The Child Between Them

by Helen Lacey

  Her phone beeped and she quickly looked at the message. It was the second one that morning.

  Can we please talk? M.

  She ignored him, having already responded that morning with a resounding no.

  She left Julie a little while later and spent an hour or so in town, doing errands. She was walking past Millie’s when she saw Levi Miller outside the real estate office next door. She was about to turn on her heels and head left when he hailed her down.

  “Mornin’,” he said and smiled.

  Holly had to admit that he was a handsome devil. Tall and lean with broad shoulders and pale blue eyes, and a smile that would once have sent her belly fluttering. But now she was immune to good-looking men. The less of them that were in her life, the better.

  “Good morning,” she said blandly. “It’s nice to see you again.”

  He laughed. “Oh, yeah, I’m sure it is. Marshall told me you turned him down…he’s pretty cut up about it.”

  Holly gritted her teeth. “I’m sure he’ll survive.”

  “I don’t know,” Levi mused and looked at the houses and shop fronts for sale and lease in the real estate window. “He usually doesn’t get worked up about things.”

  “I’m delighted to hear he’s telling the world about our business,” she snapped irritably.

  “The world? Not likely. Just his family…me and Nate and Sam and Marshall are like brothers. You know that.”

  She did. She just wasn’t feeling all warm and fuzzy about it at that moment. “I’m glad he’s got someone to talk to,” she managed to say.

  “What about you, Red?” he asked and clearly saw her grimace at the nickname because he grinned. “You need someone to talk to?”

  Holly pushed back her shoulders. “I have friends, thank you.”

  “Feel like grabbing a cup of coffee?”

  “Certainly not.”

  He laughed. “Oh, yeah, you two are perfect for each other. Both uptight. And you sure are interesting to watch from the sidelines.”

  “I must tell Sam to give you another black eye,” she said blankly. “Or maybe you should tell your good buddy Marshall that you are asking me out and flirting because you clearly think you are irresistible.”

  He laughed again. “Tell him yourself,” he said and hooked a thumb in the direction of the real estate office. “He’s in there.”

  Then the door opened and Marshall appeared, looking gorgeous in his regulation jeans and checked shirt. He looked at her and his mouth twitched.

  “Good morning,” he said quietly.

  “Hi,” she said, her stomach doing somersaults.

  Levi laughed again. “Oh, come on kids, enough with the glum faces. Why don’t you kiss and make up?”

  “Why don’t you get the hell out of here?” Marshall said to his friend and moved sideways, half blocking her. “I’ll catch up with you later.”

  Levi grinned, saluted and walked off, chuckling as though he thought them hilarious.

  Once he disappeared around the block, Marshall turned to face her.

  “He’s such a jerk,” she said, arms crossed. “He asked me to have coffee with him.”

  “And what did you say?”

  “Obviously I said no.”

  “Is that your word of the week?”

  It was an easy dig and she raised both her brows. “Touché,” she said and motioned to the real estate office. “What are you doing here?”

  He shrugged and pulled a sheet of paper from his pocket. “This is a list of all the vacant shop premises in town,” he said and waved the paper. “I thought you might be interested in looking at something…if you were thinking of setting up your business.”

  “My business?”

  “For you to make your fancy cakes.”

  Holly didn’t bother to hide her shock. “Isn’t that a little presumptuous?”

  He shrugged. “I want you to have a reason to stay in town.”

  You need to be the reason…

  She almost screamed the words at the tops of her lungs. “I don’t think—”

  “I could help you with set-up costs,” he said quietly. “Get you started. Maybe a business partnership.”

  Stunned, Holly stared at him. “Why would you do that?”

  His gaze dropped to her abdomen. “You’re the mother of my child, Holly. That’s all the motive I need.”

  It sounded altruistic and generous, but Holly wasn’t going to be swayed. He liked getting his own way and was determined to do whatever he had to do in order to see that through.

  She shrugged, trying to make light of his suggestion, even though the idea of her own business, her own shop, where she could bake and create and be her most authentic self, thrilled her from the soles of her feet to the roots of her hair. Whatever his motives, it was the first time anyone had ever made her feel as though it was possible.

  “My family is rich,” she announced and smiled humorlessly. “I don’t need your money. I have to go,” she said, but lingered for a moment and grabbed the paper from his hand, quickly noticing something was different.

  He no longer wore his wedding ring!

  “You…you took it off? I mean, your ring.”

  He followed her gaze and shrugged. “It seemed the right time. Although in hindsight, the right time would have been before I proposed marriage to the woman having my baby.”

  The way he talked about their baby made her stomach do loop-the-loops. But it wasn’t enough. She couldn’t let it be enough.

  “Too little, too late,” she said.

  He winced. “I’m sorry, Holly. All I seem to do is screw up with you.”

  “I’ll talk to you later,” she said and scurried off, determined that he wouldn’t see the tears in her eyes. And the ache in her heart.

  *****

  Holly spent the next three days in a kind of limbo, working, eating, existing. On Thursday morning, after managing quite successfully to not be cornered by Sam all week so he could give her a lecture about his friend, Holly was out of luck. It was closing time and she was sending out a few account letters when he locked the door and came around the desk, looking kind, but serious.

