by Cheri Allan
Kate sat back, nonplussed. “I’m sorry. I don’t know if I can do this. This is too weird. You... our grandmothers... no one is reacting... normally.”
“You mean we’re not freaking out?” Rachel said.
“Well, yes. I mean you are, but not about this.” She waved a hand toward her belly.
Grace reached across and touched Kate’s hand on the table. “Don’t you get it? It’s because this is not a tragedy. This is a miracle!”
“A miracle?”
“Yes! Life doesn’t always go according to plan. I mean, it rarely does. But it works out. So what if you’re pregnant with Jim’s baby? We know it might not be the order you’d like things in, but it doesn’t make it bad—”
“Wh—? How do you know I’m carrying Jim’s baby?”
Grace blanched this time. “Ohmigod! Are you saying it’s not Jim’s?”
“No! I mean, yes! It’s Jim’s.”
“Phew! You had me freaking for a moment there.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” Grace dabbed her forehead with her napkin and took a few deep breaths as if to calm herself. “So. Now what?”
“Yeah,” Rachel said. “When are you going to tell him?”
“I don’t know,” Kate replied. “I’m afraid of how he’ll react.”
“Jim? Why would you be afraid of him? You must know he’ll do the right thing.”
Kate sighed. “Why does everyone keep saying that? Don’t you understand that’s the last thing I want him to do?”
Grace frowned. “No, I don’t understand. Don’t you care about him?”
“Of course I do! Too much.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Rachel asked.
“I don’t want to be another person Jim is responsible for! I don’t want to be another person he ‘saves!’”
“Seems to me those are just words,” Susan said.
“But they’re important words!”
“Really? Are they so important you would push him away because of them? And what about the baby? Doesn’t he or she deserve a father? A father—I might add—who would be more than willing to be a part of its life?”
“I’m not saying I’ll keep him out of the baby’s life. I’m just saying I don’t know if now is the time to tell him. Up until this morning, this wasn’t even a possibility I’d considered. I need to get my head around it. I need to think things through.”
“Well time’s a ticking,” Susan gently added.
Kate let out another sigh. “I know.”
“Don’t you love him?” Rachel asked.
Kate bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling, nodded.
“Then what are you afraid of?”
“Everything,” she whispered, tears welling. “I’ve made so many mistakes. So many wrong choices, and Jim is such a good guy. He deserves somebody who’s not so confused. I’m afraid...” She gulped and took a stabilizing breath, looked up at them again. “I’m afraid he’ll end up resenting me. I screwed up...”
Rachel met her gaze, her own eyes welling with tears. “But you love him,” she whispered, “and if he really loves you, the mistakes you’ve made won’t change that. You have to believe that.”
“I don’t know...” Kate began.
“No!” Rachel insisted. “You have to believe that! You have to!” Then she buried her face in her hands and began to weep.
The other three women blinked at each other in surprise.
“Are we still talking about Kate?” Susan asked.
“What did you mean, ‘thought you wanted?’” Grace asked again, more gently this time.
“I can’t talk about this now!” Rachel sobbed into her hands. “We’re here to help Kate!”
Kate reached across the table and rested a hand on Rachel’s shoulder as it shook under her palm. “Tell them, Rachel. It’ll help. Truly. It’ll help.”
They all waited as Rachel visibly pulled herself together. She took a couple last shuddering breaths then pinned Kate with tear-filled eyes. “You’re right. I know you’re right. But it’s not them I need to tell—it’s Doug.”
“What do you need to tell Doug?” Grace wanted to know.
“And you,” Rachel said more firmly, pointing at Kate, “need to tell Jim.”
She nodded. Rachel was right.
“If you’ll tell Doug, I’ll tell Jim, but you,” Kate turned to Grace, “have to tell Jeff how you feel.”
Grace paled.
“You have to,” Kate insisted. “He deserves to know. And you won’t be happy until you’ve come clean. You’ve run from it long enough.” She looked around the table. “We all have.”
