Found by You

by Victoria H. Smith

  Seeing it was me, she laughed, placing her hand on her chest. The nameplate on her desk read, “Harriet Vine: Administrative Assistant to the Chancellor”.

  “Roxie,” she said, smiling bright. “What a surprise seeing you. He’s not in right now, but he only stepped out for a moment. I’m sure if you wait he’ll—”

  “I’m actually here to leave him a message.” For the first time, I realized I was breathy. If from the sprint over here or that fact that I was here, I didn’t quite know, and frankly, I didn’t care.

  Harriet grabbed a note pad. “Sure. What would you like me to say? I’m sure he’ll love to hear from you.”

  It twisted my stomach to hear that. Even more that I had to tell this sweet woman what I had to. She’d always been nice to me. I’d known her since I moved here and started college. I swallowed. “I need you to tell him nothing’s changed and what happened in the library needs to not happen again. He can’t look at me. He can’t stare at me or acknowledge my presence. He’s doesn’t know me here, and I…” I let out a breath, trying to calm down.

  I can do this. I have before.

  I lifted my head. Harriet’s expression had fallen, her head tilted at me. I ignored the expression, moving on. “And I don’t know him. We don’t know each other. Not here. Tell him that.”

  Her pen didn’t touch her tablet. She wrestled with it a moment before placing it down with a sigh. “Roxie. Dear, I really think you should wait for him. Talk to him.”

  I wished I could say I could consider what she said, but why should I wait for someone I’d been constantly pretending didn’t exist?

  Griffin

  Practice felt good as hell today. In fact, I’d been on my game like crazy recently. I felt inspired and motivated, and that energy channeled onto the court. At this rate, I’d be cruising into the rest of the season. Suddenly, those scouts and execs that always had a way of sprinkling themselves into the crowds during our games didn’t seem so intimidating. My mind was right, and I fully expected good news when it came to draft time.

  Ryan pulled up alongside me at my locker, a towel wrapped around his waist. “Jesus, Griff. You play like that and the rest of our games will be cake.”

  I chuckled, finding it funny the same thought crossed my mind moments ago. I was never one to make a big deal when I had a good day, or in this case several. I shrugged, pushing a towel through my wet hair from the shower I just took. “Just feeling good tonight I guess.”

  “I can see that,” he said, eyeing me over. Flashing a grin, he tipped his chin at me. “You seeing her tonight or something?”

  I never could fool Ryan. He was the smartest out of us roommates. Always had been and probably always would be. Grinning to myself, I snapped the towel I’d used to dry my hair at him. He skirted out of the way of it, lifting his hands in surrender.

  Shaking my head, I tossed the towel in my locker. “No more ragging. But yeah.”

  I did miss Roxie, though I’d admit that to no one but her, which I had in the notes I made sure to send along with an always-willing-to-help freshman or sophomore player to her. My schedule had been hectic, but tonight my new girlfriend and I would get some alone time…

  My girlfriend. So different to say. After the four-year runaround with Tanya, I never thought I’d cement that with a girl for a while. Though different to say, it never felt more right. I didn’t know where things would go with Roxie, but it was looking good. She was lax and I loved that about her. We had that in common. Being laid back allowed us to be comfortable with each other. No pressure. I never pressured her and she never pressured me. We were incredibly easy and chill. Not to mention she was understanding about how busy I’d been. Tanya used to get on me all the time about not being around, but not Roxie. Not at all. How had she lived so close and I’d never really seen her before? That thought had my mind spinning. Perhaps she never wanted me to before that night in the laundry room. I was glad she changed her mind.

  Ryan was still grinning at me, but simply shook his head and pulled his clothes out of his locker. One cool thing about him was he never gave a guy a hard time when he was clearly on a cloud like myself. That was a big reason why I didn’t hesitate telling him about Roxie. I was never one to make a big deal about who I was with, but if I was going to tell someone it would be Ryan. She was also his date when we were at the country club, so I felt it was best to keep him in the loop.

  The air suddenly went weird, and I was reminded of who I hadn’t told yet when he joined me and Ryan at our lockers.

  D.

