The Playboy's Baby

by Stewart, JM

  He glanced at her. “It must have been hard for you.”

  The soft sympathy in his eyes threatened to unravel the shroud she held around herself, the one that kept her from dissolving into a river of endless tears. Her strength of will, the need to keep moving, keep pushing forward, kept her sane. If Dillon didn’t stop looking at her like that, she might give in to the emotion and let it sweep her away. Then where would she be?

  She turned back to the display, looking over the teethers. Despite her previous thoughts, the words came anyway. Dillon’s body pressed lightly into her back, and the words came on a torrent of pent-up need. A need to share the pain with someone she knew would understand. To selfishly take the comfort his eyes promised.

  “To be honest, Dillon, I got lost for a while. Janey was all I had, and I only had enough energy for Annie.” She drew in a shuddering breath, the pain squeezing at her chest. “I just remember standing there staring at her casket, thinking she wasn’t supposed to be there. It all felt very surreal. I kept hoping I’d wake up and she’d be fine.

  “I didn’t even announce her death in the paper. I didn’t want the whole town showing up this time. I love them dearly. I love that they showed up for Mom, but it was too much. I didn’t have it in me to deal with that this time. I wanted a private service, family only.”

  There were only two cemeteries for the entire county, both of which sat ten miles outside of town. It wasn’t in the center of town, where everybody would pass it, and she’d counted on that fact. The cemetery itself contained miles of land, and the service took place darn near dead center. The funeral director had agreed to keep the funeral private. She was forever grateful to that kind little man for his help.

  Dillon’s hands slid onto her shoulders, a gentle comforting weight. “I’m sorry as hell you had to go through that by yourself.”

  Tears pricked at the backs of her eyelids. “Three days later, I was in her room when I found that note. That’s when I realized I’d forgotten all about you. I came down as soon as I could get time off. I thought for sure you’d angry with me.”

  Dillon’s head came down beside her ear, his voice a soothing murmur. “I’m not mad. You’re here now. That’s what counts. Okay?”

  She nodded, more grateful than she had words.

  He straightened, his body once again warm against her back. His fingers gently squeezed her shoulders. “You’re not alone, you know.”

  Her chest ached with the sweetness of the gesture. There was that soft, gentle side of him again. More than anything, she longed to turn and bury her face in his big chest, to lose herself in his smell and the warmth of his body. Then maybe she could forget the pain and loneliness her life had become. Every time he held her, she felt safe and protected.

  She reached back and settled her right hand over his, squeezing his fingers. “Thank you.” Her voice trembled with the emotion she barely held in check.

  The man confused the life out of her. He’d grown so different over the years. She expected cocky and careless, but had so far gotten gentle and kind. She had to fight not to lose herself in it, in him.

  She couldn’t. One night or twenty, the man had been Janey’s lover. That made him off limits. She didn’t go after her sister’s boyfriends. If she did, that would make her…

  She shook off the name that flitted through her mind, spoken at the time like a cruel taunt from a boy who blamed her for his awful intentions.

  Dillon was off limits, period. She had no desire to get involved with someone who’d never give her his heart. Someday she was going to find the courage to move beyond the past and into a real relationship, and she wanted someone who could give her every part of himself. Dillon couldn’t. He’d said so himself.

  Even knowing all of that, she still couldn’t bring herself to move away. They stood together for long moments in an oddly comfortable silence, in the middle of the department store aisle. Dillon didn’t move, and Emma couldn’t bring herself to break whatever spell held them captive. The solid strength of him felt too warm and reassuring. Maybe it was wrong, but she only wanted a teensy bit of the comfort he offered.

  “Where’s she buried?”

  “Beside Mom, in Whiteside Cemetery. It’s where she wanted to be.”

  “It’s where she should be. She’s home now.” He released her shoulders and stepped up beside her, shooting her a soft smile. “Come on. Let’s get this stuff back to the house. I need to get to the club soon.”

