Protecting Her: A Romance Bundle
Page 6
This is the woman that I love, I think happily as we clutch to each other, feeling the intense sensations together. This is the person I want to be with forever. I love her, I need her, and we’ll make it work.
After a few moments, we collapse on the bed next to each other, panting desperately. I link my fingers through Veronica’s and hold her hand tight. I don’t want to let her go, not now, not ever.
“Our future will be amazing,” I reassure her smilingly. “I promise you that.”
Veronica turns onto her side and gives me a searching look. I can feel her eyes boring deeply into me as if she’s trying to find something I don’t ever show anyone else. “I hope you’re right.”
“Why are you hesitant now? Is something going on? Do you… not like my plan?”
That will put a spanner in the works, I don’t know what I’ll do if she hates it. I guess I didn’t consider that a possibility. She didn’t hear Brandon talk, she won’t know how amazing the armed forces will be for me. I really don’t want to come to a position where I need to choose between the woman I love and the career I desire. That’ll crush me. I don’t know which way I’ll turn, I crave them both so much. I want the life style and the job, but I can’t give up her either. It’s too much!
“No, it’s not that I don’t like your plan…” I feel relieved at her words, but she’s not done yet. “It’s just made the future that much more real, you know? I mean, it’s two years away, so I shouldn’t be so worried, but I am.”
I kiss her, before resting my forehead against hers for a moment to stare deeply into her eyes. “Don’t worry about the future, especially not now! We’ve got it made now, we’re both going to be successful. You’ll see.”
Veronica doesn’t say anything, but she does snuggle into me and rests her head against my chest. My heart pounds against her ear and I hope she knows each beat is for her. I wrap my arms around her and let my eyes flicker closed. I’m so exhausted now, it really has been a long day. The first day of the rest of my life. As I drift towards sleep, I think about everything Brandon said about the army. I imagine the travel, the community, the fitness, the purpose… all the things I know I’m going to love. I also think about Veronica and the things I’m going to do with her as well. Buying our first home together, getting hitched, having a family, growing old. The images all blend together well, I can see them all coming to life. I just cannot wait.
I’m going to have it all, I think satisfied. I’ve worked hard, and now I can have everything. The career, the love, the friendship, the happiness. I’m the luckiest son of a bitch alive.
9
Veronica
Two years later…
“This is weird, isn’t it?” Rachel asks while pouting out her bottom lip. “We’ve roomed together through thick and thin over the last three years, we’ve had this life changing experience together, and now it’s just done.”
“I know what you mean,” I muse thoughtfully. “I didn’t think I’d feel that way since my last exam was a week ago, I assumed I’d have plenty of time to come to terms with leaving, but now it’s really hitting me.”
I stare at the girl who’s been my closest friend for what feels like forever, and my eyes fill with tears. I didn’t expect to be so emotional, but I really am. “You will keep in touch with me, won’t you?” I beg.
“That’s what the Internet is for.” She tries to look blasé, but I think she might be struggling with this too. “We can talk through social media all the time, it’ll be like we haven’t even left, won’t it?”
I cock my head curiously at her. “Of course, it will! Living together and sending the odd message to each other won’t be the same thing. We have to make sure that we meet up all the time to hang out. I don’t want to lose you.” I grab her arms and give her as much of a smile as I can muster. “We’ll still hang out, I promise you.”
Rachel shakes her head, still not convinced. “You’re going to the city, aren’t you? To work for the newspaper, you’ve interned at over the summer. I’m headed back home to work in a school. We’ll be miles apart.”
I don’t want to hear it, not even for a second. I know my life’s changing, I’ve been trying to prepare for it, but it’s too many dramatic changes all in one go. I don’t know if I can hack it. I can’t lose Rachel, I’ll need her.
“Don’t say that,” I blurt out, the tears finally starting to spill out. “I know that it won’t be the same, but if we both make the effort to hang out, we can make it happen, can’t we? Please tell me that we can.”
