Don't Want To Miss A Thing

by Mansell, Jill

  Especially to Australia.

  At ten to five a car drew up outside. Matt climbed out of the driver’s seat, well over six feet tall and broad shouldered, wearing a plain T-shirt and jeans. Not particularly good looking but not bad looking either, just average. Mid-brown hair, fairish freckled skin, no immediate resemblance to Delphi – but then, with her dark hair and eyes, Delphi took after Laura; appearance-wise she was all Yates.

  Dex mentally braced himself; this was like all the times in the past when he’d lied to the girls in his life, only a million times more important. OK, here we go . . .

  ‘Dexter. Thanks for seeing me.’ Matt shook his hand and said, ‘I just can’t get over it. What a shock. I couldn’t believe it when Phyllis told me about Laura. Such a tragedy. And then to hear about the baby . . .’

  ‘Yes. Come in.’ Having left George fast asleep in the living room, Dex led Matt into the kitchen and switched on the coffee machine. ‘When did you leave for Australia?’

  ‘Just under two years ago. I’ve been working on a cattle station in the outback. In Queensland. I’m not the greatest at keeping in touch with people at the best of times . . . but if I’d known she was pregnant . . . well, oh Jesus, I had no idea . . .’

  ‘But if Laura had wanted you to know, she could have found a way to contact you. She was just happy to be a mum. It’s all she ever wanted. She was such a great mother,’ said Dex. ‘And Delphi’s fine. She’s fantastic, doing really well. She’s changed my life. I love her, I’m her legal guardian, the adoption’s going ahead, it’s all on track, she’s calling me Dada . . . as far as Delphi’s concerned, I’m her father—’

  ‘Right. Can I see her?’ Matt was giving him an odd look.

  ‘Of course you can.’ Dex realised he’d said too much too fast, so desperate was he to stake his claim. ‘She’s asleep. Come on through.’

  At the sound of the door opening, George opened his pale blue eyes. He looked more than ever like a baby hippo in drag. Overcome with emotion, Matt gazed at him in silence and covered his mouth with his hand.

  ‘Delphi. Come here, sweetheart. Come to Daddy!’ God, it felt weird, saying the words to George. Reaching down, Dex scooped him up into his arms. ‘There’s a good girl. And look, someone’s here to see you!’

  A ribbon of shiny drool dangled from George’s bottom lip and Dex left it there; the only saliva he didn’t mind cleaning up was Delphi’s.

  ‘Here she is, then.’ Swinging round to Matt, he said, ‘This is Delphi.’

  George blinked and dribbled a bit more as he stared blankly at Matt.

  Matt stared back for several seconds. The ribbon of drool lengthened, like a minature silver bungee.

  Dex held his breath.

  At last Matt said evenly, ‘I don’t know what’s going on here, but this isn’t Delphi.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘It’s not Delphi.’ He shook his head.

  ‘Yes it is.’

  ‘Oh come on.’ Matt took out his phone, pressed some buttons and held it up so Dex could see the photograph on the screen.

  Shit. When had that been taken? Just a few weeks before Laura’s death, presumably. There was Phyllis sitting on her pristine pale blue sofa, proudly holding Delphi on her lap.

  Beautiful elfin-featured Delphi, with her sparkling dark eyes, delicate cheekbones and irresistible beaming smile.

  Phyllis had evidently – oh so helpfully – shown Matt her precious framed photograph and he’d taken a picture of it.

  Dex felt sick. So much for their grand plan. What was going to happen now?

  ‘Who’s this?’ Matt pointed at George.

  ‘He belongs to a friend.’

  ‘He?’ His eyes widening in disbelief, Matt said, ‘So where’s Delphi?’

  ‘She’s . . . next door.’

  ‘Am I allowed to ask why?’

  ‘Because she means everything in the world to me,’ said Dex, ‘and I panicked, I couldn’t bear to lose her. The thought of someone turning up out of the blue and staking a claim, taking her away . . .’ His throat tightened at the prospect, ‘Well, it’s enough to make you do something desperate. So we did.’

  ‘Right.’ Matt nodded thoughtfully. ‘I can see that it would. But I’d like to see the real Delphi now, if that’s all right with you. By the way,’ he added as Dex turned to leave, ‘if that means you think I’m her father, I’m not.’

  Molly and Delphi were on the floor building a tower of wooden blocks when the doorbell began to ring.

