by Yoshiyuki Ly
A warm breeze blew over me, heating me hotter by the second. Her smile spoke to me: ‘Not all of us from Eden are bad.’ I wanted to believe those words coming from her full, rosy lips. I hadn’t let myself look at another woman since Nyte way back when. Anyone else had only wanted a piece of my power. She had plenty of her own. For the first time in ages, I could gaze at someone like this without feeling threatened, or worried, or anxious.
I didn’t even know her and she managed to soothe me somehow.
Satya’s voice finally filtered through. “Raj?” she said. “What do you think? Should we?” The look I gave her told her I hadn’t been listening. She smiled. She knew my tastes in women. “The raid in a few minutes—should we take Luna with us? She’ll be able to slip away and go back home—”
“—no!” cried Luna. “My sister will be upset that I ran off. I don’t want to face her…”
“Why not?” I asked. “Is she gonna go off on you? Hurt you for leavin’?”
“No…nothing like that,” she muttered. “We argued a lot. I’m supposed to marry one of my childhood friends. He comes from a rich family. I told her I didn’t want to. I said I wanted her to cancel the arranged marriage, and if she didn’t, I’d run away. I don’t want to go back. I know how it makes me sound… I’m the entitled, spoiled brat who didn’t get her way. But I can’t go back to that life.”
Satya frowned in worry, asking, “She couldn’t cancel it, or she wouldn’t?”
“I don’t know,” said Luna. “All I remember was that it wasn’t happening fast enough. I kept telling her that we didn’t need the money. She kept telling me that it was written in our parents’ will for me to marry him, and that we had to honor their wishes. I was only four when they passed away. I don’t remember them at all. My sister is ten years older. She remembers them. I never had a problem with doing as she said before. With this, I just couldn’t…and that’s how I ended up here.”
“We’ve got another problem,” I said. “Kurtz wants some kinda arrangement to see you again. I can’t do that if you go back home.”
Luna hid behind Satya. “You’re not going to send me back to him?” she asked. “Are you…?”
This decision would cost me. I knew it would. But I couldn’t justify putting this girl in the middle of my business. Whether she really was a spoiled brat or not, she didn’t deserve that. No one did. “You ain’t goin’ nowhere if you don’t want to,” I assured her. Luna sighed in relief. “If your sister’s the kinda person I think she is, she’s gonna be down here to find you soon enough. I can’t get in the middle of family. If she wants to take you back home, you’ve gotta do as she says. If you wanna negotiate with her, that’s fine with me. You’re welcome to stay here as long as you’re willin’ to work.”
“Thank you…Empress,” she spoke shyly. I smiled at her. “I heard about what a kind, caring person you are. I’ll do whatever you need.”
“Satya, you stay here with her,” I said, heading for the door. “Find out what she’s good at and see where we can put her. I’ve gotta lead the raid—I’m almost late.” As Satya wished me good luck, she noticed I still had Luna’s locket. She didn’t say a word about it. That was her silent way of encouraging me to keep it.
Everyone in Elysium knew what time it was. The clock towers struck midnight. My people out on the streets got up, stopping their poor charade to follow me for our peaceful assembly up in Tynan proper. My bandits stopped partying in Slutgarden and stayed behind me. Bigger and bigger the crowd grew; they had their torches raised as they rallied. As I made my way over to the rising Charon Bridge between Elysium and Eden, I felt weird about the necklace in my hand. Like I shouldn’t have had it with me. I fastened it around my neck for more good luck. I wanted this raid to be the last one. The last time we shouted and yelled at the paladins and priests to do something about the nobles who loved putting us down. Every time we did this, I resisted the impulse to destroy the knights in our path. If we resorted to murder out on the streets, the Holy Knights Thirteen might have finally done something. I couldn’t sink to that. I couldn’t rise above the truth in our city, either—that this was the way things were. We made a ruckus and got bandages put over our problems until something worse happened later, and something worse after that, and worse and worse and worse. This was insanity, I knew it—doing the same thing and expecting the same result. But the pride I felt from having my people behind me, marching up the Charon Bridge to the Grand Cathedral to get shit done—that never went away.
