Thirst
Page 83
I walked away backward, keeping my eye on him as he sat there with his member now out of sight. I closed the door and I knew that teasing him would only be a stall tactic. I was looking forward to taking things past the teasing stage. I had to make sure that the past wasn’t going to interfere.
Chapter six
I couldn’t bring myself to go back into the office and I sent him a text message to tell him that I would be there at the Airport in two days. I wanted to make him wait on pins and needles to see if I was going to show up or not.
I’d made the preparations by putting my condominium up for grabs in the market. The for-sale sign was out on the lawn and I was going to miss this place more than I could ever say. Gemini wasn’t very happy that I was letting it go. I’m sure that she would’ve paid for it, but she didn’t have that kind of money.
“It looks like you made up your mind, but I think that something might change it.” She didn’t have to tell me. I heard the rumble of the motorcycle and the way that the engine turned off. It sent a thrill through my bones and I shivered at the very thought of how I had used that piece of machinery to drive me out of my mind.
“I don’t know what he thinks that he’s proving. I know who he is and I have no interest in playing that game.” He was still wearing the black leather jacket, but no longer was he holding onto that casual image with blue jeans. He was wearing a suit of all things and looked ready to proclaim that this was his Independence Day.
“You have to admit that he does have a bit of class. He probably felt that you poured cold water in his lap and yet here he is ready to valiantly try again. I don’t know how you got so lucky to have both of these guys looking at you with hunger in their eyes. I don’t even have one and you have two. It’s not like you can hide from this. You’re going to have to hear him out.” I could easily hide, but that would only be sending the wrong message. I had to face this and be strong enough to let him say his peace. I was hoping that I would get that chance myself.
“I don’t want you to leave. Stay in my bedroom and only come out when I call for reinforcements. He has this funny way of leaving me speechless. I think about some of those things that we did and I find myself lazily touching myself in the middle of the night. I wouldn’t even be thinking about him at all if I saw fit to take August for a test drive.” I heard that knock on the door and wearing the face of conviction, I went to answer it with my jeans already quite moist from the sound of that engine revving.
I opened the door and I didn’t even let him get a word in edgewise. I lambasted him for being callous enough to think that he could come back here and win me. “You can see that I’m leaving. You would think that would be some kind of hint. What is it that I can do for you, Jones?” He tried to get around me, but my foot was in his way leaving him to profess his love with the whole neighborhood watching. They weren’t really watching, but it did feel that way.
“I thought that I would make one last effort. I can’t leave without doing this.” He grabbed me and I gave out this startled gasp that was followed by his tongue stabbing into my mouth. I vainly slapped at his chest hoping that would be enough to get him to let me go, but it wasn’t.
The fight that I had was draining significantly with the way that he was touching the top of my palate and sending signals down below. My legs gave out by the sheer pleasure of him kissing me and running his hands down my spine. If it wasn’t for him, I probably would have crashed landed on the floor.
I heard clapping and he finally let me go with two of my neighbors giving what I considered a standing ovation. They were the gossip of the neighborhood and there was no way that this wasn’t going to get around like wildfire.
My lipstick was smeared across his mouth and he was licking that strawberry gloss and smiling like he had done something to change my opinion of him. I immediately grabbed him by the collar of his starched shirt and pulled him into the entrance.
I turned away from him pretending that I was disgusted by his behavior and secretly wanting that kiss to last longer than it did. “I don’t know what you are doing, but that was uncalled for. You know that I have feelings for another man. Just because I don’t have a ring on my finger doesn’t mean that you can manhandle me like some sort of brute.” My voice was a little raised and I was hoping that Gemini was going to interject her thoughts. Unfortunately, I got the impression that she wanted me to handle this on my own. I had to do that or I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror the same way again.
“You can’t tell me that you didn’t feel anything. That is not the kind of passion that you can fake. I know that you have another man that you are interested in, but I don’t care. Like you’ve already said, you don’t have a ring on your finger and even if you did, I doubt that would even stop me. I know what I want. You showed last night that you were ready for more. Again, you can’t fake the eagerness in your eyes when you had me in your hand.” He was throwing that back in my face and I didn’t think that was fair. It was appropriate considering that I was the one that was doing all of that under my own free will.
“You have always been a good kisser and there has never been any reason to deny that. It doesn’t mean that I’m ready to go backward. Being with you is a mistake. I should’ve seen it a long time ago, but you really did throw me for a loop by coming back into my life.” I looked at my watch and I knew that I was going to be late to the airport.
“I wasn’t the only one kissing. That wasn’t one-sided even though you profess differently. You fought me, but then you sank into it and enjoyed every moment. Even your neighbors saw that you were into it.” He was beating a dead horse. If I didn’t do something radical and extreme, then he was just going to think that this kind of behavior was going to be tolerated.
