The Most Eligible Bachelor: A Texas Love Story

by Bella Winters

  “He what?” she shrieks. “Are you freaking kidding me? What an asshole. He has no right. He hasn’t been to any of the doctor’s appointments, he hasn’t even bothered to see you, what the hell gives him any right to do anything?” She bangs her fists down on the table in frustration. “He’s probably been out there doing God knows what with God knows who and you’ve been pregnant with his baby the entire time. I’m about to kick some ass.”

  “He was drunk as well. I don’t know if he’s drunk from last night or drunk from this morning.” I shake my head, disappointed in what happened to Ben. Although maybe this didn’t happen, maybe he was always like this and I just didn’t see it. “But yeah, he’s a mess.”

  Jenny smiles at me, but I can see the strain behind her expression. She’s mad, but she’s trying to hide it. “Yeah well it’s just a good job that he isn’t in your life anymore.... do you have work this morning?”

  “Urgh, yeah.” I don’t mind my new job at the moment, I’m quite happy temping in an office, spending most of my time photocopying, it isn’t taxing and the people there are pleasant enough, but I’m constantly worried about the dwindling bundle of money that Mom and Dad gave me. I still have plenty, but I’m sure it won’t be plenty once the babies come. The job doesn’t pay enough. Plus, admittedly, I am a bit of a freak there with my absolutely massive swollen belly. Turns out a twin pregnancy is much bigger than a normal one. “I’m just on my way out now actually. Do you have anywhere to be today?”

  She leans in and stage whispers to me. “I’m dancing in another video today. No names, but it’s that of a famous rapper.”

  I love that Jenny is getting far with her career, she deserves it. I’m not surprised, she’s feisty and fiery and a go getter. She’s good at dancing too, much better than I thought she was which is actually not that surprising. Trust my best friend to have some secret amazing talent.

  “That’s awesome. I can’t wait to see it.”

  “Come on, we’ll walk to the subway together... oh hang on, I just need to grab my bag, wait a minute...”

  As she leaves the room, I hear my cell phone bleep out and a message plasters across the screen. The phone number is Ben’s so my eyes immediately roll up into the back of my skull, just to stop me from crying. I don’t want to hear from him, I don’t ever want to speak to him again. Doesn’t he get that? Didn’t I make that very clear?

  ‘Serena, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean too...’

  That’s it, nothing more. Half a badly written message is all I deserve. Makes sense, I suppose that’s a bit like what our relationship was like. Half hearted, slightly uncaring, doomed to failure. Now I just need to get through the next few months without speaking to him again. I don’t need to concentrate on him anyway, I’ve got two up and coming babies to think about...

  ***

  ‘Serena, please don’t keep ignoring me...’

  I don’t even bother to read this one. The last two and a half months has been full of these messages. One he even pretended was from his Mom, it was tragic. I just don’t want anything to do with him anymore, and no amount of endless messages is going to change that. I gave him his chance and he screwed it up. I don’t want him messing up our babies like he has me. I have to be strong enough for the both of them.

  “Him again?” Jenny asks with concern in her eyes. “Are you just going to keep on ignoring him forever more?”

  “What are you on about, Jenny? You were the one ready to kick his ass not that long ago.” I can’t believe she actually looks like she might not be on my side for once. “I can’t think about it now. I have this heaving bump to worry about. I don’t care about him, just like he’s never cared about me.”

  A guilty expression crosses Jenny’s face and I can tell that something has happened. I don’t know if I want to know what really, but at the same time I’m desperate to. I shove my hands onto my hips the best that I can and I glare at her until she finally reveals all.

  “I ran into Tia today...”

  “Tia? My old roommate? The girl that you fell out with over a guy?” I can’t believe it, this is insane. I thought they despised one another, it’s one of the reasons that I don’t see Tia much anymore myself. “What the hell?”

  “Well, Mike is back in her life. Or at least, he’s trying to be. So we got together to hatch up a revenge plot. It was good for me to go back anyway, I haven’t seen the guys from CeeLow’s for a while.”

  I’m stunned, almost into silence. “What do you mean? What happened?”

