No Safe Place

by Mary Head

  Hannah looked at him a moment, biting her lower lip as she studied his face, and then finally nodded, pushing up onto her elbow and holding out her hand. He tipped the pills into her palm and reached for her cup of water, handing it to her so she could swallow the medicine.

  When she finished, she gave the cup back and lay down again, her expression still worried as she stared at him. He squeezed her hand and gave her an encouraging smile.

  “Close your eyes, baby. It’s okay.”

  “Sing, Daddy,” she whispered.

  A soft laugh slipped from him unbidden. He hadn’t sung to her in almost ten years, but if there was one thing he would never forget, it was her song.

  “Okay,” he said quietly as he nodded. “Go on and close your eyes.”

  She obeyed, her fingers tightening around his, and he gave them another squeeze as he cleared his throat and began to sing.

  “Blackbird” had been her song from the night she was born, the first song that had come to David’s mind when she had been fussy and Karen couldn’t get her to settle down. Throughout her childhood, he sang it for her whenever she wanted him to, until she outgrew the need for it, though he remembered singing it for her once when she was in high school, home alone while he was out of town. She had been scared of a thunderstorm and unable to sleep, and he sang to her over the phone, sitting in a slightly run down hotel room with files scattered all around him, and smiling as he thought of her curled up in bed with the phone pressed to her ear.

  The memory made him smile, and he reached over with his free hand to rub her back again, soothing her with his hand along with his voice.

  It wasn’t long before she was sound asleep, though he continued to sing a little while longer, his hand still drifting over her back, making sure she was really out before he stopped.

  A couple of minutes later, he sighed, his voice fading as he looked at her. She was curled up in bed again, but it didn’t make him smile this time.

  Bruises dotted the skin of her arms with darker circles around her wrists, though one wrist was now bound in a brace, and more bruises marred her face, including a dark spot on her left cheek from someone hitting her, possibly more than once.

  There was a cut on her heel, which explained the blood in the kitchen, though it was half healed and looked like it had been well taken care of, which he found curious.

  He didn’t dwell on that though. His mind was too busy worrying about the bruises he couldn’t see, other damage that might have been done to her that he was too scared to ask about.

  His greatest fear had been the possibility of finding her too late, finding not his Hannah but a cold, lifeless body. Underneath that fear, however, was his secondary concern that the bastard would rape her, violate her in the most horrible way he could imagine, break her until she no longer had any fight left in her.

  Part of him wanted to know for sure, but part of him was afraid of what the answer might be, and he couldn’t bring himself to ask. He knew it would come up, and probably soon, and if the answer was what he feared it to be, he would get her all the help he could, but he desperately hoped he was wrong. The recovery from that was never easy, and he couldn’t bear the thought of her having to go through it.

  Another sigh slipped from him, and he ran a hand over his mouth as he pushed to his feet, bending over her once more to press a kiss to her temple. He lingered a moment, stroking her hair and wishing so much that he didn’t have to leave, and then straightened suddenly, a thought occurring to him. He reached for his jacket and placed it carefully beside her on the bed, wanting her to have some reminder of him, to know he was with her, even when he wasn’t.

  He looked at her a moment longer, and then touched one final kiss to the side of her head before forcing himself to leave the room.

  Stepping out into the hallway, he carefully closed the door behind him, and then turned his attention to the two agents stationed on either side of it.

  “Nobody gets into this room without showing you ID. You’ve met her doctor, and the nurses on this floor, but even still, you ID fucking everyone. Do you understand me?”

  Both agents nodded, staring sympathetically at David.

  “We’ve got this, boss. She’s safe,” Marcus assured him.

  David took a breath and nodded. “I know. Thanks, guys.”

  He turned away and walked a few steps before stopping, his hand on his hip, not quite able to bring himself to leave.

  The sound of footsteps made him look up, and he was almost certain it was someone coming to tell him he had to go home, but instead he saw Juliet walking towards him, a small bag clutched in her hand.