She really has been an awesome person to me. She’s helped me whenever times have been tough. When I’ve struggled with work or the times I found it a challenge to adjust to what Jordan wants to do for his career. I’ve done the same for her too. I’ve pulled her out of dark holes when she’s made bad choices with guys, or she’s felt like she’s falling behind in classes. We can’t go through all of that and come out of it with nothing. The bond I have with her is like nothing else. I won’t ever be able to share the college experience with someone else.
“Of course,” she finally relents when she sees how upset I am. “It’s not that I don’t want to, I’m just scared at getting my hopes up and then never seeing you again. I’m going to miss you so much…”
Then she’s crying too. We both sob like fools while clutching onto one another. There’s no preparing myself for something like this. I thought there might be, I’ve really tried, but saying goodbye to the life that’s provided me with so much stability for three long years is done now, over. This isn’t like finishing high school. Then, I was glad to be out. Even though I had friends at school, I didn’t feel so connected to them that I couldn’t let them go. I walked away without much of a glance backwards. They were friends, but only for school. Even during all the times, me and Jordan went back to our home town during the breaks, I didn’t yearn to see any of them.
Now, I don’t think I’ll ever go back again. Maybe for brief visits to see my parents, but nothing too dramatic. I have my future to look forward to and none of that involves going back home. Onwards and upwards!
But my friends here… well, Rachel mainly, I don’t want to say goodbye to her. I know that I’ll work to keep our friendship alive. I’ll take time off, I’ll travel to see her, I want to keep her in my life.
“It won’t be long until I can come and see you,” I eventually gasp out. “Once Jordan has completed his ten weeks of basic training, he’ll start on his next regime which could take him anywhere.”
I gulp, the reality of that hitting all over again. Much as I’m more adjusted to the idea of him being in the armed forces and leaving me for a lot of the time, I still don’t know how much I’ll like it. I’m so used to him being around. I don’t know how it’s going to feel to not have that. I suppose it’s good that I’ll be so busy. I won’t have time to be sitting around missing him… I hope. I guess that’s something I’ll figure out as I go.
“Okay, well as soon as you can, we’ll arrange something. I think I’m going to need a break. I’m moving back in with my folks while I save up some money, so that’s going to be absolute torture.”
I moan knowingly. I don’t think I’d be able to do that! It’s not that I have a bad relationship with my parents or anything, we get on just fine, but after having all the freedom college brings, I don’t think I could go back.
“Oh, I’ll be sure to come and rescue you as soon as you can then. You’re going to need it!”
“Thank God the guys from the football team have organized this big ‘going away’ party.” Rachel rolls her eyes in an over the top manner. “I need a big blow out before it’s back to real life. This has been a bubble, hasn’t it? It’s kept us sheltered from real life and now… well, now I don’t think I’m ready to go back to it.”
“We’ll make it a good one,” I reply determinedly, needing her to know that I get her sadness. I don’t have to go backwards. I have Jordan and my career to delve right into. Much as it’
s scary and I don’t know what’s going to happen, it’s a positive step in the right direction. “We’ll make it the best night of our lives.”
“Urgh, but what if Tom is there?” She snorts with derision. “That didn’t end well, did it?”
Surprisingly, the next time I saw Tom he had his tongue down Rachel’s throat in the middle of our second year. It was a nice shock at first, I thought they would make an awesome couple and I’d still get to be friends with him, but as it turned out he has a real dark side to him. He certainly isn’t the nice guy he pretended to be on the first night I met him. Or the first few weeks that him and Rachel were together. I had a lucky escape.
“If we see Tom, we’ll run in the opposite direction.” I pat her on the arm. “It’ll be fine, honest.”
“Oh, and Zane. Urgh.” She shakes her head, unimpressed. “I really have made some bad choices. Maybe it’s good that we’re leaving here. I think I might need a fresh start. I think I might just avoid men forever.”