Grace turned expectantly to Susan.
“What?” Susan asked, looking at the others. “I’m apparently the only one here not keeping secrets!”
September 5
Wish me luck. After years of drifting, flirting around the edges, dreaming, I’m stepping off the cliff to see if I can fly. I’ve got a crazy get-up for the occasion and an even crazier group of new friends to cheer me on. Want to know the weird thing? It doesn’t scare me. Much. Not stepping off scares me more. It’s time. I’m ready. And as a wise ‘Tibetan’ monk once told my mother, “Bonsai!”
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
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KATE BIT HER LIP AND TUGGED at the edge of her sequined top, feeling decidedly conspicuous in the crowded parking lot by the high school gym. “I wish it came down a little further.”
“It’s supposed to bare your belly,” Rachel assured her. “That’s the point. Now stay still. I’ve almost got your hair fixed.” She pulled a bobby pin from her lips and tucked another strand into the elaborate up-do she’d crafted back at the house.
Kate wrapped her arms around her middle, knowing it did nothing to hide the gauzy turquoise harem pants she wore, or the fringe of beads dangling against her bare midriff where the matching cropped jacket left off.
“Stop worrying. It’s the perfect costume to get attention for your new business.”
“I still can’t believe how you guys pulled this all together so quickly.”
“Well, you can thank Susan and the Sugar Falls Community Theatre for the get-up, but the rest is all you. You, Kate, are The Clutter Genie who will—”
“—make chaos magically disappear,” Kate finished on a laugh. “It sounded so good last night, but now... You don’t think it’s over the top?”
“Maybe a little, but that’s okay. It’s catchy! Memorable. You’ll make a splash tonight, and before long, the clients will be lining up outside your door. You’ll see.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“I know I’m right. There.” Rachel stepped back. “I think I’m done. You look perfect.”
“Thanks. I owe you.”
“No you don’t, just help me adjust this bustier. It’s shifted again.”
Kate worried her lip as she tugged the bustier back into position for Rachel. “Rach, I know you and Doug are trying to work things out, but are you sure this is a good idea?”
Rachel tugged the red bustier higher then poked her arms into a gauzy white overshirt. “I need to do this. We had a long talk after I got home last night. I’ll never be happy if I think I’ve settled or missed out, Kate. Despite everything that’s going right in my life, I still need to explore... see if this is right for me.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.” Rachel swept back her honey-blonde hair and shielded her eyes from the late afternoon sun.
“But... riding a motorcycle... in your condition?” Kate asked hesitantly.
“We’re not going far.” Rachel reached over and gripped her hand. “Oh, I know you think it’s crazy, but—pregnant or not—I want to do this. I have to see if I’ve been romanticizing things all these years. Maybe it’ll feel silly, even wrong, but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering.”
They stood near the edge of the parking lot and waited, the crickets chirping in the
nearby athletic fields.
Moments later a motorcycle rumbled toward them. Its lone rider wore all black, his leather jacket supple with age.
He stopped.
Rachel took a breath and stepped forward with a tentative smile.
The rider smiled back from behind his visor, then pulled his helmet off.
“Ready?” Doug asked.
Rachel nodded, unstrapped the second helmet from the seat and slid into place behind her husband. “Where are we going?” she asked.
He slid his helmet back on and revved the engine, only his brilliant smile visible. “Anywhere, Gorgeous. So long as it’s with you.”
CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT
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“HOLY COW, RUTH HAS OUTDONE herself. Can you believe the turnout for this thing?” Nana peeked around the curtain at the auction in progress for the umpteenth time that evening. They were halfway through the program, and Kate was desperately trying to calm the fluttering in her belly. Between her splashy debut at the auction and the flyers tucked into every program advertising her new business, she prayed she would woo plenty of clients to earn a decent income. She had to.
“Okay the school band is almost done with their intermission piece. You’re up next. Ready?”
