by Yoshiyuki Ly
“I’m…not used to it like I was before.”
“It has indeed been a few moons since you paid your Mistress a visit in that capacity. You might want to see her after we leave.”
“Why?” I asked. “Did something happen to her? Is it her depression?”
Vespair stared at the ground. “It isn’t her you need to worry over,” she replied. “Your sister’s run off. I heard a group of perverts in Maleficus trafficked her down to Elysium.” Light-headedness overwhelmed me. I wanted to run down there and bring her home. Any time I tried to move, my weakness took over, keeping me in place. “Luckily, I have good news. Luna is safe—for the time being.”
“How? Did she get away? Where is she?”
“At Vassago—the Empress of Elysium’s headquarters. My sources say the Empress is finding work for her there. Seems your sister passed up the chance to come home… At least she’s unharmed.”
I’d lost my position—indefinitely—to corruption in the Excalibur, and now Luna was in Elysium of all places. She’d felt the need to run away from me. The thought of someone raping her brought back the pain from those lashes. All over, everywhere, my body buckled beneath the weight. I should have done more to keep her happy. I hadn’t fought against the case in fear of losing my title. I had to deal with not having a job and not having my sister safe with me anymore.
“Take it easy, Videl,” said Vespair. “It’s clear you’re blaming yourself over this mess.”
I blinked away the weakness from my eyes. “Can’t help it,” I answered. “Luna is all I have left. As soon as she started getting older, I was afraid something like this would happen. I feel like I’m not worth all that much if I can’t take care of her. If I can’t protect her.” Slowly, I got to my feet, determined to change things. “I’m going to find her. How do I get to this headquarters you mentioned?”
“You’re going to Elysium in half a suit of armor and no idea where to look?” she asked, incredulous. “I know you need to find your sister. You have to think this through first. Did you forget what will happen if you set foot down there?”
“I’m exempt from being ex-communicated, Vespair,” I reminded her. “One of the perks of my rank. I can come and go between Eden and Elysium as I need to while I’m not on active duty. That will change whenever they decide to reinstate me.”
Vespair left the infirmary with me. “They must have changed that,” she mused. “If you’re to be gone for a while, you should let your Mistress know. She wouldn’t stop asking after you earlier.”
“She isn’t my Mistress anymore.”
“She cares about you as if she were. I told her the news. She’ll be worried sick by now.”
Vespair promised to tell me how to get to Vassago only after I did this. I didn’t have any clothes that would help me blend in with Elysium’s citizens. She suggested that I take a few from my old wardrobe that I’d left behind at my previous Mistress’ home. I made my way to Venus’ Embrace, the area where Eden’s sensible nobles chose to live. The homes there weren’t over-the-top like the ones near the Empyrean Palace. On the way there, I passed by the Twin Adder hospital where Luna’s future husband worked as a healer. I couldn’t call him that anymore. Not that I wanted to. I knew Luna didn’t care that he was the youngest professional healer in the field. I knew she didn’t care for his money, either. She wanted things to go back to when we didn’t have as much money and no one knew who we were. No one except our father’s debt collectors breathing down my neck until I paid them back.
If the Empress of Elysium was anything like the rumors said, then my sister was in good hands. I couldn’t believe that on my own, but Vespair seemed to think so. I decided to trust my mentor about this.
***
I used my key to unlock the door to the modest mansion. At nearly three in the morning, the night sky washed through the wide windows, lighting up the antiques and china in the rooms. I heard the faint tunes of the radio coming from the sitting room. Songs from the last decade played as I made my way there. I remembered them—they were from when my parents had passed away, and I was desperate to take care of my sister. We’d been middle class citizens back then. We had no options other than clawing up Tynan’s social ladder for financial protection, or giving up and leaving to Elysium.