  “Hey,” he said, unable to keep the surprise from his voice.

  “Hey,” she replied, smiling slightly as she came to a stop in front of him. Her eyes flicked to Hannah’s room and then back to him. “How is she?”

  “Sleeping now, finally,” he answered, and then sighed. “A lot of bruises, some pretty deep, and a sprained wrist, but nothing life-threatening. She’s a little dehydrated; they’ve got her hooked up with fluids and IV painkillers. She’s still –” He stopped abruptly and took a breath, rubbing his forehead with his fingertips for a second before he continued. “She’s still so anxious and afraid, they tried to give her something to help her sleep and she just. . . she got so scared when she saw the needle. I think they drugged her, Jules.”

  “Yeah,” Juliet murmured, glancing away and then down at the floor. “They found a vial of something in the kitchen. It was mostly full, but there was an empty one in the trash can. The label had been torn off both of them, so we don’t know what it is yet, but it’s probably what they used on her.”

  David sighed again, and Juliet reached up, placing a hesitant hand on his arm. He looked at it, and then at her, his brow creasing slightly.

  “Jules –”

  She withdrew her hand quickly, clearing her throat as she held up the bag in her other hand.

  “I stopped by the house,” she said before he could say anything else, “and got Hannah some fresh clothes, just something for her to wear home. I don’t think she’ll want to wear what she had on again.”

  “Christ,” David breathed as he took the bag from Juliet, “I hadn’t even thought about that.”

  “I figured,” Juliet replied, unable to resist the small smile that curved her lips.

  They fell silent, and Juliet stared at the floor, worrying her bottom lip as her thoughts swirled around in her head. She kept flashing back to earlier that night, her fingers tight on his jacket as she pressed her lips to his, and the stunned look on his face when she pulled away. She felt like she had horribly misjudged everything and made a huge mistake, and now she was terrified about the state of her friendship with David.

  She looked up at him just as he turned his gaze to her, and as he opened his mouth to speak, she blurted out, “I’m sorry.”

  David stared at her, and she continued before he could stop her.

  “I’m sorry about earlier. I was just – I didn’t know what was going to happen, and I was – I was worried about you and Eli, and Hannah, and just everything.” She ran a hand through her hair, her eyes darting everywhere but David’s face. “I was afraid that something might happen to you, and thinking what I would do if I never saw you again, and I just – got caught up in the moment. It was a mistake, and I didn’t –” She was going to say she didn’t mean it, but the words wouldn’t come out, and absurdly she felt tears beginning to rise in her eyes.

  “I didn’t –” she started again, and again she faltered, and then realized he was suddenly very close to her.

  There was a whispery thump as the bag of clothes hit the floor, and then his hands were on her face, tilting her head up. She had a split second to see his eyes, always so ridiculously blue and full of so many emotions she wondered how he could stand it, and then his lips were on hers, soft and warm and just a little dry.

  When he started to pull away, her hands rose to grip the front o
f his shirt, keeping him close, and her lips parted when he kissed her again, catching his lower lip between hers.

  She felt a little breathless when it ended, and when she lifted her gaze to his face, his eyes were still closed.

  A moment later, he opened them, and his expression was serious as he looked at her.

  “Please don’t tell me you didn’t mean it,” he said quietly. “And please don’t ever apologize again for kissing me.”

  She laughed softly, and he grinned, his thumbs sweeping over her cheeks. He kissed her forehead, and she leaned forward, her arms circling his middle as his went around her shoulders. His chin rested on top of her head as she pressed against his chest, and she closed her eyes, taking a breath.

  They had hugged countless times, just like this, but now she knew there was more to it than just friendship, and a warm feeling spread within her as she held him a little tighter.

  After a minute or so, she pulled back, not failing to notice the grins on the two agents stationed outside Hannah’s door, and smiled up at David.

