No Safe Place

by Mary Head

  Hannah didn’t respond, trying to keep her tears from rising in her eyes, trying to keep from letting his words affect her. She had to keep thinking her dad was going to find her. To think otherwise was to give up, and she wasn’t going to do that.

  “Do you want to die?” Eddie asked, sounding genuinely curious.

  “No,” Hannah whispered, suddenly aware that she was trembling.

  “Good.”

  He released her wrist, shifting as though to move off of her, and she took her chance.

  She brought her knee up, aiming between his legs, and though she made contact, it wasn’t with nearly as much force as she would’ve liked. She used her foot to push him away from her, and he fell to the side, grimacing as one hand flew between his legs, the other bracing against the floor. Hannah watched him warily, heart hammering in her chest as she pulled her legs up, trying to shift back.

  A tense moment passed, and then he came at her, pinning her to the mattress once again, his body pressing along the length of hers.

  “No!” she protested, fear robbing her voice of its strength and making the word come out in a strangled whimper.

  Abruptly, she remembered how she had injured his shoulder the other day, and from the way he had winced when she was struggling a few moments ago, it was clear that it was still hurting him. Her free hand curled into a fist and she punched him in the shoulder, trying to use all of her strength, though she admittedly didn’t have much left.

  It was enough, though. He recoiled from her, his face twisted in pain as he gave an inarticulate yell of pain and rage.

  “God damn it, you little bitch!” he shouted, leaning over her again and slapping her hard across the face with his right hand. She couldn’t stop the cry of pain that slipped from her as her head snapped to the side, and tears rose in her eyes once more. Her hand pressed on his chest, trying to push him away, and he grabbed her wrist, making her cry out again as he slammed it against the mattress.

  “It’s time someone taught you a lesson,” he said in a low voice, grunting slightly from exertion, his breath hot on her face.

  “Get off of me!” she shrieked desperately, turning her face away again as she squirmed beneath him. She worked her leg out from under him, thinking she could knee him again or maybe somehow kick him, but he moved his leg, bringing his knee down on the inside of her thigh and holding it in place.

  Shifting his body, his free hand came to rest on her hip, lingering a moment before sliding to the front of her jeans.

  “Saw one of your posters earlier,” he whispered. “Little Miss Perfect has a tattoo in a very surprising place.” His hand pressed against her, and a choked sob slipped from her as she tried to bring her thighs together. “Is it here? Guess I’ll find out soon.”

  “Don’t touch me!” she shouted, her words clipped as her sobs hitched in her chest.

  He ignored her, his fingers slipping under her shirt, his palm rough against her skin as his hand moved slowly upward.

  “Stop,” she begged, fresh tears springing to her eyes as she pressed her back into the mattress, trying to pull away. “Pl – please stop.”

  The odor of cigarettes was strong, on his breath and on his clothes, and her stomach turned uncomfortably. She had always hated the smell of cigarette smoke, and after this, it would be unbearable.

  Suddenly, she wondered where Jackie was. He had been acting as a buffer between her and Eddie, keeping his brother from doing something worse to her than he already had, but it was obvious he wasn’t here now. She wondered if he had given up on her, if he had suddenly shifted to Eddie’s way of thinking and no longer cared about what happened to her.

  Hopelessness washed over her. This was it, the moment where he followed through on his threat and finally broke her, just as he had promised. She had said she would fight him, and so far she had tried, but she honestly didn’t know if she could anymore. She was exhausted, weak, and in pain, not to mention handcuffed with nowhere to go.

  Eddie’s fingertips brushed against her bra, and she gasped sharply as she recoiled from him, once again pushing against the mattress as she tried to shift away. His hand moved up, over her breast, and he squeezed, groping her roughly.

  Another whimpered protest passed her lips, and a vague dumb thought crossed her mind that she was grateful she was wearing one of her plain white bras, and not a patterned one, or one with lace, because what might that do to him?

