the shape. (This was the only part of my body over which I had control: my eyes.)

  What I saw made me scream. Or, at least, I would have screamed if I had been able to control my mouth. Instead, I had to scream inside my brain, which isn’t really a scream at all. I mean, have you ever been so scared you screamed? Part of the reason you scream is to release tension so you can think more clearly. All I could do is scream inside my head, which actually made it even more difficult to think.

  Was this what it was like to go crazy? I thought.

  I continued screaming inside my head as I looked at the thing coming closer and closer:

  Oh my Notch! I thought. What is that thing?

  The thing suddenly stopped its progress through the oozing void and paused, staring at me.

  “My name is Bobby the Head,” it said without moving its mouth. It was as if its voice was inside my head. Like its consciousness had entered my own.

  Get out of my head you ... head! I screamed inside my mind.

  “I am sorry,” said Bobby the Head. “I did not mean to frighten you.”

  Well, you did!

  “Good bye, Zeke,” said Bobby as he floated away.

  Wait! I yelled silently. How did you know my name?

  But, it was too late. Bobby the Head had already moved on to other things. I assumed he was going to float around terrifying anyone else who tried to enter the End.

  I continued to float through the dark ooze for what seemed like an eternity. I wondered if I would ever reach the End.

  Maybe Shadow, the evil minion of Herobrine, created a false End Portal.

  Maybe, when Harold and I jumped into the portal, Shadow knew we would never make it to the End.

  Maybe we will be trapped in this formless, oozing void forever!!!

  I began to panic. I wanted to breathe, but there was no air. It didn’t matter anyway because I could not control my lungs.

  My eyes darted back and forth, searching for some sign of hope. I desperately wanted to talk to Harold.

  Then, I had an idea. Maybe Harold could hear me if I directed my thoughts at him. Maybe I could speak inside of his head the way Bobby had spoken in mine. It was worth a try.

  I focused all of my attention on Harold’s tiny chicken head. I knew his pea brain was in there somewhere, so I tried to focus on the exact spot where I suspected his brain was. Then, I calmed by own screaming mind and tried to focus all of its power at Harold’s itty-bitty brain spot.

  Harold, I yelled. Harold, can you hear me? Speak to me, Harold. I am going insane.

  I waited in silence for a response. But, there was nothing. Either Harold was too crazed with fear to respond, or my attempt to communicate had failed.

  I had not been able to speak with Harold, but the effort had one positive result: the screaming in my mind had subsided. Now, it was more like a whimper of fear and regret rather than a scream of terror. I could think more clearly like this. Maybe I could figure a way out of this yet.

  Chapter 2

  Harold and I continued to float in the formless void. I had tried to puzzle an answer to our situation and our strange paralysis, but without results.

  I had seen nothing since Bobby the Head floated past. It seemed as if days had gone by since that terrifying moment. I really had no idea how much time had passed. Time had lost all meaning.

  If this void were really part of the passage to the End, I would have expected to see some players passing through, on their way to confront the Ender Dragon. But, I saw nothing. Nothing other than the heavy blackish-gray expanse of … of … whatever this place was.

  Just as I was about to give up and succumb to the madness of the void for all eternity, I heard something. Another voice. It was faint, as if it were in the distance rather than inside my head.

  We weren’t alone!

  Was this a good thing?

  I had no idea.

  I heard the voice as it grew louder. I still could not make out what it was saying, but there was no mistake, it was speaking. And, I just realized, it was approaching me from behind!

  Since I could not turn my head or move my body it would be able to sneak up on Harold and me without us knowing what it was and without being able to defend against it if it was evil.

  After some more time had passed, I was finally able to make out what it was saying.

  “If you aren’t going all the way, why go at all?”

  Was this unknown creature asking me that question?

  “In life,
there are three types of people: those who make it happen, those who watch it happen, and those who wonder what happened.”

  Wait, what? It sounded closer now.

  “The more difficult the victory, the greater the happiness in winning.”

  It sounded like it was directly behind me now, but what was its point? Why was it uttering these motivational statements? Why would it be in the void?

