Finally My Forever

by Brooke St. James

  Thomas came to stand next to me. He stood close enough where our shoulders were touching and put his hand in mine, interlacing our fingers.

  "You have some pretty cool friends, Thomas," I said. "I'm sure glad you let me come meet them today."

  "Oh, you can come back tomorrow too," Thomas assured me, nodding his head as he stared at me seriously.

  I smiled.

  "She has a job, Thomas," Claire said. "It's a lot to ask for her to come do that for you guys—even once."

  "You're not coming back?" he asked with real, true fear in his eyes.

  "Of course I'll be back," I promised. I glanced at Claire. "Maybe we can set up something for a weekly or biweekly basis. Would that work for you?"

  "That would be amazing!" she said.

  Thomas continued to hold my hand, snuggling closer to me.

  "I won't always need to be outside," I said.

  "That'll be fine. You can just take over the art room if you want. Amanda's done in there at 5."

  "Are we gonna do the Cokes again?" Thomas asked staring at me.

  "Maybe sometime," I said, "but I have some other cool experiments for you guys to check out first."

  He held my hand to his chest and gave me a huge smile. I returned it before looking at Claire. "Wednesday nights should be fine, but I'll get in touch with you about setting up a regular time."

  "That sounds wonderful!" She reached out to hug me, and I hugged her back with one arm since Thomas still had a grip on me.

  "I'm gonna go home and eat some dinner," I said, looking at Thomas. "I guess I'll see you next time. Thanks again for having me."

  "You can eat dinner at our house," he said.

  I smiled at Claire, hoping that hadn't made her feel uncomfortable. "Oh, thanks for the offer, but my little dog's waiting for me at home. If I took too long, he would wonder where I was."

  "You have a dog?"

  "I sure do. His name's Roscoe. He's a scruffy, brown mutt."

  "Can he come next time?" Thomas asked, looking out of the corner of his eyes at his mom.

  "Carly can bring her dog if she wants to," Claire said. "I'm sure everyone would love to meet Roscoe… as long as he doesn't bite or anything."

  "He's really friendly."

  Thomas pumped his fist before raising his hand above his head in the famous Thomas pose. "Yessss!" he said.

  Claire turned off the overhead light, and we started making our way to the door. "Are you sure you can't come for dinner?" she asked.

  She seemed sincere with the invitation, but I instantly shook my head in refusal. "Thanks so much for the offer, but I have to get home."

  "Micah's coming to eat, isn't he, Mom?"

  "As far as I know," she said.

  We were walking when Thomas said that, and I seriously almost tripped. I had to concentrate on each step to keep from losing my balance. Man, why hadn't I just agreed to go eat? There was no way I could change my mind now, though. That would be totally obvious.

  Thomas was still holding my hand as we walked out together. "Micah's my baby brother," he said, as his mom locked the door.

  "He's not really a baby anymore, though, is he?" Claire asked, adjusting her purse.

  "He's younger than me," Thomas reminded her.

  "I met him," I said, smiling. "I think he was here the day when I came to help paint." I had to bite my own cheek to keep from laughing at myself for saying "I thought" he was there. Who was I kidding?

  "He was?" Thomas asked with a doubtful expression.

  "She probably did meet him," Claire agreed. "I'm sure he came up for the weekend to help."

  "Is he coming over to eat tonight?" Thomas asked again, rubbing salt in an open wound.

  "As far as I know, baby," she said, patiently.

  I wanted desperately to ask the unaskable questions. How's Micah? What's he look like now? What's he doing? And the most important question of all… Is he single? I could never ask any of these questions, especially since I'd just acted like I wasn't even sure if I'd met him in the first place. What a dork.

  "I guess you have to get home to your dog," Thomas said as we parted ways in the driveway.

  "Yep," I said. "I'll tell him he gets to come up here sometime. He'll be excited."

  "Maybe you can bring him to the fall festival too," Thomas said. "I think it's tomorrow."

