Here Lies Gloria Mundy mb-61

by Gladys Mitchell

  There was nothing in the face, either, of any pretensions to beauty. She was snub-nosed and her eyes were set close together. She had a low forehead and the most striking thing about her was her hair. It fell only to her shoulders, but was of two unimaginably contrasting colours, violently red on the right side of her head, almost coal-black on the other. In one apparently nerveless hand she held a rose between her thumb and first finger. The other hand fell lifelessly down to reach her thigh.

  ‘Well?’ said Coberley, watching me.

  ‘She is a witch,’ I said, ‘and the artist was a genius.’

  We strolled back to Wotton’s house. I had forgotten my plan to take out my car. I wondered when the portrait had been painted, and whether Celia had ever seen it.

  Aunt Eglantine did not appear at breakfast, but everyone else except Celia was there. Dame Beatrice, who took nothing but toast and coffee, sat next to me and proved to have read my biography of Horace Walpole.

  ‘He was a visitor to a property a few miles from here,’ she said, ‘and recommended it to a friend of his, William Cole. Have you been to Prinknash Abbey?’

  ‘No. My book concerned itself mostly with his writings after he retired to Strawberry Hill.’

  ‘You would enjoy Prinknash. The Benedictines have it now, and have built a new and much enlarged abbey. The old building is used as a retreat house, so you can probably get permission to be shown over it, if you are interested. It is a lovely Early Tudor building and the west court is particularly fine. On the outer wall of the east court there is a bas-relief of a young man reputed to be Henry the Eighth.’

  ‘I shouldn’t think that would find much favour with the monks,’ I said lightly.

  ‘Oh, the thing would have been sculptured long before the Dissolution. There are connections with Catherine of Aragon. Her badge of a pomegranate surmounted by a crown is to be seen here and there, and on the ceiling of the old chapel, which dates back to the later Middle Ages and has a misericord to every stall, there is the badge of Edward the Fourth, a rose and a falcon.’

  At this point a servant came in to say that I was wanted on the telephone. As the only person to whom I had given my address in case there should be any queries about the brochures was McMaster, I guessed correctly that the call must come from him. I took it and went sadly back to the dining-room to tell Wotton that I had to leave forthwith.

  ‘I promised to place myself at McMaster’s disposal,’ I said apologetically, ‘so I’m afraid I shall have to go and see him.’

  ‘Oh, but why? Couldn’t you suggest meeting him here? I would like to see the old buster again. We used to play in the college fifteen, if you remember. Do ask him to come. Is he married?’

  ‘Yes, to somebody called Kate,’ I replied.

  ‘Well, tell him to bring the girl along. We have plenty of room now that Dame Beatrice has to leave us.’

  I had discovered that Celia had repented of putting the earnest young Underedge on a camp bed in one of the attics. (In fact, I doubted whether that had ever been her serious intention.) ‘Roland and Kay are leaving after lunch, too.’ Anthony added.

  Except for Wotton himself, the dining-room was empty when I came back from the telephone for the second time.

  ‘Grateful thanks from McMaster,’ I said. ‘Kate’s decided not to come. He hates leaving her, but won’t be here long. He thinks he and I can be through in about an hour.’

  ‘Oh, good. It would have been a great pity to lose you so soon after your arrival,’ said Anthony.

  ‘Thanks very much.’

  ‘You’ve made a big hit with Celia. She has never met a real live author before. I noticed you seemed to be getting on extremely well with Dame Beatrice, too. A pity you had to say goodbye to her so soon.’

  ‘She was telling me I ought to visit Prinknash Abbey.’

  ‘Oh, yes, you must do that. Apart from a lovely old house which used to be the monastery before they needed more room, the setting is quite supremely beautiful. The place lies in a valley surrounded by wooded hills. You can’t imagine a more delightful spot. I’m glad Dame Beatrice mentioned it.’

  ‘Does one ask any sort of permission to go and see the place?’

  ‘Oh, no. The grounds are open to the public. I don’t know whether you could be shown over the house, but at least you could look at the outside of it. It really is a picture.’

  ‘Talking of pictures,’ I said, ‘Coberley showed me the one in your other house.’