  * * *

  “You’ll be okay here by yourself tonight?”

  Back at the house a half hour later, Dillon stared at Emma. They stood at the end of the hallway, outside the kitchen. Annie on one hip, Emma watched him, softness in her eyes. Her tears earlier had wrenched a knot in his gut and somehow, leaving her felt wrong. Emma carried the weight of the world on her shoulders, and he’d give anything to take some of it from her.

  She laid a hand against his chest, her fingers warming his skin through his T-shirt. “I’m a big girl. I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time now.”

  “Well, my cell number’s on the fridge. Call if you need me.” He turned and headed for the front door. “We’ll set up the crib tomorrow. I should have a screwdriver around here somewhere.”

  “I take it you don’t use it much.”

  With one hand on the doorknob, he turned sideways to look at her. Her eyes twinkled, and his mouth curled into a grin of its own accord. She was gorgeous when she smiled like that, but that she directed it at him lightened his heart. “No. I usually pay people to set stuff up.”

  She laughed a light breathless sound that caressed his senses. “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”

  “What was it you used to call me? Spoiled rich boy?” He winked and turned to pull the door open, then paused and looked back again. “Oh. I want to take Annie to see my folks tomorrow. I’d like you to go with me.”

  She arched a brow. “For protection?”

  He grinned. She knew him entirely too well. “Pop won’t clobber me with you there. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  She smiled with softness in her eyes that made his heart flip over in his chest. “See you in the morning.”

  He shook his head and left the house. He’d probably spend all night looking forward to it.

  He had too.

  Seated at the kitchen table at three in the morning, Dillon ducked his head into his hands and rubbed his aching temples. It had been a long damn night. Most of it spent trying not to remember the feel of Emma’s body against him in the department store.

  The woman tied him in knots. The more time he spent with her, the less he remembered why he couldn’t have her. She tugged at something deep in his gut, a place he’d tried to deny for years. Never getting involved with a woman might prevent him from getting hurt, but it left him yearning for…more. Deep inside burned a need for more than trivial, on-the-surface interactions. He longed for someone to talk to at the end of the day. He set those emotions firmly aside when his relationship with Leila ended, but here they were again, wrapping around him like a familiar, warm blanket.

  “Long night?”

  At the sound of her voice, he lifted his head. Emma stood at the end of the hallway, in an ankle-length nightgown that reminded him of something his grandmother might wear. Shapeless and covering everything between her neck and feet. On Emma, it had the exact opposite effect. It heated his blood to watch the garment sway around her ankles. He couldn’t stop imagining what he’d find beneath it. Would he find only her? Maybe a pair of simple panties he’d peel off…

  He offered a weary smile. “Very. Month’s end inventory and one too many nasty drunks. How come you’re up?”

  She smiled and shrugged. “Can’t sleep. Been tossing and turning for hours. Thought I’d try some warm milk.”

  “Isn’t that an old wives tale?”

  Her mouth curled into a shy grin and she shrugged. “Mom used to give it to me when I was a kid. Always seems to work.” Hands folded t
ogether in front of her, she stepped forward, padding across the floor to him. “I can help with your headache if you like.”

  He closed his eyes and went back to rubbing his temples. Her touching him would be a very bad idea right then. He didn’t trust himself not to touch her. “I took some Tylenol. It’ll go away in a bit.”

  Her quiet footsteps grew closer, and soft hands slid onto his shoulders. Her fingers kneaded his flesh, working from his shoulders up the back of his neck. Her touch didn’t have the effect he suspected. Instead of heating him up, she eased knots and relaxed tight muscles.

  He surrendered and let his head loll forward, a low groan slipping from his lips. “You have magic fingers.”

  “Is it helping?”

  He grunted in approval. “You’re hired.”

  Her presence had his mind continuing to drift back over the night. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about how to get her to move back into town, and he came across a piece of information in the newspaper that spurred an idea. Someone had left the paper on his desk, turned to the real estate section. It all but jumped out at him. The house Emma grew up in was for sale.

