White Lies: (The Uruwashi Series #4)

by Christina Moore

  Tristan took in a deep breath to give her his explicative laced opinion but she was already gone. He lay breathless for a moment in the snow, staring up at the dark sky and listening to the sounds of Xuejiao protesting her defeat. There were no thoughts, he couldn’t possibly think right now and on instinct he moved. He got up and trudged through the snow back the way he came.

  23: Fell on Black Days

  ONLY five remained. Everyone else was dead or fled. Xuejiao was on her knees, chained to spikes that looked like they were meant to hold a dinosaur. Audric stood off to the side with a very obvious broken arm but with his subordinates nowhere in sight, dead or alive, he wasn’t asking the other Masters for help in putting it back the way it was supposed to be.

  Yuki was frowning down at the child vampire, looking like she wanted to say something but had too much pride to. Innokentiy comforted Tegwen as she cried softly over one of the bodies. The Viking met eyes with Tristan and motioned with a nod.

  Not that Tristan’s attention needed to be steered away because she stood out like a light in the dark, a human amongst alabaster and stone. “Ash?” Tristan warbled.

  She flinched from her place overlooking Xuejiao and looked up, dropping her arms and the scowl. Her cape was gone and her clothes were torn but otherwise she looked okay. She made a little noise and then was standing before Tristan.

  “Are you okay?” she asked, pawing desperately at him.

  He grabbed her wrists pulling them to his chest to keep her focused. He looked at Xuejiao then back to Ash. “This is it then, isn’t it?”

  Ash’s concern for him shifted into a regretful frown and she nodded. “It is done,” she said softly, turning to look at the child vampire.

  Xuejiao had stopped wailing and was simply watching now, her attention focused sharply on Tristan. Did she know, had she felt her sister here?

  He dropped to his knees before Ash with a grunt. “You haven’t killed her.”

  Ash exchanged a look with Audric. The other vampire huffed and turned his back on them, walking away. “I refuse to witness any further than this, make the Uruwashi do it.”

  “Witness wha—” Tristan tried to ask.

  “I agree,” Tegwen said as she stood, wiping the blood tears from her face. “As the eldest here, I appoint the Uruwashi to bear witness. Asta of Earth, you are bound to him, do with that as you wish.”

  “You’re all cowards,” Ash hissed as the two walked away.

  Audric left with some parting words in French, but Tristan couldn’t discern in anyway what they meant with the empty tone they were delivered. Tegwen laughed and then both Masters were gone, having used their enhanced speed to disappear. They were alone now in the field. Tristan knew that others had died here tonight, felt the memory of their empty presences, but didn’t know who they were or where their bodies might be.

  “I will stand with you, friends,” Innokentiy said as he came over to them. “My family.”

  “What the fuck is going on?” Tristan snapped. “What am I supposed to witness?”

  Ash looked down at him for a long moment with her lips twisted and then moved aside so that he could see the vampire behind her. “Her death.”

  “Her death? But the others just lef—oh no. No, no, no, no, no.” He leaned back, shaking his head, but damned if he could get to his feet again and move away. “No. That’s not right.”

  Tristan learned a lot about vampires in Greece from his Uruwashi brother, but even long before and plenty afterwards, there was one thing he understood very clearly about the race. That a sun death was the worst death they could endure. And now, now he was supposed to stand watch? Watch a child burn alive? Fuck that noise.

  “It is our only recourse,” Ash answered in a soft tone as she lowered to her knees before him. “We barely trapped her.”

  Tristan met eyes with the child vampire and frowned. She was chained like an animal and would die in the worst possible way. “No,” he said adamantly. He wouldn’t do this. He wouldn’t let them kill her like this.

  “She’s right,” Xuejiao called out to him. “There’s only one true way to kill someone like me and that’s to burn me alive. I’m just too old. Sure, you can take off my head, and maybe you should, because I will fight when the pain comes on. But I’ll still be alive, inside my head, trapped, smoldering and in pain.” She let out a curt laugh. “Even a pythia couldn’t kill me now. I can’t even leave myself out in the sun because my instincts will always save me, regardless of my will.”