  “Think I’m about ready to pass out,” he murmured, smiling a little ruefully, and he did look suddenly very weary, like the events of the past couple of days were catching up to him all at once.

  “Me too,” Juliet replied, and his smile widened a little.

  David bent to pick up the bag of Hannah’s clothes, and then cast a glance at the door to her room.

  “Come on,” Juliet said softly, raising a hand to rub his arm. “You need to sleep just as much as she does. You’ll see her in the morning.”

  He took a breath as he looked back at her and nodded, returning her small smile as they started for the elevator.

  After a few steps, he took her hand.

  Chapter 56

  When they arrived at the house, Juliet put the bag of Hannah’s clothes in David’s car so he couldn’t forget them in the morning, and they walked around to let themselves in the back door.

  “Damn,” David said, turning to look at it with its piece of plywood still over the broken window. “I forgot to do something about that.”

  “It’s okay,” she replied, closing the door and flipping the lock. “I know a guy. I’ll call him first thing, and he can probably get the glass changed out before Hannah comes home.”

  David nodded. “Thanks, Jules.” He laughed and shook his head. “I feel like I’ve been saying that a lot lately.”

  “I don’t get tired of hearing it,” Juliet said with a soft smile, “but you know you don’t have to thank me.”

  David opened his mouth to say something but what came out instead was a yawn, and with a quiet laugh, Juliet took his arm and led him through the kitchen before stopping at the bottom of the stairs. He looked up the stairs and then back at her, sleep beginning to tug at his eyelids.

  “Shower and sleep,” she said, grinning. “Think you can handle that to-do list?”

  He laughed and glanced down, letting his fingers drift over her wrist and down her palm, weaving his fingers through hers.

  “Yeah, I think I got it,” he replied, then sighed as he glanced around the living room. “There’s just so much I need to do. The living room’s a mess, and I don’t want Han to come home to –”

  Juliet pressed a finger to his lips and gave him a stern look, ignoring the way her stomach flipped when he smirked and kissed her fingertip.

  “David, you look like the walking dead. Don’t worry about the living room, or the door, or anything else. I’ll take care of it.”

  He started to thank her again, but stopped when she raised an eyebrow at him. She let her hand trail down his arm and then fall to her side.

  “Go clean yourself up. You look like hell.” She gave him a playful shove and he finally started up the stairs. Halfway up, he stopped and turned back to her.

  “I’ll wait,” she said before he could speak, and he nodded and continued up the stairs.

  Juliet remained at the bottom, her hand resting on the curved end of the banister as she watched him go, and then took a deep breath as she wandered into David’s home office, surveying the stacks of files and scattered paper. Her mind was a mess of thoughts and emotions and to do lists.

  Sighing, she ran a hand through her hair, her other hand fingering the edge of Luke Connolly’s file where it lay open over the dark wood of the desk.

  After the ambulance left with Hannah and David, she had stayed around the scene for an hour or so before leaving with Agent Warren to drop off David’s car. Then she went home and showered before coming to the house for Hannah’s clothes, already building a mental list of things they needed to do before Hannah came home. She felt a sudden swell of emotion at the thought of Hannah being home, safe and alive, but she knew it could have easily gone the other way, and that the body bag carried out of the basement in Wheaton could have been Hannah or David or Eli.

  Juliet swallowed hard and looked around the room again, her eyes settling on a row of pictures on one of the bookshelves. She crossed to the shelf and smiled at the image of Hannah at thirteen, reclined in a lounge chair next to Harry’s pool, wearing a pair of large pink sunglasses and grinning widely at the camera. Juliet blinked and wiped at her eyes, sniffing quietly as she turned to look for the little box of tissues on the corner of the desk.

  Then she noticed something she hadn’t seen before in this room.

