Need Us (Make or Break #4)

by Amanda Heath

  I swallow around the lump that has formed in my throat. Never once has Mari asked about what Maggie and I do together. Not that she knows anything to begin with. I’ve never touched Maggie when my sister was around. She knew what was going on before I did.

  Maggie raises both her eyebrows. Maggie doesn’t take shit from anybody. And I mean that. Everyone is scared of Mari BUT Maggie. I think that’s why they don’t get along, really. They both think they’re bad bitches. Fucking ridiculous. “And what truth would that be?”

  Mari’s smirk grows bigger and she throws her arms out in all her dramatic fashion. “That you’ve been screwing my brother for damn near two years.”

  My palms start to get sweaty and I wonder if I ran in the other direction would I make it out of here before my entire life fell apart. Maggie purses her lips and then shrugs her shoulders. “Can’t say that I have. I wouldn’t touch Max if he was the last guy on earth.” Then she walks up to Mari and yanks her bag away. She digs around inside until she brings out the little black box that holds her charcoal. “You should know I have a little dirt on you. So I’d watch your mouth if you don’t want anything sordid spread around the school.” Then she taps Mari on the head and walks away.

  “What the fuck just happened?” Mari whispers, looking at me. “I could have sworn the two of you were getting it on. I mean, come on, even Mom can feel the sexual tension between you two.”

  I cringe at that one. My mom doesn’t need to know who I have sexual tension with. No one needs to know but Maggie and me.

  I ignore her and Seth. I leave the school and head out to my truck. Mari likes to tell people I’m over compensating for something with my supped up truck but that’s simply not true. I just like to have a vehicle that has enough room for me. I’m a big guy; I don’t want to feel cramped in something smaller.

  I head home in a bad mood. I can’t believe my sister said that about Maggie and me. I know it’s true but it seems kind of like a betrayal. Like she wants us to get caught or something. I would never rat her out for something like that. Hell, I wouldn’t ever rat her out in the first place, about anything.

  My dad is the band director over at Meadows so he’s probably got practice scheduled this afternoon. My mom probably has a board meeting or something to attend. They are hardly ever home before six on the weekdays. Which means we always have to do something together over the weekend. Before we head off to a party or something. Don’t tell them that though.

  I’m not going to lie, I about shit my pants when I open my bedroom door and Maggie is laying on my bed. Those blue-green eyes are so full of mischief and secrets. She knows everything about everyone. I think she would have to though, considering how much time she spends drifting through the hallways, unnoticed.

  “You here to bitch at me?” I ask, dropping my bag near the door. I look down at my watch and see the time is only three thirty. We have plenty of time for whatever she’s in the mood for. When she shakes her head I take a step closer to her. “You here to fuck?”

  “Yeah,” she says, sitting up and taking her shirt off over her head. She’s wearing the black and red bra I love so much. Not that I would ever tell her that. I don’t know what it is about us. I hate that we are like this because the more time I spend with her, the more I want more than this. I want to be with her and that scares the crap out of me.

  Not only would my dad kill me, her dad would come after me as well. I think my mom would cry in happiness or something though. She always tells me how lonely I am, that I need to find a nice girl to go out with. I hate to tell her I don’t want to go out, I want to stay in with Maggie. I think that’s just the kind of jerk that I am.

  My shirt comes up over my head and before I know it, I’m on top of her. My lips meet hers in a rush and I’m shucking my pants down my legs with my feet and one hand. Her hands go into my hair, pulling at the strands just a little bit. I groan all the same though. When she touches me, I lose my goddamn mind. I can’t explain it in words, not really. Fireworks go off, that’s the closest I can get.

  “How do you want it, bad girl?” I whisper against her lips. Then I pull up to look down at her. Sometimes I can’t think and I get distracted because all I can see are blue-green eyes. Sometimes I know in my heart that she’s more than a fuck buddy. Inside this body of mine, I know I’m in love with her and that I always have been. Every good memory I have from my childhood involves her somehow.