  ‘That’s the lady my great-grandfather kept there,’ he said. ‘She was reputed to have been a witch. I don’t have the picture in this house because it’s supposed to be unlucky. I’d get rid of it if it weren’t such a marvellous bit of painting.’

  ‘Strangely enough, McMaster described it to me,’ I said.

  ‘McMaster? He couldn’t have done. He’s never seen it. Of course, though! You mean he described Gloria Mundy to you.’

  I could feel that there was tension in the air, so, to relieve it, this time it was I who changed the subject. I asked a question which it would have been impossible to put in the presence of the old lady herself.

  ‘You told me how you came to be acquainted with Dame Beatrice, but what was she doing here? I shouldn’t have thought psychiatry was much in your line. Was she here on the same terms as the rest of us, merely as a guest?’

  ‘It was Celia’s idea. She thinks — and with some justification — that poor old Aunt Eglantine is going off her rocker, so Dame Beatrice came to take a look at her and to advise us whether treatment is necessary.’

  ‘How is Aunt Eglantine going to respond, if Dame Beatrice does think it’s necessary?’

  ‘I don’t know what the outcome will be. Dame Beatrice will send us a report.’

  McMaster was to join us after lunch, so, accepting Wotton’s offer to put a writing-desk in my room, I watched the four young people go off for a Sunday morning drive in Roland Thornbury’s car and then went upstairs to go through my notes for McMaster’s brochures so that I should be prepared for his arrival.

  The desk Wotton had given me faced the window, so that every time Ï looked up I had a view of the lawn, the trees and the hills. There was not a great deal to go through in my notes, and at about eleven a servant came in with coffee, a flask of whisky and some biscuits. I had disposed of the coffee and biscuits, and was relaxing and wondering what queries McMaster might have to put to me concerning the brochures, when I saw a girl approaching the house. She was dressed in jeans and a sweater and was carrying a small suitcase. She was a stranger to me until I realised that I had seen, not herself, but a portrait of her. Allowing for the fact that she was clad, whereas the picture I had seen was that of a nude, she bore an uncanny resemblance to the picture of the girl in the old house. What clinched it was her hair. As she approached my window she had pulled off the woollen cap she was wearing and her hair, which had been tucked up under it, fell to her shoulders. Half of it was a fiery red, the rest of it was black.

  She passed in front of my window, but very shortly she was back again. I was standing up by this time and she must have seen me, for she called out, ‘Hi, there! Come and let me in.’

  The window was open at the top. I pushed it up from the bottom and leant out.

  ‘Ring the bell,’ I advised her. ‘I can’t let you in. I’m a visitor here.’

  ‘This is Tony’s pad, isn’t it?’

  ‘It belongs to Mr Wotton.’

  ‘Well, that’s Tony. I’m his cousin Gloria.’

  ‘The front door is round the corner. You must have passed it just now,’ I told her. She made a very rude gesture, walked on, and I heard the doorbell ring.

  The four young ones had returned from their drive. Aunt Eglantine, who had taken affectionate leave of Dame Beatrice, was looking smug. Dame Beatrice, with the expression of a satisfied snake, had been escorted to her car, Celia, at the foot of the table, was looking pensive, Anthony, at its head, appeared gloomy and the newcomer, seated opposite Aunt Eglant
ine, was glancing brightly round at the company.

  Anthony had introduced her to us as Miss Gloria Mundy, but made no mention of relationship. When it was my turn to greet her I had said that coincidence was a very strange thing.

  ‘Another friend of mine knows you,’ I said, ‘a man named McMaster. He mentioned you only a few weeks ago.’

  ‘Oh, dear old Hardie,’ she said. ‘We had great times together. He was tremendous fun.’

  ‘He’s coming here after lunch,’ said Celia. ‘You’ll be able to talk over old times, as perhaps you had hoped to do with Anthony.’

  ‘He is coming on business,’ said Anthony. ‘The person he will want to talk to is Corin.’

