by Jill Cooper
But she ripped away. She remained silent as she made her way toward the exit, rubbing her hand the whole way. Had she felt my spark? Our connection?
Or was it all in my head? I didn’t know. But I had an idea on how to get out of my prison and how to reach Amara. It might be suicide.
But I believed she was worth it.
5: Amara
Cathal was playing games with me. He had to be.
No angel dared show compassion or understanding to a demon. If he thought I’d let him out of the cage because he said a few nice things, pretending he cared, he had another thing coming.
I was more disturbed by my actions. I hadn’t asked him a single question about heaven or their plans. My whip had stayed coiled and hidden away the entire time. The urges I usually had to torture, to hurt, hadn’t been present. I, a chosen demon of the guard, had fought angels for an eternity.
And now I what, lost my nerve?
But to hit Cathal, that wasn’t my desire. I desired pleasure. My hands, for sure, craved his flesh. It was a connection that could never be. I was Lucifer’s daughter. I didn’t get any choices.
So I hid in my room like a spoiled little princess. I had a great view of the lake of fire flowing down from the waterfall, but that beauty was beyond me today. An elegant room, the biggest in the palace next to Lucifer’s own. I had the extravagant riches, more wealth than any demon needed, but inside I’m unsatisfied.
Hollow.
Not even pastries and lavish chocolate could bring comfort.
I sat at my vanity. It was gold lined with elegant swirls along the mirror. Delicate as it was, my eyes fell to the swords I kept lined up on the wall beside it. Each sword had been an angels’. A prize. A trophy.
Hundreds of them lined the perimeter of my room. All of their designs exactly the same as the one before, but one stood out. One was special.
I knew which one was Cathal’s because when I touched it, the hilt vibrated. It hummed a beautiful melody, a simple song. Gripping it tight with both hands, I closed my eyes. It stirred something in me. The hum awakened something in me I couldn’t even comprehend. I didn’t know what it was, but like a man grew hungry or thirsty, that’s what it did to me. I wanted to hold it.
Wanted to feel that pure essence. Why had none of the other swords been like this? Had Cathal left a piece of himself on this sword for me to find? I wanted to weep for this feeling that could never really be mine. I was just borrowing it for a little while.
The fog cleared in my mind and was filled with a woman’s scream. Tortured and blood curdling, I gasped myself and put the sword down. Where had that sound come for? Surely, that sound was commonplace in the underworld where human souls were tortured, but here it was anything but.
The golden French doors to my room opened and my servant, Magenta strolled in. An elegant servant, but one who wore robes free of scrolls and no headpiece to speak of. Her hair was tied back plainly and she hurried to my wardrobe. With an angular face and a little pinched nose, she was far from the prettiest demon in hell.
But she was like my mother and that meant I saw beauty where there was none.
“Come now, Amara, it’s time to get ready.” Magenta always spoke quickly, like she was under a deadline she couldn’t meet. Her eyes darting around nervously. That’s what working for Lucifer for over a thousand years did to a demon and Magenta lasted longer than most.
For my appearance in the high chamber? I sighed and sank deeper into my seat. “And if I don’t want to, Magenta? If I don’t want to take part in this wedding or agree to the games?”
She fluffed out my extravagant purple robe and laid it on my bed. Acres of fabric flowed to the ground in a puddle. The upper lapel was covered in golden scroll work. Magenta smoothed it out and stood back to study her handiwork. “You know as well as I do, there’s no refusing Lucifer. Not one that doesn’t end in the flame. Even talking like this…”
“You wouldn’t tattle on me, would you?”
Magenta gazed into my eyes and touched my chin as a mother would. Her face was kind, but she was still demon. She couldn’t be trusted absolutely. “I raised you, child. You might not be my blood, but I was there when you were born. I was the third ever to hold you. I would only protect you from Lucifer. Never, would I bring you harm. I thought you’d know that.”
Magenta’s eyes fell as if she were sad, but even that could be an act.
