White Lies: (The Uruwashi Series #4)

by Christina Moore

  “I can work that contraption myself,” she said pointing to the car. “I can even take care of the men that try to stop me from driving it, but I rather keep you busy. Apparently even when your body has a task, your brain does not and goes off onto wild tangents. You’re needlessly making this harder for us both. So why don’t you keep your thoughts to yourself and just do as you’re told and this will all be over soon.”

  “With my death?” he whispered looking up at the sky. His lungs were on fire.

  “Death?” she chirped and then laughed, making him flinch. “Don’t be absurd.”

  Before he knew what was happening, the three-foot tall vampire was jerking him upright and helping him balance on his feet again.

  “I told you before, I won’t hurt you. I’m not supposed to—rather, not allowed. Honestly, I don’t have all that much interest in you anyway. Uruwashi or not. Maybe if you were full Uruwashi, but you’re not. You stink of something… else.”

  Tristan looked at her dumbly. He wasn’t sure what he was thinking but still, a name slipped from his lips. “Jason?”

  The vampire flinched and he wondered if he’d hit on something good.

  “How—Er, yes. Actually.”

  She looked flustered as she spun sharply and started to march off. Like she wasn’t supposed to answer but she couldn’t lie to him either.

  Tristan’s head hurt like he’d taken another hit from a practice sword, but he felt bolstered by the ground he’d gained.

  “He’s a pythia, isn’t he?” Wren had said as much.

  She hesitated again, but answered in a way he wasn’t expecting. Presumably, honestly. “Yes.”

  “Why? What’s he want with me? Who is he?”

  Xuejiao stopped, her head lowered and shoulders lifted. She’d said too much, Tristan could tell. And he knew she was deciding now if it was all worth it, saying too much. What did she have to lose? What could someone like her possibly lose?

  “You may find out just yet,” Xuejiao whispered, dropping her shoulders and left Tristan standing alone in the middle of the street as she returned to the car and got in.

  He looked up the street, the direction the man had been going. There was someone outside the izakaya now, looking around, maybe for the guy in the car and Tristan sighed to himself. He could admit he was intrigued by the vampire’s seeming honesty. And hopeful. Maybe she would tell him more.

  When was he ever hopeful?

  But it really seemed like Xuejiao wanted him to know what she knew. That she had plenty to say but couldn’t. If Tristan could stick it out long enough and not get himself killed trying to keep this kid alive, then maybe he’d get some useful info from his captor.

  It’d be a nice change of luck, anyway.

  Tristan got back in the car behind the wheel and sighed at the man passed out in the back with Juno curled up on top of him, purring happily. He would do everything he could to save this one. If he couldn’t, then he was going to lose his shit. Just how many people would die because he wasn’t strong enough? Both, physical and mental, he was starting to realize.

  Half an hour later, they were sitting outside a building that looked abandoned. It might have been a home once, but it looked more like a mechanic’s garage now.

  “Bring him inside, will you?” Xuejiao said before getting out of the car and shutting the door behind her.

  “Wait a minute!” Tristan shoved fat cat Juno into the passenger seat and got out, propping in his arms across the car roof and door. “I’m not helping you kill the poor bastard.”

  She stopped and turned to look at him and then huffed. “Fine. I’ll do it then.”

  Tristan moved to put himself between the car door and Xuejiao.

  The tiny vampire crossed her arms over her chest and glared up at him. “This is not a negotiation, Tristan. Move out of my way.”

  “No,” he said, standing firm. “I’m not going to let you hurt him.”

  “Do not make me use this,” Xuejiao said, lifting a tiny fist in the air. And it would have been comical if that hand wasn’t wreathed in lightning. That and the memory of being knocked on his ass more than once by a simple flick of her tiny hand was enough.

  Reluctantly, Tristan backed down, grumbling curses under his breath and making a very long mental list of all the ways he might kill the vampire when the time finally came.

  “Please don’t do this, Xuejiao.” He hadn’t tried simple politeness yet and figured it was a good last resort.