Kate nodded—what else was she going to do?—and stepped onto the stage. Hundreds of eyes turned to her. She swallowed hard.
Grace winked from the podium. “Our next item up for bid will be in hot demand. The Clutter Genie will make chaos magically disappear! As you see in your program, we’re taking bids on one full room reorganization tonight. Not just a closet. Not just your junk drawer, we’re talking one full room. I’ve seen the organizational magic this lady can perform, from home offices to fundraisers, so don’t be shy. How about we start the bidding at fifty dollars tonight? Do I hear fifty?”
Kate smiled and waved as a gentleman in the back made the first bid.
“Now this is a valuable service, so we’ll be increasing the bids in twenty-five dollar increments. Do I hear seventy-five?”
As the bidding rose above $125, Kate flushed with excitement. She smiled and waved again.
“$150. I’m looking for $150. Do I hear $150?”
“Two hundred.”
Kate caught her breath as Jim walked down the aisle toward the stage, his eyes boring into hers. His lips tilted in that half-smile that had her heart skipping a beat. “But I want to know if she’ll wear the outfit for me, too.” He was wearing a navy suit, no doubt for the announcement of the calendar voting results at the end of the auction. He’d never looked more appealing.
“I’m sorry, sir, the outfit is for promotional purposes only, but I can assure you she’s worth every penny. I’ve seen her work magic on a kitchen reorganization—”
“Two twenty-five!” someone yelled from the back row.
“Two fifty,” another voice called out.
“Five hundred,” said Jim, standing just below Kate now. The room grew quiet. “But I wonder if the lady will entertain other proposals?”
“Jim,” Grace scolded, her palm over the microphone, “this is a charity auction. We have to keep this family-friendly.”
“I’m all for family-friendly. I was just wondering if the lady would entertain a proposal of marriage.”
An excited murmur rippled through the crowd.
Kate’s knees buckled. She struggled to breathe. “I don’t—”
“Five twenty-five!” yelled a voice from the crowd.
Jim whirled. “Grams? I’m trying to propose here! Don’t bid against me!”
“It’s for charity,” she replied, palming something to him. “Sweeten the pot for her, James.”
Jim turned back to Kate with a smile. “Okay. I’ll sweeten the pot. Five fifty—if you also let me adopt Liam as my own son.”
The room fell silent as Kate stared at him in shock.
“The lady drives a hard bargain,” he said into the silence. “Okay. Five seventy-five—if you’ll also let me be the father of your future children.”
Kate couldn’t hold it in. The single tear slid onto her cheek. In an instant, Jim took the three steps onto the stage and was beside her, wiping it away.
“How’d you guess?” she whispered.
His eyes held hers. Intent. Searching. “Guess?”
In an unconscious movement, her hand found the soft swell of her belly and his eyes followed, then his lips curved in a disbelieving smile. “Kate,” he breathed, “are you saying... I already am a father?”
She nodded, unable to form the words.
His lips brushed her forehead. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered.
“I didn’t know. I don’t want to be saved,” she murmured.
“Did it ever occur to you maybe I do?” he asked, pulling back so she could see his face. “I’ve got this hero complex I need help with.”
Despite the ghost of a smile his joke elicited, she sighed. She glanced out at the rapt crowd then back again. “And I don’t want you to marry me... just because I’m pregnant.”
“Okay, I won’t,” he assured her. Then his face broke into a beautiful, crooked grin. “But, can I marry you because I’m crazy about you and want to spend the rest of my life with you?”
She trembled, hope bursting in her heart like fireworks in July.
“Come on, Kate. Paint your fingernails purple. Marry me.”
She wanted, desperately, to accept but shook her head instead. It wasn’t enough.
“What more do you want?” he rasped. “I— oh.” He cleared his throat. Swallowed. “You need to hear it, don’t you?”
She nodded.