  “Well, after we hatched our revenge plan – which I’ll totally tell you about later because it’s brilliant – you came up. Ben too. She sees him a lot because he comes into the club...”

  “Drinking and sleeping with women, no doubt.”

  “No. None of that actually, he comes into the club to talk to her because he’s lonely. He misses you like crazy and he wants to change. Apparently he really is sorry and he does want to be involved with the babies lives. It seems like he really is a different person.... and I know Tia wouldn’t say all of that if she didn’t mean it.”

  I clutch onto my stomach as a wave of pain hits me. It’s shock, I know it is, I cannot for the life of me believe what I’m hearing. “I don’t need this now, Jenny. In case you haven’t noticed I’m about to have my babies. I don’t want to even think about him. I don’t care how sorry he is or whatever. It’s come much too late.”

  Jenny moves over to me and she rubs my back in a reassuring gesture. “I know you don’t need this, Serena, but I think it’s best that you hear what’s going on, don’t you?”

  I breathe deeply, a hotness radiates right through my body at a million miles an hour. My head is dizzy, I feel sick, it’s as if I’m going into real life shock. “I don’t... I don’t know...”

  “Serena?” Her voice sounds different now, I almost can’t hear her. “Serena? Are you okay?”

  “Hurts...” I splutter out. “It hurts.”

  “Are you in labour? Are these contractions?” She’s panicking now, I can hear it, but that feels distant from me. I’m trapped in the bubble where it’s just me and my brain. “What do I do? Shall I call a doctor? Do we need to get to the hospital? What do we do? What does it say in your baby book?”

  As she moves from me to try and figure out what she’s going to do I collapse onto the couch in agony. This isn’t supposed to be happening yet, I still have a couple of weeks. I wanted to work right up until the very end for the money, but now it seems that the end has come already.

  I’m about to be a Mom. I’m about to really have these babies... all by myself.

  “Oh my God.” I feel a popping sensation and then a weirdly warm water drips down my legs. This is too quick. I don’t know much about giving birth because I haven’t done it before but I know my waters shouldn’t have broken already. This is wrong, I need to be in a hospital quickly before I get some sort of infection. “Jenny, I need to go. We need to get to the hospital right now.”

  She tucks her hands under my armpits and pulls me into a standing position. It’s hard because my body is resistant, but eventually we manage it. She gets me standing and calls a cab, all the while my body and my mind is a hot mess. I ache everywhere, bolts of agony shoot right through me, my mind is full of confusing thoughts.

  The main one I think is I cannot do this alone.

  “Jenny, I need him,” I tell her weakly. “I need him.”

  “Him?” She guides me towards the door. “Him who?”

  “Ben.” I know it’s wrong, but I can’t help myself. I want him by my side, I don’t want to be the one to blame for him missing the birth of his twins. If he doesn’t come, that’s his own choice. But it cannot be my fault. “I know what I said before, but I think he needs to be here.”

  “Let’s get you into the cab first, then I’ll call.”

  Things move in a blur, I don’t even know what’s happening. I sort of remember climbing into a cab, and I vaguely remember listening to Jenny on
the call to Ben, but I don’t recall anything that was said, and I also remember arriving at the hospital but I don’t recall coming into a room or putting on a hospital gown.

  “Did you dress me, Jenny?” I ask once the contractions stop for just a moment. “I didn’t put this on, did I?”

  “I helped,” she admits. “But I didn’t do it. To be honest after witnessing this I don’t want to do any of it. You’ve really put me off having children ever. I don’t think I’ll have sex ever again.”

  “Yeah, me neither.” My fingers grip to the edge of the bed as I rock back and forth on my feet. They keep telling me to get into the bed but I know that I can’t. The agony is too damn much. “Fucking hell, this hurts...”

  “I’m sorry.” Holy fuck, is that Ben’s chocolaty voice? I spin to look at him with wide, shocked eyes. “That’s my fault.”

  Jenny waits for a moment, flickering her eyes between us two, then she stands up to make a move. “I think I’ll leave you two alone. I’m sure you have a lot to talk about.”