  His hips pushed against hers, and she felt something that forced a disgusted groan from her, something she hoped wasn’t what she thought it was.

  Don’t struggle. The voice in her head sounded a lot like her dad’s. Don’t fight. That’s what he wants; it’ll just turn him on more. He wants your power. Don’t give it to him.

  The hand on her breast finally, mercifully, moved down to press against her ribs, his fingers digging roughly into her skin as he held her in place.

  “Where’s your fight now?” he said softly, his face close to hers. “Hmm?” His hand pressed harder, making her wince, and then he added thoughtfully, “Might not even need the drugs.”

  His fingers flexed around her wrist as his eyes flicked upward, away from her face, and she knew he was looking at the handcuffs.

  Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to ignore the sounds of the storm outside, the way she was trembling, the pain she could feel all over her body, the tears in her eyes as she glared up at him. All she focused on was her father’s voice in her head, telling her to be strong, to not give up, not all fighting has to be physical, Hannah, remember that, and drew in another deep breath through her nose before saying something she couldn’t recall having ever said to anybody in her life.

  “Fuck you.”

  Eddie’s eyebrows shot up, and he stared at her for a moment before the corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk. He moved against her again, his knee pressing harder into her thigh as his hand tightened around her wrist.

  “Interesting choice of words,” he murmured, the hand on her torso pressing against her ribs and making her wince again.

  There was a heavy silence, and she could almost see the wheels in his mind turning, mulling over the situation. His eyes narrowed, his hand shifting on her body, and her fear spiked, a tight feeling growing in her chest and making it hard to breathe.

  Chapter 45

  Jackie stepped inside the house, breathless from his sprint up the driveway to the house after he’d pulled in and seen Eddie’s van outside.

  “Eddie?” he called, panic making it even harder to breathe. He couldn’t detect any signs of his brother anywhere else in the house, and he hurried towards the basement door, finding it unlocked. He pushed it open, and saw Eddie standing by the workbench, hands braced on the edge and his back to Hannah, who was shifting, pulling her legs in to her body as she tried to sit up. Though Jackie couldn’t see her face, he could see that her shirt was pushed up a little, exposing the skin of her stomach.

  A frown creased his brow, and he glanced uneasily at Eddie before his gaze shifted to the workbench. He could see the vial of drugs sitting there, the needle right beside, and his frown deepened as he looked back to his brother.

  “Eddie?”

  Eddie’s gaze flicked to Jackie, and then he moved abruptly, snatching up the vial and needle before striding up the stairs, pushing past Jackie out of the basement.

  Jackie looked back at Hannah, watching her for a moment before he turned to follow Eddie.

  “What’re you doing home?” he asked when he found him in his bedroom.

  “Forgot a work order,” Eddie muttered, waving a sheet of paper before pushing past Jackie again.

  “Then what were you doing down there?” Jackie pressed, trailing behind Eddie as he walked down the hall towards the living room.

  Eddie didn’t respond, and Jackie’s uneasiness increased. He had only left the house because Eddie had gone to work and they needed food. Hannah had been asleep when he left and he thought she would be okay; he hadn’t counted on E
ddie coming back, and the very thing Jackie had been trying to prevent, Eddie being home alone with Hannah, had happened.

  “Eddie, what –”

  Eddie whirled on him, his expression annoyed. “Just shut up, Jackie, okay?”

  They glared at each other a moment, and then Eddie sighed.

  “I have to get to work.”

  Jackie watched him leave, waiting for the sound of the van pulling away from the house, and then went to his truck to bring in the groceries.

  A short while later he was descending into the basement, a plate in one hand and a cup of water in the other.

  Hannah was leaning against the heater with her legs folded underneath her, her left arm resting on her leg, the handcuff around her wrist pushed as far up on her arm as she could get it. Her wrist seemed more bruised, and he thought it even looked a little swollen. She had glanced fearfully at the door when he stepped inside, but her gaze fell when she saw it was him, and she was now staring at her lap.

