Redeemed: Book Two of the Love Seekers Series
Page 25
My monitor went crazy again, but I denied it. “No. Sometimes that thing goes crazy.”
He straightened up to better watch the monitor that hung over my head. “I love you.”
My pulse quickened.
“Sweetheart.”
My heartrate jumped.
“I love you, Sweetheart.”
My stomach flipped and his smile grew at what he saw on the screen.
And then he leaned over me again and gently pressed his lips to mine. Neither of us could see what the monitor said, but an alarm sounded and we broke apart. In comparison to some of our kisses—that I could remember—this one remained chaste, but at the same time, it held such promise.
“How do I turn it off?” Chad asked as he began pressing different buttons and the screen itself.
“I don’t know? Is there one that says mute?” I suggested. When he had come in, I intended to shut him out and down, but for the first time since waking up, I felt lighter. However, a cloud still hung over my head. “Chad?”
“I’m trying, but the damn thing won’t shut up.”
“Do—” I got one word out before a nurse came running in. I thought his name was Jeff or something, but I couldn’t remember. Since waking up, I didn’t want to care about anything. In my eyes, my life had been over. And now I thought that maybe I had been wrong. My eyes wandered to Chad standing next to me, and when he caught me staring, he winked. My heart fluttered again.
“I see you have some color. I guess your boyfriend has some magic in him or something,” the nurse cackled.
Rolling my eyes a little, too much still caused a lot of pain, I tried to correct him, and stopped. The mere idea of Chad being my boyfriend made me happy.
“Thanks, Jeff,” Chad said once the alarm quit shouting at us.
“No problem. Next time it happens, just hit this button.”
“I thought I had,” Chad grumbled.
I laughed. I still hurt, and this caused me a small amount of pain, but I laughed, and it felt good to laugh. It felt good to feel something other than dismay and depression. Did I still feel sorry for myself? Yes. I didn’t know how this was going to work, and the thought of being like this for the rest of my life unnerved me. I wasn’t sure I could do it. I knew I couldn’t alone, but suddenly, I looked to my right and found someone smiling back at me. I wasn’t alone. Still broken, no matter what Chad claimed, just not alone any longer.
“Whatever you gave her, pass some my way. I have a few other patients that could use it,” Jeff stated, his own lips curled into a grin. “Do you two need anything?”
“No, we’re okay on our own,” Chad answered for the both of us.
“Okay. If you need me, use the call button.” As quickly as he entered, he left.
Grabbing one of the two chairs from against the wall under the window, Chad sat it next to the bed and then fell into it. He put his hand palm up on the bed next to me. He was giving me a choice. To take everything he had to offer, or to fall back into my shell.
I lifted my hand, and even though it shook, I laid in on top of his.
He brought it to his lips and kissed the palm of it, sending another thrill through me. His grin made me believe he did that on purpose to see what the monitors would do. “We’re in this together, Rayne. I’m not going to let you go through this alone. I’ll be here every step of the way.”
My question from before we were interrupted still loomed in front of me. I couldn’t hold his gaze and instead looked at our joined hands. “Do you think I’ll really be able to walk again?”
“I do. You’ve already had some feeling return on your right side.”
Frowning, I shifted my gaze to him, my bewildered expression asking my unspoken question for me.
“Have you not been listening to the doctors?”
My frown intensified.
“Man when you decide to shut down and stick your head up your ass—”
“Chad,” I chastised softly. My throat felt raw. I hadn’t talked this much in weeks.
Sighing, he told me, “When they’ve done the exams on you, your right foot twitches. You say you feel something. Yesterday, your left foot twitched. It’s never done that before. So, yes, I think you will walk again someday.” His face fell. “But I can’t tell you how long or when.”
I sat there in shock. I had been so wrapped up in my own self-hate and depression that I never listened to anything the doctors said.
“Rayne, we’re going to figure this out together. I’ve already talked to Emma—”
“Why?” I demanded, partly out of habit and partly out of curiosity. My abruptness had become a knee jerk reaction.
“Because she’s the resident expert in our group about how to set up a house for handicap use. Plus she wanted to help,” he said calmly. His head tilted to the side, and he told me, “She’s not all bad. She really does want to be friends. Plus, she understands more than anyone how difficult it is to have your life to be turned upside down overnight.”
“How would she know?”
“You really don’t know? We’ve told you.”
“I ignored you and her,” I snapped.
He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head with disbelief. “Emma was celebrating her birthday one weekend and had no problems. Then the next week, she ended up in the ER unable to breathe and they couldn’t figure out why. That’s when her myasthenia gravis showed up. She went from celebrating to struggling to do normal tasks. It hit her all at once.”
“I…I didn’t know.”
“Yeah. So she knows how to make everything ready and I asked her to do what she needed to my house.”
“You’re assuming I’m coming to live with you. I could go to one of my parent’s houses or…Bryan’s apartment.”
“I hope you mean Bryan’s apartment because you are willing to try with Emma, but you’re parents’ apartments both have walkups. Your brother’s has the space, but are you ready to be around Emma 24/7?”