  She’s panting and moaning because I’m playing with her nipples, which I’ve shoved aside her bra to play with. I can’t tell you when I started calling her bad girl. It seems it’s always been her nickname. It’s always been a part of who we are. “Slow,” she says, taking my hand away from her breasts and moving it down to her jeans.

  Maggie has this whole emo/Goth thing going on. She dyes the ends of her hair black, she always has a black band t-shirt on and all this black eyeliner on. I don’t mind it though, because I know how fucking beautiful she really looks, without all that shit.

  Our lips meet again as I pull her jeans down to her ankles. Like most days she isn’t wearing panties. I use my hand to glide along my dick once, twice before I push it into her.

  We might not always get along but we had the protection talk. We were both virgins before we ended up here. And she’s been on the pill since the third time we fucked.

  I do what she asks and take it slow. As slow as I can what with her silky walls clutching at me. Her hands move over my body, like they do every time. She just can’t stop touching me. I like it though; I’ve always liked her hands on me.

  I watch her pretty red nipples move with her bouncing breasts, mesmerized by the sight. Her hand comes over my head and down my face. Her finger ends up in my mouth and I suck it in. I thrust my hips to the rhythm of my sucking.

  After awhile I’ve had enough of this slow shit. So I sit back on my calves and raise her legs up and on my shoulders. Then I hold her against me while I pound into her. I watch as her eyes roll back into her head while she comes. I join her because I can’t hold it back anymore.

  When I come back to reality I’m lying on top of her with her arms around me. She’s still touching me everywhere she can. It spreads tingles up and down my spine. “Why do you think Mari waited until today to say anything?” she asks me.

  I lean down and kiss her gently. We have this tender thing going on after we fuck. Like we actually sit here and talk and cuddle. It’s fucking weird. Sometimes Maggie feels more like my secret girlfriend than my enemy. In fact, she hasn’t truly felt like my enemy since the day before we fucked.

  “I don’t know. But she is Mari so there is no telling.” I roll off of her and land on my back. I pull her against me and close my eyes. “I’m fucking tired. Let’s go to sleep.”

  “What about your parents?” She doesn’t say what about Mari. Mari already knows, she’s just playing with us. I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone knows. We try really hard to hide it but there is only so much a person can hide when you spend so much time with these people.

  “They won’t be home till six. It’s four now. I’ll set my alarm for an hour.” Then we fall asleep cuddled around each other. I like her like this. All soft against me, smelling like wildflowers. And charcoal, she always smells like charcoal.

  Everything goes fine right up until this moment. The moment we have to go from secret to out in public. This happens when my mom walks into my room at four thirty. An hour and half before she is even supposed to be home.

  “Maximus Adam Sanders! Please for the love of god tell me that isn’t fucking Maggie Southerland!” My eyes pop open to see my mom standing in the doorway looking horrified.

  Fuck.

  Maggie is a very heavy sleeper, so she doesn’t even flinch. “Mom, give me a minute,” I whisper. No need to get Ashley involved in this conversation. She’d only make it worse or some shit.

  Mom nods and leaves the room. I quietly pull my clothes on and head out of the room, closing the door behind me. I pat
the picture of Trey, my mom’s long dead boyfriend; it’s actually a ritual I have. I feel like he’ll bring me good luck, considering he’s the first guy to win over my mom.

  I find her sitting in the kitchen with a sad look on her face. In fact she’s got tears running down her face. I sigh and sit across from her on the bar. “I know it’s a big deal, but I don’t think it’s worth crying over.”

  She reaches across the space and puts her hand on top of mine. “I just wasn’t ready, baby. I wasn’t ready to see you like that, not that I would ever be, but I should have expected it. I thought I saw her car down the road.”

  “You expected to find us like that one day?” I ask confused. That’s a pretty big expectation.

  She nods and wipes away some more tears. “You two, you’ve always had it. Even when you were both tiny, it was there. It wasn’t always sexual, at least, I fucking hope not.”

  I raise an eyebrow and cross my arms over my chest, leaving my mom’s hand to fall to the bar top. “What have we always had?”

