Corporate Daddy
Page 11
He was on his sixth lap when Amanda Sue grew restive. “Daddy, Daddy!” she called, but Emily doubted that he could hear her over the sounds of his own strokes. She began to whisper to the child about what a strong, powerful swimmer her daddy was, pointing out how his arms cleaved the water, head turning side to side, legs scissoring beneath the water. Amanda Sue studied him as if she actually understood all that Emily was saying, but every time he drew near the shallow corner where they sat, she called to him again. Finally, he stood and waded toward them, water sheeting off his body and flattening the dark hair dusting his chest. He was breathing heavily, but he had a smile for his daughter.
“Time to go, sweetheart. Daddy’s ready for a nap.”
“Nap no,” Amanda Sue said, reaching for him. “Grink. Num-num.”
“Okay, drinks and yum-yums first,” he said, wading toward the steps, “then nap.”
Emily followed behind them, feeling oddly forgotten and superfluous. Logan carried his daughter into the open shower with him, then stripped away her sodden romper, diapered her and dressed her in the dry clothing he’d brought with them, while Emily rinsed off the chlorine all alone, wrapped a towel around her head and pulled her jeans on over her wet suit. He brought Amanda Sue to her so he could go into the locker room and change. He returned wearing jeans and a sweatshirt, his wet suit rolled into a towel. Emily had dried and fluffed Amanda Sue’s hair with a towel, then thrown on a terry-cloth jacket that belted at the waist. They stepped into shoes and headed out.
By the time they got back to the house, Emily’s teeth were chattering. Logan ordered her into the bedroom to get changed and dry her hair while he fixed Amanda Sue a snack. She found the hair-dryer right where he said it would be, but it was a low voltage, handheld comb-type, and by the time her long, thick hair was dry enough to endure, some considerable time had passed. She quickly stripped off her suit in his bathroom, then dragged on underwear, damp jeans and a big, roomy, moss-green sweater. When she opened the door and stepped out into the bedroom, Logan was there, waiting.
Suddenly her heart was pounding, her chest too tight to breathe. He leaned a hip against the corner of the dresser and folded his arms determinedly. She fought the urge to gulp and struggled to keep her tone light and casual. “Where’s Amanda Sue?”
“Sleeping.”
She nodded. “Sorry I took so long. It’s all this hair.” He said nothing to that, so she busied herself stowing her wet suit and towel in the bag, making small talk to cover the electricity arcing through the air. “I knew she was exhausted, poor thing, but she really seemed to enjoy the pool. We probably shouldn’t have kept her in so long. I’m pretty tired myself, so I know you must be.” She gathered her things and moved toward the door, smiling lamely. He stepped in front of her. She looked up, both dismayed and thrilled to see the look on his face.
“Say my name,” he demanded huskily, taking the bag from her hands and tossing it away.
She blinked up at him. “What?”
“Say my name,” he repeated, holding her gaze with his. “You rarely call me by name.” His hand rose and hovered around her shoulder, brushing gently at her hair. “I want to hear it.” He cupped her face with his palm, urging, “Say my name.”
She didn’t know how to refuse. She closed her eyes and whispered, “Logan.”
“Again,” he insisted, sliding his hand around to the nape of her neck, threading his fingers through her hair. She knew what he wanted, and it was more than she could give him. She opened her eyes, intent on honesty and good sense.
“Logan, I—”
He kissed her, his hand bringing her face to meet his. Good sense retreated as sensation charged in, and she found herself kissing him back. His free hand covered her breast, the very breast that Amanda Sue had so innocently exposed, and Emily knew that she’d been waiting for it, needing it. When he pulled back and his hands fell to the bottom of her sweater, she knew she couldn’t allow him to do what he was doing, but somehow her arms rose as he pulled the sweater up. Then he was tossing it away.