He had a point. Damn him.
“And don’t suggest you can stay by yourself. I’ll put my fucking foot down on that one.”
In truth, the thought never crossed my mind, because I knew I would need help. “All right, but on one condition.”
“Name it.”
“Don’t leave me,” I whispered my plea. Fear still gripped me and held me in the palm of its hand, making me afraid of this journey, of the future, and of everything else.
“Never.”
“That means you’re stuck with only me from now on. No going around and—”
He pressed a finger from his free hand to my lips. “Rayne, I love you and I don’t want anyone else. Call me reformed, redeemed, or what the fuck ever. I only want you for the rest of my life.”
“That sounds like a proposal.” I laughed nervously.
“It is if you want it to be.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver looking ring with a round diamond on it, and then he cleared his throat. “I got this in case you ever pulled your head out of your ass. I was so afraid of losing you that this gave me hope that maybe you would snap out of the funk you had fallen into.”
I was sure I appeared gob smacked. “Chad?”
“I thought if I could reach you, then it’s yours. Then again, I was also afraid that I would pull you out, only to lose you. It would have been worth it though. We still have a lot to work through and there is a long, long road ahead of us, but use this as a promise for the future. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay by your side and help you to fight. I don’t want to be anywhere else. And if you want me to go, I will.”
“I don’t want you to go. I…I…love you too.” Tears were flowing once again, but this time they weren’t angry or sad. They were full of love, happiness, and hope. Dark days stood in front of me, but with him by my side, they would seem less black.
Pushing up out of his chair, he leaned over me and his lips claimed mine. I opened my mouth, but instead of intensifying the kiss, he pulled away a
nd slid the ring on my finger. Disappointment washed over me.
After he returned to his seat, he said, “Don’t look like that. I want to, but I also know you’re still healing and anyone can walk in at any time. Tomorrow I’ll take you for a walk outside if it’s okay with the docs and I’ll give you a real kiss.”
He winked, and I smiled.
Through adversity, through the darkness, unexpectedly, Chad had become my light.
Chapter 36
Chad
R ayne was a true fighter. Surprisingly we were left alone the day of our confrontation, and her parents didn’t show their faces again until the next morning. When they did, I had some explaining to do. Both were happy and excited, especially knowing they had their little girl back from the edge of bleakness.
Bryan wasn’t as happy. He accepted my presence without too many questions, but once Rayne turned the corner, he pulled me to the side. That had been one of the most uncomfortable conversations I’d ever had with him. Emma hadn’t told him she was helping me remodel my house for his sister. So the news that his sister and I were involved came as a surprise.
“What are your intentions toward my sister?” he demanded, his face set in a grim expression after we exited the hospital. He had asked me to walk him to his car so we could talk. I should have been on guard.
“I believe that’s rather obvious considering she’s wearing a diamond ring I gave her,” I retorted, and instantly regretted it. I could be the world’s biggest smartass, but I also needed to win him over. He already held a grudge against me for making a pass at Emma before they got together.
Grabbing my shirt, he pulled me close. “Why don’t you explain it to me because last I checked, you hated her,” he seethed. He had every right to believe that, because it was true.
“I don’t know, Bryan.” I decided honesty was the best policy. “I decided someone should give her an attitude adjustment and since no one else was going to do it, I volunteered myself. It backfired somewhere along the way and I fell for her.”
“You wanted to change her mind? My little sister?”
“She needed to learn that Emma was not a leper.”
“My little sister?”
“Yes.” I could tell he was getting madder, but I didn’t gird my loins so to speak.
“Did you sleep with her?”
This time I didn’t answer, and attempted to keep my face blank. Now that I had time to think about what happened the day after our engagement, I should have known I was in trouble.
I didn’t see it coming. One minute I stood there nose to nose, his hand fisted in my shirt, and the next, I doubled over with a punch to my gut. I deserved it. My relationship with Rayne began under less than truthful conditions. When he punched me in the jaw, I decided I deserved that too.
He pulled me close again. “If you do anything dishonest with my sister again, if you hurt her, or make her cry, I know where to hide the body and I have a squadron of friends that will help make sure you are never found. Do you get me?”
Considering Bryan was a Navy fighter pilot, I wholeheartedly believed his threat. “I get it,” I groaned.
“Good. And I would recommend not telling Emma about this either.”
The last thing I wanted to do was to admit to a woman that her husband kicked my ass. I had more self-respect than that. “My lips are sealed.”
He got into his car and drove off, and I fell to the dirty ground, leaning against the wall of the parking garage, trying to catch my breath.
Four weeks had passed since then, and Rayne had been doing all she could to get better. She was my fighter. While in the hospital, she finally opened up to the psychologist, and he really helped her to work through some of her issues with not only her new disability, but with others who were disabled. She still had some work to do, however, she’d made progress, and that was what mattered.
Then after she got transferred to the rehab center about two weeks ago, she continued to work hard. She did her physical therapy and occupational therapy without complaint…That wasn’t completely true. She complained to me. And like I promised, I stayed by her side every step of the way.