  He also had his towel around his waist, greeting us with a nod before opening his locker. I dressed the rest of the way in silence. I hated to say I’d been dealing with the D situation with kid gloves. He’d seen Roxie’s videos, and I didn’t know how to broach the subject with him or if I should at all. It wasn’t my secret to tell, and if I was being honest, I didn’t want it getting out. I wasn’t ashamed of Roxie, but I didn’t want people gossiping about her. She was very fragile.

  Truth be told, I wasn’t the only one keeping my distance. It took two people not to talk, and D was playing his fair share of the part. We’d literally been like two passing bodies. When we weren’t on the court things just felt awkward, and I didn’t really know why. I’d been quiet, but he didn’t have a reason to be. He also didn’t smile as much and had been partying so hard he’d been missing classes.

  He dressed quietly as well. Well, as quiet as a guy could be in a crowded locker room. When he pulled a black, leather jacket out of his locker and put it over his t-shirt, he regained my attention. I’d never seen that before and it looked expensive.

  I wasn’t the only one who noticed.

  “Sweet jacket, kid,” said Jake, rubbing his hair with a towel as he passed him. At six foot eight, he was the tallest of us all.

  D tipped his chin, tight-lipped. “Thanks, man.”

  It wasn’t like I was envious of him or anything, but I didn’t acknowledge the jacket. I was ready to get out of the sweaty locker room anyway. Too much testosterone and not enough Roxie Peterson for my liking. Deciding to ignore the weirdness with D for the time being, I pulled my bag out of my locker. A pink envelope fell out of the pocket and onto the floor.

  D closed his own locker and saw it. He bent down, picking it up. “Pink?” he asked, eyeing it. The remnants of a smile was on his face and I was happy to see it. Maybe this weirdness between us was in my head.

  I took it from him, chuckling. “Yeah, I got mail on the way to practice today. It’s from my gram. A reminder about a family thing coming up.”

  “You mean that reunion you never go to?” He smacked my arm.

  I laughed. “Yeah. I guess I couldn’t avoid it forever. I am going this time. It’s only a weekend.”

  He nodded. “Now that you ain’t got Tanya it probably makes it easier.”

  He was right about that. True, I’d never been into big family gatherings, but she didn’t make the decision to go any easier. Tanya wasn’t about country life. At all. I invited her home freshman year and she had her nose up the whole time. Needless to say, I hadn’t made it back for this thing since. Tanya always seemed to be conveniently dating me at the time of the event. It was almost like she wanted to keep me away from them as much as she could. I refused to believe that, though. That was a new kind of crazy.

  When Gram called me about this thing, I was actually excited. I wondered if it would be too forward to ask Roxie if she wanted to go. I didn’t know if she’d ever been to Texas. It might be a fun time for her. Maybe I’d run it by her tonight.

  “For sure,” I told D, smiling from the thoughts of the new woman in my life. Though I had a feeling I would be anyway. I was happy this awkwardness with D was starting to work itself out. I needed to get on telling him about Roxie, too. I should be able to trust him. He was my best friend.

  He told me he’d see me later but was interceded by a guy circle that formed around him on his way out.

  “D, check
out your awkward ass in this suit,” said one of our teammates. He flashed him his cellphone screen.

  D took a look and nudged him. “Whatever, dude. Ain’t like you pretty,” he said, laughing. “Let’s find one of the country bumpkin over here.”

  He pointed at me and the room went up an octave in laugher. Smirking, I shook my head, joining them by the phone. They found one of me at the masquerade dance quickly on our teammate’s Facebook page, and I got to hear things like how my mask and suit made me look like a Hick-Ass Zorro. I took it all in good stride.

  “Let’s look for one of Ryan,” D went on, practically taking the phone from our teammate who showed us the pictures in the first place.

  Ryan joined the group, and the room let out their familiar round of chuckles. All but D that was, and when I watched him staring at the photo as long as he was, awareness flashed at why. Ryan wasn’t the only one in that photo. He had a girl on his arm.

  That girl was Roxie.

  She was in a long sequence dress that night and had on one other accessory…

  A mask.

  “Hey.” D lifted his finger, pointing at the screen. “Isn’t that—”

  I was by his side before he could finish. “D, let me talk to you a sec, okay?”