“Logan, I can’t—” she began, but his mouth came to hers once again, his hands sliding over bare skin as they circled her torso. She didn’t even realize that he’d unfastened her bra until he shoved it away. She tried once more to resist, gasping, “Logan, wait.” But then his hands cupped and lifted her breasts, and lightning shot through her, throwing her head back and stopping her heart.
“Beautiful,” he said in a choked voice. “Sweet heaven, I want you!”
He backed her against the bed and toppled her over. Pulling his T-shirt over his head, he followed her down, bracing his upper body weight on his elbows.
“I want to make love to you, Em. Let me make love to you.”
She could feel herself melting, opening, surrendering. Frightened, she lifted both hands to his chest, holding him off. “I can’t.”
“I need you, Em,” he told her, holding her with his eyes as surely as his body. “I always have, but now more than ever.”
“I can’t,” she said, breathlessly desperate. “You’re my boss.”
He pushed her hands away and lowered his head, rolling it gently side to side, nuzzling her breasts, scorching her with his breath. “We’re a team,” he said, “a good one, the best.”
“You’re my…boss,” she repeated. And you’ll never love me.
“I want to be more,” he whispered, his mouth bathing the peak of one breast with moist heat. She was drowning, sinking. Frantically, she dug her hands into the mattress, shoving herself backward, dragging her body against his. He crawled after her, over her. She scrambled backward and right off the side of the bed. He let her go, collapsing onto his side with a huff of disappointment. She got her feet under her and careened away, bouncing off the wall and the corner of the bed, her hands covering her breasts. Logan rolled onto his back, the heels of his hands pressed into the hollows of his eyes.
She saw her sweater hanging off the edge of the dresser and lunged toward it, yanking it on even as she dipped down to scoop up her bra and cram it into her rear pocket. He came up into a sitting position then, and she leaped back. He looked away, a muscle working in the hollow of his jaw. “That’s just great. I want to make love to you, and you recoil like I’m going to beat you.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, stepping closer again. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Oh, that’s better,” he drawled cryptically. “You just can’t stand for me to touch you.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, either,” she said softly.
He looked at her then, accusing her with his eyes, a thin veneer of anger doing little to disguise the bitter frustration beneath. She had to lace her fingers together to keep from reaching out to him. “You know I want you to touch me.”
He shifted and reached out. “Then what—”
She stepped back, trying not to skitter. “Just because we both want it doesn’t mean that it’s right,” she explained quickly. “You’re my employer, Logan, and that’s a real problem for me. My career is important to me. I’ve worked hard, and I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished.”
“You can’t think this is about sleeping your way to the top,” he said scathingly.
“Not at this moment,” she said, “but later, when I’m ready to move up, would you be able to turn me down if I wasn’t right for the position?”
“That won’t happen. I haven’t found anything you can’t do and do well.”
“Maybe. You can’t know what’s coming, though, neither of us can. And it’s more than just the job.”
He frowned, but he folded his hands in a sign of patience. “What then?”
“I’m not comfortable with casual affairs.”
“You find something casual about this?” he demanded.
She ignored that. “We’re not really suited for one another, Logan. Without Amanda Sue, we’d never have gotten to this place.”
He couldn’t deny that, and he didn’t try. “Amanda Sue ma
y have brought us together like this, but—”
“It’s the situation, Logan,” she argued. “Can’t you see that? You never looked twice at me until I came into your home and Amanda Sue opened a place in your heart you’d never have willingly opened yourself.”
Again, he couldn’t argue. He sat silently for a moment, then quietly asked, “What if I told you that I was afraid to look too closely at you, Em? That I think I always knew deep down that this would happen if I did?”
She smiled wanly. “I’d say that you’re as good as your reputation.”
He bowed his head. After a moment he got up. “I’m not sure I can put the genie back in the bottle,” he said, “but I’ll try if that’s what you want.”
Emily swallowed relief. “Thank you,” she whispered. He picked up her bag and handed it to her, careful that their hands didn’t touch.
“Will I see you in the morning?” he asked.
“Of course.”