  Yeah, about seven months worth of stuff, but I honestly don’t think any of that will come out now. I can’t even think straight, never mind speak. This pain... it might just freaking kill me. And if it does, the first thing I’ll do is murder Ben for doing this to me.

  What an asshole.

  “Can I come in?” he asks sheepishly. “Is it okay for me to be here?”

  “Argh,” I grown in sheer agony. “Yes, it’s fine, whatever. Just get over here and rub my back already. I need you.”

  Chapter Twenty Five – Ben

  She needs me, that’s all I’ve wanted to hear ever since I first started getting my act together. She needs me. Serena is letting me in at the most crucial part of our babies lives. That has to mean something, even if it isn’t forgiveness.

  “What do you need?” I ask, all business. “Whatever you need, I’m here for you.”

  “I don’t know,” she whimpers while leaning over the bed. “I don’t know it just hurts all over. Like, literally everywhere. I’ve never felt anything like it before.”

  “Okay, okay. Do you need a nurse?” I can already feel myself starting to panic. I promised myself that I wouldn’t, but already I’m a fucking mess. “What do we need?”

  She grips onto my hands so tight that I fear she might crack my fingers in half and she screams. The sounds rips from her very soul and shreds the room to pieces. It’s absolutely terrifying. “I don’t know, I just need you to help me.”

  As she collapses into my arms, all weak and covered in sweat, I feel like I’m exactly where I’m meant to be. This is where I should have been all along, with Serena, helping her through this. I can’t believe I allowed my fear of my business failing, despite the fact that it’s really far away from that, allow me to push the most important person in my life away from me. I’m an idiot, I deserve to lose it all. I’m just glad it hasn’t worked out like this. If Serena gives me another try right now I’m going to throw my heart and soul into it and never fuck up again.

  “I’m really sorry, Serena,” I say in a rush of emotion. “I know I’ve been a bad person, and I know that I’ve never deserved you, and honestly...”

  “Shut up, Ben,” she snaps back through gritted teeth. “Now really isn’t the time.”

  She’s right, I know she’s right. How could I ever think about bringing this up right now? What an idiot. I’ve just told myself that I wouldn’t screw up again and right off the bat I have.

  “Sorry, Serena, honestly I don’t know...”

  “Stop saying sorry. Go and get a nurse. I definitely need a nurse now. Or a doctor, or someone.”

  Practical help, now that’s something I can definitely do. “Right, yes, I’ll go right now.”

  I push open the door and tear off down the hallway at a million miles an hour. I think I might even rush past Jenny at some point but I’m not sure because I’m not really looking. My heart thunders painfully in my chest, I can hear it beating in my ears, and there’s a tight knot of anxiety that’s bundled up in my stomach. A cold snake glides through my organs, making me shiver sporadically every so often.

  Thank God I’ve sorted myself out for this moment, thank goodness Mom told me the truth about Dad and she made me see sense about the way that my life was going. Serena and the twins deserve so much more than the person I was before. I’m just so glad that I’m not a mess anymore. Not the drunken, sodden idiot that I was not so long ago.

  “Nurse!” I cry out as soon as I spot someone. “I need help. My...” I can’t say girlfriend, she isn’t really any girlfriend of mine at the moment. “The mother of my children is struggling. We need help.”

  The nurse nods and agrees to come with me, and while I wait a moment for her to finish what she’s doing, I pull out my cell phone and I fire off a text to my mom. After all the hell that she’s put herself through in the last few months just to get me back on track, she deserves to know that I’m at the hospital and that my babies are being born. Finally I might have something to make her proud of me.

  ‘Mom, Serena finally called me back, she’s in labour, I’m at the hospital now. I’ll send you a picture once they are born.’

  Then I glance upwards and I smile at the universe. It’s time, I’m finally about to become a father. I didn’t even know this was a dream of mine, but now that it’s about to come true I’m so damn excited...

  ***

  “I cannot believe these babies belong to us,” I say again to Serena as another burst of intense love washes over me. It’s a boundless, endless love that I didn’t know I was even capable of. “These babies. We made them.”

  “I made them,” Serena says with a giggle. “You didn’t really do anything to be honest.”