  She gets up off the bar stool and crosses over to look out the window over the sink. “This connection. I don’t know what started it. But even when both of you were little, you’d follow each other around. And as you got older, you’d always be looking for her and she’d be looking for you. It honestly scared me quite a bit.”

  I think about what she says and I find she has a point. It has always been there. I think that’s why I always knew where Mari was going to be. I had to hide it from Mari because she’d either make fun of me or get jealous.

  Wait…

  “Is that why Mari and Maggie hate each other?” I feel like all the blood has drained from my face. I can’t be the reason for that. I just can’t be. That’s ridiculous.

  Mom looks at me over her shoulder and gives me a smile. “Among other things. But yes, I think that’s the reason it all started. They didn’t, and don’t, know how to share you.”

  That just seems like so much wasted time. The two of them have a lot in common, I hate that they can’t be friends because of me. “Are you going to tell Dad?” I ask. My dad is a big guy and he scares me. I don’t think he’d actually hurt me, but since Maggie is his best friend’s little girl and his son took her virginity; I might be looking for the fight of my life.

  “Nope. You two are. You two are going to sit down and tell your fathers together. You two need to stop hiding behind closed doors and come out in the open. Relationships are no fun when they’re secrets.” She leaves the sink finally and comes around to my side of the bar. She wraps her arms around me and puts her nose in my hair. I have to smile at that. She says she has to get a big whiff of me or she might forget what I smell like before I’ll let her hug me again. “I’m not so sure either of your fathers will understand but I’ll be there and so will Aunt Paisley. We’ll set them straight.”

  I nod and leave the kitchen after I let mom hug me again. I know I’m eighteen years old but sometimes you just need to hug your mom. Maggie is still asleep when I get back to my room. I lay down softly next to her and just stare at her. And I know, I know that I’ve always loved her. I was just scared. Scared of our parents, scared of what Mari would think. But mostly I was scared because I shouldn’t have felt so strongly for this girl when I was so young. I wanted to live my life, you know? Not spend it with one girl, but even I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t ever be with anyone else. I feel it down to my bones.

  Maggie shifts seconds before her eyes open. The blue-green orbs look at me and while she doesn’t smile, her eyes do. And that’s when I blurt it out like a fucking girl. “I love you, Maggie.”

  She sits up so fast I’m worried she’ll get whiplash. I sit up myself and just stare at her while she stares at me, both in silence.

  Then she does something she’s never done before. She leans into me and puts her head on my shoulder. “I’ve been waiting for you to figure that out.”

  I grin and look down at her. “You have, have you?”

  She nods and gives me a little smile back. “I knew it a few weeks ago. Mari was bitching at me for something; I probably stole something and couldn’t find it to return it. But that doesn’t matter.” She laughs against me and I vow to always find a way to make her laugh, because it’s such a magical sound. “Then you walk by and somehow I just know. You looked at me and smiled. Not your wicked grin, but a real smile like you were happy to see me. Then you grabbed my hand when Mari wasn’t looking and I just knew. It’s taken me a lot not to just blurt it out.”

  I raise a brow. “Maybe you should have. I hate that I had my head shoved so far up my ass.”

  She rises in front of me and cups my face. “You would have ran in the other direction. I know you though, I knew you’d come around soon enough.”

  “I guess we can thank my mom.” I raise my hands up and wrap them around her wrists. “She walked in while you were asleep. She’s making us tell our dads.”

  “You don’t have anything to worry about.” She laughs at my confused expression. “A long time ago, Daddy told me you were the only boy he’d trust me with. I don’t think he was talking about the sex thing but you get the point.”

  “Oh so this should be fun? Are you serious right now? They are both going to kill me,” I tell her as she drops her hands from my face and moves off the bed.

  She makes sure she’s looking in my eyes while she pulls her jeans back on. “I love you, Maximus. I have my entire life. He’ll get over any hang-ups he has real fast. I have the man wrapped around my finger and I have since the day I was born.”