He nodded and stepped aside, his gaze averted. Emily slipped from the room and grabbed her coat up off the living room chair. She was hurrying down the walk toward her car when the disappointment caught up with her, but even as the tears clouded her vision, she knew she’d done the right thing. She couldn’t doubt it. But, oh, how she wished it could be different! If only he could love her as she loved him, but she had more sense than to believe that. For two years now she’d watched him wander from one affair to another. She knew who and what he was. Amanda couldn’t have changed him that much.
But even as the denial grew within her, she felt the truth echoing in her heart. If only he could love her as she loved him. If only. If only.
She was at the town house by seven Monday morning. Logan was dressed for the office, a bath towel draped across his chest and clothespinned at his shoulders.
“I’m feeding Amanda Sue her breakfast,” he explained with a wry grin.
She followed him into the house, wagging the heavy bag in which her lazy cat reclined contentedly. She put the bag down in the living room, then accompanied Logan to the kitchen. When they walked in Amanda Sue opened her mouth like a nestling spying the mother bird’s approach. Laughing, Logan sat down and forked up a syrupy piece of toaster waffle, which explained the elaborate protective measures for his clothing.
“She slept through dinner last night,” he explained. “I thought it was best not to wake her. Obviously we overtired her in the pool yesterday. So she was up with the birdies this morning, demanding the early worm.” Amanda Sue was practically gulping the mushy waffle bites. Logan carefully spaced them to keep her from choking and offered her sips of milk at intervals. When she began to slow down, he began to speak again. “I want to discuss something with you. Unless you object, I want to use our own personnel department to screen the nanny applicants. They’ll have to outsource the applications, of course, but I think they’ll be able to weed out the obvious losers for us. It may take some time for them to come up with some prospects, however. I hope that’s all right.”
“It’s fine by me,” she said, helping herself to coffee from the pot he’d made.
Amanda Sue was through, so he removed the towel, got up and carried it to the sink, where he wet one corner before carrying it back to Amanda Sue’s chair. Apparently she’d been so hungry that she hadn’t fought him for possession of the eating utensils and food that morning, because he had only to wipe her face and hands to have her cleaned up.
“One more thing,” he said, pulling his daughter out of her chair and setting her on her feet. “My housekeeper will be in this morning. I’ve explained the situation, so she’s expecting you. I just wanted to be sure you were expecting her.”
“That’s fine.”
Amanda Sue dropped down and crawled under the table.
“Her name’s Consuelo,” Logan said, folding the towel, “but she prefers Connie.”
“Connie, right.”
Goody finally put in an appearance, slipping into the room on silent cat paws and heading straight for Amanda Sue beneath the table. The child let out a yelp of delight, and Emily went down on her haunches to observe the meeting. Goody circled Amanda Sue, rubbing against her shoulders and chest, before plopping down across her legs with a sweep of her tail. Amanda Sue patted the cat’s side and wrapped an arm around its neck. Goody purred and pretended not to be enraptured. Emily shook her head in wonder.
“A mutual admiration society,” Logan observed, stooping to peer beneath the table.
“Absolutely. I’ve never seen Goody take to anyone like this, not even me.”
“Well, that’s my Amanda Sue for you,” Logan said proudly. He reached out for her. “Come on, sweetheart. Daddy has to go.”
“Go,” Amanda Sue said, crawling out from under both the cat and the table.
Logan swept her up into a fierce hug. “Umm. I love you, ’Manda mine, but I have to go to work. Emily’s here to spend the day with you.”
“Go,” Amanda Sue said, reaching toward the door. “Mon Mimy.”
“Not this time, baby,” Logan said. “Daddy has to get some real work done for a change. You stay here and play with Emily.”
Emily stepped up and offered her arms. “Goody wants to play. Let’s go play with Goody.”
Amanda Sue leaned into Emily’s arms, acquiescing calmly. “Gooey! Pway. Mon.”