  And ring and ring and rrringgggggg.

  Her heart leaping with terror, Molly jumped up and pulled the front door open. She’d never seen Dex looking so happy. Wasting no time, he said, ‘It’s OK, everything’s fine, he’s not the dad.’

  ‘WAAAAH!’ Her shriek of relief would have been ear-splitting had it not been muffled by Dex flinging his arms round her. All the pent-up fear dissipated in a whoosh of release as they clung to each other. Then Molly pulled back in order to look at him and they both began to laugh.

  ‘All that worry,’ she told Dex, ‘for nothing. No one’s taking Delphi away from you.’ Whoops, for a split second there she’d almost said us.

  ‘I know.’ He was shaking his head in wonder. ‘I still can’t believe it. Come here.’ And he was hugging her again, too overcome with relief to speak. The next moment, somehow, they were kissing. It just felt so natural, so right, his warm mouth on hers—

  ‘DadaDA!’ Having crawled across the hallway, Delphi clung to the leg of Molly’s jeans in order to pull herself to her feet. Tugging energetically at the hem of her shirt, she demanded to be lifted up and allowed to join in. ‘DadaDADADA.’

  Since what was carrying on over her head clearly wasn’t a good idea, it was a timely intervention. Molly picked her up, planted a big kiss on Delphi’s cheek then passed her over to Dex who did the same.

  ‘Oh, my baby girl.’ For a moment his eyes swam as he hugged her to him and was rewarded with a poke in the ear. ‘Ow.’

  ‘Bladada.’ By way of apology, Delphi stretched out her delicate hand and trustingly stroked his cheek.

  ‘I love you too,’ Dex murmured, before collecting himself. ‘Come on, let’s go. Matt’s waiting for us. I left him in charge of Transvestite George and I don’t know which of them’s more scared.’

  ‘Now I can see it.’ Matt held out an index finger and watched as Delphi grasped it. ‘My God, she looks just like Laura. Those eyes.’ He turned back to Dex. ‘She looks like you too.’

  In a corner of the living room, Molly changed an uncomplaining George out of the dress and girly accessories and turned him back into a boy. She stayed out of the conversation as Dex took Matt through the details of Laura’s sickeningly sudden death.

  Then it was Matt’s turn to explain his and Laura’s relationship. ‘We worked together years ago and stayed friends afterwards. It was mainly thanks to Laura we kept in touch. I’m not brilliant at that sort of thing.’ He pulled an embarrassed man-face. ‘But we always picked up where we’d left off. Laura was great. We got on really well, enjoyed catching up with each other’s lives. It was a platonic relationship.’ He paused. ‘Then a few years back, Laura talked about wanting children and not having any luck with finding herself a man. She asked me if I’d help her out.’

  Dex had gone very still. ‘In what way?’

  ‘In the way friends do. You know what I’m talking about,’ said Matt. ‘Laura was happy to take the responsibility and be a single mother. She just wanted a donor to . . . well, donate.’

  ‘When was this?’ said Dex.

  ‘Four years ago. We tried for a few months, but it never did happen.’ Matt shook his head. ‘Poor Laura, she was disappointed, she’d been desperate for her wish to come true. But then I was offered a job in Alaska, so that was that. I was out there for a year. When I came back we met up, but didn’t . . . you know. I’d started seeing this other girl so it wouldn’t have been appropriate. And then not long after that I went out to Australia. W
hen you’re living that kind of life, it’s easy to lose touch with friends. Before you know it, they’ve moved on. I lost my phone with all the numbers in it . . . I just assumed everyone else was as busy as I was.’ He paused, lost in thought. ‘You tell yourself you’ll catch up at some stage, whenever you get back. I finally came home last week and thought it would be great to see Laura again. Didn’t have her number any more, so I just turned up on the off chance at the house. But the door was answered by a teenage boy who hardly spoke any English. I thought Laura must have moved away, and knew she’d always been friendly with Phyllis next door. So I went to ask her where Laura was living now.’ He stopped abruptly, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. ‘I couldn’t believe it when she told me what had happened. Couldn’t believe it.’ He rubbed a hand across his forehead. ‘Still can’t. Laura was such a good person.’

  ‘I know.’ Dex nodded. ‘She was.’