“It gives you no right to touch me like that without my permission. You need to grow up and stop acting like the same teenage heartthrob that you were in high school. Those days are over and you can’t go back no matter how much you want to. I understand that your father dying made you willing to commit. It’s just not going to be with me.” I could still see him naked and it did very little for the temperature in the room.
“My father was one small part of the reason why I came to see you. His words echoed in my ears. I know that I have been wasting my life on those girls that are only with me for my money. I never felt like I was shortchanged when I was with you. There was something real about what we had. I’m not sure that I will ever find that again.” He was afraid of being alone. It made me feel for him.
I took him by his two hands and made him sit down with me sitting on my knees. “I think that it’s a good thing that you know that you can’t stay the same. You need to find somebody that is going to be more than eye candy. I wish that I could be that for you. I’m sure that if things were reversed that you would be telling me the same thing. There’s no point in grasping onto a piece of the past. I’m lucky that I found a man that was accepting of my flaws and vice versa.” His last-ditch effort to win me back had failed.
“I really do feel stupid for coming here. This was supposed to be a gesture. A reminder of what we had and could have again. I see now that it’s not what you want. It can’t be what I want no matter how much I want to cling to the old times. I want a family and I swear that I’m not going to rest until I find the woman that is going to make me feel the same way that I feel about you.” He stood up, gave me a hug that was more friendly than the kind of embrace that I would have expected from him.
“I want you to be happy. Another time and place, we might’ve been able to make it work, but that’s not going to happen. I found one that I want to pursue. You and that damn motorcycle will always hold a special spot in my heart. It’s a relic of a time long ago and maybe it’s time that you finally put her to rest. It’s time for you to get that clean slate.” I was only telling him what I felt. It was going to be up to him to make that commitment to clean up his act.
“If it’s all the same to you, I�
��m going to keep black beauty, but maybe it is time to put her away in storage. Family has always meant a lot to me. I never knew how much until my father died. I have to find a way to carry on the family name.” That was the closure that the both of us needed. It didn’t have to come from us twisting in the sheets together. It would’ve been satisfying and a memory that I would have loved to repeat, but that would have been only asking for more trouble than it was worth.
The door closed and I had my hand on top of it with a silent goodbye in my heart. It was fitting to see him drive off into the sunset alone. I had no doubt that he would find somebody to fill that void that his father left behind.
“That was very touching, but I think that you have forgotten one thing.” I turned to look at Gemini and she was tapping her wrist and making me look with my eyes wide open at the clock and the seconds ticking by. “You’re never going to make it. It’s too bad that you sent him away. You might have had a chance with that motorcycle.” I slapped my forehead, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me.
I tried to send a text message, but the service was down for maintenance. I was cursing myself. We had left things in good terms and Jones would’ve been able to get me to the Airport. I heard the motorcycle and it wasn’t like it was in the distance.
I sprang into action, throwing the one bag that consisted of all of my worldly belongings over my shoulder. It was a green army bag that had been passed down from my grandfather. It had a sentimental connection that made me look like a hobo ready to ride the rails. I didn’t care.
I opened the door. He reached out and I thought that he was going to kiss me again, but this time he grabbed his gloves that he had left behind.
“I wonder if I could ask you for a favor. It’s a bit of an imposition, but I think that we can remain friends.” I told him that I needed a ride to the airport and he was happy to help.
He handed me the helmet and I managed to keep the green army bag in front of me. I told Gemini that she could stay for as long as it took for them to sell the property. She most likely was going to take me up on my offer and disappear once more when the sale was completed.
Chapter seven
The vibration between my legs was the painful reminder that having my arms wrapped around his waist was like that same blast from the past.
“I hate to admit this, but I think that I’m going to have to invest in buying one of these. I don’t think that I have to tell you the reason why. You already know better than others what riding on one of these things does to me.” I was rubbing incessantly and it was a good thing that I was wearing jeans and not a skirt. I probably would have collapsed altogether and become a roadside hazard.
“I know and that’s the reason why I came to see you on it. I’m glad that it still has that effect on you. It’s nice that I can put that smile on your face. Unfortunately, I’m going to send you hot and bothered into another man’s arms. I do have one regret that we didn’t find a way to get that closure by the cries of ecstasy that I could have made you scream in the dark of the night.” I was such a dirty girl for thinking the same thing.
“It seems kind of fitting that you would be the one to come to my rescue. I know that this is not how you wanted to end our story, but our flame could only burn for so long. I think you know that deep down. We’re not right for one another. What we had was not healthy. We both have very strong opinions.” Any more of this and I was going to slide from first base all the way to home.
“There is one girl that I have been reluctant to speak about. I wanted more, but I got caught up in the old habit of sneaking out after the deed was done. I think that I might look her up and see if I can’t convince her to give me a second chance. She’s the only one excluding you that I ever thought that I could have more than a physical relationship with.” This was my time to give him some advice that would hopefully help him in his love life.
The wind was blowing through the hair that was sticking out from underneath the helmet. The vibration was keeping me occupied and making me wonder about how I was going to be able to stand steady when I finally arrived at my final destination.