“Father’s made it so I can never trust or take anything at face value.” I rose from my vanity and went to inspect my robe. It was beautiful and the layers of thick fabrics were intricate in pattern and design. I stroked the front. The satin was smooth and soft. Most in the lower courts would kill for a robe like this and to me, it was a ball and chain.
If left to my devices, I would chuck all my gowns into the lake of fire and gleefully watch them burn to ash.
“What was she like? Mother?”
Magenta hurried back to the wardrobe and her hand flung across the garments. “Which headdress? The big black one might look best with that robe on such a grand day. Well, go on! Get dressed all ready, Amara!”
She turned stern when she needed to. I slipped my leather outfit off and into my robe in a matter of moments. “You may do my hair as you see fit, Magenta, but I won’t wear a headdress.” I sat on the edge of the bed and waited for her to do her handy work.
Sighing, with her hands on her hips, Magenta shook her head. “The small headdress then?”
There’d be no denying her, but to stand in the inner chamber in the official gear? It made everything feel so much more final. I longed to be back in the prison cell. Longed to be back with Cathal and away from what was sure to follow.
What was wrong with me?
****
The inner chamber was a circular room with red pillars between each window. With a giant dome for a ceiling, jewels crested it in a rainbow of colors. The floor was covered in a golden fire and in the center, a smaller fire raged from a stainless steel hole.
As I was ushered in by Magenta, each demon stood from their golden throne around the fire. Lucifer awaited me by the flame. He wore his best robe and the only one not wearing a headdress. Even I wore a small, muted lavender colored one which fanned at the back, resembling a bird’s tail.
There was no place for games in the inner chamber. I bowed as I stopped in front of Lucifer and the other demons bowed. Magenta stayed in a deep bow and wouldn’t stand upright again until spoken to. That was the way for a lowly servant.
Lucifer took my hand and kissed it before I was allowed to rise. Then he waved his hand to dismiss Magenta and never even uttered her name. She did an about-face, and with quick footsteps hurried from the room like she couldn’t wait to retreat.
I wished to follow.
He smiled. “My darling daughter, a big day awaits you. Each of member here at the council has appointed a champion to fight for your hand. If you’ll take your seat, we’ll hear who they’ve chosen.”
My seat? I couldn’t block the pounding sound of my heart as each of the demons sat at their throne. Lucifer took the one in the center, the biggest and most ornate. Beside him, a throne smaller in stature must’ve been mine.
But if I sat…
“Just because you sit, doesn’t make you a member of the inner chamber yet.” Lucifer smiled and it sent a race of cold up my spine. “You inherit the flame first and that won’t happen until you wed.”
The other demons murmured in agreement and that was the only reason I believed what he said. So I bowed my head and took my seat. It was more comfortable than I expected. Folding my hands in my lap, I waited with impatience as Candace rose. Her robe was only outdone by mine, and her silver headdress so intricate and heavy looking, I was surprised she could stand at all.
“Dear Amara, I have picked a champion worthy of your might. And one that almost rivals your beauty. The demon, Vasper, in all of his glory would be a worthy opponent.”
Vasper. I knew him and while everything
she’d said about him was true, I didn’t want to marry him. I didn’t want to marry anyone. He was known more as a thinker than a fighter—a scholar, but effective on the battlefield. Strong, yes, muscular, yes, but he could strategize like no other.
I nodded my head to be polite as the other demons clapped with excitement. Candace sat down again and held her head high. She was proud of her choice, that much was clear. Next, the demon seated to her right stood, Grayson. He cleared his throat before he spoke in a loud booming voice.
It was going to be a very long day.
****
By the end twelve demons were appointed, each stronger and more regal than the last. Except for the choice of a minotaur, the selection was uninspired, even the selection of Vasper. He’d make a good husband and was the most neutral of nominations, but didn’t raise my spirits. A cloud of depression hung above my head, growing larger as the day wore on.