For as long as I ruled our underworld, the people could be sure I’d end this madness one day—even if I wasn’t.
Chapter Two
The Right of Assembly
(Videl)
Time dilated, slow enough to make me take in the full chaos of the masses of people rushing past me. Their shouts and cries shut down the order we’d had in the plaza near the Grand Cathedral. Fountains and masonry of marble and smashed to ashes. Mobs of Elysium’s citizens pushed their way through my unit, through my superiors, nearing the Grand Cathedral. Their rage shocked me into sympathy for them. I had no power but to let them pass, trying to keep my balance between this hurricane. I heard Ser Rin’s coarse yelling, ordering us to fight back to re-establish the peace.
One by one, my fellow knights raised their blades, injuring innocent citizens to make them back down. Blood spilled along the stone ground of the plaza, spreading as a crimson plague. I refused to add to that bloodshed. I sheathed my blade. I let the mob push their way past me. They congregated in front of the platform where the Holy Knights Thirteen typically stood for their monthly speeches. The crowd demanded that one of the Knights make an appearance. Their complaints and anger joined into a movement that was no less impactful than the last one. I envied the vigor with which the Elysium citizens led their lives. It wasn’t my place to cut them down, fueling their hatred for Eden’s elite.
Finally, when the Lord Commander Cain Astaroth appeared, he raised his voice to speak over the noise, “Your Right of Assembly has been recognized! Where is your representative?”
Elysium’s people called their Empress to step forward. They clapped as she rallied the crowd. I couldn’t hear the rest. I made my way into the Grand Cathedral to escape the noise. The silence, the moonlight beaming in from the lancet windows, and the seclusion calmed me down after the intrusion. These “raids” Elysium did wasn’t anything new for most of the knights here. This was my first time on-duty at midnight in years, so it was new to me. I’d needed something to take my mind off my sister and me arguing again. This wasn’t at all what I’d had in mind.
I sat in the congregation area, staring up at the quire for what felt like hours. I prayed for this to be Elysium’s final violent assembly. I prayed that my commanding officers wouldn’t find some way to punish those who ignored Ser Rin’s orders. Above all, I prayed for Luna’s forgiveness. Ever since she turned sixteen, and it was time to prepare for her arranged marriage once she was seventeen, we’d had this disconnect between us. She didn’t want to spend as much time with me, preferring to stay out with her friends and dating boys. I told her she’d end up in trouble one of these days. Luna refused to listen to me. I felt sick to my stomach, worrying over where she was; if she was safe or not. She’d said she wanted to spend the weekend over her friend’s house.
“You do everything else for me!” she’d argued. ”You worked hard to get rid of our father’s stupid debts and clear our names! You’re one of the highest-ranking paladins in Tynan! Anything I need, you give me the money for it or promise you’ll surprise me with it soon! Why can’t this be the same?”
I shuddered from the memory, afraid that Luna wouldn’t come back home this time. She hated me for not being able to stop this marriage. She didn’t care that it was against the law to ignore a loved one’s will. All she wanted was the freedom she’d had back when we didn’t have as much money. I hated myself for making her so unhappy…but there was nothing I could do. I wasn’t naïve enough to beli
eve that God’s Light would keep her safe. Not anymore. I was a terrible sister and a worse paladin now.
If I went back home, and she wasn’t there, I knew my faith would break completely. My faith and my career were all I had. I took pride in my armor, in my honor. I didn’t have to worry about men looking at me like they thought they could have me. Women, either. My long hair was my only real claim to my femininity. I liked that idea that no one could tell what I was at first glance—male or female—and that I fell into this invisible gender. I enjoyed it for as long as I could remember. Growing up, I’d learned the difference, socially, between genders, and when I’d told myself that none of it was fair. I’d spent too many nights crying myself to sleep out of frustration—that I had to deal with sexism no matter how far I looked away; that I couldn’t have the freedom that men did to chase after any woman they wanted; that it was expected of me to act a certain way because of what I was born as…something I never asked for.