  “Okay, you’ve had a few days to think about it. Are you going to marry him, or not?”

  Holly wondered how she’d managed to maneuver herself into a life where everyone felt the need to know everyone else’s business. Or more specifically, her business.

  “I think that’s between me and Marshall, don’t you?”

  He shrugged. “We’re like—”

  “Brothers?” she queried, cutting him off. “Yeah, I got the same story from Levi. And it’s kind of sweet that everyone feels the need to close ranks and protect him, but I’m still not going to talk about our relationship.”

  “I understand,” he said and nodded. “Believe me, I know what it’s like to have all your friends thinking they know what’s best for you. When my ex left town, and me, everyone thought they knew exactly what I was feeling and what I needed. But they didn’t. Still, I probably wouldn’t have come out the other end of the whole ordeal as quickly, had it not been for that support.”

  “Your point?” she asked.

  Sam sighed heavily. “He’s a good guy, Holly. And he wants to do the right thing.”

  “I know,” she admitted. “But what’s right for him, isn’t necessarily what’s right for me.”

  “I think in his own way, he does lo—”

  “Please,” she said and put up her hand. “Don’t. It’s not enough. I need…more.”

  Sam looked at her kindly. “You’re in love with him, right?”

  God, was it that obvious? Is that what everyone thought, that she was pining after him like a love-sick schoolgirl? First Julie, now Sam? Even the pain in the ass Levi seemed to have an opinion about it. She felt pathetic and foolish right down to the marrow in her bones.

  “I don’t see how that’s anyone else’s concern.”

  “Maybe,” he said, his words so quiet she coul
d barely hear them. “Maybe it’s not about what you need. Maybe this whole situation, you coming to town and getting this job, you meeting one another, you getting together and your pregnancy…maybe it’s only ever been about what he needs. Another chance,” Sam said and smiled. “A chance to see that sometimes life doesn’t always take. And that sometimes, when you least expect it, life gives…it gives back. It gives hope. It gives you love, even if you’re not ready for it. Even if you can’t see it for what it is.”

  Her eyes burned. And suddenly, she felt the truth of Sam’s words seep into the depths of her soul. For weeks, months, she’d been so absorbed with what she wanted, what she needed, she hadn’t considered that Marshall needed what she had to offer. Her strength. Her heart. Her love.

  She thought about everything they had shared in the last couple of weeks. Their budding friendship. Being lovers. Laughing. Having fun together. All the things that really do make up a relationship. And suddenly it all made perfect sense.

  I’m such a fool…

  “You’re a good friend, Sam,” she said quietly. “Thank you.”

  She nodded, collected her bag and headed directly for Marshall’s house. It was dusk, but the porch sensor light flicked on the moment her toe touched the bottom step. She heard Reggie bark and then the door flung open.

  He looked tired. And she realized he had lost a little weight. She wondered if he was eating right. If he was sleeping. He wore jeans that rode low on his hips and his shirt was undone and the white tank underneath molded over his chest and abdomen. Like always, her own body reacted, as awareness licked along her skin and pooled deep into her blood.

  “Holly…”

  She stared at him, meeting his wary gaze.

  All I seem to do is screw up with you…

  There had been real pain in his voice when he’d said those words to her a few days earlier. She looked at his left hand. Still no ring. She knew what that must have cost him. She also knew what she had to do.

  “Okay.”

  He blinked and shook his head. “Okay?”

  Holly took a deep breath. “I will marry you.”

  Chapter Twelve

  The thing about being engaged, Marshall discovered a few days after Holly had arrived on his doorstep and announced that she would become his wife, was that everyone seemed to have an opinion about the upcoming nuptials. His friends. Her friends. Even Reggie stared at him with an odd expression that he couldn’t fathom.

  It had been a strange few days. Holly hadn’t stayed the night after she’d agreed to marry him. And he hadn’t asked her to. In fact, their relationship had taken on a weird kind of energy. She had left quickly after accepting his proposal, and the following day they had gone into town to buy an engagement ring. She’d chosen something low key, a plain band inset with a few diamonds that looked nice on her hand, but wasn’t anywhere near as extravagant as he’d anticipated. Or been prepared to purchase. There was no need to get the ring re-sized and the jeweler had made some joke about the thing doubling as a wedding band.

  On Monday, after a weekend of battling with his sense of what was right, and what was expected, Marshall picked her up at midday and they met for an appointment with a local marriage celebrant to discuss the detail and arrange for a license and to set a date. Holly wanted a garden wedding. Nothing fancy. Just a few guests. In four weeks. Nate and Joley had jumped at the chance for the wedding to take place on Gwendonna and he had to admit it was the perfect place to get hitched.

  Even though it really was the last thing he wanted to do.

  That’s what was churning him up inside. His integrity. Which had flown spectacularly out of the window. He hadn’t intended for his proposal to be a false offer—but days later, with the very real prospect of Holly soon becoming his wife, Marshall knew that he was in way over his head.

  The idea became even more unwelcome when Dawn and Tom Willows visited him at the store on Tuesday morning.