  I glanced at Claire, and she smiled at me. "You are welcome to come to the fall festival he's talking about. One of the members of our church has a big farm, and he has us out there every year. There's always a big turn out, and Roscoe's welcome to come too…" she smirked at Thomas. "But it's not tomorrow, silly. It's in a few weeks—the third Saturday of the month, whatever the date is."

  "There's a corn maze, and a bonfire, and a hayride. Everybody plays football and capture the flag, and roasts weenies and marshmallows. And there's a hayride. Did I already say that?"

  "That sounds like a lot of fun." I said.

  "So you're coming?" he asked.

  "Yeah, I'll come if you're sure it's okay."

  "Oh sure, it's open to everybody," Claire said.

  But it was overshadowed by Thomas throwing his hands in the air. "Yessss! Carly's coming with us to the fall-all-all festival!"

  We hugged goodbye as we started toward our respective vehicles. "I'll see you before then, though," I promised. "I'll come back and do some more science with you next week."

  "We're looking forward to it," Claire said, waving at me with her keys in her hand.

  I was relatively sure that fall festival was the same weekend I'd be moving into my new place, but there was no way I was missing it, especially after botching the dinner invitation.

  I knew better than to get my heart set on seeing Micah there, though, since a young, hot rockstar like him probably had better things to do than attend a church festival. I tried to tell myself I was going for Thomas and I really didn't care whether or not I saw his brother, but that was untrue. I loved Thomas, and would be happy to go to the festival even if I knew for sure Micah wouldn't be there, but wow, what a bonus it would be if he was there. I didn't even care if he was married. I just wanted to see what he looked like—how he'd changed over the past five years.

  Did I just have the thought that I didn't care if he was married? Of course I cared if he was married. It would be a super-wonderful day if I went to the festival, saw him, and he was not married, engaged, or otherwise taken. It would be the best day ever if he scooped me into his arms and we rode off into the sunset together. I could be married into this amazing family and live happily ever after with no more nightmares or scary crap happening to me. The end.

  I was having all these thoughts as I dug for my keys and opened the door to my car, and I was smiling the whole time, well aware of how silly I was being.

  "Bye Carly!" Thomas yelled, drawing me from my daydream. "I'll see you soon!"

  "Bye Thomas!" I yelled back.

  "I love you!" he yelled.

  There was absolutely no way I would leave him hanging, so without hesitation, I yelled, "I love you too!"

  I drove off wondering what it would have been like if I would have accepted their dinner invitation. Would we have eaten and then curled up on the couch together for a little television and dessert? Maybe Thomas would have told Micah all about the experiment we did and Micah would think I was really awesome for being a science teacher. Maybe he was still gorgeous and this time he was unattached, and he'd walk me out to my car and kiss me at the end of the glorious, fun-filled evening.

  I had to laugh at myself yet again. I should have been a writer with this kind of imagination.

  Chapter 10

  I thought about Micah quite a bit that night after the Bennetts invited me to dinner and I refused, but just as they'd done five years before, thoughts of him faded from my mind as the days went on. They faded even more quickly this time because I was in a different place with my outlook on men and relationships.

  Looking back, I could recognize
and appreciate that Zeke wasn't my life's love—maybe we weren't even a great match, but losing a boyfriend that way made me skittish about moving forward. I really didn't have much interest in building another relationship right away. In the four years since it happened, I'd purposefully kept myself too busy to even think about it. I finished my degree and teaching certificate quickly, and worked retail the whole time I was in college. In the back of my mind, I always assumed I would marry and start a family one day, but I hadn't even slowed down enough to consider anyone.

  Micah's temporary entry into my thoughts was the first time in a long time I'd even thought about a guy in that way. Just the idea of him awakened a giddy feeling that I hadn't even realized I'd been missing. It made me feel good—like maybe I was turning some sort of corner.

  That giddy feeling started up again as I drove to the address the Bennetts gave me as the location for the fall festival.

