Dismissed (Smirnov Bratva Book 4)

by T. L Smith

  Then he cups my breasts.

  His two hands now on me without my permission.

  Then he is on me.

  My hands push at him, but it does no good. No good at all.

  A tear leaves my eye as I become stock-still. Fear has me frozen to the spot. His other hand slides into my panties, and with nothing but a loose skirt covering me, he does so easily.

  “You’re it, Samara. You’re it.” His mouth leans toward mine, and there isn’t anything I can do to stop him right now. My body is not obeying my flight-or-fight response. I can’t move. I can’t breathe. And even if I wanted to, I can’t do anything.

  Fear, horror, alarm bells ring loudly then everything goes silent in my mind.

  Blink.

  The music is loud.

  Blink.

  His hand is hard.

  Blink.

  My eyes are sore.

  Blink.

  The tears drip slowly down my face.

  Blink.

  I’m on the floor.

  Blink.

  How did that happen?

  Blink.

  I’m lifted.

  Blink.

  His words of apology are screaming at me.

  I can still feel his hands all over me.

  Everywhere.

  Then I reach down.

  I’m bare, and he did it.

  Blink.

  The door opens.

  Blink.

  Jamie’s trying to help me off the floor, his hands are still on me.

  Blink.

  Security comes in, and Jamie says something then he rushes out.

  Blink.

  He touched me, in places he had no right exploring.

  I didn’t give him permission.

  Blink.

  Dirty….

  I feel dirty.

  “Sam,” my boss says my name, but I can’t answer him.

  My mind is lost, as a battle rages inside me.

  Blink.

  “Sam.”

  I’m moved now, and a dressing gown is placed on me.

  “Your sister is out back waiting for you. Do you need her? What happened, Sam?”

  I shake my head and stand, reaching for my bag which my boss has placed at my feet. I start walking, stopping as I reach the door.

  “Is my lipstick smeared?”

  He looks at me oddly, then shakes his head. I turn and continue my path outside, spotting her straight away parked in her usual spot, and she’s playing on her phone. My hands aren’t steady, my feet want to stay in one spot and not move. But I know better, I know that I need to keep moving. My earbuds go into my ears, while a fake smile etches on my face when I see her then turn around. Raven notices the earbuds, so she doesn’t speak. She always comes to pick me up once she finishes work. ‘Safety in numbers’ is what she always says. I’ve never said no to her doing so, if it makes her happy.

  Pity it was the devil we’re meant to trust that’s hurt me.

  Before long, she stops at our apartment. I can hear her talking to me, trying to gain my attention but I ignore her as if I’m listening to music as I get out and walk up the stairs to the front door. She tears one of the earbuds out, making me jump as I unlock our door. Her hands are up in defense when I turn to look at her.

  “Sam, what’s wrong?”

  I shake my head and drop my bag, walking straight to the shower, then shutting the door locking myself inside. Her fists bang, but I don’t answer.

  “Sam, don’t make me break this door down.”

  Raven knows how to unlock it, but I don’t care. Stepping under the scorching hot water, I can feel it as it hits my skin. The tiny water droplets searing my skin, burning some feeling back into me. Caring about Raven being there though is not a factor I have right now.

  “Sam…” Raven’s voice is closer. She turns off the water and looks at me with a sad face, and it breaks me to see her like that. Except right now I just want the water to do its job and wash away the last few hours and not have to worry about how someone else could be affected.

  “Should I call the police?”

  My nails bite into my legs, I can feel the blood as it starts to break the surface and drip down my leg. Raven notices and pulls my hand free, stopping me from doing more damage.

  “Sam, please tell me.”

  I shake my head. Talking is not something I want to do right now, or ever for that matter.

  Raven stands, there’s water all over her clothes from turning off the taps. She reaches for a towel and wraps it firmly around my body pulling me up. We walk to our room and lay on my bed. She curls up in a protective ball behind me, and that’s how we fall asleep.