  “I can’t do this,” Tristan muttered through trembling lips and dropped his chin to his chest. The first tear slipped down his cheek and into his mouth, the saltiness of it surprising him. Was he really crying? Fucking, again?

  He touched his face and came away with wet fingers. As he was looking numbly at his hand, another came into view to take it. He looked past their joined hands into Ash’s face. She wore a smile for him but it was sad and full of pain. She hurt for him and he felt the tears swell again.

  “I am so sorry,” she said gently, pulling him to her. He went to her stiffly but then relaxed when her cool hand smoothed the hair from his face. Despite the chill of her flesh, he still found comfort in her touch, in the love he felt from such small contact.

  “I cannot stay with you for this. I want to. I need to be here for you but it’s…” She licked her lips carefully and looked back. “But it appears you will not be alone.”

  As he was contemplating her words, he felt someone move up next to him and when he looked and saw the woman at his side he let out a bit of a yelp, flinching away. The question in his wide eyes as they met Ash’s made the vampire sigh. She said nothing and helped him to his feet. He wobbled but managed to stay upright.

  “Li—Liith?!” he stuttered.

  This was no child though. The woman, obviously blind, turned her head towards him and nodded once. She was tall, at least four inches taller than Ash, and thin, her hair thick waves of chocolate brown down to her waist. Her facial features were so much like Ash’s that it was uncanny, only Lilith’s face was a bit longer and her jaw was cut a big squarer.

  Her lips were nearly the same shape as Ash’s, pouty with that little corner turn down that Tristan found so sexy and she wore a deep red lipstick. Instead of her normal scrap of black cotton over her missing eyes, she wore an elegant ribbon of deep blue lace that coordinated with her heavy gothic dress of lace and satin.

  When he’d last saw her, from his place in Ash’s mind, she was rather pregnant in her child form. In this taller, adult form, there was a nearly indiscernible bump. God, he thought as he met Ash’s unsurprised gaze, he had so much to talk to her about. How was she so composed when his world seemed to falling apart around him.

  Whether Lilith sensed his shock or just expected it, she smiled ever so slightly, a sly sort of smile, and slipped off the cape that she was wearing. The color was a deep turquoise, rich and luxurious velvet with satin lining.

  “Thank you,” Ash said softly and took the cape.

  “Ash,” Tristan whispered. She forced a smile and came to him. She slipped cool fingers behind his neck and pulled him down for a kiss, soft and gentle.

  She licked her own lips and looked confused for a moment as if tasting something she didn’t expect but then squeezed his hand. “I shall see you soon.”

  “How are you so calm right now?”

  She only smiled and answered him with a soft but honest, “I love you and I’m proud of you.”

  He caught Innokentiy’s eye around Ash as she put her back to him and the vampire nodded, a stern look on his face that said, “I know you can do it.”

  Tristan stood dumbfounded, watching the vampires quickly march across the field cowering from the first rays of sunlight. As they disappeared down the snowy slope a sense of deep apathy settled in. There was no cold, no anger, no hope, no fear, no nothing. He was here and nothing could change that now.

  Lilith took his hand and somehow, it felt right. A comfort, actually. B
ut she knew, didn’t she? She knew everything.

  “She’s right,” Xuejiao suddenly said, startling Tristan.

  “What?” he called back across the vast space separating them.

  “Lilith, she says this is how it has to be. She’s right.”

  He frowned at Xuejiao. “Did you know?”

  The little vampire didn’t even try to hide her meaningful smile.

  Lilith let his hand go before he could pull away and he marched out across the field. Tristan came to a stop close to Xuejiao and dropped to his knees in the snow before her, bowing his head. “I know I don’t have any right to ask because I’m—I have to know… Do you know, is it really Jason that’s pulling my strings?”

  Because, let’s face it, he had no control of his own life anymore.

  Chains rattled and then Xuejiao’s tiny, cold hand was pressed on the top of Tristan’s bowed head.

  “You don’t think I’m a monster anymore?”

  “No, you’re a monster, but this? This is wrong.”

  The chains clanked softly. “Why?”

  He shook his head, the weight of her tiny hand as heavy as the weight on his chest. “It just is.”