  He needed his daughter close, preferably in town with him, but in order to get to Annie, he had to go through Emma first. Oh sure, he could do what he threatened and call his father’s lawyers and fight her for custody, but he didn’t have the heart to do that. After everything she’d been through, she didn’t deserve to be treated that way. This one simple task he could do for her.

  He needed to get her into town first, where he could take care of the both of them.

  “I have a proposition for you.”

  Her fingers moved up the back of his neck, kneading the spot at the base of his skull. “All right.”

  “Been thinking about it all night, actually. I could use an assistant at the club. Frankly I’d like to be able to spend more time down on the floor and less time doing all that damn paperwork. I could also use someone to keep track of the employees. I need people hired and I don’t have time to do interviews. Now, with Annie, I’m going to have even less time because I’d like to be able to cut my hours. You just can’t do eighty hours a week with a kid.”

  Her hands paused. “So you thought of me?”

  “Well, yes. It’s a position I need to fill and frankly, it’d get you back into town, but,” he sat forward and turned to face her, “more importantly, I need someone I can trust. Last month’s inventory was off by three hundred dollars and cash came up short by five.”

  “Somebody’s stealing.”

  “I’m having security cameras installed this week. I need to catch them in the act before I can start firing people. There are only one or two people I know I can trust, but to be honest, I’m half tempted to fire the rest and hire a whole new crew.” It bugged the hell out of him he didn’t know who to trust in his own place. Most of them had been there since he opened.

  Emma looked at her hands, resting on the back of the chair. “I’d have to quit my job.”

  He asked a lot. “Plus move back to town, I know. You’re perfect for the job. You could do this with your eyes closed. I’m prepared to pay you ten percent over what you’re making now, whatever it is. Benefits included.”

  She didn’t say anything for a moment, but stood twisting her fingers together before finally looking at him. “I need some time to think about it.”

  He nodded. “Of course. When you go back to work on Wednesday, if you do decide to commute, I’ll cover your expenses.”

  She drew in a heavy breath, her chest rising and falling. “I wanted to talk to you about that. I’m afraid I’m not planning to commute. I’ll bring Annie home with me during the week, and we can stay with you on the weekends.”

  He drew his brows together and shook his head. “I want my daughter to stay here.”

  Emma let out a long tired sigh. “I can’t commute, Dillon. That’s three hours of driving every day. On top of nine hours at the office. That makes for a hell of a day.”

  “Then you’ll leave her with me and come back on the weekends.” He hoped she wouldn’t, but Dillon braced himself for an emphatic denial. Emma Stanton was overprotective and always had been.

  Her body tensed, concern a palpable emotion in her eyes. “No offense Dillon, but you don’t know the first thing about babies. You said so yourself. Do you even know CPR?”

  “I recertified six months ago.” Her intense rejection bothered him. Taking care of Annie would give him the opportunity to prove he was a capable, dependable adult, not the careless teen she remembered. He cocked a brow. “Surely you don’t think I’d hurt her?”

  She looked down and shook her head. “No. Of course not, but babies are tricky.”

  He leaned his elbow on the back of the chair. “Then how ’bout we make a bet on it? That I can take care of Annie until you come back on Saturday.”

  Her chin ratcheted up a notch. “I’m coming back Friday night.”

  He shook his head. “I want till Saturday morning. That gives me three days. Four if you count tomorrow.”

  She folded her arms. “How do you expect to care for a baby when you haven’t even changed a diaper yet? You said it yourself, you don’t get up before noon. Annie gets up at six. What if you’re sound asleep and don’t hear her cry? Who’ll watch her while you’re at work?”

  He sighed. “Look, you have a point, but I need to learn to do this eventually. You aren’t going to be here to hold my hand forever, nor do I want you to be. She’s my daughter. I want to learn to take care of her. I agree with you, she deserves a father. A good one. I want to give it to her.”