And today was the culmination of all of her hard work. Today, she got discharged and would be coming home with me. My body sang with happiness simply thinking about it. No more hospitals, nurses, or doctors. We could get on with our lives. She would still have outpatient physical therapy, and she needed to continue with her counselor to help her work through her emotional issues, but she would be home and we would be together without all of the extra people in our lives all of the time. I couldn’t wait. Me and her alone, no more bad hospital smells. I didn’t care how well they cleaned things, hospitals and rehab centers always smelled—worse than the gym.
Walking into her room with a smile on my face, I found her already sitting in her wheelchair waiting for me. “Hey, Sweetheart. In a rush?”
The nurse standing next to her laughed. “She made me help her into her chair almost an hour ago.”
That was Rayne, ever impatient and wanted things done her way, in her time frame. Which was why she still got more than a little frustrated that she had not made more progress and still had to use the chair. Slowly, some feeling was starting to come back, but not enough according to her. And she still couldn’t stand or move her legs more than a small twitch; however, to me that was progress. To her, her body still wanted to teach her a lesson and had betrayed her. Sometimes, at the end of her therapy sessions, I would help her to bed and hold her in my arms, as she cried on my chest. It killed me that I couldn’t do more for her, even if I did whatever I could.
Her wheelchair was one of those things. Emma always used pink or colorful walkers and canes, saying if she had to use them, may as well have fun with them. Rayne deserved something fun too. I found her a neon green wheelchair. She could have had any color in the world, and she wanted neon green. I swore that thing glowed in the dark.
I bent down and gave Rayne a small kiss. “Don’t be so impatient. Haven’t you ever heard that good things come to those who wait?”
“I think I’ve heard that a time or two, but I’m ready to blow this joint. No offense, Bea,” she informed me.
Bea, the nurse, giggled. “No offense taken. If I were in your shoes, I’d be ready to get out of here too.”
“Do I need to do anything?” I asked.
“The doctor just left about ten minutes ago. Here’s all the discharge paperwork.” Bea handed me a small stack of papers. “It’s all signed by him and Rayne. The top page has her next physical therapy appointment. Occupational therapy discharged her this morning. And that’s it. You are free to go.” She gave Rayne a hug from behind before she pulled me in for one too. Some of the people I would miss, but not the scenery.
“Ready to go, Rayne?” In answer to my question, she started to wheel herself out of the room, her laugh following in her wake.
It felt so damn good to hear her laughing again, to see her smiling. After she woke up, I honestly didn’t know if I would ever bear witness to it again. She had her good moments and her bad, but thankfully, she never again sank as low as she once had. I counted that as a blessing.
Catching up to her, I grabbed the handles on the back of her chair and started to push her. She didn’t always like it when I took control of her driving, however, this time she allowed it without arguing. “It’s a miracle.”
“What is?” she asked. I could tell by the tone of her voice that she thought I had lost my mind. Maybe I had, because why else would I have fallen in love with her, the one person I considered my enemy. I guess the old saying about love and hate was accurate.
“That you let me drive without complaining at all.”
“It happens occasionally.”
“Rarely,” I teased her, leaning down as I pushed her to kiss the top of her head. Bending closer to her ear, I whispered, “I love you.”
I imagined her face turning beet red as she muttered, “I love you too.”
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Before Rayne, I believed that I would be alone for the rest of my life. I could get women and I got a lot of them, but I wanted that one person I could connect with. I hoped I would find her, and yet, I never truly believed I would. I was wrong. Rayne was my redemption.
****
Rayne
Chad saved me. He pulled me back from the darkness and rescued me. Without him, I knew I wouldn’t have made it as far as I had.
“Hey, Rayne?”
The sound of his voice had the power to make me giddy inside. “Yeah?” We were driving toward his house, and I was anxious to get there. Seven weeks in the hospital had started to make me feel a little batty.
“Your parents, Bryan, and Emma are waiting for us at the house.” Though his words were strong, his voice betrayed his uncertainty.
Emma. I had blamed her for so much, accused her of heinous crimes, and sentenced her for things she had no control of. I knew that now. It took me a long time to come to terms with that, but I did. Unfortunately, this will be my first real visit with her since the accident. I heard that she came by a few times before I woke up, and even the week after I had—though I didn’t remember it—and wound up getting pneumonia. After that, everyone decided it was best if she stayed away from the hospital. She was a better woman than I. Even after I treated her horrendously, she helped Chad make improvements to the house, and somehow she didn’t completely dislike me. I would have. Like I said, a better woman than I.
“You okay?” Chad asked when I hadn’t responded.
“Yeah, I’m good. It’ll be good to have everyone together.” I had been peering out the window, watching the scenery fly by, and turned to give him a genuine smile. His expression did not hide his fear. He was afraid I would do something to Emma, or that we wouldn’t get along. She had become one of his closest friends, and I was his fiancée. Not that I would make him, but I did wonder, if he had to choose, which one would he pick?
“You, every time, Sweetheart.” He gave me a forced half smile, and then he laughed. “You mumbled under your breath again. I think it’s becoming a bad habit of yours.”