  Moving to the table beside the couch, she picked up a dark wood framed photo and frowned. It was from Harry’s birthday party last year, but she only vaguely remembered having the picture taken. She was near laughter, holding a glass of some alcoholic concoction, and pointing at whomever was behind the camera. David was next to her, but instead of looking at the camera or the person taking the picture he’s just looking at her, a soft little smile on his face.

  She shook her head, lips curving slightly as she placed the picture back on the table, but froze when she saw what was next to it, the memory clear as day.

  It was late May, and the morning had been so overcast they feared the ceremony would have to be moved to the high school gymnasium, but by noon, the sun had finally come out, making the day perfect. David stood between Hannah and Juliet, his arms around both of them, squishing them against his sides. Hannah’s graduation cap was tipped to the side, almost falling off her head from the force of being pulled against her proud father. Juliet had never seen either of them smile so bright.

  Her fingers traced the edge of the frame, then down the tassel hanging off of Hannah’s cap. She thought about how easily it could have all ended; a promising future, a brilliant and loving young woman just – gone.

  Suddenly, it felt like the room was moving, and her vision blurred, the weight of the last six days finally caving her willpower. She pressed a hand to her mouth and caught the first sob, and then leaned her shoulder against the bookcase to keep from sinking to her knees.

  David paused at the bottom of the stairs, rubbing a towel over his damp hair. He looked around and frowned when he didn’t see Juliet in the kitchen or the living room. He moved to look out the living room window, checking to see if her car was still in the driveway, and then heard a soft sound from down the hall. He listened for a moment and when he heard it again he hurried towards the office, stopping in the doorway.

  For just a second, he watched Juliet, noticing the tremor in her shoulders and the way her fingers tightened on the edge of the picture frame in her hand. She was the one who always kept the rest of them in line, whose words cut through the fog in his head, making sense when nothing else did. She was always so strong and calm and together, and it hit him then how much they all abused those qualities, how much they relied on Juliet to be all those things all the time.

  He had called her first.

  After the 911 operator hung up, he tapped her name, always somewhere near the top of his recent contacts, the hard tile of the kitchen still rough under his knees. He leaned on her, used her, needed her, and she had always been there. Now, he thought, it should be his tur
n.

  Juliet straightened and turned, startling a little when she saw David moving towards her, wearing a pair of blue pajama pants and carrying a towel.

  “Sorry,” she said, swiping at her eyes as she shifted her gaze around the room, avoiding looking directly at him. She especially avoided any recognition of the fact that he was wearing only his pajama pants, leaving way more freshly washed bare skin than she was prepared to deal with at the moment.

  “I was, um – just seeing how much cleanup work I had to do. Nice mess you and Eli made, by the way.” She paused and swallowed, running a hand through her hair. Her eyes flicked to his face and then back to the table full of papers. “Some of these weren’t in a box when I brought them, so I’ll have to stop at the office and get more in the morn –”

  David’s hand rising to cup her face, thumb sweeping over the lingering moisture on her cheek, made her stop in the middle of her ramble. She bit at her lip, and her eyes drifted down, trying to focus on the edge of the towel where it hung over his shoulder.

  “Hey,” he said softly, moving his hand to lift her chin. She met his eyes, and he could see hers were red at the edges and a little puffy. His chest felt tight and heavy as he realized the toll all this had taken on her, and he chided himself for ever thinking she couldn’t understand what he was going through.

  “I’m sorry,” he said simply, and smiled at the way her brow wrinkled in confusion. “For everything.”

  She shook her head and his hand fell to her shoulder. “David, you don’t –”

  “Yes, I do,” he insisted. “I’m an ass.” He shrugged, letting the towel drop to the floor, and she gave a short laugh, dabbing at the moisture still lingering in the corners of her eyes. He smiled again, sliding his hand down her arm to take hold of her hand, and took a deep breath.

  “There are a lot of things I’ve never really apologized for, especially to you,” he began. “You’ve always been there when I needed you. For Hannah, for the shit with Karen, for the messes I make at work, and – and I feel like I’ve never returned any of that.”