  His eyes flashed to me, squinting. Very slowly, his lower lip dropped from his upper. “You said you knew her.”

  I grabbed his arm, taking him away from the group before he could say anything else. The guys were still getting a good laugh at Ryan in his suit, so they didn’t give us a hard time as I dragged him to the locker room doors. When we got there, he pulled out of my hand.

  “She’s your friend?” he asked, eyes wide. “The soft core porn star is your friend?”

  I stepped up on him and he backed into a wall. “Don’t fucking call my girlfriend that!”

  His eyes grew two sizes in width, and I’d never seen him look so confused. “Your… your what?”

  I pushed my hand through my hair, trying to calm down. “She, Roxie, is my girlfriend.”

  “What…” His eyes wandered. “What the hell are you talking about? You… you dumped Tanya and Ursula. But you’re with a uh… uh…” He waved his hand like he was looking for the word. “A fat chick?”

  I didn’t know what happened. I really didn’t. I just knew I had him up against the wall, his feet at least an inch from the floor.

  “Griff, what the hell—!”

  I shot him a look and he finally shut the hell up.

  In a long moment of staring at him, I very slowly got my mind back and regained control. I lowered him with shaking hands, but I didn’t step back from him. We were about to make something real clear. Real, fucking clear right now. I pointed at him. “You don’t know shit about that girl. You don’t know a fucking thing so don’t act like you do.”

  His face went hard, cold, and I’d never seen him stare at me in such a way. He pushed me back from him. “Listen to me, Griffin. You jack off to that shit. Hell, you maybe even fuck it, but you don’t…” He let out a breath like he was trying to calm himself down.

  Why wasn’t I surprised this was coming from him? D had been caught up in the shit that was us for a while now. Money, gifts, and the overall phoniness of women. Girls like Tanya were the illusion. They weren’t real. The real stuff was far more beautiful. It only sucked that it took me so long to see it.

  I stepped up to him again. Though this time, I was calm. “I don’t expect you to understand. I don’t expect you to get it. But what I do expect from you is your respect. Respect her. Respect me. Your teammate, your captain, and your friend.”

  His jaw worked as he stared at me, and I knew we were at an impasse. A standstill. He didn’t get it and I wasn’t getting through to him. A couple of players moved past us, and after they did, I did the only thing I could do. Attempt to get his confidence.

  “Keep what you know about her a secret,” I told him. “Do that for me.”

  It took a moment for him to move, but when he did, he lowered. Picking up his bag, he put it on his shoulder. He must have dropped it in the scuffle. “You’re right, Griff. I don’t understand. And maybe, just maybe, if you would have talked to me about it instead of being all secretive and shit, I might have. Maybe if you would have given me the chance, but now…” He shook his head, his nostrils flaring. “I gotta go. I got a party to go to.”

  I was taken aback by what he said, but by the time I could formulate words he was already moving away from me. He left me standing there in the crowded locker room doors hoping that I’d gotten through to him.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Roxie

  I was lost. Had been for a while tonight. Griffin had a way of doing that to me. I whimpered, lifting my head and pushing back into the couch cushions.

  His lips went right to my neck. His smell was spicy and invigorating. He braced my forearms under his palms, his mouth more aggressive with every passing second. Griffin had his shirt off. I didn’t know who removed it. Him or me. I supposed that didn’t matter. I knew it was him that had me down to my boy shorts and white t-shirt though, the one with the wide neck and exposed my shoulder, when Griffin smoothed his hand over my skin. His kisses were so seeking tonight, hungry and aggressive. I always felt passion when Griffin kissed me, emotion emanating through his touch, but tonight felt different. He was touching differently, handling me different. He held me tight, hardly leaving any separation between our bodies, despite the fact we were only kissing. I felt longed for, extremely wanted and desired for. It was like he was trying to hold onto me. Perhaps this was all in my head. I didn’t know.

  He had me in a haze so deep I didn’t want to question it and only came out of it when the movie I had playing prompted the music of the beginning of the DVD start menu. How long had the start menu been playing on loop?

