So Much Trouble When She Walked In

by Judy Angelo

  Silken looked across at Suave then slowly, almost creeping, she began to cross the room. When she got to the bed she looked down and that was when she realized that the man’s eyes were wide open and he was staring back at her.

  “G…good afternoon, sir,” she said, feeling her face redden. Had he seen her creeping toward him? She must have looked so stupid. “Thank you for agreeing to see us.”

  “Yes, we really appreciate it.” Suave was beside her now, nodding her head as if to convince the man of their great appreciation.

  Doctor Pintero was old and wrinkled and as shriveled as a prune but his black eyes were sharp as lances as they moved from one face to the other. “Twins,” he said, his voice a hoarse whisper. “Black-haired twins.”

  Silken’s heart jerked. What did he mean? Did he actually remember them? Their birth?

  “Yes,” she whispered, trying to contain her excitement. “Do you remember us? Silken and Suave McCullen. University of Wisconsin Hospital.”

  The doctor drew in a deep breath and closed his eyes. Then he expelled it in a long, slow sigh.

  Silken’s eyes widened as she stared down at the man’s ashen face. Had she shocked him with her outburst, even though it was a whispered one? Had she put him under the stress the housekeeper had warned her about, under penalty of being thrown out the door?

  But then the doctor opened his eyes again and she could see the exhaustion nestled there.

  He must be really sick for a simple statement to tire him out that much.

  “Yes, I remember,” he said finally. “What do you want?”

  “Doctor,” Suave said, stepping closer to the bed. “We want to know our mother. Can you help us?”

  His eyes swung to Suave and a frown settled on his wizened face. “That was not her wish.” His voice was only a whisper but there was no mistaking the firmness in it. “You must not…try to find her.” Then he broke into a hacking cough that shook his body and made Suave grab for the glass of water on his nightstand. Gently, she slid her arm behind his shoulders and raised him up then put the glass to his lips.

  He took two sips then, the coughing over, he sank back into the pillows. “Thank you,” he croaked, even as his chest heaved and he looked like he was gasping for air.

  For a moment both Silken and Suave remained silent, watching him. Then Silken decided to take the chance and speak again. “We have to find our mother,” she said, keeping her tone as emotionless as she could. “We can’t live like this, not knowing who she is. Please understand.”

  “I understand,” he said, and Silken could see in his eyes that he did. “But she said you must never know. It was…her decision.”

  Silken felt like he’d just stabbed her in the heart. You must never know…the stricken look on Suave’s face told Silken that the words had hurt her sister as much as they’d hurt her.

  “But you have to tell us.” Suave looked like she was about to cry. “You must.”

  The man drew in a breath and let it out slowly. On his face was a look of deep regret. “I swore,” he began, then cleared his throat. “I swore I would never let her name be known even if…even if you came looking for me.”

  “Then why did you let us come all this way,” Silken could not keep the bitterness out of her voice, “if you knew you weren’t going to tell?”

  The man shook his head as he lay there on the pillows, looking from one woman to the other, then his gaze focused on Silken. “I wanted you to know, to understand,” he said. “There were circumstances.” He dropped his gaze. Then, as if he suddenly felt cold, he clutched the sheet and pulled it up under his chin. “Your mother…she wished to…put this behind her. Try to…understand.”

  “So you’re not going to tell us?” The room suddenly felt hot and Silken felt like she was stifling.

  “No.” His face resolute, he stared at them for a moment longer and then closed his eyes.

  Well, that was that. He wasn’t going to talk and there was nothing she or Suave could do about it.

  She turned away from the bed and made a step toward the door. “Come on,” she said to Suave. “We’re wasting our time here.”

  “But Silken…” Suave looked from the old man to her then back again.

  “Come on,” Silken said again, her voice more insistent this time. “He’s not going to talk. Didn’t you hear him? Let’s go.”

  She could see the hesitation on Suave’s face but finally, sensibly, she backed away and turned toward the door. Silken put her arm around her sister and they headed back to the door.

  “Wait.”

  They both froze then turned as one to stare at the man in the bed. He lifted a shaking hand to point at them.

  “Make sure,” he said in a whispered shout, if there was such a thing, “that you give Mrs. Detlef your contact information.”

  Silken looked at Suave and Suave looked back at Silken. They both shrugged. What did it matter anymore? He wasn’t talking so his demand didn’t make much sense. Still, just to humor a very sick man, Silken decided to agree.

  “We will,” she said, then with Suave in tow she turned back toward the door and went on her way.

  CHAPTER TEN

  When Max went to see Silken after a silence of almost a month it was a very different woman that he found that day he walked onto the lot of Steady Auto.

  He’d called ahead and got Suave on the office phone so he’d asked her to let Silken know he’d be dropping by. He didn’t ask to speak to her. He didn’t want to risk it. Knowing how contrary Silken could be, she would probably say no.

  He’d expected to find her with her head stuck under the hood of a car but this time she was sitting on a boulder in the shade of a tree, a somber look on her face. He walked over and stopped right in front of her.

  She looked up and gave him a weak smile. “Hi, stranger,” she said, and he could detect no sarcasm, no impudence, no…Silken.