He took a deep breath. Grinned. “I. Love. You.” The words whispered over her, a balm and caress soothing away the pain of the past, hinting at the promise for the future. “Marry me, so I can get used to how it feels to say that—and mean it—over and over for the rest of our lives.”
“Are you sure?” she breathed.
“As sure as I am we’re keeping this outfit of yours.”
“Rachel has first dibs,” she laughed, relief and joy bubbling through her. “She already called them. But... you’re really sure?”
He nodded.
Kate stared in wonder at the sapphire and diamond ring he held out. She knew its history. Knew it wasn’t new. But that made it all the more perfect. It was a thing of beauty and promise that was being given a second chance to shine.
Just like her.
“Yes,” she said tearfully, brilliantly. “Yes! I will marry you!”
Jim slid the ring on her finger then whirled to the crowd. “One thousand!” he shouted.
And then he swept her into his arms to share a smoldering kiss—blissfully unaware of the roaring applause, their grandmothers’ self-satisfied grins or Grace pounding the gavel as she exuberantly declared, “Sold!”
EPILOGUE
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IN THE END, SHE WORE PALE BLUE—a long, simple sundress she’d discovered at Lydia’s shop. It skimmed her toes as she walked toward him, the flowing fabric conforming to her legs as the breeze blew in off the lake. She’d insisted she didn’t want to wear white—she’d done the fancy-gown/church-wedding before. She wanted this wedding to be different—to be simpler and less fussy.
He’d never seen her more beautiful.
His chest felt full, as if the joy inside him would burst the confines of his body at any moment. It had been less than a month since he’d proposed, and Grams and Nana had pitched a fit about not being given enough time to pull together a proper wedding, but he hadn’t wanted to wait another minute to start life with his new family—and the woman he loved.
Thank goodness Kate was as impatient as he was; although, now that she was nearly three months along, that might have something to do with wanting to be married sooner than later.
Kate held a bouquet of wildflowers tied with a long satin ribbon and smiled that soft, sweet, hopeful smile he knew he’d never grow tired of. Lia
m, looking smart in his baby blue suit, held her hand as they made their way down the dock to where he stood, waiting, with the Justice of the Peace.
He’d been skeptical of getting married on the dock, but Kate had pointed out the futility of finding any other venue on such short notice. Besides, she’d said, the lake was where their love story began. He wasn’t sure if she meant chicken raft, the photo shoot… or the skinny dipping… but it didn’t matter. She was right.
Kate passed her bouquet to Grace who stood to one side with Liam and Rachel. Doug and Carter and Ian stood opposite. Kate met Jim near the end of the dock, and he took her hands in his. Her hands trembled slightly, or maybe that was him, but they felt warm and soft and right in his own. He ran his thumb over her fingers and smiled at the sparkling pale blue polish she wore.
“I love you,” he said, just for her, although it felt easy and natural now after a month of practice.
“I love you, too.”
“What do you say we do this?”
She smiled and nodded, overcome with emotion, and by the end of the ceremony, he couldn’t have told you what they’d said even though he’d agonized over the vows for days. All he remembered was Kate’s smile, Liam solemnly handing over the rings, the elation of hearing the words husband and wife and being given permission to kiss his bride.
He’d done so with gusto, hoisting Kate into a high hug and twirling her in a sweeping exuberant circle.
He’d never meant to knock Carter in. Honestly.
Carter landed with an inelegant splash in the cooling late-September lake water and no one laughed as hard as Grace as she generously leaned down to give him a hand back up… until he pulled her—wedding attire, bouquet and all—into the lake beside him.
Jim felt laughter bubble up inside him as Grace sputtered to the surface.
They hadn’t meant for it to happen. They hadn’t planned for things to end up the way they had, but sometimes, he figured, you have to accept the hand life deals you. True, maybe it’s the luck of the draw whether you win or lose, but he was more than happy to play this hand out.
He looked Kate in the eye and knew she felt the same way.