Beautifully Insightful

by K. C. Lynn

  I rush over and kneel down in front of her, then frame her tear-streaked face in my hands. “Hey, hey, Em. Baby, what’s wrong, what happened?”

  She finally snaps out of her hysterics and it takes her a moment to register me. She looks around the bright room, a little disorientated, before her watery gaze comes back to mine. “Who turned off my light?”

  “What?” I ask through heavy breathing, my heart still pounding like a fucking drum.

  She starts sobbing. “Someone turned off my light!”

  “I did.”

  “I sleep with it on, I don’t like the dark.”

  The memory of the way she reacted in the theatre when the lights went down suddenly pops into my head, and my stomach instantly twists with guilt. “Fuck, I’m so sorry, baby.”

  She drops her head in her knees and cries harder. “I was so scared when I woke up and couldn’t see.”

  Picking her up, I cradle her trembling body in my arms then sit on the bed, bringing her down on my lap. I hold her close and apologize repeatedly, feeling like complete shit. She calms down a few minutes later and tries to pull away, looking embarrassed, but I don’t let her.

  Cupping her face, I force her to look at me, and the emotion in her eyes hit me like a punch to the gut. “I’m so fucking sorry,” I say again for the thousandth time.

  “It’s okay. You didn’t know,” she whispers. “It’s just… I lived in the dark for so long, Ryder, and the thought of being forced back into it is terrifying. I know I said my life was easier before, but…” Her breath catches and she shakes her head, frustrated. “Never mind, it makes no sense.”

  “Yeah, baby, it does. It makes complete sense.”

  She gives me a sad smile. “Sorry I worried you.”

  Worried is a major fucking understatement; she scared the living shit out of me. But I keep that to myself, not wanting to make her feel worse. “It’s okay.”

  Leaning over, I turn back on her lamp then I stand up to shut off the light. She startles from the sudden movement and quickly wraps her arms around my neck. I walk us back over to the bed then turn down her covers before laying her down and stretching out next to her. She tenses in surprise. “Let me hold you for tonight, Em,” I whisper, not wanting to be away from her. “Please, baby. Just this, nothing else, I promise.”

  She relents with a sigh then turns on her side to face me. I don’t hold back from wrapping my arm around her waist and pulling her in close. “Tell me about you,” she whispers.

  “What do you want to know?”

  She shrugs. “Anything and everything. What have you been doing the last six years? What made you decide to become an FBI Agent and not a motorcycle shop owner?” She gives me a sassy smirk, throwing my cover back in my face. I’ll take it because it’s better than her being pissed at me.

  I take a deep breath and try to figure out where to start. “When I moved to Florida I wasn’t exactly sure what I wanted to major in. I was so pissed and fucked up after leaving you that I thought about not even going to college.” Pain flashes in her eyes, the same pain that I felt all those years ago. I quickly move on, not wanting to dwell on that part. “I actually considered joining the Army, but after all the effort Mrs. Johnson went through to get me there I figured I owed it to her to at least take a couple of courses. One of them was criminology, and not only did I end up liking it but I kicked ass at it.” She smiles. “I don’t know how to explain it but I knew right away I wanted to do something along the lines of law enforcement. I thought about looking into a few different police departments to find out exactly what I needed, but before I could Professor Roth approached me. He asked if I had ever thought about looking into the FBI. When I got back to my dorm I researched the hell out of it and knew it was what I wanted to do. It’s not easy to get into, they get thousands of applicants, but I got lucky because my Professor knew someone over there. Frank Reynolds, who is now my boss, saw my grades and brought me into the internship program. I worked my ass off to prove myself, and I guess it paid off because here I am.”

  She watches me with her smile still in place. “I’m not surprised. I always knew whatever you did you would kick ass at.” Her words have me feeling all sorts of shit. “So what exactly do you do, Officer Jameson?” she asks with a smile.

  “It’s Special Agent Jameson, baby.”

  She arches a brow doubtfully. “Special Agent?”

  “Yeah, the FBI is a little different. We aren’t referred to as officers. Check my badge if you don’t believe me.”

