by Z. Allora
Jin refilled the mug and held it out for Styx to try. Styx drank some before handing the icy water back to Jin, who finished it before putting the mug in the dishwasher.
On the bright side, no more hand-washing dishes. They had to use the dishwasher, as Indigo couldn’t use unsterilized dishes.
“I guess our water isn’t the greatest.”
Styx chuckled. “Hasn’t hurt us. We must be stronger.”
“Yeah, or used to it.” Jin washed the vegetables twice before he chopped the celery and carrots into green and orange cubes. “What do you think of our apartment mates?”
Styx shook his head, not knowing what he thought, let alone what he would say about them. “Well, um, Li is nice.”
“He is. Indigo’s very Western.” Jin grinned over his shoulder as Styx added rice to the cooker.
“He looks Chinese, but he doesn’t sound it.”
“Yeah, his accent is odd. And, I don’t know… his words are very precise.” Jin added too quickly, “But I like him.”
Neither of their new apartment mates used the Suzhou dialect Styx was almost starting to understand. If nothing else, he’d picked up adding in the random “ah” to the end of sentences to get better prices at the local markets.
Styx’s eyes narrowed. When Jin gave him a strange look, he forced himself to stop grimacing. “It’s not how he talks, but what he says.”
Jin nodded. “Yeah. I guess they are together.”
“Together?” Styx tried to process his own assessment of their relationship, so he fell back into his usual method of defense—he chose to remain in a state of confusion. That way he didn’t have to admit the reality of the situation.
“Didn’t you see them kiss?” Jin whistled and lowered his voice. “I think they’re gay.”
Styx ignored the excitement in Jin’s voice. “Hand me the garlic?”
He focused on dicing the chicken into smaller and smaller pieces. If he concentrated on cutting, he wouldn’t have to think about gay people, kisses shared between men, or how Jin seemed enamored with Indigo’s bizarreness.
“And I guess they have an open relationship.” Jin’s statement carried authority, as if he had experience.
“What’s that?”
“When they can do it not only together but with other people.” Jin said it with too much confidence.
Trying not to appear shocked, Styx kept chopping, narrowly missing his fingers. He was trying to adjust to two men in a relationship, and now Jin thought they slept with many men?
“How do you know?” Styx was annoyed and wished for a change in subject. One that didn’t force him to identify what was flowing through his veins. He didn’t want many men… just one.
“I don’t know, from what he said about, um, others joining them.” Jin added the other ingredients to the rice cooker and turned to study Styx.
“Whatever.” Styx stomped to the stove and threw the chicken into the wok, making it sizzle. Jin was right, but Styx wasn’t ready to talk about open relationships, because he didn’t want that.
Jin asked, “Styx, why are you cooking the chicken already?”
He had no clue. “Um, it can sit in the sauce while the rice cooks.”
They finished dinner prep while chatting about safer subjects, like the spa and their schedule.
“If you want to take a shower before dinner, I think you have enough time.”
Jin glanced at the wall clock. “Great. Thanks.”
Styx set the table for four, which was odd, but he didn’t mind. He popped a CD into the media player Jin’s uncle had gotten them. The guy had put flat-screens in both bedrooms and the living room. Styx didn’t believe him when he said he’d done it for potential buyers, but appreciated the gift. Within moments, Jin’s favorite album of rock-and-roll and heavy-metal hits from the past ten years echoed off the walls.
Pondering his new apartment mates, Styx realized they’d cause trouble. Just seeing them together had him fantasizing about impossibilities. Maybe options existed in the US of A, but not in Suzhou, and certainly not in his hometown.
Men didn’t go with men. Gay was a Western concept, or at least that’s what he’d heard his father say.
He didn’t want to label what was between him and Jin. His best friend seemed to have no aversion to watching him get off, but what Styx wanted most was an impossible dream.
He checked the steamer; both rice and vegetables were ready. The chicken was still hot. He added more sauce and then sauntered across the apartment to tell their new roommates dinner would be ready soon.