  The small vampire though didn’t think it was and pushed him aside with some ferocity. Tristan took a few steps away to let out some steam, feeling utterly helpless to the point of near insanity. Tristan lifted his face to the sky and screamed out his frustration. He knew what would happen now and there was no stopping it, no matter how determined he was.

  By the time he finished roaring and railing he was alone and he rushed off to find his tiny ward. He stopped inside the front door to take it all in. Maybe he was outside longer than he realized. In the time it took him to blow his top Xuejiao had stripped the man of his heavy coat, shoes and socks and had strung him upside down from a ceiling beam. His arms hung down against the side of his head and under him there was an old metal pail.

  “What’re you doing?” he asked, mortified.

  She looked up with the eyes an adult, old and cynical. She said nothing, turning her back on him and before he could comprehend the truth of that small hand swiping the air before her, it was too late. The man jerked but didn’t wake up—a small consolation, he supposed.

  Tristan was already moving forward, roaring. His first hit was a nice square punch to her face. She didn’t move, bother to try and avoid the hit and took it like a champ even if the impact knocked her tiny body off balance. She tumbled over backwards and twisted to land on her stomach.

  Tristan flinched, faltering at his own reaction, giving Xuejiao more than enough time for retribution. He never even saw her move, get to her feet and rush him, only that all the sudden his own feet were out from under him and he was in the air. He landed hard, smacking his head against the hard packed floor with a grunt. When the white spots cleared a few seconds later Xuejiao was standing over him looking haughty.

  “Why did you hesitate?”

  Tristan sighed, resigned to his defeat. “I’ve never hit a child before.” He’d surprised and scared himself.

  “And that is your first lesson… never trust your eyes.”

  “Yeah,” he sighed. “I know.”

  She harrumphed and moved away. He refused to turn his head as he heard the scrape of the bucket being moved. Fuck, the man was dead the moment Xuejiao laid eyes on him.

  “And what lesson am I supposed to learn with that man?”

  She marched past him, giving him a glimpse of her kimono and he gave into the urge to turn his head to watch her. She walked to the open door and stopped, turning to look back. “Come with me.”

  He huffed but pulled himself up. He hesitated, turning slowly to glance at the dead man. The coat he had had on was worn with a thick fake and ugly fur collar so Tristan had assumed he was just a punk kid but now, really looking at him, he realized that might have been wrong. Under that ratty coat the man had on a very nice suit, complete with a vest that was now lying in the dust. He was clean shaven and his hair was tidy and neat save for what gravity had undone for him. A businessman, just like the last one.

  Xuejiao lead them through the snow down a soft embankment. It was as they reached the bottom that Tristan realized there was a river. Xuejiao stopped, looked out over the landscape in some deep thought and then without ceremony or reason hefted the bucket and tossed the contents into the river.

  Tristan’s mouth dropped open as she considered the bucket for a moment and then tossed it in too before turning to walk back the way they came.

  “Wren told me you were practical, to a fault. That just now, that wasn’t practical. You just killed that man for nothing.” He frowned at his own words. Wouldn’t he have
said that same thing if the vampire drained the man to feed herself?

  “Not for nothing, no.”

  “Then why, because I don’t understand.”

  “Lesson two,” she said as she sat down right there at his feet and started to build a snow castle without actually touching the snow. “Never trust a vampire to do what you think they will.”

  He took a step back, not liking the extra tingling in his middle from her working her seikonō on the snow. “Seriously? You’re telling me? I knew that all too well without your little show.”

  She stopped and lifted her face. “Did you?”

  “Xuejiao, how much longer are we doing this?”

  She considered him for a long time.

  Finally, she said, “You must be getting hungry.”

  “Yeah, ‘cause watching a man die always works up my appetite.” Well, truth? Yeah, he was hungry but felt ashamed for it, like it was wrong to have mundane human needs when that guy just died. And he let it happen.

  “Lesson three,” she said as she stood and then kicked the castle. “Life goes on even if it ends for others.”