  ‘And then Phyllis started talking about Delphi. Well, you can understand why I was shocked. Pleased in one way, because it meant Laura had had the baby she was so desperate for. And devastated because she’d died, leaving Delphi without a mother. So if you thought I was the father,’ Matt went on, ‘that means you have no idea who it is.’ This had evidently only just occurred to him.

  ‘None at all. A one-off, Laura told me. Anyway, I’m adopting her.’ Dex was firm. ‘Right now, I’m her uncle. But I’m going to be her dad.’

  ‘Wow. That was the other shock.’ Matt shook his head. ‘When Phyllis told me who was taking care of Delphi now.’

  ‘What does that mean?’

  ‘Well, I know we’ve never met before, but Laura used to talk about you.’ Grimacing apologetically, Matt said, ‘No offence, but she told me what you were like.’

  From the other side of the living room, Molly watched and wondered how Dex would react to this less than complimentary observation.

  ‘It’s OK.’ Delphi was attempting to take off his watch; Dex unclipped it and fastened it around her ankle, currently her favourite place to wear several thousand pounds’ worth of Switzerland’s finest. ‘I used to be a complete . . . idiot.’ Now that Delphi had begun imitating sounds, he was having to learn to censor himself. ‘And I never imagined I could do this. The first time I talked properly to Molly was just after Laura died.’ He glanced over at her as he spoke, and a lump sprang into her throat at the memory of that night. ‘I told her I couldn’t do it, that there was no way I could look after a baby.’ He paused, a world of emotion in his eyes as he held her gaze for a long moment. ‘She was the one who told me I could.’

  ‘And I was right,’ said Molly. Mustn’t cry, mustn’t cry.

  ‘Eventually. Well, not even that. One day at a time,’ said Dex. ‘But we’re getting there. And I’m doing something I never thought I could do. Delphi’s changed my life and I had no idea it was possible to feel this way about someone who can’t even speak. She just means everything in the world to me. Sorry, I know it sounds pukey. I’m not used to talking like this.’ He leaned forward and waggled Delphi’s bare foot with the oversized Breitling watch dangling from her ankle. ‘I just love her so much.’

  ‘Has she turned you into a better person?’ said Matt.

  Dex shrugged. ‘I don’t know about that. I hope so.’

  Matt turned to Molly. ‘Is he?’

  She nodded. ‘Yes.’

  ‘Well. That would make Laura very happy,’ said Matt.

  Dex nodded. ‘It would. And she was the one who wanted me to be Delphi’s guardian.’ With a brief smile he dropped a kiss on Delphi’s tangled dark curls. ‘My big sister always did like to think she knew best.’

  Molly left Dex and Matt sharing their memories of Laura. As she carried George on her hip across the village green, she said, ‘And don’t tell your mum about the dressing up, OK? It’s our secret.’

  ‘Here he is!’ Greeting them at the door, Tina took George from her and smothered him in kisses. ‘The prodigal son, home again. Did he behave himself?’

  ‘Good as gold,’ said Molly.

  ‘He always is. And how did the assessment go with the social worker?’

  Tiny fibs weren’t too terrible, were they? ‘It went well. Fingers crossed, everything’s going to be fine.’

  Tina looked pleased. ‘Ah, I hope so, I really do. Dex deserves it. We were only talking about him yesterday, me and the other mums at the school gate.’

  ‘Oh?’ Molly smiled, picturing the scene. Of course the other mothers would discuss Dex; he was the most enthralling addition to Briarwood in years.

  ‘Yes! We were saying it’s just like one of those Hollywood romcoms, you know the kind. Handsome Jack-the-lad giving up the city high life and moving to the sticks to look after a baby.’ Her eyes dancing, Tina said, ‘And to begin with he doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing and all sorts of things go wrong, but after a while it gets better . . . and then he ends up getting together with the girl who helped him through it!’

  ‘Oh gosh.’ Crikey. Molly felt herself growing pink at the thought of all those people at the school gate gossiping about her and Dex.

  ‘And there are setbacks along the way, of course there are, because you always have to have setbacks in movies like that. But everyone knows they’re perfect for each other and the whole village is rooting for them . . . and then in the end something really romantic happens and that’s when they realise it’s proper love and happy-ever-after time . . .’

  Wow. The memory of their recent kiss had come rushing back.

  ‘. . . for City-boy Dex,’ Tina was doing happy-ever-after jazz hands now, ‘and Dr Amanda the fantastic village GP!’