Logan kissed his daughter’s cheek and turned away. Two steps later, he turned back, but this time his regard was all for Emily. With a sigh, he retraced his steps, bowed his head and kissed her on the forehead. “I may be your boss,” he said, “but I’m also your friend. I’d be the worst sort of ingrate not to feel that much. You may not want more from me, and that’s fine, but you’ll just have to deal with at least this much.”
She smiled, deeply touched. “Have a good day,” she whispered.
Nodding, he skimmed a hand over the braid hanging between her shoulder blades and took his leave with a wave to his daughter. “See you later, angel. Both of you.”
The day passed quickly. When Logan walked in the door at twenty minutes past five, Emily walked out ten minutes later, minus her magically disappearing cat. “You’ll just be bringing her back tomorrow,” Logan pointed out. “She might as well stay.” He didn’t say that Emily might as well stay, too, but the thought was there, unacknowledged, between them.
Tuesday followed much the same pattern as Monday. On Wednesday she took Amanda Sue into the office to meet a prospective nanny. Hal had a notepad full of questions for Emily, and she felt gratified to find that she was not as easily replaced as it had seemed. The nanny said that she preferred to work with newborn infants but would consider Amanda Sue if nothing else came up in the immediate future. Logan told her that wouldn’t be necessary, and Emily fully agreed. Three more applicants were interviewed during those next two days. One of them was, frankly, perfect, but Emily couldn’t bring herself to argue when Logan passed up the young, pretty, Swiss-educated woman on the grounds that she might eventually decide to return to Europe. Emily hated to admit, even to herself, that she couldn’t bear the thought of Logan actually living with such an attractive female. Simply put, she would be jealous of any woman who possessed any chance of fixing Logan’s interest, which was more than enough reason to refuse Logan’s invitation to accompany him and Amanda Sue to the ranch for the weekend.
“Mom’s called nearly every day,” he said, telling Emily nothing she didn’t already know. “Now she says she’s given us long enough to make the adjustment and it’s time to introduce her granddaughter to the rest of the family. I can’t argue with that.”
“I agree,” Emily said from the armchair in his living room. “It’s time the rest of the Fortunes knew what a treasure they’ve got, but I really can’t go.”
“May I ask why?” Logan pressed gently, watching Amanda Sue pretend to be a cat and Goody pretend not to notice.
“I’m hoping to get together with Cathy,” she said.
He nodded. “Is that the only reason?”
“No.”
Sighing, he folded his hands. “Well, have a good weekend, anyway.”
“You, too,” she said, getting up to go.
He plucked Amanda Sue off the floor and followed Emily to the door. “Tell Emily ’bye,” he instructed sweetly. Amanda Sue hugged Emily’s neck and kissed her.
“’Bye-bye, sweetheart. See you Monday.”
“We’ll miss you,” Logan said just before she went out the door. She tried not to look back—and failed.
I’ll miss you, too, her heart whispered. I already do.
Eight
“Eden.” Logan threw his free arm around his younger sister’s neck and hugged her, knocking his hat askew. “Haven’t seen you lately. How are you?”
She laughed, and the sound of it was so infectious that Logan laughed, too. “Well and busy,” Eden said. “I’ve so wanted to meet my niece, but Mom asked all of us to give you some time alone with her.” She pulled back when Amanda Sue shoved at her. “Possessive already, sweetheart?” She grinned at Logan. “You always did have a way with the opposite sex, didn’t you, brother dear? And your little girl seems to have fallen victim like all the rest.”
“Well, not all the rest,” Logan muttered, thinking of Emily, but then he smiled and stepped through the open doorway of his mother’s large Colonial-style home. Eden shut the door. Obviously she had been watching for him, anxious to be the first to make the acquaintance of her niece. He didn’t disappoint her. Tugging his hat into place, he said, “Amanda Sue, this is your aunt Eden.” Amanda Sue put her hand in her mouth and stared, wide-eyed, at the dark-haired Eden.