The door to his old room was open a crack, revealing something that stunned him. He pressed his face against the opening for a better view.
Indigo and Li were together on one of the twin beds, with their pants around their ankles. Indigo perched on top of Li, facing his feet. His head rose and fell in cadence with his humping ass. Indigo’s eyes were closed, and his lips slid down Li’s cock. Styx imagined that, when Indigo’s hips slammed down, Li’s lips did the same.
Styx’s eyes burned. Indigo’s cheeks hollowed as his head bobbed over the engorged shaft, and Li’s hands gripped his naked butt.
Indigo pulled off and moaned. “Hey. Careful, Li, my cock is rock-hard. I don’t want you to chip a tooth.”
Li’s reply was too muffled for Styx to hear, but his hand slapped Indigo’s round ass. The desperate groan that followed shot to Styx’s caged cock.
“What are you doing?”
Styx jumped as Jin whispered in his ear. He hadn’t heard Jin approach.
“Um, ah….” What could he say? He dragged his gaze away.
Jin grinned at him.
“Let’s finish dinner, and I’ll tell them we’re ready to eat in a bit.” Jin’s grin became a smirk. “If they’re even still hungry. I bet they feed each other well.”
Jin’s attempt at humor only served to make Styx red in the face as his cock fought the belt for freedom.
The noises drifting through the open door suggested events were reaching a climax.
Styx followed Jin to the kitchen without giving in to the temptation of glancing back.
He wanted to die of embarrassment, but he couldn’t deny it was the most erotic thing he’d ever seen. As teenagers, he and Jin had gotten their hands on some yellow books, but staring at dirty books filled with naked ladies did nothing for him. He tried not to dwell on how right two men enjoying themselves appeared. Styx struggled with how much he craved to put Jin in a similar position, but the more he tried to ignore the awareness, the stronger it became.
Jin hummed as he finished preparing the meal, unbothered by what they’d witnessed.
WHEN JIN knocked on the door fifteen minutes later, Indigo and Li came to the table like nothing had happened. Styx tried to find something different about them after what they’d done.
Though Li yawned and kept grinning, Indigo didn’t have a hair out of place.
How can they act so calm?
“What?”
Dammit. Li had asked him something while Styx had been replaying the vision of what he’d seen earlier.
Li restated his question. “I asked where you go shopping. The vegetables are farm fresh.”
Styx was a blushing idiot but couldn’t think past where Li’s mouth had been a short time ago. “Um, there’s a farmer’s market about fifteen minutes from here by bus. There’s a Japanese grocery store on the other side of the convention center, but it’s way too expensive.”
“Bus?” Indigo was stuck on the mode of transportation. “You take the bus?”
“Yeah. Suzhou’s subway lines don’t go all the way out there. You just take Bus 206 over the bridge to the swimming pool complex, switch to Bus 136, and take it to the end. The market is right across the street,” Styx rambled, but his thoughts were elsewhere.
Li and Indigo had sex. Sex! Well, if you called what two men do together sex.
And now they were sitting having dinner as if nothing had happened.
&nb
sp; Indigo smiled and nodded his approval. “Better for the environment. LA doesn’t have any mass transit system worth mentioning. You have to drive everywhere.”
“As if you wouldn’t want to drive your sweet ride down to get your mail.”
For all of Indigo’s experience, he flushed at Li’s easy teasing. The rosiness of his cheeks made him appear even younger. “I do love my car.” Indigo glanced at Li before changing the subject. “Any clubs here?”
Styx answered, trying to be helpful and polite. “Sure. Across the street, there’s a German restaurant and beer garden with a band. If you consider what they play music—”
Jin interrupted him before he could go off on the terrible band. “If you walk a little farther, to Harbor Bay, there are several restaurants, some KTVs, and a few bars.”
“KTV—that’s like a karaoke place?” Indigo glanced at Li.
Li nodded.
Indigo grinned and returned his attention to Jin. “No, I meant more of a boys’ club.”
Styx stared at him, not understanding. Indigo used proper Mandarin, but once again the words he put together made no sense.