I laugh because we both know that isn’t going to happen. There’s no way she won’t meet a guy the moment she gets back home. I just hope he turns out to be the love of her life rather than another douche bag.
“Knock, knock.” At that moment, Jordan pops his head around the door, beaming. “How are you both?”
I stiffen, wondering if this is a bad time for Rachel. We’re just in the middle of talking about how disastrous her love life has been and my wonderful man walks through the door. But she likes Jordan, they get on very well, so it isn’t too much of a shock when her face breaks into a smile. Thank goodness. I don’t want to hide my happiness when I feel compelled to yell it from the rooftops, but I also don’t want to rub it in my friend’s face.
“Hey, Jordan,” she says gaily. “You look happy. We’ve just been weeping like babies, would you believe.”
Jordan chuckles and nods. “That doesn’t surprise me at all. You’re so emotional you two. Not me, I’m glad to leave. I mean, I’ve had fun and everything, but I can’t wait to move on. I’m excited.”
“And you don’t have any emotions about going? Nothing about the last three years clings to you and makes you sad? There’s not one sentimental bone in your body that’s scared to let go? Come on, Jordan!”
Jordan puts his hand around my waist and tugs me close to him. “I don’t need to hold onto anything from here because the most important thing to happen to me in college is coming with me. I get to keep Veronica.”
It’s so sweet, so touching, but I have to make a gagging noise as if I’m being sick because it’s the only appropriate response. Me and Rachel both. I do appreciate what Jordan is saying and I hope he knows that, but we have to joke around to make all of this a little bit easier. It doesn’t matter what he says, I know Jordan must have some part of him holding onto the past. This place has been good to all of us.
“Well, I’m not going to stick around and listen to you two insulting me.” Jordan moves towards the door. I think he can see that me and Rachel just need a little bit of time together, just the two of us. He’s right, I get to be with him afterwards, but my friend I’ll be somewhat letting go. “But I’ll see you both at the party, right?”
“We’ll be there. Just look for the two hottest girls there. We’re going to be in our best dresses.”
I don’t think that we’ll be alone in our dresses tonight, I’m sure everyone will be dressing up, but it’ll be reminiscent of the night me and Jordan got together. I haven’t forgotten the night me and Rachel strolled to that dumb frat party in our dresses, all confident, just to have our confidence shattered. So many things might not have happened if I’d turned and gone home that night. I suppose I have Tom to thank for that. Me and Jordan surely would have ended up together at some point, but he might have taken longer to ask me out.
It was all perfect in the end. Everything about my love story has been wonderful. I just hope that lasts afterwards when real life gets in the way. I don’t want this wonderful love to be shattered.
“Right,” Rachel declares with determination. “No more moping around, no more being sad. Let’s get dressed up now so we can have a few drinks together, just me and you. We want to turn up to the party fashionably late and a little bit drunk anyway, don’t we? We cannot be the first ones there. How tragic, can you imagine?”
A few drinks just me and Rachel sounds fun. I really like that plan. She’s the only person I want to say goodbye to properly anyway. “Yep, let’s do it. Let’s get dressed up. I’m going to wear the dress I wore to the frat party.”
“Ooh, fun! Me too.” Rachel digs back through her freshly packed bag. “If I can find it. It’s here somewhere.”
I won’t point out that she first saw Tom that night because it’ll put a damper on things. I don’t know if either of them recalls each other that night anyway, so it’s pointless. I want this to be nothing but fun.
10
Jordan
I might be putting on a good front that I’m all okay, that I’m happy and keen to move on, and to be honest up until this point I have been. I’m all for stepping into the armed forces and progressing, getting into the home which me and Veronica will be renting until I earn enough cash to buy us a place, I can’t wait for it. Maybe I’d be more nervous if it weren’t for Veronica. At least I’m not doing this alone. It should be all good…
So, why do I have this slight sense of doubt? I don’t know where it’s come from, it’s hit me from nowhere. Right in the middle of the very last party where we should all be having the time of my life. This is the last hurrah, the final moment to say goodbye to the last three years, and I’m sitting around like a miserable bastard.