  He shoved his hands into his pockets as he stared down at her. “What’s up?”

  She shrugged. “Oh, nothing.” Then she shifted over and jerked her head toward the free space on the boulder.

  Taking her up on the invitation, he sat down beside her and looked out over the yard, just like she was doing. “I thought you’d be in the garage, working on a car,” he said, his tone casual.

  “Suave told me you were coming over so I decided to take a break.”

  He looked across at her. “I’m honored.”

  She gave a soft laugh. “Don’t feel too honored. I was tired, anyway.”

  Max frowned as he took in her face, the lines between her brows, the slight downturn at the corners of her mouth. “That doesn’t sound like you.”

  “Yeah, well…” She looked away like she didn’t want to continue the conversation.

  “Silken, talk to me. What’s going on inside that head of yours?” When she just shook her head, looking crestfallen but saying nothing, he reached over and grasped her hand. Something was definitely wrong but she wasn’t talking…and he needed to find out.

  “I…it’s nothing.” She shook her head then she bit her lip.

  Now he was beginning to get really concerned…and angry. If something was wrong, why the hell was she acting like a clam? “Don’t give me that ‘it’s nothing’ crap. Tell me what’s wrong or else I’ll talk to Suave,” he fixed his narrowed gaze on her, “and I don’t know if you want that.”

  She frowned and tried to pull her hand away but he refused to let her go. She wasn’t going to get off that easily, not without him finding out what was wrong. She pulled again and when she saw that he had no intention of releasing her she gave a defeated sigh.

  “Are you going to talk?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “Not here, not now.” She looked around the yard, her gaze bleak, and she was like a little girl lost.

  “We’ll talk tonight then. I can come to see you.”

  She shook her hear again. “No, not at my place. I don’t want…Suave to know how upset I am. Somewhe
re else.”

  “Do you want to come over to my house?” He asked the question but he really didn’t want to go there, not after what had happened last time.

  She shrugged. “I guess so.” Then she looked up at him. “Is Reed still there?”

  “No, he’s been back in London two weeks now.” Would that make a difference to her? They’d be all alone at the house. His eyes roamed her face but there was no change there.

  “Okay, I’ll come over. Seven o’clock. I’ll talk to you then.”

  Before he could say another word she got up and this time when she pulled her hand he let it slide from his grasp. Then he watched as she walked slowly back to the office.

  That evening Max prepared a light dinner for two, grilled salmon with wild rice and asparagus. He had no idea how long Silken planned to stay or even if she would accept his offer of dinner. He would just have to be prepared for anything.

  A couple of minutes before the seven o’clock hour his doorbell rang and he went to get it. Silken was there, standing at the entrance like last time, but this time she was alone. And this time she looked quiet and subdued and vulnerable.

  He gave her a smile. “Come on in,” he said and opened the door wider so she could step past him.

  He took her coat then led her down the hallway to the den, the same place where they’d so recently had their tiff. He hated his living room – too huge, formal and cold. He almost smiled to himself, wondering if for her the den brought back memories. It certainly did for him.

  She chose to sit in the single-seater La-Z-Boy.

  He remained standing by the door. “Would you like us to talk now?” he asked, “or would you like to share dinner with me? I did a little cooking this evening, if you don’t mind trying it out.”

  That made her smile. “You? Cook? You actually know how to turn on the stove?”

  “Hey, are you challenging me?” he growled, giving her a hearty glare. “We can do a cook-off anytime, anywhere. Just say when.”

  “All right, all right, no need to get competitive.” She put up her hands as if in self-defense but she was laughing. It was good to see a real smile back on her face. “You can cook, I believe it.” She slid out of the chair and onto her feet. “And I’d love to share your dinner.” Then she gave him a wry smile. “To tell the truth, I didn’t feel much like eating today but now I’m starving.”

  The twinkle was back in her eyes and it made Max wonder if she’d gotten over her trouble of that morning. But he wouldn’t ask. They’d get to that soon enough.

  But dinner with Silken was an unusually quiet affair. After taking her first bite and praising him for his culinary skills she didn’t say much. She responded to his question, his attempts at light conversation, but that was it. She didn’t put forward anything of her own. After the way she’d loosened up earlier he’d hoped she’d be back to normal but maybe he was expecting too much too soon. He would just have to be patient and let her work things out in her own time.

  “I’d like to talk now.”

  Max looked up from his plate, surprised. Those were the first unsolicited words she’d spoken since they’d sat down to eat. “Sure,” he said and got up. “Let me just drop the plates in the dishwasher.”

  When he got back from the kitchen she hadn’t moved. He sat down in the chair across from her, alert and ready to listen.

  She tilted her head. “Can we do this in the den? I feel more comfortable there.”

  “Sure,” he said again and got up to help her out of her chair. As far as he was concerned she could have anything she wanted just as long as it would get her to talk. This time Silken did not position herself in the single-seater chair. Instead, she dropped down in the couch then rested her hands demurely in her lap.

  He looked at her askance. Was this Suave in his house? Had the sisters conspired to play a trick on him? Where was the Silken he knew?