That was when I’d met her—a powerful noblewoman with a lot of connections in the Excalibur and Grand Cathedral, including Vespair herself. The information hadn’t been free. I’d consented to serving as her slave during my training to become a temple knight. This started when I was just fifteen years old. Illicit and illegal—but, out in the open, because of my Mistress’ power, people turned a blind eye to it. She’d had me escort her to court in the Empyrean Palace to gossip with the nobles, showing me off as her sex slave, knowing that they wouldn’t say anything to her face about it. I loved taking care of her and making her happy—two things I hadn’t had with Luna as much as she got older, if not in the same ways. Having that life made me realize how much I wanted and needed to please whoever I was with.
Once I’d taken my oaths as a fully-fledged paladin four years ago, our relationship had to end. As part of my holy tenets, I could only be seen in that capacity with the one I intended to marry. It would have caused too much of a scandal had I married her. My merits and titles ran the risk of being questioned by the priests. Even though she’d promised me she understood, she hadn’t been the same since then. Her depression slowly ate away at her ageless beauty. I dreaded how much worse it had gotten since I last visited her a few weeks ago.
I found her in the sitting room, lounging over the chair next to her vintage radio. The room smelled of the dust that had collected since my last scheduled visit. She didn’t move, or acknowledge me, but she knew I was here. I had a view of her too-long dirt blonde hair flowing over the back of the chair. She rested her arm along the blood red suede, swaying her wrist in-time with the haunting melody. The black nightgown she had on was full of nostalgia for us both. She’d worn it a lot when we were together.
“Mistress,” I spoke. “I came to visit you before I left…”
She took a sip of her wine and said, “My home is atrocious. I wish you’d sent a missive ahead of time. You know how I so detest letting you see me like this.” After she set her glass down on the table, she sighed. “You’re not allowed to call me that anymore. We’ve known each other for over a decade, haven’t we? Call me by my name.”
“Lady Miranda,” I amended. She gestured for me to sit on the sofa in front of her. “My sister was kidnapped and trafficked to Elysium. I’m going to make sure she’s all right. Vespair told me you heard about the rest.”
“Ah, yes,” said Miranda, pouring me a glass of wine. “I heard the tale. You valiantly risked your career for a few dozen fresh-faced temple knights. I was at dinner with the Gremors having a wonderful time when the assembly turned violent. I worried for you. Vespair was in the middle of telling me about your sister when a messenger came crying about your fate. In typical Vespair fashion, she instructed me to wait here until she convinced you to visit me. I didn’t think you would listen to her. I assumed you would prioritize finding your sister over telling me in person that you would be gone for who knows how long.”
“I didn’t want you to worry too much about me,” I replied. “You haven’t been doing that well lately. I don’t want to add to that.”
Miranda chuckled. “Ever the charmer, aren’t we, Videl?” she teased. “And here I thought you came for more romantic pursuits. The Empyrean Palace is hosting their largest gathering at court next week. I had hoped that you wished to ask to be my date. After you find little Luna, of course.” I stared at her, not knowing what to say. I should have expected her to flirt with me, like she did every time. Mentally, I was so far-removed from our memories together. That didn’t make these moments any easier to bear. “A slave to your holy tenets, as always. Will you at least let me have a look at your back? I want to make sure your wounds will heal properly. That
Rin was too heavy-handed with you, no doubt…”
“I need a change of clothes,” I evaded. Miranda frowned, put-off by my matter-of-factness. “Is it all right if I look through my old wardrobe? I’ll be out of your way once I find something else to wear.”
Miranda waved her hand, dismissing me to look for what I needed. I wanted to apologize for hurting her feelings. I didn’t want to treat her this way. Her depression came from a mix of getting older and me not being around as often anymore. She had plenty of friends at court and endless topics to gossip about. That kept her happy enough. But she’d told me that I was the only one in this world she’d truly been able to confide in. Now she felt as if I’d left her behind for my ambition. Visiting her every now and then was all I could do to show her that I still cared.
