The Nine Fold Heaven

by Mingmei Yip

  Then he pushed Gao’s head down till it touched the ground—an extreme insult and humiliation.

  A few young women, who may have fallen in love with him on the spot, dabbed their eyes with handkerchiefs, one even sobbed. But crying can’t help, only action does. And from my experience as a spy, I’d learned that with action, one must watch the timing, especially when you plan to kill somebody.

  I was well aware that Buddhism teaches wisdom and compassion. However, this did not apply to me, for, if I were compassionate, I’d have died a horrible death a long time ago. Kindness only works when it encounters another kindness. But when kindness meets cruelty, it’s the path to defeat. That’s why the Chinese say, “Use poison to get rid of poison.”

  Cautiously my hand reached into my pocket to feel the hard handle of my knife. Knife-throwing was part of my training to be an assassin for Big Brother Wang. Though I threw knives with great accuracy as part of my stage act, I’d never had the occasion to use them in a fight. I thought of how it had been Gao’s job to search me thoroughly before I’d be let inside his boss’s room. I couldn’t say I minded this. Gao had always been good to me—tender and protective. But I couldn’t love him completely, because there was Jinying, our boss’s son, and the father of my child.

  I knew well that executing Gao as a spy was a way for Chief Li to do a favor for Big Brother Wang. Since Lung, dead or disappeared, was now out of the way, Big Brother Wang had finally attained his goal of being the number one gangster in Shanghai. So Li was now eager to collaborate with the new number one.

  Li’s thunderous voice woke me from my reflections. “What are we waiting for? Chop this criminal’s head off, right now!”

  To everyone’s surprise, Gao raised his head and shouted, “Wait!”

  Li sneered. “All right, let’s hear what’s the last wish of a dying man. If it’s not unreasonable, I might as well grant it to accumulate some good karma for myself. Don’t you think?”

  A collective “Yes!” burst among the onlookers.

  Again, to everyone’s surprise, Gao’s question was, “Is my outfit buttoned in the correct way?”

  The onlookers burst into hilarious laughter, as if they were watching a comedy, not a killing.

  Someone yelled, “Ha! You’re going to report to the King of Hell in seconds, you think he‘ll care about your outfit, huh? Or are you a member of the Severed Sleeve Club?”

  More raucous laughter exploded.

  Severed Sleeve refers to men who love other men. One time when Emperor Ai of the Han dynasty woke up next to his favorite male concubine, he found the latter asleep with his head on the emperor’s dragon sleeve. Having no heart to wake up his lover, the emperor cut off his sleeve.

  Chief Li looked amused. Since Gao was the fish trapped inside his urn, he could take his own sweet time before letting the ax fall.

  He asked sarcastically, “All right, just out of curiosity, why do you want to know if your buttons are in the right holes?”

  Gao spat. “I’d like to look respectable on my last, solitary journey to meet with the King of Hell.” He paused, then spat out vehemently. “And you bet you’ll ask the same question when I’m back!”

  That was an ominous remark, implying that he’d come back to Chief Li as a vengeful ghost!

  As if heaven also heard what Gao had just said, all of a sudden there was a clap of thunder followed by a sudden downpour. Some ran to take refuge under the few nearby trees; others pulled up their jacket to cover their heads.

  The young man next to me said to his friends, “I think heaven disapproves of the execution. We should go, I don’t want to be part of this. Leave before heaven looks in our direction and recognizes our faces, quick!”

  A guard immediately held a huge umbrella over Police Chief Li. Then the boss made a chopping gesture with his gloved hand. Was the glove to keep the blood from staining his murderous hand?

  Then he addressed the crowd, “Please stay calm, it’ll be over in a moment; then you can all go home to relax or to a restaurant to have a big meal!”

  As the man in the black mask raised the ax high to strike, I slid the knife from my pocket and hurled it with full force. As expected, the knife buried itself in the executioner’s thick arm.