To make things worse, I always felt that these were things I had no control over. The powerlessness was what got to me the most. I had no desire to pass as a man. I still would have felt society’s injustice regardless. Pretending to be neither gender was all I could do to leave those feelings behind. But that made it difficult to have relationships, sexual or otherwise. I stayed away from them. I didn’t feel like I could trust myself to be vulnerable with someone, to open myself for them. Every time I thought about it, I imagined having to deal with all of the reminders of what I really was. The thought burned me so bad that my whole body tensed. I fought back the mental urge to physically run away from the imagery. At the same time, I suspected that I’d get over this someday; I wanted to be able to trust someone like that, and to be able to let go without feeling my world’s walls closing in on me. Throwing myself into my work was all I could do to not dwell on those fears of mine.
Zephyr Seraphim Rin barged in through the double doors. “To the Lift!” he barked. I turned and saw a band of low-ranking temple knights following him, staring at the ground as they went. “Everyone! Now!”
The group following him had all been outside during the confusion. I followed them to the Lift leading down to the ground floor. Ser Rin stared at me strangely, but otherwise didn’t protest. He didn’t really mean everyone. Just the young temple knights. I noticed none of them had blood over their swords, whereas Ser Rin did. He had them line up along the walls of the dank hallway, pacing in front of them. They all tried to hide how nervous they were. A group of my fellow Seraphims filed in, standing with me along the opposite wall. We watched the exchange, feeling uneasy. Ser Rin wasn’t particularly known for his patience and understanding.
“Elysium continues to abuse their rights!” he shouted. “They sneak their rats in and out of Eden each time, as if we don’t notice! They demand protection against the nobles who have grown weary of their charades! And what do we do? Why, we allow this to keep happening—again, and again, and again, forcing the Holy Knights Thirteen to question our ability to maintain order! This is why we must cut the rats down! We must put an end to their complacency!” Ser Rin collectively gestured to their swords. “Each of you disobeyed me. Each of you helped to perpetuate the stigma that Elysium can continue to bully us until they have their way. There are so many of you! Surely this was an organized protest!” The temple knights looked to one another in fear, in confusion. I knew where this was going. “Who is your leader!? Step forward!”
I was about to point out how ridiculous this was. Ser Kerse whispered to me, “You’re exempt, Ser Videl. Don’t get in the middle of this. You know better than to risk your head for a bunch of new recruits.”
Ser Rin laughed when no one stepped forward. “How predictable!” he boasted. “Let’s sweeten the pot, shall we? Leader or not, organized or not, I will allow one of you to take the fall for the whole group. One of you will suffer twenty lashes for your insubordination. One of you will be on indefinite, unpaid leave from the Excalibur. One of you will remain under investigation as to whether or not I might personally strip you of your title. If no one steps forward, then you will all face these consequences! Now choose!”
Most, if not all of them, came from lower-class families who could barely afford to eat. They’d enlisted as temple knights for a chance to provide for their loved ones. I knew that struggle all too well. I couldn’t let one of them—or any of them—be punished for staying true to their morals, their personal honor.
I stepped forward and said, “Zephyr Seraphim Rin—I’ll take the fall for them.”
Ser Rin leered at me. “Are you mad?!” he taunted. “Listen to your fellow paladins, Ser Videl. You are exempt! Stay out of this!”
“My sword is just as clean as theirs,” I pointed out, holding up my Mutsunokami. “I didn’t injure any of Elysium’s people. These temple knights you’re trying to intimidate—they have nothing without the Excalibur. Their families will die by the time you decide to reinstate them! If you’re so determined to punish someone for not following your orders, then punish me. Leave them out of this!”