  “You’re a good man, Tristan. But you can’t let the burden of death bring you to your knees, you’re stronger than this.”

  A sob burst out of him and he shook his head again. “I’m really not.”

  “This was your lesson.”

  He looked up and met her cold gaze. “What?”

  “If I couldn’t break you, if my death doesn’t break you then you’ll know…”

  Numb, he only stared. Then it hit him and his eyes widened. “N—no. It’s—” He felt the heat of anger giving him new life, a reason to rally. “It’s not even the same thing! Jesus.”

  “Of course it is.”

  At a loss he only shook his head. How was it even close to the same thing? That him sitting here like a fucking coward and letting the others of her kind put her out to sun was somehow the same as Tristan purposefully hunting down and killing pregnant shinwa and heikō.

  He lowered his head and let a sob out. He was crying heavy tears now, unashamed and broken inside.

  “What did my sister say to you?”

  Tristan’s head jerked up so fast the tears flicked off his face. “How did—Amunet told me that your Master wants to meet me.”

  Xuejiao’s eyes widened. “Apos is awake?”

  He nodded, his face slack in shock. “I woke him.” And still he didn’t have a clue what he’d done to Lucien. Was his fear of the unknown greater than his fear of the truth?

  The little vampire wiggled under a shiver that echoed in her chains as she whispered under her breath in what could only be Chinese.

  “Xuejiao?”

  “You should go to him.” The look on her face said she was surprised at her own words. “He might—He can help you.” She nodded as if she was trying to convince herself.

  “Or kill me,” he snorted, laughing a little. He wasn’t sure why it was funny. Maybe it was the idea that the first of vampire kind actually wouldn’t kill him on sight. Was he really that interesting, that special? Was he kin? “Amunet warned me to stay away from him.”

  “Did she?” the little girl chirped in surprise. “Then you must go see him.”

  The vampire’s entire body shuddered hard. Her eyes shut in pain and bowed her head. “It’s nearly time,” Xuejiao whispered. Distantly, Tristan was aware of the sun but not the way the vampire was as she uncontrollably fidgeted, clanking her chains.

  “Xuejiao! You have to tell me, everything. You know what’s happening, don’t you? You must!”

  “You really are a good boy, for an Uruwashi, but I must keep my promises, even in the face of death.”

  He nodded, lowering his head. He sat quite for a moment, hoping for it all to magically make sense. “I’m sorry you’re going to die like this… I can, will you let me put you out of your misery now?”

  “What are you saying?” she asked but the look on her face said she understood clearly. Not that Tristan was hiding anything from her, he’d long ago lost his ability to hold onto his mental block. His mind had been an open book to her for days. And the print was large enough that even the most ailing of eyes could see it.

  “I—shit.” Shaking his head, he bowed again. “I don’t even have a weapon.” He’d lost his kitchen knife somewhere along the way and who knew where Xuejiao had left that back-up katana.

  A hand suddenly landed on his shoulder and he gasped, jerking straight. “Lilith?” He hadn’t heard or felt her approach.

  In the pythia’s hand was Murasaki Kaeru, Ash’s prized sword. He couldn’t believe Ash would have willingly parted with it and didn’t remember her passing it off before she left.

  Tristan sniffled and swiped at his tears, standing. Determined to get his shit together he pulled the katana from its saya. Knowing how precious the sword and sheath was to Ash, he handed the hand-painted saya to Lilith.

  “Please, Xuejiao, let me do this. I know it won’t be a full death for you but it has to lessen some of the pain.” He hoped.

  She looked up, her complexion a sickly shade of white now. Under her eyes were dark with circles and the veins in her face were starting to show in bright blue ribbons. “And after I tortured you?”

  Tristan shook his head. “I get it now. I know what you were trying to show me—teach me. But I don’t…” He swallowed past the lump in his throat. Oh Christ, he was going to cry again.

  “You can.”

  He snorted a laugh. “Jesus, I don’t need you fucking trying to encourage me to kill.”

  She smiled, making an obvious fight against the pain of the sun. “I was ready for this. Besides, I’ll get to see the sun again after over three millennia, it’s all any of us ever want.”