  Blood squirted in his eyes and ran down the mask to his chest as he screamed out painfully. “Aiya!”

  The ax dropped to the floor as more rain poured down.

  Someone yelled, “Let the man go free!

  “Don’t you realize that heaven does not want him to die?!”

  Chief Li raised his voice against the thunder and the calls of the crowd. “This man is a heartless criminal and will meet his long-deserved death!”

  But no one listened to him, because they believed he had been overruled by heaven.

  Li shouted, veins bulging on his temples. “I’m the police chief and I order you all to stay, right now!”

  But there was mass confusion. Ignoring the disorderly crowd, he turned to ordered the executioner. “Strike, now!”

  But Gao was nowhere to be seen.

  As unobtrusively as possible, I squeezed through the stampeding crowd and left this place of horror. I’d left behind my precious knife but saved an even more precious life.

  9

  Forbidden Love

  That night I slept restlessly, terrible images flitting through my distorted awareness. Finally, I fell into a deep, troubled sleep and did not awaken in my hotel room until it was already afternoon, the sheets clammy with my sweat. I soaked for a long time in the bathtub, then rested until evening, when I finally summoned the energy to go out. Not wanting to be alone, I decided to visit Edward Miller, hoping he could soothe my chilled and exhausted mind and body. I hoped the ambassador would be at home, but I knew that diplomats like him spend many evenings out at dinners or receptions with politicians, businessmen, or celebrities.

  As usual, I asked the driver to let me off some distance from Miller’s house. Then I walked through the nearby wooded area to the gate of his compound. The guards would look me over and question me before informing their boss that I had arrived and allowing me to enter.

  Under the moonlight, in the midst of the thicket of trees, from the corner of my eye I spotted a figure a few yards from me. He seemed to be hesitating, uncertain if he should continue. My spy’s mind immediately wondered if I should run to the guards and alert them to a possible intruder. But there was too much distance between me and the guards. So I put my hand on my knife, the one I still had, just in case.

  “Who are you?” I called out.

  The ghostly figure approached me, branches cracking under his feet. Then in the moonlight, to my utter shock, I saw Gao, the man I had just rescued from hell!

  His expression was equally shocked when he realized who I was.

  “Camilla?!”

  “Shhh… Gao, keep your voice down.”

  He seemed to make a tremendous effort to do so. “Camilla… can it really be you?”

  I said in a heated whisper, “Yes, it’s me, Gao. And I’m so glad that you are alive!”

  A great pain rose in my heart when I saw Gao was still in his torn, blood-stained “execution” outfit. His once bright eyes were now covered with red threads and his cheeks were so sunken that I believed they could hold water.

  “What are you doing here?” we each asked simultaneously.

  I signaled for him to go first.

  But instead of answering me and before I could think, he pulled me to his broad chest and kissed me hard on my lips. I was not prepared for the intensity of my feelings. But, of course, ours was an after-near-death reunion!

  When we finally released each other, he paused to study my face as if he were a museum curator appreciating the unexpected return of stolen artwork.

  “I never thought I’d have a chance to see you again in this life, Camilla. Did you reach Hong Kong after I took you to the ship? Why have you come back? It is very dangerous for you here. Tell me everything.”
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  I didn’t answer him right away but pulled him back so that we were hidden behind a big tree. I ran my fingers down his scared, bony face with all the tenderness I could gather.

  ”Gao, it’s been… I had to come back from Hong Kong.” I didn’t want to mention Jinjin—or Jinying. “Later, I’ll tell you later.”

  “But, Camilla… tell me now. Who knows if we’ll ever see each other again?”

  I remained silent. If we were not going to see each other, what did it matter?

  Knowing that he wouldn’t get any information from me, he stroked my cheek and changed the subject. “Camilla, it had to be you who threw the knife and saved my life!”

  “How do you know?”

  “Camilla, who else? In Shanghai, you’re the famous knife thrower.”

  Damn. “Gao, then do you think Police Chief Li will also figure out it was me?”