  But no. Silken was the woman he’d held in his arms, she was the one he’d kissed. He would know those eyes, those lips anywhere. But then, why was she acting so defeated?

  “You’re going to think this is stupid,” she said and gave a nervous laugh, “that I’m making a big deal out of nothing, but…I can’t help it. This means a lot to me.” She sighed. “And Suave.”

  He almost said, ‘yes, what is it’ but he held his tongue even though the suspense was killing him.

  “I…” she began then stopped. “We’re trying to find our mother.”

  Now that caught him by surprise. This was a lot more serious than he’d thought. This sounded like a matter for the police. “Your mother went missing? When?”

  She shook her head. “No, not ‘went missing’. She’s been missing since the day we were born.”

  Max stared back at her, confused. What the hell could she mean by that? And then it struck him. Of course. He deserved a kick for being so slow. “You and Suave were given up for adoption? At birth?”

  She smiled but it was a sad smile. “Not quite. For some reason we never quite made it into an adoptive home. I don’t know why. Probably because there were two of us, probably because we fell through the cracks,” she shrugged. “We lived in foster homes until we reached eighteen and then we got the hell out of the system.”

  Max almost shook his head in sympathy but he caught himself in time. He knew Silken and she was not the type to welcome sympathy. Instead, he grunted. “That must have been rough.”

  She shrugged. “It was, but we survived. Came out pretty good, all things considered.” Then she fell silent again and her face took on a faraway look.

  “But now,” he ventured, “you want to find your roots. Find your mother and figure out where you came from.”

  Her eyes refocused and when she turned to him it was almost with a look of gratitude. “You got it,” she said. “I have to find out who I am, where I came from. It’s like,” she waved her hands as if trying to find the words, “I’m not really Silken until I know where…this…all started.”

  “Have you tried working with an agency?”

  She nodded. “We tried that but it ended up being a total waste of money. Suave and I, just working with the internet, we were able to gather a lot more information than they did.”

  He leaned forward. “So you have a lead.”

  She grimaced. “Had. But it took us nowhere.” She shook her head. “We were so excited, thinking that this was it. We could hardly sleep after we made contact with the doctor who delivered us. And then we flew all the way to Wisconsin to see him and he dashed our hopes against the pavement. He knows who our mother is but he won’t tell.”

  “Doctor-patient confidentiality?”

  “Something like that.” This time her tone was bitter and she was blinking and frowning and scrunching up her face, almost like she was about to cry. “I could just wring his scrawny old neck,” she spat, her nostrils flaring and then she gasped and covered her face with her hands. “I’m sorry. That was a terrible thing to say. But I want my mother,” her shoulders began to shake, “I want to know her. I want…” she hiccupped and the tears began to seep through her fingers, “…I want to know my family.”

  Oh God, the tears. Max bit down on his bottom lip and his fingers clenched and unclenched. He wanted to go to her but she might brush him off, thinking he was trying to take advantage. But he couldn’t just sit there.

  What the heck. He would just have to take that chance. He went to her, sitting on the sofa right beside her, and pulled her into his arms.

  “I just want to know my mother, Max, my people,” she wailed as she turned her face into his shoulder. “Is that so bad? Everybody says I should drop it, but I can’t. I can’t.” And then she clung to him, sobbing and shaking while he held her close, stroking her back, letting her cry it all out on his shoulder.

  “It’s okay, honey,” he soothed. “It’s okay.” There was not much else he could say because what do you say to someone who has no mother? He couldn’t even imagine what that was like. As long as he’d
been on the earth he’d been privileged to have a father to guide him and a mother to spoil him. And even now, as old as he was, he knew they were there to give him advice or just to be his sounding board.

  This woman in his arms, his Silken, knew none of that. When she’d been a little girl and woke up in the night from a bad dream, who had been there to comfort her? And when she first discovered boys, who had been there to guide her? Even now that she was a grown woman she still needed that love, craved that relationship, cried for it. Thank God she had Suave. At least she was not totally alone.

  It took minutes before Silken’s body calmed and she sniffed then cuddled closer into him. Her breathing was still ragged but at least she was calmer.

  Max continued to hold her, saying nothing, just stroking her hair and listening to her breathe.

  Finally, she lifted her head and then looked up into his face. She gave him a wan smile. “Right now,” she said in a hoarse whisper, “I just want to forget. Can you kiss me? Please?”

  Max drew in his breath, not knowing how to respond to this. She was vulnerable now and the last thing he wanted to do was something he – or more accurately, she – would later regret…even if she’d been the one doing the asking. His eyes searched her face but all he saw there was pleading. And sadness.

  “Please,” she said again.

  This time he was powerless to resist. Lowering his head, he took her lips in a kiss that was soft and gentle, demanding nothing, just giving. He wanted her to draw from his strength, take comfort from his presence, forget all her sadness and bitter disappointment.

  She clung to him, almost as if in desperation, and then she was kissing him back with such fervor it was like she was trying to steal his very soul.

  He answered her plea by deepening the kiss, giving her all that she was begging for and more. She’d told him she wanted to forget and he would help her do just that. And if this was what would make her whole again, he would not deny her…because he wanted her to heal, to be bold, strong Silken again.