I found an outfit she’d made me wear a lot years ago. A thin, short-sleeved jacket, a sleeveless shirt, leather pants and combat boots—all-black, to help me blend in. I stored my armor here, not trusting it to be safe if I left it at home. Being on indefinite leave meant my assets could have been seized at any time by the Holy Knights Thirteen. Once they found out that I was in Elysium, if they wanted to dismiss me without saying anything, all they had to do was take my home and all my belongings away. This suit of armor meant too much to me. Even if I lost my titles to corruption in the Excalibur, I wanted this to come home to once I knew my sister was safe.
After I said my goodbyes to Miranda, I found Vespair near the Charon Bridge leading down to Elysium. She’d warned me that the Empress was a crafty woman. Getting into Vassago wouldn’t have been straight-forward. There were certain privileges I had, and patterns I could take advantage of to get around that. From the bottom of my shaken faith, I prayed that I wouldn’t be too late.
Chapter Three
Black Waltz
(Raj)
It’s been damn amusing these past few days, watching Ser Videl scurry through my streets like a rat. From the way she moved, from all the hours she spent without sleep, without eating, I knew she was hell-bent on finding her sister—on finding me to bring her to her sister. She asked the locals for my whereabouts and found the least shoddy inns around to rest up. That was good and all, except I was paranoid. Ser Videl always knew just who to ask. She always knew exactly where to go. Anywhere I went with Satya and the gang, she was usually two steps behind me. How the hell was that possible? She ain’t never set foot down in this place her entire privileged, knightly life. All the twists and turns—every nook and cranny, every shortcut, every alleyway with the lowest chance of getting knifed and mugged, she knew them somehow. I lost count of how many times I’d be out somewhere, listening to the gossip about Kurtz’s plans for me, only to look down to the street below and see her marching through. I knew she really was an amateur because she never once looked up and saw me there.
Who the fuck told her how to get around down here? And why didn’t I know about this mystery person?
All of that seriously had me in a mood. I knew no one in my gang would betray me like this. This was the first time I started to question it. That on top of Kurtz talking shit about me—I had to blow off some steam. I only had two more days to come to some arrangement with him and Luna. I’d already made up my mind that I wasn’t putting the girl in any trouble for my sake. From what I could tell about Ser Videl, the way she stormed through Elysium looking for me, she probably would’ve had some…not-so-nice things to say to me if I did. I wasn’t scared of her, no. For some reason, I didn’t want to betray what little trust she had in me as it was. So, actually, I had two days to tell the guy in person that he could go fuck himself. I knew it’d come back to haunt me somehow. I didn’t want to face it yet.
That night, my bandits and me got all dolled up and went to a show down in the Negative Rumor. It was an odd part of town. During the day, you couldn’t go nowhere without hearing preachers shouting to the crowds, or bumping into folks with their noses stuck in the Holy Anathema. As soon as the church services were over for the night, the place lit up with parties, open bars, and clubs. Nothing too hardcore like over in the Fury’s Mercy. Just enough for the good church-going people to let their hair down after a long day of praying to God ahead of time to forgive them for their sins.
Once we got to the street the club was on, the place was packed. Cross-dressing nights on Fridays were the best there. I had on a boyish jacket, a pair of trousers, and a black bandana on. I felt weird in this compared to my usual sari. Didn’t have as much freedom to move around. I looked like a thug, too. Satya had on a male bard’s outfit—nothing too different from her other one, really. Hardly anyone recognized us until they saw my bandits. One of the little old ladies who lived near the club was surprised to see me like this. I smiled as she shooed her grandkids back in the house.
“Empress!” she said, shuffling over to me. “Oh, I barely knew it was you until I saw your eyes!”
I offered her my arm to hold. “Ah, yeah, it’s me,” I said. “Me and the gang are just headin’ over to the show down the street. You should get back inside, you know. Enjoy it before the real crowd gets here.”
“I can handle a little noise,” she replied. “I’m telling you—you look just like my nephew Penleigh! That smile, the way you hold yourself! Empress, why, if you decide to become a man, promise me you’ll tell me, will you? It has to be before a Sunday when we visit you. I should tell the children ahead of time! I don’t want them to be confused!”