  “Is it true?” she asked, looking stern and disapproving and expecting more explanation than he was prepared to give. She had obviously heard about his engagement. He wasn’t surprised. Once they’d bought a ring and talked with an officiate, he suspected it wouldn’t be long before the whole town knew their plans.

  He nodded, grateful that there weren’t any customers in the place at that moment. “Yes. I’m marrying Holly.”

  Dawn’s mouth thinned. “This is the same girl you told us you’d only recently started dating?”

  “That’s right.”

  “Have you no consideration for our feelings at all, Marshall?”

  He pushed back his irritation. He knew these people well. They were like parents to him. And they had been rocks when his own parents had died. They had earned his respect, not his censure. He wasn’t about to lose his cool and say things he didn’t mean.

  “Of course, I do,” he said quietly, aware that Donny was hovering in the background. “We all loved Lynette and—”

  “You’re talking about our daughter in the past tense,” his mother-in-law admonished. “You’ve never done that before.”

  “I only meant,” he said quietly, “that she will always hold a special place in my heart. I can’t change the past. I can’t bring her back. I would if I could.”

  “Except it wouldn’t sit well with your plans to marry this new girl,” Tom said coolly.

  Marshall sighed. “Her name is Holly and you’ve met her twice. I really don’t want this transition to be hard, okay? And I—”

  Dawn’s gaze flicked to his left hand. “You took off you wedding ring?”

  He nodded. “It was time,” he said gently, thinking about how he’d labored over the notion for days, and then when he finally slipped the band off his finger, how little difference it made to how he felt about Lynette, his loss, about Holly and the baby. He’d worn the ring as a symbol of his commitment to his wife…but he didn’t need the gold band to cherish her memory.

  “Is she pregnant?” Dawn asked. “Is that why you’re marrying her?”

  He nodded, figuring there was little point in denying what would soon be obvious to the world. “Yes, she’s expecting a baby. We’re having a baby.”

  His mother-in-law’s expression crumbled and Marshall experienced an acute and painful clenching in his gut. He hated hurting people—especially two people who had always treated him like an adored son. Guilt struck him between the shoulder blades. He didn’t want to be at odds with them. He didn’t want to be at odds with anyone he cared about. But he didn’t know how to get them to understand.

  When Dawn spoke, her words were hard to hear. “Lynette wanted children…”

  “Lynette and I decided not to have children,” he said gently. “Because it might have hastened her death.”

  “I guess we’ll never know, will we?” Dawn said quietly and sniffed. “This isn’t like you Marshall…you’ve always cared about the feelings of others. You’ve always been a man of principles. I can’t believe this girl has made you abandon those values in a matter of weeks.”

  It was a harsh statement and one he knew he had to ignore. Dawn and Tom were good people…but they were still grieving and in pain and that was clearly clouding their judgement.

  If Lynette was alive she would have given them a stern talking to. If Lynette was alive, he reminded himself, then none of the chaos he was experiencing would actually have happened.

  Liar.

  Because Holly would still have moved to town. Holy would still be working at Sam’s clinic. Holly would still exist. And he would still have had the same reaction to her.

  And his principles would have been catastrophically abandoned!

  “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I know you’re disappointed. And I understand why you feel the way you do. But I have to do what’s right for my child.”

  They left moments later and Marshall headed out to his workshop and continued working on one of the pieces he had on order. It relaxed him a little and he was about to take a break an
d make coffee when Donny stuck his head around the door and said he had a visitor.

  Holly.

  She wore a short denim dress and cowboy boots and he almost dropped to his knees at the sight of her. She carried a basket and a wide smile.

  “Good morning,” she said and came into the room.

  Marshall resisted the urge to kiss her. Had their relationship been orthodox, he might have taken her in his arms, tasted her sweet mouth and made out with her for a while. But he didn’t.

  “I didn’t expect to see you today,” he remarked and came around one of the tables.

  She shrugged. “I brought you a treat,” she said and shook the basket. “As I recall, you never did get to taste that cake I made a while back. So, I baked this morning.”

  His brows rose. “You baked me a cake?”

  “Yep. But I can’t stay. I just told Sam I’d drop this off and then I have to get back to the clinic.”

  Marshall’s insides contracted. There was an odd intimacy about the moment. They had parted almost casually the previous day, with Marshall dropping her home after their outing at the marriage celebrant. Other than the necessary talk, they spoke little over the course of the day. It was though they were both acting on auto-pilot, saying the right things, but actually saying very little.

  He managed a smile and watched as she placed the basket on the counter.

  “What’s that?” she asked, pointing to an object that was covered in a sheet.

  “Just something I’m working on,” he said vaguely and hovered around the item, ensuring she didn’t pull back the sheet. “For a client.”

  “Can I see it?”

  “No,” he replied. “Where’s my cake?”

  She grinned and fiddled with a few things inside the basket before pulling out a plate covered in plastic wrap and a fork. When she passed it to him their fingertips touched and Marshall felt the connection throughout his entire body. He met her gaze, noticed that her gaze lingered on his mouth for a moment and quickly wondered if she was thinking about kissing him.