  “Yeah, I guess you’re right about that one.” I glance over to her and smile brightly as I drink her blissful, peaceful face in. She’s been through a very hard labour, it was longer and more difficult on her body than I ever thought it could be, but she was extremely brave throughout. I am so proud of her. “I didn’t do anything, but I’m so grateful to you for everything that you’ve done.”

  I want to reach down and hold her hand, but I have my baby boy in my arms, and Serena has hold of our brand new baby girl. Oddly enough, right now, my daughter looks like me and my son looks like Serena. It’s lovely, they’re an adorable mix of both of us.

  “I’m glad that you’re here now,” she replies thickly. “I know it hasn’t been an easy few months but I’m glad you’ve come.”

  “Oh my God, I’m so grateful that you’ve called. After everything I did I didn’t deserve that phone call, but I’m glad...”

  “Is it true that you’ve been cleaning yourself up? And that you’ve spoken to Tia about it?”

  My heart sinks, my hanging out with Tia just to get a little bit of closeness to Serena, despite the fact that the girls don’t really hang out anymore, is supposed to be a secret. I told her not to tell anyone that she was sort of my therapist for a while, but it seems that nothing can be sacred.

  “Oh right, yeah. I suppose so. I just...” I shrug. “I don’t know, it hasn’t been easy without you.”

  She gives me a smile and glances at the gorgeous bundle of joy in my arms. “So, what are we going to call them? We need to have names?”

  “Have you not spent the last few months thinking of names? I assumed you’d already have something picked out.” After everything that I’ve done, I know I don’t have any rights to get to name the babies. I’d like to, but it doesn’t mean I get to.

  “No. I never found out what I was having.” Serena snuggles her nose against my little girl. “I wanted it to be a surprise. I guess I never thought I would be having one of each.”

  “So what do you like?”

  “Brandon,” she suggests. “Do you like that?”

  I glance down at my boy and immediately see that the name fits. “I love it,” I tell her. “It suits him so much. Brandon. Awesome.” I look over at my daughter. “And
what about Rose, for her?”

  As Serena’s face breaks into a smile I can see that I’ve hit the nail on the head. She loves Rose for our little girl just as much as I do. Brandon and Rose, our little twins, the future of me and Serena.

  “So... erm, what are you going to do now? I don’t know if I have much right to ask, but I do need to know all the same. “Like, when you get out the hospital, I mean? Do you have somewhere to live?”

  “I do...” She nods slowly. “But it’s with Jenny. I don’t know how keen she is to have two babies living with us to be honest. She hasn’t said anything, but I don’t think I’d much like it if I were her. Now that she’s a dancer, she’s out all hours too, so it probably won’t work... maybe I should have thought about this before the birth, huh?”

  My heart soars, I feel my spirits lift high. I know I’m about to overstep the boundary before I even say it but I can’t speak. Somehow, I can’t seem to stop myself. “You know you could still move in with me?” The words sound strained, Serena is bound to hear the pressure that I’m putting on myself. “You’re room is still there, exactly as you left it. There’s plenty of room for the twins...”

  “But I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?” Serena cocks her head at me. “It didn’t exactly work out last time, did it?”

  “No it didn’t, but that’s because of me. I was an idiot, I was foolish, I got scared about us being too close to one another too quickly... I freaked and I push people away, that’s what I do. It’s what I’ve always done.” My heart melts and my tone softens as I look at Serena. “The only difference is you’re the only person I miss. You’re the only person that I think about every single day.”

  “You do?”

  “I’ve texted you, every single day, haven’t I? I’ve proved to you that I’ve been thinking about you, haven’t I? I know that I’ve been foolish, I know I’ve acted badly, but I won’t anymore. You just have to give me a chance. To be with you, to be a father, to prove that I’m worthy?”

  She pauses for a moment and thinks it through, I can almost see the cogs ticking in her brain. I bite down on my lip as I try my hardest to keep my persuasive words inside. All I want to do is outpour all my feelings to her but I know after everything she’s just been through that will overwhelm her. I need to just keep my feelings inside and let her work it out for herself. It might kill me, but I have to do it. I just need to keep reminding me that it’s the right thing to do.