  “That’s all right. I’ll take your word for it.”

  I smirk. “Does that make you hot, Em.”

  “Hardly,” she replies dully, but her blush gives her away.

  I chuckle. “To answer your original question at what I do, I work in the Criminal Investigative Division.”

  “Which means what exactly?” she asks, seeming genuinely interested.

  “It means we deal with numerous types of investigations. It could be financial crime, violent crime, organized crime, public corruption, and violation of individual civil rights. There’s a lot.”

  She watches me for a moment, her expression suddenly somber. “What category does my father fall into?”

  I think of how to answer. I don’t want to make her feel worse but I decide to tell her the truth. “Honestly, if he’s guilty of everything he’s suspected of then he falls under a whole bunch of shit.”

  “He’s probably going to prison for a long time, isn’t he?”

  The sadness in her voice has me feeling like shit. The truth of the matter is, if he’s convicted of what I suspect he’s done, he will be lucky if life in prison is all he gets. “Yeah, baby, probably.”

  She nods sadly. “I know he deserves it. What he’s doing is horrible, but there’s a small part of me, deep inside, that feels bad. I know I shouldn’t, he’s never cared about me, but I can’t seem to help it.”

  “You care because you’re a good person, it’s just how you’re wired, Em.” She’s definitely a better person than me, because I don’t give a shit about my parents. She stays silent, but burrows her face into my chest. I quickly register her silent tears against my skin. Pulling her in closer, I kiss the top of her head. “Everything will be okay, Em. I promise I’ll help you get through this.”

  I feel her nod, and that’s the last of our conversation. It isn’t long before I feel her breathing even out and her body relax. Even though there are thousands of reasons why I shouldn’t, I can’t help but feel a peace I haven’t felt in over six years. One only Emily has ever been able to bring me.

  Chapter 17

  Ryder

  The next day I’m sitting at the kitchen table watching Em bustle around the kitchen, talking on the phone to Rosa. “Okay, we will come by after lunch then,” she says. “Yes, I promise I’m fine, but I need to talk to you and I want to do it in person.”

  I get pulled from their conversation when I hear the door rattle as someone attempts to get in. Emily hears it and starts over, but I put my hand up to keep her back. My suspicion quickly turns into annoyance when I look through the peephole to see Cece reefing on the doorknob and banging her hip into the door, trying to get in. Unlocking it, I swing it open fast and she comes stumbling in. I grab hold of her just before she face plants.

  She steadies herself then glares up at me. “Jameson,” she snaps in greeting.

  “Kensington,” I mock.

  Her eyes narrow even more. “What are you doing here? Where is my friend?” she asks suspiciously, as if I have done something to her. “And why was the door locked? What have you been up to?”

  I roll my eyes, but before I have a chance to shut her up Emily comes in. “I’m right here. Sorry, I was on the phone with Rosa.”

  “Why on earth was your door locked? It’s never locked.”

  It irritates the fuck out of me to know that. “It’s so people don’t just walk in like they own the place,” I tell her, not bothering to hide my annoyance.r />
  She scoffs and lifts her big ass purse higher on her shoulder. Seriously, the girl’s purses are the size of fucking luggage.

  “Well, it clearly isn’t doing a very good job at keeping criminals out,” she replies sassily.

  If only she knew how far from a criminal I am, but her perception of me has always been skewed, just like everyone else’s around this fucking place.

  “Okay you two, that’s enough,” Emily cuts in. “And to answer your question about the door – I haven’t left the house yet this morning. I only took Summer out in the back today, so it’s still locked from last night.”

  “It should always stay locked,” I say firmly. Both girls roll their eyes at me, not taking me seriously, which jacks my irritation up another notch.

  Shaking my head I go take a seat on the couch.

  “Anyway, I was on my way to my meeting with the social committee and thought I would stop by to check on you. I tried calling yesterday afternoon to come by but your cell went straight to voicemail.” She darts a suspicious glance my way again, as if that’s my fault.

  “I know, sorry, I slept the day away after getting into it with my parents.”