  Jackie walked over to her and carefully lowered himself to the floor, sitting cross-legged and setting down the cup and plate.

  “It’s turkey,” he said, pointing at the sandwich, his eyes flicking to her face.

  She didn’t move, didn’t even look up, and he stared at her for a moment.

  “Are – are you okay?” he finally asked quietly, tilting his head a little to see her face better. The strap of her tank top had broken again and was hanging limply over her chest with the safety pin still attached to the end, but something kept him from asking to fix it.

  A humorless smile curved her lips as she shook her head.

  “No.” She raised her gaze to his face, staring intently into his eyes, and he saw the bruise on her cheek was darker too. “I want to go home. I haven’t had a shower or a decent meal in days. I hurt all over; I can barely move. I miss – I miss my dad,” she said, her lip quivering as her eyes shone brightly, “and I miss my friends.” She shook her head again, tears rolling down her cheeks when she blinked. “I just want to go home.”

  Jackie tried to smile encouragingly at her. “You will soon. Eddie said we wouldn’t keep you very long, that we’d let you go after a few days.”

  A jagged, unnatural sounding laugh slipped past Hannah’s lips, not at all like what he had heard the night before, and she raised her eyebrows as she stared at Jackie.

  “Is that the lie he told you to get you to go along with this? That he was going to just let me go?”

  Jackie frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

  “You’re so naïve,” Hannah muttered, rolling her eyes towards the ceiling. “It’d be cute if it wasn’t so pathetic.”

  Jackie’s frown deepened, confusion spreading within him.

  “After all of this,” she continued, rattling the handcuff and gesturing to the bruise on her cheek and the others on her arms, “you still think he’s just going to let me go? Now that I’ve seen your faces, and know your names, you think he’s just gonna take me home and drop me at the curb?” She paused, her eyes searching his as her eyebrows knitted together. “He’s going to kill me, Jackie,” she said quietly. “That’s how this is going to end.”

  “What?” Jackie gave a tiny shake his head, his expression skeptical. “No, I know he’s not – but he wouldn’t –”

  “He told me he was. Payback,” she said a little breathlessly, her voice catching in her throat, “for whatever my dad was supposed to have done. It’s been his plan all along.”

  “No,” Jackie said again, a sinking feeling in his stomach as he stared at Hannah, watching the tears sliding down her cheeks. He shook his head again. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Yes, I do,” Hannah said firmly. “He told me, he told my dad –”

  “Shut up!” Jackie shouted, rising quickly to his feet. Hannah shrank back, her eyes flicking to his hands, clenched into fists at his sides.

  “Just – just shut up! You don’t know –” He broke off, his chest heaving as he stared down at her for a moment, not sure what he wanted to say or do. Then he abruptly turned away, stalking up the stairs and out of the basement, slamming the door behind him.

  Hannah flinched and closed her eyes, raising her trembling right hand to her face as she inhaled sharply.

  Now that she was truly alone, she couldn’t restrain her tears, and she sobbed for several minutes, every hard, gasping breath making her throat burn and her chest ache. Her ribs hurt now too, and she could almost still feel Eddie’s hand pressing hard against them.

  Acid bubbled up in her throat as she thought of his hand on her breast, remembered his hips pressing against hers and feeling what she was almost positive was the beginning of an erection, and she gagged, suddenly afraid that she might actually throw up. Her eyes flew open and she reached for the cup of water Jackie had left, taking a deep gulp. Her hand was shaking so badly that some of it spilled onto her chest and shirt, but she didn’t care.

  The water calmed her, and she took a deep breath, closing her eyes again. She didn’t want to think about Eddie, didn’t want to focus on how dirty and violated she felt, and she cast around for something else to think about.

  Her dad came to mind, and she felt her tears beginning to rise again as she thought of how much she missed him, and how badly she wished he were here.

  Stay strong, baby, his voice said in her head. It’s almost over.

  Her eyes fluttered open and she stared blankly at the expanse of concrete floor in front of her.