  “Most probably.”

  “But would he expect that I had come back to Shanghai to offer myself at the tiger’s mouth?”

  “He probably doesn’t care. He just wants to catch you.”

  “Then should I run for my life?’

  “Yes—run with me.”

  I was moved by his invitation to escape. At the moment it would have been easy for me just to run away with him. But what about the rest of my life? Though I did feel love for this rough man whom I had just saved from the ax, I knew I could not stay with him. I had to find Jinying and our baby, Jinjin.

  Unsure what to say, this time I changed the subject. “Why did you come here?”

  “Camilla, I really have no place to go. Haven’t you heard that the Americans are more humane and more willing to help? That’s why I’m here.”

  “But with what excuse? The consul people must already know that you’re the ‘traitor’ to be executed.”

  “Exactly, then they should also know that the government never gave me a fair trial, just ordered that I be executed.” His voice was losing its qi under the dim light of the crescent moon bathing us through the foliage.

  My once-muscular bodyguard-lover now looked gaunt and weak as a withered tree. He must have suffered tremendously. Horrible images of beating, flesh slicing, finger crushing, toe hammering… forced themselves into my mind. However, despite his longer, matted hair, his eyes were sharp and bright like torches. He was no less handsome, just different.

  I took his hands. As I expected, they were all scarred. “Gao, did they…”

  He nodded. “But no more talk about this, Camilla.”

  After a few moments of silence, I blurted out, “Where did you hide? Were you with Lung? How did they find you?”

  “After I got you on the ship, I went to an unlicensed doctor who used to treat Master Lung’s men. He took out the bullet and sewed me up. He has reason to avoid the police, too, so he hid me while I recovered.”

  “He was really kind.“

  He chuckled. “Ha! Not that simple, Camilla. It’s because he got so many favors and was paid so much by Master Lung that he can’t afford to refuse me, in case Lung is still alive somewhere. If Lung makes his comeback someday, a lot of heads will no longer be on their shoulders.”

  “Then how did Chief Li find you?”

  “One day when the doctor was away, a group of policemen broke into his office and arrested me. I suspected it was a setup. The doctor might have been pressured by the police to sell me out.”

  “It’s horrible. I’m so sorry, Gao.”

  “Don’t worry about me, Camilla. I’ve always managed to get by. Now, what about you? I’m sure they know it was you who rescued me. If anything happens, I’m not sure I can help you anymore. Do you think there’s any chance that the Americans will give us protection? Is that the reason you came here too?”

  I nodded. “Yes, in case something bad happens…” My voice trailed off.

  Suddenly, it was all too complicated, so I just thrust my small torso against his big one and hugged him tightly like an octopus its prey.

  He kissed me with a tenderness one would never expect from a brutal bodyguard.

  “Camilla, you’re the only good thing in my miserable life. And you risked your own life to save mine.”

  “But, Gao…” I moved strands of his hair away so I could take a good look at his gaunt face. “You took a bullet for me, and—”

  He cut me off. “I know you think you’re bad, but I know that’s not your true nature—you’re forced to do things. I am too. But when I am with you, I feel it could be different… for both of us. “

  “How could it be different? We are both fugitives.”

  “Camilla, I just hope for something better. To not have to be on guard all the time. To not worry if you will be alive at the end of each day.”

  “Gao, I owe my life to you….”

  He looked into my eyes. “Then what about… him?”

  “Who?”

  “You know who I mean.”

  Of course he was referring to his boss’s son, who was my other lover, Jinying.

  I made my answer short and vague. “You know where he is?”

  He shook his head. “I’ve been staying out of sight.” Then a desolate expression spread over his sunken face. “Camilla, is there any chance that I’m the father of your baby?”

  “Sorry, Gao, but I don’t think so.”

  “How are you so sure?”

  “Because little Jinjin came to me in my dreams. And he just looks like the young master. I’m so sorry….”