  I had no idea what to expect, so I was completely taken aback when I pulled onto the property to find a huge party. There was a gigantic farmhouse front and center with a barn and several other buildings on the property. Some of the land was wooded and some cleared. It was gorgeous, and exponentially bigger than I anticipated.

  There was a whole area over to the left that was roped off as a parking lot. A man wearing a safety vest motioned for me to drive down the fourth row of cars. There must have been more than a hundred cars there already. It was a much bigger deal than I expected, and I got nervous and shaky all of a sudden.

  I drove down the row he indicated and parked about twenty cars back. I sat in my car for a minute, considering whether or not I wanted to go through with it or just turn right around and leave. I figured since there were so many people there, my chances of seeing Micah were good, but I honestly wasn't prepared for such a big deal, and was almost too nervous to stay.

  I wondered how the parking attendant would react to someone who left right away. Would he stop me and ask if everything was all right, or could I just wave goodbye and drive off? Funny that the opinion of the parking lot attendant was even a factor. I laughed at myself as I checked the mirror for lip-gloss on my teeth or any other embarrassing things.

  I had on a pair of tight fitting jeans with a cranberry colored sweater and a few necklaces. My dark brown hair fell over my shoulders. It was usually quite a bit shorter, but that was because I normally wore it curly. Tonight, I took the time to style it straight, and it seemed much longer. I ran a hand through it, checking for tangles.

  Just then, a huge SUV full of kids pulled up and parked in the spot next to mine. Their family got out and began walking toward the farmhouse, which prompted me to stop stalling and do the same.

  Several other groups were walking up to the action at the same time as me, and I couldn't help but notice that they were all carrying pots or pans. Obviously, it was some sort of potluck and I was showing up empty handed. My nerves escalated.

  I followed everyone to a huge pavilion on the far side of the main house. The majority of the crowd was gathered there, and I knew it was my best shot at finding the Bennetts. The pavilion was full of tables and was packed with people sitting around them and standing up talking.

  I should've texted Claire Bennett from the parking lot to let her know I was coming, but I didn't think about it at the time. I settled for walking up looking like a lost lamb.

  I stared into the crowd, searching every table for a familiar face. "Carlyyyy!" I heard. It was Thomas's voice yelling out to me like a beacon of hope. I smiled at the sight of him walking toward me with his hands in the air.

  "Thomassss!" I said as he approached me. "I didn't know if I'd be able to find you in this crowd," I said, hugging him.

  He pulled back and regarded me with an extremely serious expression. I had no idea what he was thinking. "You don't like it?" he asked, seeming concerned.

  I smiled. "Oh, no, I like it. I just thought I was lost for a second." He patted my back. "You're not lost. You're right here."

  I let out a relieved giggle. "Yes I am," I said.

  He touched my hair. "What happened to your hair?"

  "I straightened it," I said. "Do you like it?"

  "Yeah, my mom and Emily straighten their hair too," he said. "I saw that hot thing they clamp on it." He flexed his hand demonstrating the use of a flatiron, which made me giggle.

  He drug me over to the table where his parents were sitting with four other people I didn't recognize. They greeted me and told me how happy they were that I could make it before instructing Thomas to bring me to the food area so I could make myself a plate. I started to refuse, but Thomas took me by the hand and began dragging me away immediately.

  There was an area at the center of the pavilion with several long buffet tables. Every inch of them was covered with food. I didn't even know where to begin. There were at least thirty different types of soups and chilis in slow cookers and a ton of casseroles. Thomas and I stood in line, and I chose a few options that I hoped wouldn’t end in a mess. I was holding a plate, but Thomas made sure I got a bowl of the tortilla soup their family brought, so my hands ended up completely full.

  As if that wasn't enough, he insisted I go to the dessert table. There was a group of girls that looked to be my age standing around it when we approached.

  "Who's your friend?" one of them asked Thomas.