  It was almost over. Either her dad would find her, or Eddie would kill her. These were the only two options left for her, and she couldn’t see any other solution.

  She leaned forward to set the cup of water on the floor, and as she sat back, she heard the handcuffs rattle against the heater. Her gaze flicked to her arm, where she had shoved the cuff up as high as it would go to keep it from brushing against her bruised and swollen wrist.

  It hurt to flex her fingers, but she did it anyway, drawing them together experimentally, seeing how small she could make her hand, wondering if she could actually slip it through the handcuff.

  The idea was probably really stupid, but she hadn’t had a chance to try since the first time she’d woken up with the handcuffs on, and what else could she do? It was better to try and fail than to not try at all.

  Taking a deep breath, she moved the cuff back down her arm, wincing as it bumped her wrist, and simultaneously tried to pull her left hand out as she pushed against the cuff with her right one.

  The pain in her wrist was excruciating, and she grit her teeth to keep from screaming as she pushed the cuff again, twisting it and contorting her hand any way she could think of.

  Finally, with sweat on her forehead and tears on her cheeks, she gave up, taking a shuddering breath as she slumped against the heater and pushed the cuff back up her arm.

  Hopelessness settled within her once more, and she sniffled as she whispered, “Find me, Daddy. Please find me.”

  Chapter 46

  Up in the living room, Jackie sat restlessly on the couch, staring hard at the TV, though he had no idea what he was watching. He had stopped flipping channels several minutes ago and had irritably flung the remote aside.

  Hannah’s words kept looping in his mind like an awful broken record, and after a minute he pushed to his feet, stepping around the coffee table to pace the length of the living room. He didn’t want to believe her, didn’t want to think it could be in any way true, but he had seen the tears on her cheeks and the fear in her eyes, and heard the certainty in her voice.

  He’s going to kill me, Jackie.

  Everything that had happened since Wednesday night had made Jackie wonder just how well he knew his brother, but he still couldn’t see him as a murderer.

  There was doubt in his mind, though, tugging insistently at him, and he couldn’t shake it. He thought about coming home from the store earlier and opening the basement door, seeing Eddie down there and Hannah’s shirt pushed up, exp
osing that flash of skin. He didn’t think anything had really happened, but it still made him uneasy and made him wonder how close Eddie might be to crossing that line, and if he did, how far would he be from crossing others?

  Eddie had lied about so much already, saying they wouldn’t hurt her, that the drugs were only “just in case.” Maybe letting her go was a lie too.

  There was a painful tightening in Jackie’s chest, and he grimaced, running a hand through his hair as he turned towards the couch. He sat down heavily, blowing out his breath as he looked at the TV once more. After a second he reached for the remote and clicked it off before tossing it onto the coffee table.

  Silence descended, and a sudden feeling of exhaustion swept over him. He felt like he hadn’t really slept since this whole mess started, and the thought of stretching out on the couch was looking more appealing by the minute.

  He flashed back to the morning before and uneasiness sparked within him again. He had stayed with Hannah all night and remembered closing his eyes at one point, telling himself it was just for a minute, and then the next moment was startled awake by the sound of the basement door closing.

  It scared him badly to think that Eddie had been down there without him realizing and he had immediately checked on Hannah. She seemed undisturbed, though her blanket was gone and Jackie looked around for it, finally spotting it in the corner by the stairs. He had covered her up again, as it was still early and the basement was still quite cold, and then gone upstairs, finding Eddie in the kitchen.

  Neither of them had spoken as Eddie ate a quick breakfast, and then Eddie closed himself in his bedroom while Jackie settled on the couch.

  He worried about going to sleep now and something happening, but it was barely noon and Eddie shouldn’t be home for several more hours. A nap couldn’t hurt, and might clear his head and help him decide what he should do.

  His mind drifted to Hannah once more as he stretched out on the couch. He wondered if she was hungry, if she had eaten the sandwich he had brought down earlier, but he couldn’t bring himself to face her.