  ‘He will want to talk to me,’ said Gloria. She continued to look brightly but, I thought, challengingly around her at the others seated at table. Soup had been served, and she sat there opposite Aunt Eglantine, her soup spoon poised. She waved it. ‘What a bevy of beauties you have assembled, Tony darling,’ she said, looking straight at Marigold Coberley, ‘I wonder how you dare collect young, pretty girls around you now you are a married man. It was different in the old days, wasn’t it? My word! You stepped high and handsome then, you sporty boy, didn’t you? Don’t tell me the old Adam is coming out again. ’

  It was Aunt Eglantine who made what I thought was the adequate response to this. She picked up a flat, soft bread-roll and lobbed it neatly and accurately into Gloria’s well-filled plate of soup.

  ‘Well, her ancient skills have not deserted her,’ said Celia, referring to the incident. ‘Appalling though it was of Aunt, and providing as it did visible proof that we had good reason for having Dame Beatrice take a look at her, it nearly killed me not to laugh.’

  ‘Dame Beatrice would have remained unmoved,’ I said.

  ‘I expect she is accustomed to eccentric patients. I thought Cranford Coberley looked distressed. I expect he was glad none of his boys was present to have such a bad example set them.’ Celia seemed to hesitate for a moment and then, presumably because there was no one in the room except ourselves — for McMaster had arrived and Anthony was showing him over the estate before Hardie and I settled down with the brochures — out she came with it.

  ‘Corin! That awful girl! Whatever could Anthony have seen in her? And why on earth should she come here? He finished with her years ago.’

  ‘Oh, I expect she found herself in the neighbourhood and thought she would look the two of you up.’

  Celia was not pleased. She asked angrily, ‘Oh, why do men always try to cover up for one another?’

  ‘To oppose the monstrous regiment of women. Besides, aren’t women — don’t women — do the same?’ I asked.

  ‘Sometimes, I suppose, sometimes not. Well, I’m not always grateful to Aunt Eglantine, but I’m thankful to her for finding a way of getting rid of Gloria Mundy.’

  ‘Yes, the soup did splash about a bit, didn’t it? I wonder why there is always three times as much liquid when it’s spilt than when it is in the bowl.’

  ‘One of Parkinson’s Laws, isn’t it? I’ll tell you one thing, Corin. That girl is up to mischief of some sort.’

  ‘What sort?’

  ‘If I knew that, I’d know what to do about it. I wish Marigold Coberley hadn’t laughed when the soup went all over Gloria. Did you see the look she got while we were all mopping Gloria up?’

  ‘I wonder why that staggeringly beautiful young woman married a stick-in-the-mud like Coberley?’

  ‘Thereby hangs a tale, but it’s not my story. You must ask Anthony.’

  Anthony, coming into the room, said firmly, ‘As I tried to tell you, he’s a ravening lion where she’s concerned. He risked a lot to marry her, you know. She stood trial for killing her former husband and only got off by the skin of her teeth. Surely you remember the case, Corin? Her name then was Maria Pinzón Campville. Coberley was called as a prosecution witness (most unwillingly, of course) and he married her as soon as the case was over. He threw up a lucrative job and bought the school just to get her away from all the publicity. He told me the story last Christmas when I’d got him nicely sozzled, but it’s old hat now.’

  ‘And did she do it?’ I asked. ‘Kill her husband, I mean?’

  ‘Quíen sabe? There were nine men on the jury, and you know how beautiful she is.’

  ‘At least one of the three women must have voted for an acquittal, though,’ I said, ‘and probably carried the other two with her. There are always women who think a man deserves everything he gets, so perhaps these ladies of the jury approved of the murder. The war between the sexes waxes fiercely in these days of women’s emancipation and the competition for top jobs, I suppose.’

  ‘I’ve got a bone to pick with you,’ said Hara-kiri after we had gone through my notes and alterations.

  ‘With me? But you said you liked what I’d done with the brochures.’

  ‘I’m not talking about the brochures. Do you remember my mentioning Gloria Mundy when we last met?’

  ‘Yes, of course I remember.’

  ‘And I gave you an impression of what I thought of her?’

  ‘Unfavourable, on the whole, as I remember it.’

  ‘Well, I think you might have told me she was staying in the house when you relayed old Anthony’s invitation.’