  “Yeah, about that, um, I’m really sorry, Emily. I didn’t think my father would blab so fast.” She gives Em a quick hug then turns her attention back to me. “I have to admit, Jameson, you have some serious balls putting your hands on her father like that. It makes me hate you just a little less,” she adds with a smug smile.

  I grunt, not really caring if she hates me or not. Okay, well maybe a little, but only because she’s Em’s best friend. “No one puts their hands on her, I don’t give a fuck who they are,” I reply truthfully.

  “You heard about that?” Emily asks her.

  “Yeah, I was visiting my dad when yours came over, hollering up a storm. I have never seen him so pissed.”

  “It was a mess, that’s for sure,” Em responds somberly.

  “So how are you feeling? I saw the shooting on the news; they’re saying it is gang related. It’s a really good thing no one was seriously injured.”

  Emily glances at me and I give her a silent warning. We talked about this earlier; no one else can know what I suspect or what I’m really doing here. We are going to let Rosa in on it but that’s it. That alone has me feeling fucking nervous, but I think it may be our only choice to get her to open up to us.

  “Yeah, thankfully no one was seriously injured. I wasn’t, thanks to Ryder.” She gives me a sad smile and it makes me want to kiss the shit out of her.

  “What do you mean?” Cece asks, noticing our silent exchange.

  “Ryder reacted quickly and took me to the ground. If he hadn’t I would have been hit with a bullet, but it hit him instead.”

  “You were shot?”

  “It was just a graze, and worth it,” I add, not taking my eyes off Emily.

  “Huh. That also makes me hate you a little less. Keep this shit up, Jameson, and my hate may turn to only a very strong dislike.” Emily giggles, finding her funny. I personally find nothing funny about her, but it’s clear she cares about Emily, so I’ll stand her.

  “Well, I just wanted to pop in and check on you.” She gives Em one more hug. “I need to get to my meeting, but let’s do lunch soon.”

  Yeah, that isn’t happening until shit is wrapped up.

  “For sure. We will set something up in the next few days.” Emily walks her to the door. “Thanks for…” She trails off when Cece opens it. “Richard,” she greets in surprise to someone who’s standing on the other side of the door.

  Richard? Who the fuck is Richard?

  “Emily, are you all right?” I hear a second before some motherfucker walks in and wraps Emily in his arms.

  What. The. Fuck! I shoot up off the couch, my blood boiling hot, wondering who the fuck this asshole is that’s holding my woman.

  Cece is the only one who notices my sudden change and smirks. “Actually, I may not have to rush out after all,” she mumbles, amused.

  Emily steps back from the prick and shoots a nervous glance my way. “Yes, of course I’m okay. What are you doing here?”

  “Joanne just told me what happened. She said you wouldn’t be at work for a little while and I had to see for myself that you were all right,” he replies while intimately running his knuckles down the side of her soft cheek. My motherfuckin’ cheek!

  “Oh, well yes, I…” I cut her off when I yank her back and stand in front of her.

  The prick’s head cranes back and his eyes widen in surprise, clearly only now registering that I’m in the room. His gaze narrows as he takes in my possessive stance. “Excuse me, and who are you?”

  “I’m the guy that’s going to lay you out if you put your fucking hands on her again.”

  Emily gasps. “Ryder, stop it!”

  “Bring on the popcorn.” Cece chuckles, finding something fucking amusing.

  I watch the asshole’s gaze roam over my tattoos in distaste. “Emily, how do you know this criminal?”

  “Criminal? I’ll show you criminal, motherfucker.”

  Emily jumps in front of me as I start at him. “Ryder, I mean it, back off! And, Richard, stop the insults. He is not a criminal, he is a friend of mine.”

  Friend? Oh I don’t fucking think so. She is not going to play the fucking friend card!

  Just as I’m about to explode and lose all control, Cece jumps in and pats the dick on the back. “All right, I’m going to do you a favor here, Richard, and save your life. Come on now, let’s go.” She tries leading him out but he throws her hand off in annoyance.

  “I’ll see you at work, Emily. Call me if you need anything,” he grinds out before storming off.