  In the arms of someone who won’t hurt me.

  I close my eyes. The nightmares begin about the man that did.

  What a fucked-up world we live in.

  What a cruel and sadistic world.

  The only saving grace is Raven.

  She’s the one person who I do everything for. Otherwise, I don’t think I would have fought to live.

  The things we do for the people we love.

  Chapter 15

  Anton

  He’s back again!

  Thankfully Kazier isn’t here to witness that Jamie’s out there, or else I would have to cut all ties with her because so far her company has involved a cop hanging around our door. Walking out to the road where he’s parked, he spots me straight away. I wait for him to get out of his car and he does. I stay where I am, situated away from him. Otherwise, there may be a dead cop buried in my backyard before the day is out.

  “She hasn’t come to see you?” he asks with a smugness about him.

  “Why would she?”

  The ass shakes his head, but he’s still smiling. “She shouldn’t. I showed her who she belongs to.”

  I can feel the precise moment the vein ticks in my neck, it’s a hard throb, and it’s something I have no control over once it starts.

  “What did you just say?” I ask him. My hands leave my sides, he notices and shakes his head, walking back to his car.

  Just before he gets in, he looks at me again, having the last word. “Remember now, I’ve branded her. Whatever you get now is leftovers. She. Is. Mine.” He gets in his car, and I’m left standing, watching as he drives away.

  What the fuck is he talking about?

  I haven’t seen Sam for a week. She started work last night at the restaurant, but I didn’t go to annoy her based on Kazier’s request. Plus, my cock goes hard the minute I see her, and I still have a few weeks left before I can properly use it again. So putting him under circumstances that don’t involve fucking, doesn’t seem smart right now.

  Walking back into the house, I call her, but she doesn’t answer. Then I remember she’s working tonight.

  The day drags as I wait, nothing to occupy my idle hands. Usually, my cock keeps me fully occupied. Fuck. Maybe I should just take this fucking piercing out of my cock? It’s making me catch feelings because I want to know what the fuck he meant by ‘he branded her.’ She isn’t his. She doesn’t even seem interested in him.

  Viktor ends up coming with me when I decide to go. Sam’s been at work now for an hour, and the first sight of her is breathtaking. She’s dressed in all black, and her hair is up high on her head, and she’s wearing make-up. Sam never wears make-up unless she’s dancing, she doesn’t need it otherwise.

  “Fuck, you’re getting it bad,” Viktor says, nodding his head toward where Sam’s serving someone.

  “Getting what bad?”

  He smirks then turns to watch her again. “I like her, she’s not your usual type of fuck.”

  I scrunch my nose up at him. “My usual?”

  He nods his head. “Yes, ditsy, big tits, fake laugh, blonde…”

  “I don’t….” I trail off. Fuck! He’s right, I so fucking do.

  “Exactly,” Viktor states, then looks behind us then back to her. “Does Kazier know you’re here? He did tell you to stay away from the
business, didn’t he?”

  I shrug my shoulders. He did. Very clearly I might add. He told me not to come when Sam was here. The business has enough heat without me adding to it. Yeah, whatever. I’m a fucking angel.

  “Don’t tell him,” I warn Viktor. I glare at him because he tells Kazier everything, the fucker.

  “I won’t if you go up to her now. I don’t want to stay here any longer than necessary.” He moves to the bar, and the bartender serves him straight away. I crack my knuckles and walk over to her. A week without seeing her seems too long ago. Nerves? Where the fuck did they come from? She’s making me nervous, and she hasn’t even noticed I’m here yet.

  Fuck!

  What if she’s with that guy?

  What if she loves him?

  Her head turns as I reach her, her mouth opening but she manages to close it fast.

  “Anton…”

  Sometimes it’s like she breathes my name heavily into me.

  “Sam.” She looks around fast then back to me. “Should we talk here?” She shakes her head then nods toward the back. Following her, I watch her ass move with each step she takes until we stop in a back room. Sam turns, and she crosses her arms over her chest as she looks up to me.