  Tristan’s shoulders dropped. “Are you sure?”

  “I already told you, you won’t kill me. And see, you’ve cried for me too. I told you that you would.”

  He laughed but he felt the rise of those fucking tears again. God, what a mess. He took the sheath from Lilith and pushed the blade back inside. “I cry because I’m weak, and you’ve broken me.”

  “No, dear. You’re very much the opposite of weak and far from broken. You have too far to go before you’re allowed to break.”

  “But what is it? What am I supposed to be? I can’t go on like this, not knowing, not understanding…. Fuck, it’s like an overbearing parent that dictates down to breathing on what their child should do.”

  “You’re closer than you think. The answers are slowly making their way towards you, your time of convergence is very soon—perhaps in time to stop Mother.”

  Tristan’s body stiffened at the mention of his, as he understood it, ultimate enemy. “Xuejiao…”

  The vampire sighed, shutting her eyes. That’s when Tristan noticed the blood slowly seeping out of her eyes, nose, mouth and ears. The burn, it started on the inside long before the sun broke horizon and now that was moments away and once the light of sun touched the vampire’s flesh there was no stopping the destruction.

  “She’s…Ah, I’m, I’m saying too much now. The sun, it boils the mind, I’m not sure what I’m saying.”

  “Xuejiao, please, I need to know.”

  “I’m sorry, dear Uruwashi, but rest assured that the truth is not far. Just hang in there, hold onto your strength, the power you hold within you, and those who love you. Never would I have ever guessed a single Uruwashi would have such a large command of loyal followers.”

  “Followers? What followers?”

  “Ash, Desmond, Yukihime, Innokentiy. Lilith here, perhaps even Audric and Balian to a point, they all trust in you and your plight.”

  “A plight we don’t know shit about!”

  Xuejiao smiled a real smile, her first since being caught. “There you go, feeling more like yourself again. See, you’ll be fine. You’re young and bounce back so resiliently. And with your crew, nothing can go w
rong now.”

  He let out a heavy sigh. “You’re insane, you know that?”

  She smiled sadly and fluttered her hand at him to back away. “Now go back or you’ll get burnt or breath me in and trust me, you don’t want that.”

  He hefted the sword one last time, weighting it. He wasn’t particularly good with it, not like Ash, but he wasn’t down right terrible either. He could ease the child’s pain; seconds, that’s all it took.

  “Seconds,” Xuejiao whispered, “And a new burden to bear.”

  “Yes,” he said softly. “A burden I can and will take because it’s the right thing to do.”

  She laughed. “Oh, it’s a shame I hadn’t a chance to know you in another circumstance, we might have been friends.”

  Tristan smiled sadly. “Maybe.” He moved back a step, getting ready to make a quick retreat. The vampire may have been a warrior because she was doing a bang up job of pretending that her face wasn’t steaming. “You are sort of a crazy shit though.”

  She smiled all fang; they were grey and speckled like dried out bone. “You like crazy.”

  “Yeah,” he said with a laugh, “I guess I do.”

  She took in a deep, deep breath, shutting her eyes and let it out slowly, shaking. “It’s time. Tristan.” He moved to say something but she snapped at him. “Go. Step back. Now!”

  Seeing the urgency in her eyes, he scrambled back only to fall to his ass. His knee had finally given out. Lilith came to him and helped him up, guiding them back to a safe distance. He couldn’t see Xuejiao, but he felt her, the fire of her presence and only when he was nearly a football field away, just on the fringe of his ability to feel her, did he stop. He turned to watch, surprised to see so much smoke.

  Even from this far he could hear Xuejiao’s defiant grunts. The vampire refused to cry out but as the dark ash that tunneled upwards increased, the clank of her chains got louder and louder as she thrashed until she finally gave herself over to the pain and the first wail cut through the dawn.

  She might have meant to hold her mental abilities back but the other vampires, hidden away in their dark places, they felt the push of her voice, the immensity of her seikonō and it took the breath from Tristan as a sheet of ice and lighting burst outward from the child. Even in her pain, she managed to control herself enough to ensure Tristan’s safety, making sure none of the lethal seikonō touched him.