  Tristan scowled. “What the fuck? Why are we doing this? You may have been told not to hurt me but I’m still trying to hurt you. If you think you can trick me into not killing you or whatever, then think again, little sister. It’s nothing personal, but I do have to kill you.”

  A sad expression came over her. “I know you do, but you won’t.”

  “No one tells me what to do.”

  She shook her head, a cynical smile hardening her little mouth. “My fate’s already been decided. As has yours. My time will end soon enough but it won’t be by your hand. And when I die,” She smiled. “You’ll cry for me.”

  Tristan’s heart was racing, he could taste his own pulse and, for once, words were lost to him. She knew her end. Was it Jason who told her? Jesus, how could she just go on like this?

  “Come on, there’s a place we can stay in town.”

  Numb, Tristan stayed where he was, watching the child vampire march through the snow towards the car. He glanced through the open door of the building and could see the dead man. It was wrong to leave the man like that, strung like a slaughtered pig but he couldn’t bring himself to go back inside, to face his failure.

  “I’m a fucking coward,” he muttered and joined his abductor in the car.

  Despite his misgivings, Tristan ate. He’d been too long without a good meal now and felt sick for it. Afterward, when he’d had his fill and then some, he felt sick again, a combination of eating too much too quickly and the weight of guilt like a lead brick in his stomach.

  Soon, it didn’t matter though because Xuejiao took two more victims that night, a woman and her son. The boy, barely ten, got a quick death as Xuejiao beheaded him with a razor of wind and electricity. But the woman, she wasn’t so lucky.

  Xuejiao spent the better part of the night that was left sexually assaulting and torturing the woman. Tristan tried to stop her, but got nothing for his troubles but a broken finger, a sprained knee and a bloodied nose. When Xuejiao had enough of him, she tied him up and left him in a lump in the corner, forced to endure.

  Finally defeated in mind and body, he lay on the ground next to a puddle of his own puke listening to the sounds of Xuejiao dismembering the bodies by hand. His mind was utterly empty; he was numb all over. It had all been too much and he knew that if he had go through that again, he would have to be committed. He’d never thought of himself as weak, not truly, but now he was realizing his limits were much lower than he’d so confidently relied on.

  All of the sudden her face came to him and he groaned, rolling to his side, putting the gore behind him. Ash, where was she? Was she close to finding him or was she as utterly lost as he was? Surely Lilith had to have told her where he was. There was no way Lilith didn’t know… And yet, if that was true, why was he allowed to wallow in this misery? Was she being ordered by this mysterious Jason too?

  “I’m not doing all this just to kill you, Tristan.” Xuejiao’s voice sounded condescending.

  Tristan curled up tighter, shutting his eyes. “You already have,” he croaked out as his body warmed. He was on the verge of tears, surprised by their sudden appearance but unwilling to stop them.

  “Oh, don’t be so melodramatic.”

  “Fuck you.”

  The little vampire harrumphed and he stiffened when he felt her moving towards him. That’s when it occurred to him that it could have been worse. He felt her like a vampire, but not the way he felt Innokentiy when the man wasn’t bothering to mask is presence. She could have made him feel every single emotion she felt as she mutilated, instead she remained a calm, constant, dull hum to him.

  “I’m only doing what must happen.”

  Tristan said nothing and Xuejiao came around to sit in front of him. She waited patiently, silently, until he opened his eyes. She didn’t smile but there was something close to one in her eyes. “Can I tell you a truth?”

  He snorted, shutting his eyes and turning his face into his arm to hide. “Like I’ll believe a thing you tell me.” Well, maybe he has. That was the trouble.

  “Wren was right about me when he said I was practical. I am.”

  Tristan lifted a single eye out from behind his arm to peek at her.

  “Yes, I was told to do this but, well, I suppose I’m a bit like you.”

  He felt disgust and she smiled, knowing so.

  “I’m hardheaded too. The First Pythia, Jason…”

  Tristan lifted his head to look at her fully now, eyes wide, lips parted. Holy shit, this Jason fellow was… is Lilith’s father?