  She seems nervous…

  “I’m working, so I don’t have long.”

  I nod my head. “I had a visitor again today.”

  Her eyes go wide. “Who?”

  “Jamie.”

  Her reaction, it’s one I’ve never seen touch her face before. She goes white. Her mouth opens wide, her body is stock-still. But it’s in her eyes that hold the hurt. It’s like the windows to her pain, and it’s swimming around in them.

  “Sam.” My hand touches her shoulder, and she recoils away from me.

  My touch was like I physically hurt her. Did I? I remove my hand, looking at it. My touch wasn’t hard, my grip was soft.

  “Please keep him away from me.” She shakes her head then looks past me. “I have to get back to work.” Sam walks past me, her face still white and in shock as she heads back to work. I follow her out and see Viktor at the bar with a glass of vodka in hand. She takes off to the kitchen, so I can’t talk to her again as I go over to Viktor.

  “What happened? She looked scared. Fuck, man, you didn’t hurt her did you?” He shakes his head passing me a glass of vodka.

  “No, it was an odd reaction, though. I don’t really understand what just happened.”

  “Maybe she’s over your shit.” He downs his drink then stands. “Come on, I need to get back to my wife.” He starts walking, and I look back to see if I can see her but she hasn’t come back out. So I follow Viktor and go with him to his house, because why the fuck not. I have nothing else better to do.

  Freya talks about Sam’s sister Raven a lot when we’re there, they seem to have a lot in common and have become fast friends. Viktor is telling me to fuck off after an hour of being there so he can fuck his wife, and all I can think about is what the fuck happened to Sam. Then I start telling Freya what I know, which makes Viktor shitty at me as Freya tells him to stop touching her so she can listen to me.

  “Go to her. Wait there after work and see what’s really happening. Just don’t try to fuck her.”

  “Yes, fuck off,” Viktor moans reaching for his wife.

  I grab his keys and do as Freya recommended. Sam’s shift should be finishing by the time I arrive.

  ***

  Sam’s the last to leave as I sit in the car and wait for her. Raven was here to pick her up, but I told her I’d take her home. She bit her lip, and she thought for a long time before she finally agreed I could. Raven warned me to be nice, as nice as I could possibly be. Her wording though was as if she was worried for her, like I could say something that could hurt her. I didn’t understand her words but with the strength she placed behind them, I nodded anyway.

  Climbing out of the car, I wait at the front, leaning on the hood as I watch her.

  Sam locks the door and turns around, searching for her sister. Her eyes stop on me, and I can tell the exact moment she takes a deep breath and then her chest rises and falls more rapidly.

  “Sam.”

  She takes a step toward me then stops. “You’re just taking me home, right?”

  I nod my head.

  Weird question to ask.

  Opening the door for her, she climbs in then hugs her bag to her chest.

  Odd.

  “Do you plan to talk to me? Or sit there like I’m some sort of stranger.” I start the car up and feel her eyes on me, so I turn to face her, her natural dark eyes that are usually full and sparkling but are now dull and lost.

  “I just want to go home.”

  “That I can do.”

  Driving in silence was not something I’d planned, but when we arrive, she looks around for her car. I forgot to tell her what Raven had told me.

  “Raven went out, she’ll be back tomorrow.”

  Sam looks around and then with a shaky hand reaches for the handle of the door to open it.

  “Sam.”

  She shakes her head, getting out and walking away.

  Something’s off, but what, I’m not sure. Something is telling me to follow her, so I jump out and run up the stairs after her as she looks side to side like someone’s about to jump from a bush and grab her.

  “I’m going to stay.”

  When her eyes look to me, relief floods them. Her hands shake a little less as she pushes the door open, and lets me in, then locks it straight away.

  Standing at the door, she turns to face me. “I’m so tired, Anton.”

  Walking to her, she backs up. “Let me hold you. Nothing more, I promise.”