  He put his arm around my shoulders, almost making me spill the food I was balancing. "This is my best friend, Carly," he said.

  The girl who asked smiled so brightly that, for some reason, it seemed fake. Then she stuck out her bottom lip a little, making a pouty face. "I thought I was your best friend," she said. She was obviously the ringleader. The other two just watched her, waiting to see what she'd say next.

  Thomas got a little shifty at the thought of making her sad. "Carly comes to the Happy House and teaches science class," he said.

  "Well, maybe I should come over there and hang out with you guys sometime," she said, with that same sugary sweet smile. "I've been meaning to do that."

  The other girls nodded their agreement.

  "I'm Gina," she said, holding her hand out for me to shake. This was impossible since I had a bowl in one hand and a plate in the other. I awkwardly extended my elbow in her direction and she scoffed for a split-second before pasting on that huge smile again.

  "Carly," I said.

  "How do you know the Bennetts?" she asked, shamelessly sizing me up.

  I'd gone through high school and college. I knew a mean girl when I saw one; I was just surprised to find one at a church function—especially since she was the first new person I met.

  "I volunteer at the Happy House," I said, answering her question. I wanted to add that Thomas had already mentioned that, but I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt and keep it friendly.

  "My sister said you want to kiss Micah," I heard Thomas say.

  I was stunned at his words and thought for a terrible second he was talking to me, but my head whipped around to see that he was staring straight at Gina."

  "Me?" she asked, nervously putting a hand to her chest.

  The girls standing next to her giggled and put their hands over their mouths simultaneously like twins.

  "Emily said that?" Gina asked looking shocked and appalled. Her cheeks began to turn red and she seemed a little angry.

  I figured she might say something rude to Thomas so I said, "She was probably mistaken. Come on Thomas, show me where we should sit to eat."

  I turned and started walking off, and Thomas followed, but that didn't stop him from saying, (at full volume) "No she said Gina loves my brother and wanted to kiss him real bad."

  "Okay, help me find your parents' table," I whispered, walking away as quickly as my feet could take me.

  I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Gina's face turning bright red. I had to love Thomas. I thought about how she was sizing me up and wondered if her crush on Micah had anything to do with that. I was sure it did.


  "So does your brother live in San Antonio now?" I asked as we headed to the table, but were out of earshot of Gina. I figured it was a good time to ask since Micah had just been brought up.

  "He lives 1.7 miles from me," Thomas said. "He used to live 82 miles from me, but he moved home after his car wreck."

  "Your brother got in a car wreck?" I asked, slowing to a stop in between two random tables.

  Thomas nodded, but looked a bit distracted.

  "Was he okay?" I asked, not ready to drop it.

  "I have some scars, but I survived. Who's asking?" Thomas' face broke into a huge grin and he raised his hands above his head, nearly knocking the soup out of my hand. Maybe it was my nerves that almost made me drop the soup, but either way, it almost fell.

  "Micahhh!" Thomas said. He looked at me. "Here's my baby brother right here," he said pointing at the guy who had spoken.

  He was sitting at a table that was not anywhere near Claire and Jesse Bennett. I couldn't believe I had asked about him and we were standing only inches away. I instantly glanced around his table to find that he was sitting with a bunch of young people—probably my age or even younger.

  I watched as Micah turned to face me. My heart was beating incredibly fast and seconds felt like hours as he faced me and begin taking me in.

  Why was I standing their holding a bunch of food like a big dork?

  He had changed. He seemed bigger—more masculine. A lot happens to a guy between 19 and 24. They go from being a boy to a man during that time, and the person I saw staring at me was definitely a man. He had the same gorgeous features, but he had filled out. I barely recognized him. His hair was still shaggy, but I could clearly see a scar on the right side of his face that went from his forehead, over the end of his eyebrow, and onto his cheek. It was undeniably handsome on him. I stared at it for a second, wondering if that was from the car accident before letting my eyes meet his. Those piercing green eyes had me feeling weak and shaky.