  Molly saw Matt’s car leave just after eight o’clock that evening. Moments later her doorbell rang.

  ‘You didn’t come back,’ Dex protested, following her into the living room.

  ‘You didn’t need me to.’ She sat back down at her drawing board and uncapped her pen. ‘And I had work to catch up with. Anyway, panic over. I’m glad it went well. He seemed really nice.’

  ‘He is. We’ve been talking about Laura. And . . . all sorts of stuff. He wants to stay in touch, be a kind of honorary uncle to Delphi. You know the sort of thing, turn up every couple of years or so with unsuitable presents.’ Dex paused. ‘Look, I’ve just put Delphi to bed. Do you want to come over for a bit? I thought we could open a bottle, celebrate the fact that Matt isn’t her father, she’s still ours.’

  Ours. It was only a figure of speech but it hit Molly like a knife in the heart. She shook her head and concentrated on the job in hand, capturing Boogie on a surfboard. ‘I really need to get this done. Can’t miss my deadline.’

  ‘Oh. Right.’

  There was a bit of an awkward silence. Aware of his gaze fixed on her, Molly didn’t look up. ‘And you can tell Amanda about it now. No need to mention the illegal baby-swapping bit.’

  ‘True. Well, I’d better get back to Delphi.’ Dex moved to the door. ‘Thanks anyway. For helping out with the whole illegal baby-swapping bit.’

  ‘No problem.’ Molly carefully cross-hatched the underside of the surfboard. ‘Bye.’

  When the door closed behind Dex a lump sprang into her throat, her skin prickled with shame and she had to force herself not to burst into huge sobby tears.

  Oh God, this is so stupid . . .

  An hour later, a different car pulled up outside Gin Cottage and Amanda jumped out, her short hair gleaming and her perfect figure more perfect than ever in a strapless aquamarine dress and matching heels. Glancing up and spotting Molly lurking like a troll behind the bedroom curtain, she waved and flashed her a saucy, cat-got-the-cream smile.

  Basically, because she had.

  Molly flinched at this last uncharitable thought, which surely made her a despicable person. Since learning the other item of news this afternoon, she should really be feeling more sympathetic than this.

  God, how she wished Tina hadn’t told her now.

  But that was the trouble with gossip; on
ce heard, you couldn’t un-know it.

  When Vince’s name flashed up on her phone at nine thirty, Molly was tempted not to pick up. The relationship wasn’t going anywhere; he was a genuinely nice person but niceness wasn’t enough. It would be kinder to stop it now.

  Which meant she probably should get the deed done and answer the phone.

  ‘Vince, hi. Look—’

  ‘Hello, darling, it’s me, Muriel! Listen, I’m here with Vince . . . remember we talked about how much we loved Mamma Mia and you said you’d tried to get tickets for the show here in Bristol but they’d all sold out? Well, they must have released a few more because Vince is on the website now and there are three available for the stalls on Thursday evening! But the page is on a timer and we have to book it now or we’ll lose it . . . so is Thursday OK for you?’

  ‘Um . . .’ Oh God, she’d really wanted to see Mamma Mia at the Hippodrome.

  ‘Thirty-seven seconds left,’ said Muriel. ‘Thirty-six . . . oh please say you can make it, Molly. It’ll be such fun . . . thirty-three seconds before it times out . . .’

  ‘Yes, I’ll come!’ Molly blurted out. Oh dear, now she was officially a bad person.

  ‘Really? Hooray, I’m so glad! We’ll have such a great night!’

  Then again, having heard the unalloyed joy in Muriel’s voice, maybe it was allowed.

  ‘Hear that, Vince? We’re on,’ Muriel said excitedly. ‘Go on, do it. Book those tickets now!’

  Chapter 46

  Never had a fish been more out of water. Poor Vince, he was like a fish in the middle of the Gobi desert.

  But it was a crowded, noisy desert. The audience at the soldout show at the Bristol Hippodrome was having the time of their lives; everyone was up on their feet, singing and dancing and clapping along with their hands in the air. Muriel, in the aisle seat, was loving every minute and Molly, next to her, could feel her joy. And then, to her right, there was Vince. Doing his level best to join in and failing utterly, his awkwardness palpable. Attempting to move in a dance-y way was evidently mortifying for him. He simply couldn’t relax, let go of his inhibitions and have fun.