At least I’m not ruining Veronica’s night, that’s one good thing. She’s dancing, drinking, and doing a lot of laughing with Rachel. She deserves that. She’s already shed some tears, so I don’t want my moment of madness to make that worse. I don’t even know why I have this odd sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“Hi, Jordan.” I’m shocked from my thoughts by Liam talking to me. “How are you doing?”
Instantly, it’s weird. Immediately I feel that familiar tension flooding me again. I don’t know what it is about Liam, we just don’t have anything to bond over. One year of sharing a room was enough. I soon moved in with Aron, one of the guys from the football team, and to be honest I haven’t looked back. I don’t think I’ve given him much of a thought until right now when he’s standing in front of me expectantly.
“Oh, hi, Liam. How’s it going?” I sip my drink, needing something to shed the discomfort.
“Good thanks, and, how are you? It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? How did the rest of college go?”
I let out a little chuckle. It was what it was, to me it’s become more of a training ground. I’ve spent every day getting fit and healthy so I pass basic training with flying colors. That has always been my end goal through everything. “Yeah, it hasn’t been too bad.” I give the blandest answer possible. “And how about for you?”
“Oh, great.” He nods slowly. “I think I did okay in my exams and I have a graduate thing lined up.”
“Oh, well that’s great news.” I genuinely am pleased for him. I want us all to do well. “You must be excited.”
“I am.” He sighs, sounding anything but. “I guess I’m just sad that me and Sandi will have to split up.”
I can vaguely remember the blonde-haired girl who he once asked me out on her behalf. It was a weird situation, but it seems like it’s worked out somewhat. Well, until this moment. Now it seems to be falling apart.
“What’s happened?” I ask him, more curious than I need to be really. “Why do you have to split up?”
He offers me a one shouldered shrug. “Because college is over, isn’t it? We can’t keep it going?”
I turn to face him, now becoming a little demanding. I guess I feel fiercely protective of this subject since me and Veronica are definitely going to make it work. “Why can’t you
? If you’re determined enough, you can.”
“I’ll be so busy with my graduate program and she’s going to be traveling for work. She’s got a position as a photographer, so she’s going to off doing what she needs to do. It just won’t work, will it?”
I gulp down, not liking the way that his words make me feel. I’m already all on edge tonight. This doesn’t help much. What he’s just described is what me and Veronica. She’ll be busy being a journalist, and I’m going to be here, there, and everywhere. It’s scary, I don’t know if it’ll tear us apart in the end. I don’t want it to, I need us to be solid and in a really good place. I haven’t had too much doubt in this up until this point, but now it consumes me. What if she resents being alone for a lot of the time? What if someone else shows her affection?
I dart my eyes over to her, watching her enjoy herself. She looks amazing, why wouldn’t someone else give her affection? I can’t be the only one who knows what a true beauty she is. It’s obvious. Fear circles around and eats me up. All of a sudden, everything feels much less certain than it once did. But I suppose, everyone serving in the armed forces must go through this, I’m not the only person leaving someone behind. It’s just something that I need to come to terms with, isn’t it? It’s part and parcel of it all. there’s no turning back now.
“Well, I’m sorry to hear that you don’t think you and Sandi will work out,” I reply to Liam idly. I kinda need this conversation done now, it isn’t helping me at all. “But I really hope you all manage to find happiness.”
I can hear Liam continue talking to me, but his words aren’t coming through, I can’t hear anything. My brain is shocked, it’s spinning, I’m trying to take all of it in. I don’t want this all to go wrong now. I can’t let it. Somehow, I need to find a way to get over this slump before it eats me up alive. I won’t give up like Liam has. He mustn’t love Sandi as much as I do Veronica, he can’t, or he would give up anything for her.