  Emma nodded but otherwise didn’t say anything. Seeing his opportunity, he stood and faced her.

  “You can teach me before you leave. While you’re gone, if I need help, I’ll call my mother. Once she finds out about Annie, I’ll have a hard time keeping her away. And until I get used to her routine, I’ll move Annie into my room to make sure I hear her. The truth is if you thought I was going to be a horrible father, you wouldn’t be here in the first place. I’d like a chance to prove your trust isn’t misplaced.”

  Emma stared at him for a long moment, eyes searching his face. Finally, she drew her brows together and poked a finger into his chest. “You have to stick to her schedule. Annie gets very fussy when it’s disrupted.”

  He grabbed her finger in his fist, resisting the urge to use the purchase to pull her closer. Damn she was sexy when she looked at him like that. He’d always thought so. Now, after the night he’d had, he was hard-pressed not to bend down and taste her mouth. The look on her face made him wonder again at the passion his instinct told him lay beneath the surface.

  “Fine. Write her schedule down. In fact, I’ll get up with you tomorrow morning so you can walk me through the whole thing. Anything else?”

  She pulled her finger back and folded her arms across her chest. “Who’s going to take care of her while you’re at the club?”

  “I’ll cut my hours back so I can be home with her more.” He’d have to cut his hours in half actually. “I have no doubt my mother will be thrilled to watch her when I’m not here.”

  His mother constantly hounded him and Logan about settling down. No doubt she’d be thrilled with the idea of being a grandparent. His father worried him more.

  “Besides, I work at night. Annie will be sleeping most of the time anyway.”

  Emma’s eyes narrowed. “We get your mother’s approval before I leave and you have to call me every day to tell me how she is.”

  He couldn’t resist the smile. “You drive a hard bargain, Em.”

  Doubt filled her eyes. “What are we betting for, anyway?”

  He hadn’t thought about that, but it took his brain all of three seconds to come up with an answer. He knew damn well what he wanted from her. Had for years.

  “A kiss.” The words slipped from his lips before he could stop them, but once out, he didn’t want to take them back. “One kiss after you come back and
see she’s all right.”

  He knew he was taking advantage of the situation, but he couldn’t help himself. One taste. He only wanted one taste of her mouth. Then maybe he could get it out of his system and forget about this insane attraction.

  “If I fail…well, then you can tell me I told you so and never leave me alone with her again.” He prayed it wouldn’t come to that.

  Emma shook her head. “That’s not what I want for her, Dillon.”

  He held his hand out. “So, is it a deal then?”

  Emma stared at him. Her chest rose and fell at an increasingly rapid pace. A soft pink flush slid into her cheeks. The yearning in her eyes threw him for a loop. He’d never get used to seeing her look at him with such blatant hunger. Sweet tension spiked between them, making his jeans increasingly uncomfortable. He was hard-pressed not to pull her into his arms, for the simple need to feel her against him.

  He expected her to flat out deny him. Or slap him. Or both. To his surprise, she shoved her hand into his, her gaze bold and unapologetic. “Deal.”

  Chapter Six

  Seated at the dining room table, Emma smiled. Across the room, Dillon lay stretched out on the sofa, feet propped on one arm, head on the other. He had both arms wrapped protectively around Annie, on his chest, both of them sound sleep.

  They’d had a rough morning. He’d done what he’d promised—gotten up early with her. Despite being exhausted, he spent the morning going through Annie’s routine. Emma showed him how to do everything from warming bottles to changing diapers and made him do it all. He’d fumbled through most of it, once again completely out of his element. For a big man, he was surprisingly gentle.

  Annie seemed to adore him, had been caught between smiling at his goofy faces and fussing at the new person in charge of her care. Constantly looking to Emma for reassurance, she refused to eat much lunch, and naptime became a battle of wills. Dillon conked out before Annie, who, in the end, simply laid her head on his chest and went to sleep.