I was tired, hungry, and bored. I flicked a piece of dirt under my fingernail out as Lucifer stood. He buttoned the top of his robe as he leaned in and whispered. “You could pretend to be interested in all this, at least.”
Speech escaped me as he took center court. Holding his arms out straight, he spread his wings to the full breadth of the room. All the demons stood to attention and I followed suit, but I kept my head bowed down low while the others were permitted to look at him.
It had always been that way. I wasn’t an equal. The fact he wanted me to be an equal, should’ve delighted me, but instead, it filled me only with horror.
I was out of choices.
“My pick for my darling daughter is Markus. A fierce hunter and a cunning thinker, he would be her perfect match. An old friend of mine, I can trust him with my most precious gift. The gift of Amara’s beauty isn’t one I give away lightly.”
Markus.
Could there be a worst choice? Not only was he Lucifer’s oldest ally, but he was also loyal. Everything anyone ever did or said was committed to Markus’s memory. Any sleight of hand would be reported back to Lucifer. He might as well have married me to a warden because the effect would be the same.
Fire raged against my cheeks as the demons ushered out of the chamber single file, but I lingered and walked over to one of the windows. I stretched my wings out and gazed down at my rose.
The gift from my mother before her death.
My eyebrows furrowed, the state of it was worse than just a night ago. One of the petals lay withered on the rock below. Dried out and dead.
“Something on your mind?” Lucifer must have circled back. He stood behind me now and stroked his long fingers through the tips of my black wings.
I shook my head. He didn’t want to hear what I had to say.
“Come now, you behaved so well during court, you’ve earned a say.” Lucifer smiled as I turned around. “Haven’t I always been a giving father to you?”
No, a thousand times no, but I wouldn’t dare say such a thing. “Of course, Father. I just…” I swallowed hard as my pulse raced. “Are the games…If you wanted me to marry Markus why the games? You could’ve just picked him.”
“True, but where would be the fun in that?” Lucifer clapped his hands together once. “I’m betting he’ll win. I’m willing to bet my life on it.”
I struggled to take a deep breath. “Are you fixing the games? Are you giving him an advantage the others won’t have?”
Lucifer snarled and grew even taller. I cowered away for pushing him too far. Asking too many questions. He leaned into my face and glowered with his eyes spinning red. Quick to anger, I always had a knack for pushing his buttons.
“How I run my arena is my business, not yours. If Markus is given an advantage, it will be just that. An advantage. Demons have too much respect to win a fixed fight, Amara. I’m surprised you would even suggest that. Maybe that angel is playing with your mind.”
“I’m sorry, Father.” My lip trembled and my hands shook. I tried to hide it, but Lucifer always knew, didn’t he? He always seemed to know everything.
He stroked my hair back. “You get anything out of him yet?”
“Nothing yet, Father.” There was a slight tremble in my voice.
“Then go to him. Play. Enjoy your next few days of freedom as a champion of my guard. Soon, you’ll get the privilege to join me here. Any demon would kill to be at my side the way you will be. Try to remember that, Amara.”
Lucifer headed out of the inner chamber and I was so relieved, so glad. I leaned my head back against the window. My body relaxed, finally free of him, but soon there’d be no reprieve.
The doors opened again and they echoed throughout the room. Magenta entered with quick feet clicking across the floor. “Amara, come! Time to take off that robe and headdress. I must get them cleaned before tomorrow night!”
“Tomorrow night?”
“When the champions are celebrated before the games start, child!” Magenta rolled her eyes suggesting I was a forgetful annoyance. “A parade and dinner in their honor. You’ll be expected to meet and mingle with them all, of course.”
Great, just what I wanted to hear. “Quickly. I must change. There’s someone I have to see.”
Someone? Some angel, and the longer I was away from him, the more my heart wanted to see him again desperately. It was twisted and wrong, but it was also the truth. Soon the bounds of hell wouldn’t just be Lucifer’s—they’d also be mine.
And my heart begged to be free.