  I laughed, gripping Griffin’s shoulders, his skin so warm with his heat. “Griffin?”

  He didn’t stop kissing, going from my neck to my chest, and his husky breaths prompted tingles between my thighs. “Yeah?”

  “We missed our movie.”

  He lifted his head of mussed blond hair as I lay underneath him. He squinted, looking into the light of the screen. “Damn.”

  Laughing, I tossed my head back into my couch. I smelled a burst of his scent from the material when I did. I loved that smell.

  He panned to me, his lips moving into a smile. He propped his chin on his palm. “Do we care?”

  I didn’t if he didn’t. I shook my head.

  His lips continued on, mingling with my mouth this time. Easing my legs apart, I wrapped them around his waist. Keeping them there was a struggle. He was so large, built all over. I pushed my hand over his warm chest.

  He groaned when my nails bit into his skin. Taking his hand, I pushed it between us and into my panties. I wanted to get off so badly. I couldn’t wait to be moved into my bed.

  He stopped kissing me, his warm breath drying my damp mouth. I got his fingers right where I wanted them, but I didn’t remove mine. I enjoyed the feeling of our hands together, his long fingers playing with my clit.

  I pushed my mound against his hand, my arousal dampening and spinning wetness around our fingers.

  A curse left his lips and his tongue entered my mouth the same time two of his fingers pushed their way inside me.

  I whimpered, gripping into his scalp. Breathing him in, I took his mouth, loving our combined taste. His fingers got so deep inside me that I cried out, and when the wave of electricity hit, a startled “fuck” escaped my lips.

  He held me while I twitched down from the high with the smile I couldn’t get enough of on his face. My eyes were a bit glassy, and when I could finally see clearly again, I smiled his way.

  He leaned off me and rested on his propped up elbow, his other arm wrapped around my waist. He studied my face for a long time and I didn’t question it. I loved the way he looked at me.

  He pushed his hand underneath the hem of my shirt, brushing his th
umb over my stomach. “You know how beautiful you are, right?”

  A small smile lifted the side of my lips. I put my hands on his biceps, squeezing and touching. “So you tell me.”

  He didn’t seem to accept that answer. His face fell. “But you believe it, right?”

  What he was asking felt weird to me, and with the way he was kissing me tonight, deep as if holding onto me, it seemed like something was off. I lifted my hand up to his jaw. Closing his eyes, he moved his mouth into my hand, warming my skin.

  “Are you okay?” I asked him. “You seem intense tonight. You sound intense.”

  Opening his eyes, he let out a breath. He made some room in the space between me and the back of the couch and brought me into his arms. Things really felt off now and I couldn’t stop my heart from leaping.

  “I’m going to tell you something I really don’t know how to deal with,” he said. “I’m worried to tell you. Worried by what you’ll say.”

  My stomach twisted, my fingers curling against his chest. “Okay. All right. Just tell me.”

  He played with my hair resting on my back and those milliseconds before he spoke were agonizing. “It’s D. He knows about you. About what you do. Did. He knows about what you did with the videos.”

  I honestly didn’t know how to react to the information. I didn’t know because I wasn’t clear on what someone like D would do with what he knew. He wasn’t my friend, but Griffin’s. I didn’t know what to make of this.

  “I’d like to say we have his confidence, but things got heavy between us earlier today and…” Sighing, he moved a hand over his face. “I don’t know. I just don’t know.”

  I moved my hands around his waist. Bringing my head to his chest, I listened to his heartbeat. It thudded so hard in there. He said he was worried earlier. Worried about what I might say? Was he scared I’d be angry? That I’d leave this, us, because of his friend? For some reason, the thought of the latter made me see the situation differently. I should be worried about my secret getting out, but I found myself more concerned for Griffin. I was a face among many at this large school. A nobody from another town and state. My future career aspects were low profile. It wouldn’t be ideal, but if for some reason this information managed to follow me after college, my plans for myself could change. Fluctuate if need be. Griffin didn’t have that luxury. His future career aspects were anything but low profile. Ties to me could damage him by association. I didn’t feel he was worried about that though. He was more concerned about me. That made my heart warm and I said something that surprised myself. “What if people found out?”