  Cece clears her throat. “Well, it’s been entertaining to say the least. I’ll check ya guys later.” She quickly closes the door, leaving me with a really pissed off Emily. Good, because I’m pissed off too.

  “What the hell is the matter with you?” she snaps, stomping past me.

  I ignore her question and ask one of my own. “I want to know, right fucking now, who that asshole was!”

  “He’s a doctor at the rehabilitation clinic I work at.”

  “He sure seemed a lot fucking friendlier than a co-worker by the way he was touching you!”

  “Not that it’s any of your business, Ryder, but he’s also my ex. We dated for awhile and remained friends.”

  That has my rage jacking to a whole new level. It shouldn’t surprise me she has dated, it has been six years, but I don’t fucking like it. Not one fucking bit! Before I can think better of it I let my anger get the best of me, and I point my finger at her. “You are not going back to that fucking job when this is over. Got it?”

  She gapes at me, aghast. “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. My woman is not working with her ex, Mr. McFucking Touchy!”

  “You listen here, Ryder Jameson!” She snaps my full name. “First of all, I am not your woman!”

  What? Did she really just fucking say that?

  “And secondly, no one, and I mean no one, tells me what I can and can not do! So put your dick back in your pants, and quit trying to piss on me and mark territory that doesn’t belong to you!”

  That’s fucking it! She turns to storm out of the room but I’m quicker. Grabbing her around the waist, I spin her around, pick her up and slam her against the wall. Then I stake my fucking claim. I crush my mouth to hers and swallow her gasp of surprise. She resists for only a second before melting against me. I thrust my tongue past her lips demandingly, not waiting for permission. Her fingers weave through my hair, gripping with the same desperation I feel, and she gives just as good as she gets. The kiss is raw, aggressive and fucking perfect. I pin her to the wall with my pulsing cock between her sweet thighs. My one hand slips under her sundress and cups her tight ass, while my other grabs either side of her jaw, holding her in place while I fuck her mouth like I want her body. I feel like an animal, but I can’t seem to help it, all
I can think about is proving to her she’s mine.

  It clearly works for her because she whimpers and starts rubbing her hot pussy along my aching cock. I run my hand along the curve of her ass and bring my fingers to stroke the center of her wet panties.

  A low growl rumbles up from deep inside of my chest. “You feel this, Em? You are mine; every fucking part of you belongs to me. Your pussy knows it, you know it and I know it. I don’t want to hear different any more, and I definitely don’t want to hear about that fucking loser ever again.”

  Her eyes narrow and her jaw clenches under my hand, but there is no denying the lust raging in her eyes. “You are acting like a Neanderthal, Ryder. Don’t try to tell me you haven’t been with anyone else since you left.”

  My anger dissipates at the hurt in her voice. “No one who’s mattered, baby,” I tell her truthfully. “You’re the only girl who has ever fucking mattered to me, Emily. Even in the years I was gone, you owned me – all of me.” Leaning in, I rest my forehead on hers. “Tell me you get me, Em,” I whisper, touching my lips to hers. “Tell me you believe me, baby.”

  She stares back at me, a long moment stretching out between us. My heart pounds as I wait for her to answer. “I believe you, Ryder.”

  Those were the words I have been waiting to hear since our fight the other night. For the first time in two days I feel like I can finally take in a full breath, because I know she believes me. “Good. Now no more fighting, baby. Let’s go to Rosa’s so we can come back and makeup.” What I really want to do is fuck her right here, right now, but there isn’t enough time because I plan to be inside of her for hours.

  Her eyes narrow in annoyance. “I told you I believed you, Ryder, I never said I forgive you.”

  “Trust me, baby, by the time I’m done with you, you will forgive me,” I reply with a smirk.

  Rolling her eyes, she pushes away from me and I let her down to her feet. “You are so full of yourself, Ryder Jameson,” she quips as she grabs her purse off the couch.

  I can’t help but bait her. “You like it, Em, and you know it.”

  Stopping at the door, she turns back to me and gives me a saucy smile. “Maybe.”