  I love to hear the story about how the four of us were born. You see our three sets of parents were pregnant at the same time. Mom went during the baby shower that was being thrown for all three pregnancies. Aunt Rach went during Channing and Paisley’s wedding. And Paisley went during their honeymoon.

  I get off the bed and lean in and kiss her softly. “God I hope that’s fucking true.”

  Mari

  My parents seriously gross me out. I swear every time I walk into this house they are making out somewhere. It’s a wonder Max and I don’t have three hundred brothers and sisters. But I guess you can control that kind of thing if you try hard enough. They just can’t seem to control their hormones. They are middle aged and have two eighteen-year-old kids. You’d think they’d stop kissing and touching once they hear a door open or close.

  I put my hands on my hips and clear my throat. Daddy finally looks up at me and grins like the idiot he is. “Mari, baby. When did you get home?”

  I roll my eyes. “Like ten minutes ago. I’ve been clearing my throat the whole time.”

  Mom giggles and moves away from my dad. He sticks his tongue out at me and leaves the room. Mom’s stirring a huge pot and I nearly groan. When she’s cooking in that pot that means the entire family is coming over for dinner. “Max and Maggie finally came out of the closet didn’t they?” I sneer and finally drop my purse on the counter. The damn thing is heavy.

  Mom’s mouth pops open and she looks at me funny. “You knew? And you didn’t tell me?” She has a point really. I’ve known pretty much since it happened. And I do tell Mom everything. Only this was Max’s secret. And we made a pact when we were little.

  Always tell the truth. Never spill a secret.

  Now, Max isn’t lying because I’ve never directly asked him about Maggie. I’ve always hounded Maggie about it. I should really stop being so mean to her. She’s going to be my sister-in-law one day just you wait and see. I just don’t like having to share my brother. And ever since he started screwing her, I’ve been left out more. Though that’s a part of growing up.

  “Who’s all coming?” I ask, directing her attention somewhere else. I love both my parents with all my heart but I’m not talking about Max’s sex life. I don’t even want to think about Max’s sex life.

  Mom purses her lips at me but I just smile and sit down at the bar. “Pierce, Rachel, Seth, Channing, Paisley, Ashley and Damien. I’m sure Rachel will c
all Asher and he’ll show up. Hopefully he’ll bring BeeBee and the baby. I haven’t seen him in a few weeks.”

  With Ash and Damien coming I should probably run upstairs and change. They might bring someone with them, like they usually do. Oh what am I saying? I know he’ll be here. He wouldn’t miss a night to show up at my house and drive me crazy all night because he’s a douche like that.

  We’ll get to him later.

  I leave my bedroom door open while I’m in the bathroom. That’s how I hear them when I come out of the bathroom. I race to my bedroom door and see them in Max’s room. Dancing around like a couple of idiots. I can’t help but smile though, considering my brother looks so happy.

  They make the oddest couple though. Max is a preppy jock asshole. Maggie is the depressing emo artist. They have nothing in common but sexual chemistry. And I’ve known that since Maggie grew boobs and Max noticed. “You ready to finally admit you’re screwing each other?” I call out across the hallway.

  They both stop and look up at me. Maggie narrows her eyes at me but I just tilt my head and sneer. It’s what I usually do. She leaves my brother’s arms and crosses to the doorway. “How did you know?”

  I raise both of my eyebrows and look like I’m surprised by the question. “How did I know the two of you were deeply in love? Because I have eyeballs. Anyone can see that you know each other’s bodies. It’s actually quite disgusting.” I smirk at my brother and then slam my door shut.

  That’s something it’ll take me a while to get over. He left me out of that part of his life. He includes me in everything else, but when it comes to Maggie, he keeps it all bottled up inside. It’s why I resent Maggie so much. Hell, at this point if he had opened up about it, I could have told him ages ago that he was in love with her. And that I’m happy for him. You see in the end, I don’t care who he dates, just as long as she loves him and is a good person.

  Maggie I’ve known all my life. I know she’s a good person and I know she loves my brother. So I’m fucking happy for him. I’ll have to be friends with Maggie now. I can pull that off too because we were friends when we were little kids.