“You need to learn to be yourself and not what you think that you need to be. Women like a man that is honest and will show some vulnerability. Don’t be so quick to think that you are right all the time. A girl wants to feel protected, but they also need to know that you are willing to listen to reason. That romance that you have fought against is something that you should really think about. Gestures like flowers and candy might seem juvenile, but there are those little things that count the most. Drying a dish or putting away the laundry will leave her wondering what she ever did without you.” He was breezing through traffic and I thought for sure by the way that we were leaning that we were going to come to a fiery end.
We came to the Airport and I was 15 minutes late to the party. I got off, but I had to hold myself against the bike to stop my legs from shaking. One more minute on that thing and I would’ve been done for. I was already breathing heavy and I closed my eyes to try to get back whatever dignity I had left.
“I want you to take a few deep breaths. I do find it funny that you still get that extra jolt every time that you get on black beauty. Both of us have missed you, but I think that I’m going to take your advice to heart and see what I can’t do about finding my own happiness.” My knees were knocking and I did breathe deeply until I finally was able to stand shakily on my own.
“I would really like to find out how things work out for you, Jones. You have my contact information. Let’s keep in touch and be the friends that we should be. Don’t be a stranger. At least now, I can say that I don’t feel terrified of you coming around anymore. Don’t worry, I’m still attracted to you and that’s never going to change. It’s just not enough anymore.” I was wasting time and I watched him wave to me. I ran with moments of having to stop and hold myself up against anything that I could find.
I got to the gate with my lungs burning, but it was too late. “I’m sorry, but the plane has already taken off. I can put you on the next available one. It’s not until tomorrow morning at 5:00 AM. I have two available seats, but I’m afraid that they are in first class.” I didn’t have the kind of money to fork out for that kind of extravagance.
"I can afford that.” I felt my heart fall and I hated myself for making him think that I wasn’t going to be there with him for this new and exciting chapter. “We’ll take both seats in first class.” I heard his voice, but I had to see it for myself to believe it. I turned and I didn’t know what to say. “I was on the plane, but I couldn’t leave without you. There will always be other planes, but there will be nobody quite like you.” His face was like seeing the clouds part with the sun shining through.
“I’m sorry…I’m sorry for being late. I had some unfinished business to do. I think that you’ll be glad to know that Jones will not be bothering me anymore. We are going to keep in touch, but only as friends and nothing more.” He took my hand and brought it up to his lips. It was that extra spark that I needed to clench my legs closed.
“I’m not that insecure that I’m going to worry about a friendship with a past love. That would be petty and I’m through giving you the impression that I feel threatened. The next flight is not for 12 hours. I would like to take that time to learn more about you. I think that I have enough in our budget to splurge on a dinner and maybe two rooms with connecting doors. I would never want to assume anything.” I took his hand and placed it against my chest so that he could feel the thumping presence of my heart giving him the only answer that he would ever need.
“I do want to be close to you, but after everything we’ve both been through, it would be better to start at the beginning. I don’t think that we’re going to need the adjoining room unless of course, you think that you can’t handle being close to me. I would think that we have reached the phase in our relationship that we can trust one another.” I could say that, but I wasn’t sure that I could live up to that p
romise. The motorcycle, his lips on my hand and being close to him in the same bed was a recipe for disaster.
“I think I can handle that.” I had to stretch on my toes to reach his lips. I showed him that there was a promise for more. The orient was a land of mysteries, but the one mystery that I didn’t have was how I felt about him. It was a lot in the last few days. My mind was still going a million miles an hour. I was going to use the anticipation to keep me on the edge. I was looking forward to the Chinese hospitality. I felt that we needed something that was just for us. I wanted this to be the start of something that would last forever. This trip was meant to give us that freedom to be more intimate. One thing was for certain and there were no past loves or present ones that were going to stand in the way.
I was going to have to trust in the both of us that we could keep it in our pants. I wasn’t sure that being in the same room together was a good idea. I couldn’t say anything or that would have led him to believe that I was lost to my own passion. I was hoping to show him in due time. It was going to be interesting when we finally took off the training wheels. We had waited this long, so what was a little while longer. I was just going to have to keep one eye open and contain that passion with cold showers. China was waiting for us with open arms.
BOOK 3: STEAL ME (PART 4)
Blueprints of Love
Amanda never thought that it was possible to have anything close to love at first sight, but there she was about to embark on a journey that had been ripe with sexual tension from the moment that they met. August Rivers was not an easy man to get to know, but underneath the suave and sophisticated ladies man was a kind and gentle soul waiting for somebody to come around to open him up to real love. They have been through their own form of trials and tribulations to get to where they are today. They thought that it was going to be easier away from any distractions including ex-girlfriends and boyfriends that seem to show up at the most awkward time. They were wrong and what they face now is something that will shock the both of them. Will they be able to keep the spark alive?