  “So you’re coming back for him and your son? But isn’t he…”

  I knew he didn’t have the heart to say the word dead.

  “Gao, I also came back to be sure you’re all right.”

  “You’re telling the truth?”

  I nodded, taking out my last, most precious and treasured knife. “Gao, please keep this for protection and as my token of love for you.”

  Among the few knives I had, this was special. It was decorated with silver, gold, and precious gems—ruby, crystal, malachite. Lung had given it to me—I suspected, though he never admitted it, that it had come from the body of one of his many victims. Sometimes I thought of the knife as itself like a beautiful skeleton woman, able to destroy men and topple countries. I could not stay with Gao, yet I hoped that my knife would both help him defend himself and remind him of our love.

  The bodyguard’s face lit up as he caressed the knife’s hilt. “Camilla, I will keep this with me every day that I live. Even if I’m destitute, I’ll never pawn or sell it. I will treasure this as I have treasured you.”

  Fascinated by the sharp blade, he suddenly spun and stabbed it into the tree trunk he had been leaning on.

  Then he touched my cheek with his big, rough hand. “You heard the saying that a hero will protect three villages, a dog its three neighbors? As long as I’m still breathing on this earth, I’ll love and protect you as much as I can.”

  I was greatly moved by this sentiment. Not that I thought he could really protect me from all the evil people now out to get me, but because he was so unlike the others who cared for me only if I could be useful in their tortuous schemes. In my world, decency was unexpected. Life, as the Chinese phrase it, is like “a broad landscape with winding bridges and tall mountains”—one never knows what is around the next turn.

  Gao took the knife and put it inside his pocket. He held his hand out to help me up onto a big boulder underneath the tree, then sat beside me. It was getting dark and chilly, so I tightened my thin blouse around my chest. Poor Gao looked upset that he didn’t have anything to offer me to protect myself from the cold. So he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. We remained silent, savoring these moments, wondering if they would be our last ones together.

  The consulate building stood silent and majestic in the distance. Its many lights resembled spying eyes, watching Gao’s and my every move.

  But I ignored the spying and asked, “Gao, I’ve always wondered, how come you’re still alone? I’m sure lots of women have wanted you.
”

  He sighed. “Camilla, you’re the only woman I care about. My wife’s very cold, distant, and proper—”

  “I didn’t know that you’re married!”

  “It was an arranged marriage. I never loved her and she knew that from the beginning. My family tried to get me a second wife, but none of the girls were to my taste. Too young and frightened, as if I might torture them at any moment. I’m married, but I also live like a single man.”

  “Did you… go to the turquoise pavilions?”

  Turquoise pavilions were high-class establishments where the ladies, though available, were well versed in the four literary arts of music, poetry, painting, and calligraphy.

  “I did. But never after I met you. I just lost interest in these women who have lost their hearts.”

  “But, Gao, I, too, am a bad person, very bad.” Although I love two men—not only you, but Jinying—I was also intimate with an ambassador only a few days ago. But I swallowed my self-accusation.

  He pulled me to him and kissed me deeply; then his hand reached to pull up my dress.

  I was mumbling between his mouthful attacks. “Gao, stop, what do think you’re doing? This is not a safe place and we’ve already let our guard down. Someone might come out from the building anytime to take a walk here.”

  But the bodyguard ignored my warning.

  “Camilla,” he went on, unzipping his pants, “we have no idea if we’ll see each other again, nor how long we’ll live….”

  His voice trailed off as I felt his ballooning sex, like a mischievous snake slithering around the hole to which it wanted desperately to return. Soon we were lying on the mud and grass kissing, groping, squeezing, shaking, as in the midst of our living hell we entered our temporary sexual paradise.

  Just after we finished our frantic pleasure, an explosion slashed the night air, followed by the sounds of shattering glass and collapsing walls. My ears rang as they had during the shoot-out in Master Lung’s villa. We quickly pulled on our clothes and looked around to see where the startling bang had come from.