  Her hand lifts, it shakes as she touches my hand. Her head nods and I reach for her, careful to only touch her like a family member would touch someone, and then hug her to me, lifting her, as I walk us to her bed.

  Tears. I can feel them on my chest as I lay us down in her small-ass shitty bed, and then she cries even harder, her hands clinging onto my shirt. She goes to sleep like that, crying, curled up around me. And not once do I push her off or not want it, which is everything I am not.

  ***

  Sam’s breathing is deep when I finally wake, she’s still in the same position with her legs curled up to mine and her head on my chest as she sleeps. I try to think of a way to move because if she shifts her hand just a fraction, she will be met with a very hard cock.

  “Thank you,” she says, surprising me, I thought she was asleep.

  “Never slept in a bed with a woman before without getting laid,” I joke, but she doesn’t laugh with me. “You didn’t want to be alone. Why?”

  A slight shrug of her shoulders is all I get.

  “Well, this is the least talking I’ve ever gotten after a night with me. Usually, I’m being asked for seconds.” I laugh, but again nothing. “Okay, what the actual fuck is happening, woman?”

  She moves, lifting off me, still dressed in her work clothes as she stands, walking out of the room, leaving me on her bed by myself. I stand, adjust my cock, then follow her. She’s looking out the front window, searching for something then turns back to look at me. “You can go now.”

  Dismissed.

  Just like that.

  Like it was nothing.

  “Tell your boyfriend Jamie to stop coming to my place and telling me he’s yours. He’s about to get himself killed.” Reaching down, I place my boots on, then stand straight up. I expected to see her angry and getting ready to throw something at my head.

  Nothing.

  White as a ghost again.

  “Sam.”

  Tears are streaking down her face, and she has full-body shakes.

  “Did he do something?”

  Sam nods her head, then I remember what he said.

  “Did he touch you, Sam? Without your permission?”

  Sam nods again and her eyes find mine, there is heartbreak everywhere. It crushes a part of me that I never knew ex
isted.

  Compassion, I actually have compassion. Who knew?

  Anger.

  Red.

  It’s all I see.

  Rage.

  She goes to reach for me, but I’m walking before she can touch me.

  I push the door, it slams open, and all I can hear as I go is Sam’s cries coming from the apartment.

  I wasn’t named a killer for killing bunnies.

  But Jamie is about to become my bunny, and he will wish he hadn’t.

  Chapter 16

  Samara

  Empty, that’s all I feel. Until that look—someone I didn’t expect to care—the look that showed me all he wants is murder. He wouldn’t, but my heart breaks all the same. Anton was sweet, kind even and it’s so unlike him. He didn’t talk my ear off, he was quiet for once. I like both sides of him, but the quiet side does something to me, it touches something inside me. It’s like I’m the only person who’s able to see him comfortable. Well, enough that he feels words are not needed.

  It feels like a relief. Telling someone without actually saying anything gave me comfort. Anton was able to guess, and from just the nod of my head, it helped ease the pain a little inside me.

  I haven’t even told Raven.

  I didn’t mean to tell Anton, it slipped out when he saw me too vulnerable. He knew something was up. Words weren’t working, so he dug a tiny bit deeper, and all it took was a head nod for him to know exactly what happened.

  Jamie’s been outside of my apartment a few times after, each time I go into a hyperventilation state and lock myself in the bathroom. He does that to me, freaks me out, and I never want to be near him again.

  Crying myself to sleep every night is the only way I seem to sleep, if I can do that at all. This last week, I have struggled to sleep even for a few minutes but last night was the first time I slept all through the night, and it’s purely thanks to Anton.

  Raven walks in thirty-minutes after Anton left, she looks at me then places her keys on the bench. Freya walks in behind her. I’m still dressed in my work clothes, and I haven’t moved from where I was standing since he left.

  “Sam, we need to talk. You’re hiding something from me, and I need you to tell me.”