6: Cathal
I thought on Amara every moment since she left my cell. Meditation brought me a sense of clarity even if it didn’t bring me guidance from heaven. What I needed to do was clear, but I didn’t know if I had the strength to do it.
To win. For her, I’d try.
In the time she was gone, I had figured out a plan. Something that wouldn’t scare her away. A push in the wrong direction, could send her spiraling out of control.
She was, after all, demon and quick to anger; my words had to be chosen carefully.
When the door to the dungeon opened, I was surprised to see Sebastian again. The demon guard grunted as he put down a tray and slid it over. Taken back, I blinked my eyes hurriedly at the cup of clear water and a buttered piece of bread. With a steady hand, I picked it up.
My finger sank into the warmed butter and I licked it off my finger. Glancing up at Sebastian, he shrugged. “It’s unheard of. New record. However, you’ve managed it, you deserve an award.”
He shuffled away and I thought I might be well on my way to earning the best reward I could think of. Redemption of a demon in the eyes of heaven? If that was possible, wouldn’t that mean anyone could be redeemed? I couldn’t get ahead of myself. How arrogant to think I could redeem a demon when it had never be done?
I needed to repent and focus myself. The task at hand, wouldn’t come easy. Arrogance and pride would only put me at a disadvantage.
I practically swallowed the bread whole. It was delicious, soft and moist with a balance of salt—one of the few things angels could really taste. I could survive an eon without food, but the taste of it was pleasant and as far as olive branches went, it was a good one.
I entered my meditation state again and the food helped center me. Behind me, I flapped my wings, but the broken tips still hurt. Grunting under the strain, quickened my breath as my wings flapped.
Time for them to get stronger. Time for me to get ready. I was heading into the battle of the century for a demon who might have a soul. I was going on faith that she did because what Amara stirred in me couldn’t be by accident.
Only time would tell if she felt the same. I almost hoped she didn’t because she and I were too different. When this was over, if I managed to save her, we’d part ways. But if she felt half of what I did, walking away might not be possible. And that’d break every rule there was.
****
Amara still hadn’t made an appearance. Beginning to worry, I paced the length of my cell. When the door opened, my heart leaped into my thr
oat to see the top of her purple streaked hair again. There was something different about her this time than there had been before.
More makeup on her cheeks and purple-tinged lips. Even though she didn’t need it to look beautiful, it enhanced her. She was almost irresistible—if only a cell didn’t keep us separated.
“Thank you for the bread. I was beginning to think you might never return.”
A breathy laugh escaped her lips. “I almost didn’t. I got held up forever in the inner chamber. Lucifer is long winded, on the best of days. He sent me here.”
My wings bristled at the news. What could that mean? “Oh?”
She stepped right up to the bars and gripped them. Amara’s voice was quieter than it had ever been. “He sent me here to play with you. Get information about heaven. Your plans. I only have a few days to do it. I should order the watchman to ready a torture room for us. He should be getting it ready right now.”
“Should? Why haven’t you? I’m in no rush to be tortured, believe me, but I do expect it.”
“The gladiator champions have been picked by the thirteen members of the inner chamber.” When she glanced up, heartbreak lined her eyes. “It is the fourteenth gladiator I most fear. Markus, my father’s closest ally and friend. He’s a snitch. If married to him, I’ll never have an independent thought or feeling again.”
“Maybe he won’t win.”
Her voice was heartbreak. “He’ll win. Lucifer will make sure of it. That’s what he wants for me. To control me as he always has. I’ve never really had a choice.” A tear glistened in her eye, but she turned her head to blink it away so that I wouldn’t see.
A demon like Amara couldn’t show weakness, but vulnerability wasn’t weakness. I knew that, even if she didn’t.
I felt bad for her. My heart held sympathy for Amara, the demon, even if we had battled.
“I’m his. I always have been. I’ve been a fool to pretend for this long. A warrior? A champion for him? None of it really mattered.”