  And then, I felt its body drift next to my head. Its lips were right next to my ear, and it whispered, “May the odds be ever in your favor.”

  Huh?

  And, then, it drifted in front of my field of vision. He appeared somewhat blurry, but there was no doubt, he was an enderman.

  I looked at the small enderman’s eerie purple eyes, and suddenly, I could move!

  “What are you doing here?” I asked, pointing at him with my now mobile arms.

  “I could ask you the same question,” said the small, young enderman. (Or, maybe I should call it an enderboy.)

  “We are trying to get to the End,” I said, looking down at Harold who was finally able to look up at me.

  “Why?” asked the little enderboy.

  “We just … uh ... want to check it out,” said Harold.

  “Yeah,” I added. “We heard it was like totally different from the Overworld.” No way I am going to tell him we’re supposed to kill the Ender King.

  “Well, I know nothing of this Overworld of which you speak” said the enderboy, “but, I will say it is weird that you are here, in the end nectar. I’ve never heard of any mobs in the nectar other than endermen.”

  “End nectar?” I asked, completely at a loss.

  “It is where endermen go after they are killed. They float in the nectar regenerating and reciting motivational quotations until they are ready to respawn,” said the young enderman.

  “Really?” I said. “By Notch’s beard, how did we get here?!?”

  The young enderman blinked his spooky purple eyes and said, “I do not know.”

  “By the way, what is your name?” asked Harold.

  “Max. What is yours?”

  “I’m Harold, and this is Zeke.”

  Max looked at us more closely. His purple eyes blinked rapidly, and he teleported to different spots around us and stuck his face near our bodies inspecting us. It was kind of weird, but we all know endermen are a bit peculiar.

  “I have heard of you, I think,” said Max. “I have no memories from my previous life, except that I have lived before and am now in the process of respawning. However, for some reason, I feel that I met you in my previous life.”

  “Maybe you helped us battle Herobrine when he was trying to activate the mysterious objects?” I suggested.

  “I do not know who this Herobrine person is,” said Max.

  “You will once you respawn,” I said. “Everyone knows who Herobrine is.”

  “If you say so,” said Max with a shrug.

  “Say, uh, Max, can you help us get out of the nectar and to the End?” asked Harold.

  Max laughed. “That’s easy. Just tap your feet together three times and say ‘there’s no place like home’.”

  “Will that really work?” I asked. “I mean, the End is not our home.”

  Max looked confused. “I do not know. Maybe you can say, ‘there’s no place like the End’?”

  I looked down at Harold. “It’s worth a shot, right?” I said.

  Harold nodded.

  Harold tapped his chicken feet together three times and we both began to chant, “There’s no place like the End. There’s no place like the End. There’s no place like –.”

  Chapter 3

  The next thing we knew, we had arrived. There before us was the End in all its glory.

  I was being sarcastic there about the “glory” and all.

  Honestly, the End looked pretty boring, which was a surprise because the few endermen I have met seemed pretty dominant. I had just assumed they must come from a visually stunning place.

  Totally. Wrong.

  Everything in the End was the same brownish color, except for some black rocks and the groups of pitch black endermen aimlessly milling about.

  “Whoa,” I said to Harold. “This place is dull. D. U. L. L. Dull.”

  “Yeah, I don’t see anything other than brown, black and purple.”

  We ducked behind a brown pile of rocks. I pulled some raw cow flesh from my inventory. It smelled pretty funky. I could tell it was rotten, which was awesome because, as we zombies like to say, there’s no flesh like rotten flesh.

  “I think I’m going to be sick,” said Harold, putting a wing over his nose and turning away.

  “Dude, relax,” I said with my mouth full of the savory, tender delight that is rotten cow flesh. “I don’t make fun of you when you eat seeds. Talk about gross.”

  “So, anyway,” said Harold, “are we really going to kill the Ender King?”

  I shook my head. “How could we? Even if we wanted to, there is no way two little pathetic weaklings like us could do it. Don’t you remember how huge he was able to make himself?”

  “Yeah, I do,” said Harold, a note of sadness in his voice. “What can we do then? If we don’t kill the Ender King, Shadow will kill our friends.”