  ‘But she isn’t staying here. She breezed in all unexpectedly and had to be asked to stay for lunch. You were probably on your way here by the time she turned up, so I couldn’t have let you know, even if I had thought of it. Anyway, there is no question of her staying here. She didn’t even stay long enough to finish her lunch. One of the other guests splashed soup all over her, so she upped and went.’

  ‘I spotted her in the kitchen garden after I had left my car.’

  ‘Well, she won’t be coming back, that’s for sure.’

  ‘You never know. I hope you’re right, that’s all. How long are you staying here?’

  ‘Only until Thursday. Don’t worry. I shall be on to the rest of the brochures in just a day or so.’

  ‘That is not what I meant. How did Wotton react when Gloria showed up?’

  ‘I wasn’t present at their meeting. I was up here.’

  ‘I wonder what she was after?’

  ‘Wanted a free lunch, perhaps,’ I said. ‘I don’t think she looks any more robust than when you knew her. Did you see her again while you were in the grounds with Wotton?’

  ‘No. She can’t have been up to any good coming here, Corin. Was there a hint of Auld Lang Syne, would you say?’

  ‘Honestly, Hardie, I have no idea.’

  ‘Up to no good at all,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘As for me, I’m going to sprinkle salt all round my bed tonight.’

  ‘Don’t tell me you’re as superstitious as that!’ I said.

  He scowled at me, ‘That damn girl spells trouble. You mark my words,’ he muttered angrily. ‘I cut and ran as soon as I spotted that red and black hair above the bushes. I only saw the top of her head, but nobody can mistake her.’

  5

  Chapter of Accidents

  « ^ »

  I had no idea what time it was when Roland and Kay left the house. McMaster and I were still upstairs, working on the brochures. The front door was round a corner and so out of sight of my window, but, in any case, I had no time to look out of it. McMaster had wanted one or two additions to the brochures and there was enough to do to keep us busy until almost teatime.

  It had been getting darker all the afternoon, so, by the time we went downstairs, I had had the electric light on for the past hour. The full force of the storm struck the house just as we reached the hall.

  We heard afterwards that it was the worst storm for ten years. The sky blackened, the windows rattled, doors thought to be shut flew open, the wind shrieked and tore at the trees and bushes, and then the rain came down and deluged the paths and the lawn.

  I have never experienced such rain. It blotted out everything as though the house were surrounded by thick fog. The o
thers all fled to their rooms to make certain that the windows were closed, while Anthony, Celia and the servants made the rest of the rounds. A skylight which had been left open was allowing a spate of water to cascade down the back stairs and for more than five minutes it resisted all attempts to close it.

  The cook reported that water was coming in under the back door and part of the guttering gave up the struggle, so that water fell in fountains down one of the outside walls.

  ‘You shouldn’t have let that witch-girl in,’ pronounced Aunt Eglantine, during the first lull in the storm before its devils’ chorus broke out again. ‘She’s doing all this.’

  ‘You shouldn’t have chucked your bread into her soup,’ said William Underedge severely. ‘I’m afraid you are a very naughty old lady.“

  ‘Karen laughed when I did it.’

  ‘No, I didn’t,’ said Karen. ‘I wouldn’t have thought of laughing. I detest hearty humour. It was Mrs Coberley who laughed.’

  ‘People laugh from shock mostly,’ said McMaster. ‘Isn’t that so?’

  Before anybody could answer, the doorbell pealed and pealed.

  ‘That’s witchcraft, too,’ said Aunt Eglantine. ‘They always do that when they want to annoy people.’

  A maidservant, her cap askew and her shoes soaking wet, announced the return of Kay and Roland. They had decided to take to the byroads, had come to a watersplash which the rain had swollen into a torrent and got their car waterlogged in mid-stream. To complete the disaster, the wind had flung a big branch at them and it had smashed the windscreen.

  ‘We had to abandon the car and get to a garage,’ said Roland. ‘They won’t touch the job until the water ebbs away, so we hired from them and they brought us back. We’re soaking.’

  As this hardly needed saying, Celia sent them off to get a hot bath and she and Anthony lent them clothes, as all their luggage had been left in the boot of their car.

  ‘I’m very grateful for your offer of a bed for the night,’ said McMaster, when the two drowned rats had gone upstairs, ‘but I think I ought to be off as soon as the storm gives over.’