  She smiled knowingly. “He has something of mine. Something I want back. That’s the only reason I’m being forced into this ridiculous charade.”

  Her words felt true and Tristan shifted to sit. Realizing he was too stiff he relaxed again but kept eye contact with her. “Then let me help you,” he whispered, wondering what in the hell he was doing and unable to stop himself. “Stop doing this, stop hurting people and let me help you get it back!”

  Xuejiao laughed, a soft, gentle laugh that Tristan wanted to believe. But he’d seen the devil in her and knew she wasn’t the little girl she so successfully emulated. He might never look at any child the same after this.

  “Don’t be naïve, Tristan. I know you’re desperate but this is how it has to be.”

  He frowned, realizing what she was saying. “You’re going to keep killing and making me watch.”

  “Yes,” she said grimly.

  “But why!” he yelled, feeling at a loss. He wasn’t that useless and if they did team up, they could recruit others to help. Make a show of force against Jason and stop the manipulation once and for all, for everyone. It made so much more sense than falling into his scheme.

  “Yes,” Xuejiao said sadly. “It does.” She looked away for the first time since they’d crossed paths. It was a reaction of shame. “It’s just the way it has to be.”

  “But why? He asked again, feeling impudent and bratty and lost.

  Again she laughed softly and stood. “We’ll call it… equivalent exchange. Yes, I think that’s the term he used.”

  Tristan shut his eyes as the nausea threatened again. They shot open again when he felt the ropes on his hand split open.

  “You’re just a pawn,” he said sounding disappointed. “Just like the others, nothing but a complacent pawn.”

  She smiled at him, it was a little condescending behind sad. “We’re all pawns in life, dear boy.”

  “Ugh,” he made the rude noise and stood, wobbling unsteadily to his feet. He was going to puke again, knew it with a certainty but he had things to say first. “I don’t need philosophical bullshit, I need answers.”

  She nodded, straining her neck to look up at him from her spot still seated on the floor. “And you will get them. Soon, I suspect. Just not from me. Maybe not even from our mysterious Lord.”

  He made a rude noise, turning a
way only to snap back around a second later. That second was all he needed for his sudden anger to be utterly squashed under the new rush of nausea he felt at seeing the mess the girl made. He shut his eyes tight for a moment, trying to think and not remember the bloody chaos he’d just seen.

  “Then what’s the fucking point of making me suffer like this? Just to prove that I’m weak, that I’m wrong, what I’m… I’m fucked? Learn to let go? What? What is it I’m supposed to learn from what you do?”

  She stood with a sigh. When she got her to feet, she looked up at him and shrugged. “Whatever you make of it.” She shrugged again. “I’m not a pythia, I don’t know the future. Not yours anyway.”

  He stared at her a moment and then in his lower, darker tone, the one he remembered talking to Lucien in once but the words were gone to him now, he said, “But you know yours. Your end.”

  “Yes.”

  “So do I,” he answered confidently.

  She smiled a smile that wasn’t expected and did something even more unexpected as she extended her arm. Tristan balked at the gore covered knife she was offering him but took it and turned it on her.

  “Can you?” she asked, smile slipping into a frown. “Can you kill me?”

  He looked down at the knife.

  “I’m just a little girl. But I’m a bad, bad vampire. I won’t stop you. So do it. Kill me now. I’ll even help.” She grabbed his hand and pushed the knife against her chest. “Stab me here, hard. Crush through my ribs and destroy my heart. Cut off my head and burn it.”

  He looked up, startled. He couldn’t explain why exactly, maybe it was her pushing her will on him but he believed her. She would stand there and let him stab her, kill her.

  “Can you?” she challenged again.

  He took in a shaky breath and answered honestly. “No. But I’m getting closer.”

  She smiled darkly. “Good.”

  20: My Own Prison

  IT seemed like someone was whispering to him and Tristan woke with a jolt. Alone, he was alone, but felt as if there was someone else very close to him. Was it the shinigami Xuejiao claimed was following him that he felt?