“All right, Gran,” I promised, leading her back home. “If I ever decide to leave my days as a woman behind, I’ll be sure to send you a message.” Felt like I was humoring her more than anything. That was what you were supposed to do with people as old as she was. “Just so you know, I like my body the way it is. Doubt I’d dress like this for a living. It’s only for the show tonight. My Lady Nightingale’s performin’ there. I’ve gotta get in the spirit of the club to show my support. Bein’ in disguise is a nice perk, though.”
She chuckled in that way old ladies did. “You could dress as a man all you want, Empress,” she said, “But you wouldn’t lose that womanly face! The green of your eyes stands out like you wouldn’t believe.”
After we said our goodbyes, I thought over our brief talk. Satya teased me about what old Gran said, but there was some real meaning behind those words. I could hide all I wanted. Somewhere, somehow, someone would recognize me eventually. My eyes must have been the dead giveaway like Gran said. After what I’d given up to be here, I couldn’t imagine running away from it all. That conversation made me wonder about it—what it’d be like to be someplace where no one knew me. Somewhere I didn’t have to keep eyes along the back of my head. Where I could walk down the street alone, without my gang, and it wouldn’t be an invitation for some up-and-coming asshole to off me for my throne.
Once we were inside, I went straight to the bar. Satya was backstage with a few other bards, getting ready for the performance. The band would play some upbeat songs for a while. She said they’d change to something downtempo once Ser Videl was here, as a signal. I knew she wasn’t too far away. If I learned anything that night, Luna’s sister would recognize me even in this get-up. If she didn’t, that just meant I had to go up to her. I was curious to see how this would go down. I had no idea how to approach someone like her. All she cared about was her sister. I couldn’t imagine anything like, “Hey, how are you?” with her. No get-to-know-you talk. Just straight to business. Hell, I wanted to know who told her how to find me in the first place—if I should intimidate her into telling me before I brought her to Vassago. That…seemed like a stupid idea. Definitely not a good way to start a friendship. Or a partnership. Whoever her connections were, they were good at what they did. I wanted more information about them, but not at the risk of losing the middle-woman to my ego.
I thought it over as I drank my gin and tonic. This drink brought back memories from the past. As if I’d said the Devil’s name himself, my past came up to haunt me. I smelled her crisp, wooden col
ogne; heard her belts shifting as she walked, and the hard sounds of her heeled leather boots along the floor. She took a seat next to me at the bar. I didn’t look at her right away. I turned around to see where the hell her wife was. Nyte didn’t go nowhere without Mistress Fury holding her leash.
“I’m right here, Raj,” she said, staring at the alcohol bottles behind the bar. That velvety lesbian twang was still strong in her voice. “I need to talk to you about something.”
“Hello to you, too,” I scoffed. She didn’t even have on men’s clothes for the club. I bet her wife didn’t, either. “Just how am I doin’? I’m great, Nyte! I really am. Thanks so much for askin’. Makes me feel like you care about me after all these years. After all the great times we had together. After I—”
“—after you tossed me aside for your throne, I know,” she finished for me. I took a sip for the sake of keeping things awkward. I didn’t want her getting comfortable around me. Nyte sighed. “Raj, look—”
“Empress!” I corrected. “You fucking call me by my title just like everyone else! Only Satya gets special treatment from me. Not you. Not no more. We both know that I didn’t toss you nowhere. You wanted to go. You wanted me to give you up. So don’t sit here and pretend like I’m the monster!” Nyte couldn’t even look me in the eye. I faced her to drive my point home. “I spent all this time makin’ myself feel bad for givin’ you up. I worked hard to build this place from the ground-up, all to forget about you breakin’ my heart! I built these lies around me—that I was the power-hungry bitch, that I was some loveless hack, that I wasn’t built for commitment… Seein’ you again makes me realize how pathetic I was.”
Nyte fought hard to keep her cool. “I didn’t come here to argue with you,” she bit back.