  I smacked my lips with satisfaction as I finished that last bit of rotten cow meat. “Simple. We need to find the Ender King and get him to help us defeat Shadow and rescue our friends.”

  “You really think he will help?” asked Harold.

  “I hope so,” I said. “He’s not much of a Protector if he doesn’t.”

  “Protector?” asked Harold. “What are you talking about???”

  “Something Zeb told me once. He said: “The world is in a delicate balance. Mobs kill villagers. Players help defend villagers by killing mobs. Villagers trade with players. The three spokes -- mobs, villagers, players -- balance each other. And, there is the Overworld, the Nether and the End. Another balance of three. The final and most important trinity consists of Notch the Creator, Herobrine the Destroyer, and the Ender King the Protector.”

  Harold started to twitch. I could tell my knowledge bomb was going to take him a while to process. “Mind blown. Mind blown,” whispered Harold.

  “Yeah, that’s how I felt. Super crazy cool, right?”

  Harold continued to twitch. I was beginning to think something in his mind really had broken, but soon noticed the haze in his eyes starting to clear. He would be okay.

  “Anyway,” I said, “let’s ask one of these endermen where we can find His Highness. We need all the protection we can get.”

  I stood up and walked out from behind a rock. I strolled up to the nearest enderman, who was looking the other way. I tapped him on his arm. He turned around.

  I looked up at him. I stared into his glowing purple eyes and asked, “Can you tell me where the Ender King lives?”

  The enderman looked at me for a moment without saying anything, and then began to shriek, “Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate!”

  I jumped backward as the enderman tried to grab me with his long, sinewy arms. “Was it something I said?” I asked as I turned and ran back to where Harold was hidden behind the rock.

  The enderman continued to yell, “Exterminate!” He was soon joined by about a dozen endermen in the immediate vicinity. They all teleported near me and chanted, “Exterminate! Exterminate!”

  I hopped on Harold. “Run!” I yelled.

  Harold ran as quickly as he could away from the endermen. But, every time we opened a good-sized gap, they teleported to within a block or two. They continued to shriek, “Exterminate! Exterminate!”

  “Oh my Notch, Zeke, this is crazy,” panted Harold.

  “Yeah, I don’t see any place to hide,” I said. “Keep running.”

  Harold did his best, but I could feel him beginning to tire. It would not be long before the gang of endermen caught us. I assumed they meant what they said and our time was running out.

  Tha
t was when I heard a voice. “Hey, you,” it said. “Over here.”

  I swiveled my head in all directions looking for the source of the voice. I couldn’t see anything. “Where?” I shouted.

  “Here,” said the voice again.

  This time, I saw a long black arm waving at me from behind some rocks. I pointed to it. “Over there, Harold.”

  Harold turned sharply and headed in the direction of the waving arm.

  “Do you think it’s safe?” he asked.

  “I don’t know,” I said. “But if we stay out here, we’re dead. It’s our only chance.”

  Harold nodded and put his head down. He summoned a reserve of energy and dashed toward the waving arm. Up ahead, we saw a small cave entrance with a black arm sticking out of it.

  “There,” I said. “Into the cave.”

  Harold did not hesitate and went straight for the cave.

  The sound of the chanting endermen grew quiet as we disappeared into the cave. Apparently, with no prey in sight, they returned to their normal passive state.

  I looked at the face of our savior. It was an enderman with a red bow in its hair.

  “I didn’t know endermen wore bows,” I said.

  “Ha!” laughed the enderman. “I am not an enderman. I am an endergirl.”

  Chapter 4

  “An endergirl?” I said. “I did not know there was such a thing.”

  “Well, half of the endermen you see are actually enderwomen. Only enders can tell themselves apart. We all look the same to outsiders,” she explained.

  “Okay, so why are you wearing a bow?” I asked.

  “My dad makes me wear it so visitors can tell me apart from my brothers.” She kicked the dirt. “I wish he’d make them wear bows. It’s so unfair.”

  “Thanks for rescuing us, uh … uh … what’s your name, anyway?” said Harold.