He knew he couldn’t win. I’d already humiliated him. Ser Rin beckoned me to follow him to the torture chamber down the hall. The room was filled to the brim with cages hanging from the low ceiling, burning furnaces, spiked racks and chairs, saws and head crushers. Each time I came in here, it smelled like the dried blood of innocents. I felt everyone’s eyes on me as I removed my armored coat. I left my undershirt on along with the rest of my armor. Rin stared at me in disbelief, in horror as I walked over to him. The thick leather whip in his hand didn’t look like it belonged in his hold. I turned away and knelt down, breath held; prepared.
My every imperfection I held right along the skin of my back. Failures with my sister, short-sidedness with my love life, and everyone else I’d let down in the past—they stayed with me. Heavy, sharp crack of the whip met my back. I jerked forward, downward, and sucked my breath in. I transformed the unbearable stinging into a bearable lesson that I was worthless for these remaining nineteen lashes. Harder he whipped me, grunting in his frustration with me. I didn’t cry out. How impressive this must have looked to everyone watching. The trained demon inside of me smiled. On the outside, my skin screamed for me—mouth open wide, with no air, only a constant barrage of pain. Welting marks from my superior’s ego burned through my flesh. Tears welling in my eyes betrayed me. I wouldn’t let them fall. I clawed at the stone ground as the weight from the whip steadily got the better of me…
“Ser Rin! Stop this now!”
Archangel Vespair, Ser Rin’s commanding officer, charged in the room. She was but one rank below the Holy Knights Thirteen—and a dark knight, not a paladin. Her regal-looking armor as blue and black as night clanged heavily as she stormed over to me.
Ser Rin stammered to greet her, “A-Archangel Vespair, what brings you here—?”
“You arrogant bastard!” raged Vespair, smacking the whip from his hands. “If we weren’t underneath the Cathedral, I swear I’d ring your neck with that thing and choke you to death! Are you drunk on authority? Can’t keep Elysium’s rats in-line, so you take out your impotence on your subordinates? How dare you! Get out of my sight!”
I listened to Rin’s slow footsteps leaving the room. Vespair rushed to my side. She helped me to my feet, asking if I was all right. She’d been a mentor to me for years after first helping me enlist when I was seventeen years old. I was familiar enough with her that we referred to one another without honorifics. Vespair was one of the most dedicated knights I knew. I was honored to have her support…but I wasn’t used to her compassion. She’d always been a temperamental woman, prone to outbursts or otherwise eerily calm. She supported my weight as she took me up to the infirmary, muttering curses and specific ways she wanted to make Ser Rin suffer for what he’d done. As the healer applied soothing oils and herbs over my skin, Vespair stared at me with an expression I couldn’t make out. Her face was totally concealed by her helm. I had only vague glimpses of her dee
p blue eyes beneath her visor to go off of.
Once the healer left, Vespair and I sat in silence for a long moment. The energy about her seemed tense. Uncertain. I braced myself for whatever she had to say.
“I don’t know how to put this,” she began. “This is a time of crisis with Elysium up in arms. The Holy Knights Thirteen have overvalued orders to contain the fires. As soon as I heard this, I knew that pompous ass would take advantage of it.”
“So, technically, his orders came down from the chain-of-command…”
“…right above my head, yes,” said Vespair, sounding sad. “That includes the punishments for not obeying said orders. I will do all I can to challenge this. It would be easier to just kill the one responsible.”
“You know that’s a bad idea,” I told her. “Years ago, you told me that the only reason you stayed in the Excalibur is because of the benefits. You get to cut down every unholy, corrupt noble in your path without worrying about the consequences. Being a high-ranking dark knight affords you a lot of luxuries. If you defy the Holy Knights Thirteen, they’ll find a way to make you pay for it. Not even you could stop that from happening.”
Vespair let out a sardonic laugh. “And you sound completely unconcerned about being without pay indefinitely until this is solved!” she said. Reality came crashing back down over me. I’d been so focused on doing the right thing that I’d forgotten about the rest of the consequences. “Ah, she shows some concern at last! That’s more like it. Then again, those lashings weren’t much of a punishment for someone with your extracurricular activities. You liked kneeling down and taking it, didn’t you?”