Jin chimed in. “There’s only one. It’s in downtown Suzhou, but they’re renovating for the next month or so.”
Styx shut his mouth to listen in an attempt to figure out what they were talking about.
“Just one?” Indigo’s eyes widened, and the corners of his lips turned down in disappointment.
Li laughed. “You should be happy Suzhou has even one. This isn’t Shanghai.”
“Ha! Like Shanghai is much better.” Indigo sounded a tad spoiled and put out. He directed his next question at Jin. “Do you know last month the police raided one of the clubs in Shanghai?”
Jin frowned. “Oh?”
Indigo huffed. “Yeah, they arrested twelve guys for having their shirts off.”
Styx raised a brow. “Why did they have their shirts off?” He never asked questions, but this American just kept baffling the hell out of him.
Indigo shrugged. “They were dancing, and hot, but the police called it indecent exposure! Can you believe it?”
“Well, it was in public.” Styx found himself defending the laws ingrained in him. It was abnormal to question the rules.
“Yeah, so what? People on Saturday mornings go all over Shanghai in their silk pajamas and slippers. And that, by the way, that’s not just unfair; it’s scary and weird.”
“WTC,” Li said.
Styx turned toward Jin for clarification as Li spoke.
“WTC?” Jin asked.
Indigo inhaled and nodded. “Welcome to China. It’s Li’s way of reminding me I am not in the States.” Indigo sighed. “No disrespect to your country. Seriously, I love it here. If Big Brother is listening, I love China.”
Indigo craned his neck around as if searching for hidden microphones and lowered his voice. “But I can’t even get YouPorn here. And forget Facebook and blogs….”
After a riot in 2009, the government had blocked Facebook. He guessed Indigo didn’t like China’s clone, Renren.com. It didn’t matter to Styx, since his hometown didn’t have very good internet service anyway, but apparently Indigo had a problem with it.
Li patted his hand. “They’re testing Facebook again in the Free Trade Zone.”
Indigo rolled his eyes. “Yeah, so what? A few expats who live in that seventeen-mile zone can like animal pictures…. The average Chinese person can’t watch porn but is able to watch a woman kill a kitten with a high-heel shoe without an issue. Did you see that video? Seriously, that’s just fucked.”
Sighing, Li said, “I know it doesn’t make sense to you—”
Indigo gazed at Li. “But it doesn’t matter. As long as I’m here with you.” He grabbed Li’s hand and kissed the knuckles. “I’d give everything up for you.”
Li shifted in his seat. “Which is why you’re here. To see if you can.”
“I can.” Indigo’s focus zeroed in on Li until he seemed to remember there were others in the room and pulled his attention away with a smile. “I appreciate you guys letting us stay with you. We had to get out of Shanghai for a while.”
Jin leaned forward. “Yeah. My uncle said you punched someone in the face.”
Indigo shrugged. “And I’d do it again.” His eyes darted to Li.
Styx stared at Indigo. It was rare to hear of someone resorting to physical violence. Plus, the guy appeared more cool than tough. “Who’d you punch?”
“Some jackass hitting on my baby.” Indigo squeezed Li’s hand. “This chicken is delicious. Who cooked it?”
The tender gazes passing between Indigo and Li surprised Styx. Whatever was between them didn’t seem bad or dirty.
And Indigo thought Styx’s chicken was delicious. Maybe the guy wasn’t a complete dick all the time.
AFTER THE dishes were cleared and stacked in the dishwasher, Li and Indigo retired to unpack more. Styx tried not to envision Indigo sucking Li’s cock, but it was impossible.
“Are you okay? You’ve gotten quiet.”
Styx sighed and turned away from Jin. “Yeah. I’m fine.”
Tonight would be their first night sleeping in the queen bed together. Styx tried to ignore the anticipation. He shed his jeans, pulled on his sleep pants, and asked, “Do you understand all of what Indigo’s saying?”
Jin laughed. “Some. His phrasing and what he calls things is different.”
“Yeah, I mean I didn’t have a clue what kind of club he was talking about, you know? Boys’ club, what kind of club is that?”
“Boys’ club, well, that’s a club for men.”
Jin sat on the bed and crossed his legs. Styx lay back and enjoyed the thick mattress. Anything was more comfortable than the thin piece of foam he had at home. Jin’s uncle had furnished the apartment to Western standards, which meant the bed was plush.
“Like KTV?” KTV catered to the businessmen while women of questionable standards drank and sang karaoke with them.
“More like a bar for men.” Jin’s stare weighed on Styx.
He wasn’t stupid but what did that mean? Shaking his head, he waited for more information.
Jin clarified. “For men who like men.”
There were other men who liked men in Suzhou? And there were enough of these men for them to have their own club? How was it possible? “I just—never mind.”
“What?”
Jin knew too many ways to torture the truth out of him. Years of practice had taught him all Styx’s weaknesses.
What would he think of his biggest one?
“Just, um, Indigo and Li.” Styx had seen it with his own eyes, but he hadn’t yet processed it. The difference between his culture’s expectations—what Styx had always imagined to be true—and the reality unfolding under his nose made his head hurt.
“Yeah?” Jin’s tone suggested he’d force Styx to say it.
“When they, you know, were together….”
Jin nodded.
“It’s just, until today, I didn’t know how that could work.” Knowing and acknowledging are two different things. He’d picked up his father’s way of dealing with things: if one didn’t accept information, one didn’t have to deal with it.
“Well, yeah, that’s one way it would work.” Jin’s ease with the topic made Styx uncomfortable.
“And how do you know?” The idea of Jin with another guy didn’t sit well with him.
“The spa. I told you I don’t do much more than watch or tell them what to do, but some of the other guys….”
“What, other therapists?” Styx became light-headed, imagining how many of his coworkers had done what he’d watched Li and Indigo do.
“Doesn’t matter who. Some of the VIP clients are into different things, and there are many ways for a guy to get off with another guy.”
“Like how?” Styx’s piqued curiosity overrode his anger.
“Well, Li and Indi demonstrated one way.”
Styx didn’t want Jin to already h
ave nicknamed Indigo. Geez, he was jealous of the funny-talking American.
“Yeah, like a blowjob.” Styx resisted the urge to check around to make sure no one heard him. Saying the word aloud sent a chill of the forbidden through him.
Jin’s smile gleamed in the colorful light flooding the room from the building across the street. “Yup. Men can be together like a man and a woman.”
“How?” Styx couldn’t even imagine such a thing. He never got beyond kissing and touching Jin in his fantasies. He’d never even heard whispered rumors of such a thing. Where did they connect?
Jin stared at him and tilted his head.
The light of understanding flicked on in Styx’s head. “Oh. Are you serious?”
Grinning, Jin nodded.
“Doesn’t that hurt?” Styx had trouble not imaging major, well, pain in the ass.
“Not if you go slow and use something to make things wet. A lot of the clients enjoy anal stimulation. Giving and receiving appears rather enjoyable.”
“You’ve never—” Styx didn’t finish the sentence. It made him hurt.
“No. Never.” Jin’s voice was soft as he traced Styx’s face before tucking his long, unruly hair behind his ear. “I waited.”
Waited? Waited for what? For me?
“You’d do that?” A kernel of hope grew in Styx’s heart.
“Only with the right person.” Jin’s stare intensified until Styx’s insides clenched with need.
“What?” To play dumb was safer… wasn’t it?
“Nothing. Never mind.” Jin’s look of confused hope dissipated.
Disappointment kicked Styx. Maybe pretending ignorance was really stupid because of the opportunities it tossed away.
Leaning forward, Jin asked, “Did you find it sexy to watch them?”
“No!”
“Liar.” Jin’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Seeing his lily-white ass bouncing up and down as he sucked Li off like a common whore. Admit it got you horny.”
Jin’s dirty words lit his imagination again. Styx closed his eyes, and the image Jin painted appeared. He mentally replaced Indigo with Jin. Jin’s cheeks hollowed around a cock… his cock.
