by Nola Cross
“More pizza please,” he said.
Chapter 9
As Hawk shifted in his chair, Desi sucked in a gasp. The warm, smooth skin of his right shoulder made brief contact with the hand holding the comb, sending a frisson of awareness through her whole body. Until now she’d been so careful to touch nothing but his hair. God knew that was bad enough.
But she was being silly, wasn’t she? A nurse had to touch her patients in the course of their care. And she’d had extended contact with his hands just minutes before.
But there was something different—more intimate—about touching the skin of his upper body. It was an area normally covered by clothing, after all. Only a lover might caress a man’s naked shoulder, or press a kiss to the smooth, golden skin of his back. The sensual impulse came out of nowhere, arrowing through her, thrilling and alarming her.
What if she were to let her lips trail along the ridge of his collarbone and up the side of his neck? What would the texture be like? How would he taste? But more important, would he laugh at her amateurish efforts? Push her away? Or would he turn his head and intercept her mouth, crushing her to him, stealing her breath? Her heart began to thunder at the idea, and the comb slipped out of her fingers and landed on the floor.
“Damn it!” She bent to retrieve it, grateful for the excuse to go to the sink and rinse the thing off. It gave her a moment to calm herself down, get a grip on what was real. She had no business thinking about kissing Hawk. If she was stupid enough to try something like that, he’d never take her seriously again. She let the cool water run over her hands longer than she needed to, buying more time, more self-control.
Being extra careful now, she resumed her spot behind his chair and parted his hair in the middle as he always wore it. All the knots had been worked out, and the black strands fell like a damp, silky curtain almost halfway down his back.
“If you don’t mind, Dez, I like to keep it in a ponytail. There are some rubber bands in the top drawer there.”
“Sure.” She grabbed one and gathered his hair into a single smooth rope and banded it, mindful not to let her knuckles brush against him again. “More pizza?” Her voice came out sounding kind of squeaky.
“Yes please.”
She fed him another bite, then busied herself putting away the first-aid supplies and stuffing the pizza box in the recycling bin.
“Why don’t you come sit down and eat?”
“I will.”
“When? I’m ready for another bite.”
“Oh. Okay.” She returned to the table and held the slice to his mouth. This time he made a strange growling noise and opened extra wide, biting off a huge chunk. Then he grinned at her as he began to chew.
“Classy,” she said, unable to keep from smiling back.
He swallowed. “Yep, that’s me.”
“How are your hands? Has the Oxy kicked in?”
“Oh yeah. I’m good to go.”
“Ha! That’s what you think. You’re supposed to be taking it easy, not doing dumb stuff like showering by yourself. Sarah is not gonna be happy with you when she sees your hands in the morning.”
He grimaced. “You’re right.”
“Next time you want a shower, let me help, okay?”
The words had just popped out of her mouth, unplanned. Now they hung in the air between them, dripping with unspoken implications.
After a long moment, Hawk cleared his throat. “And just how do you propose we pull that off, exactly?” His gaze was fixed on her face.
Desi’s cheeks got hot. “Well…well, we could come up with a plan to work together. Come up with some creative strategies. Like, first of all, maybe put baggies over your hands so your bandages don’t get wet.”
His brows lifted in surprise. “That’s a great idea.”
“And maybe you could wear your swim trunks so I could, you know, wash your hair and other stuff. With soap.”
He grinned again. “Another great idea. And what would you wear?”
“What do you mean?”
“If you’re washing me, you’d be getting wet too. Did you bring your bikini?” he teased.
“I don’t have a bikini. And no, I didn’t bring my swimsuit. It’s March, you know. It never occurred to me that I’d need to bring it.”
“I guess we just never know when something unexpected may happen.”
Was he referring to his injury? His eyes were fixed on her mouth at the moment, making Desi’s senses whirl. This whole discussion was inciting all kinds of forbidden sensations in her body as she tried to imagine getting into the shower with Hawk. Even if she kept a t-shirt and shorts on, it was a small space. They would be bumping against each other, and she’d be soaping up a washcloth and using it under his arms and across his back. She’d be standing close enough to shampoo his hair and apply conditioner. And when they were finished, she’d be drying him off, including the lower half of his body.
Oh my God. What would they do about his wet swim trunks? She’d have to help get them off. She’d have to help him dry off and get dressed.
“What’s wrong, Dez?”
She sprang up from her chair. “Are you thirsty?” Retrieving his water bottle from the counter, she kept her eyes downcast. No way would she let him see how confused and aroused she was.
* * * *
They spent the afternoon at the movies. It was Desi’s idea to go, and Hawk had to admit the distraction of the action-adventure flick was just what the doctor ordered, even if Arnie had aged a bit since the last movie of his Hawk had seen.
As the final credits rolled, he turned to Desi and smiled. “Great flick.”
“Yeah, it was pretty good.” She was busy gathering her purse and jacket and didn’t meet his eyes.
“Not your first choice of subject matter, I bet.”
Now she did look at him, her face lit by the flickering images of the ending credits on the movie screen. She smiled. “To tell the truth, I like spy movies, sci-fi, crime dramas, that kind of stuff. A little excitement is awesome. The classic Terminator series is the best.”
“For real?” He’d always taken her for the Hallmark movie type. Maybe she wasn’t as soft and delicate as she looked.
He remembered how she hadn’t flinched when she saw his wounds the first time, and how proficiently she had bandaged his hands this afternoon. She was capable. Strong. He liked that, he realized. She was different from the women he’d dated in the past.
In fact, it occurred to him that Desi might be the perfect combination. All curvy and feminine in her white terrycloth robe this morning, at the same time standing up to him, insisting she was staying. And now to find out she was a Schwarzenegger fan to boot? It made him hard just trying to process it.
What would she be like in bed? Shy and old-fashioned? A sexy tigress? Somewhere in between? For a few moments, as he followed her down the dim auditorium steps, he allowed himself to imagine the forbidden scenario. What would it feel like to bury himself inside her, to experience her moving beneath him? Would she make noise? He had to admit he liked it when a woman was verbal during sex. As well as oral. He grinned in the dark.
As they walked out into the gray drizzle a few minutes later she was chattering on about their choices for dinner. Hawk’s thoughts were still in the bedroom.
“Well, we just had pizza for lunch. How about Chinese? I make a pretty good chicken stir-fry,” she said.
He dragged his mind back to the present. “You don’t need to cook. We can go out to eat.”
She elbowed him playfully. “You want strangers to see me feeding you?”
“Oh, right. Takeout it is then.”
She looked hurt. “You don’t want to try my homemade stir-fry?”
“I’m sure your stir-fry would be great. But you’re already doing enough for me. You shouldn’t have to cook too.”
She was quiet as they reached her little car and she opened the passenger door for him. He tried not to let it bother him that elsewhere in the theater parking lot guys were
holding doors for their girls, not the other way around.
He slid into the seat and waited as she closed his door, circled the car, and got in on her side. Then she helped him buckle himself in. She fumbled with the seatbelt for a few seconds, long enough for his blood to creep toward the danger zone again. Having her fingers mere inches from his groin made him think about their earlier conversation. Was she naïve enough to think the two of them could get in the shower together—even partially clothed—and not have it turn into something more? Didn’t it ever occur to her that he was a red-blooded male who might find it difficult not to take advantage of the situation?
She looked over and gave him a little smile as she started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot. There was nothing in her expression that even hinted she might be concerned. It was clear that she’d placed all her faith in him, like a girl should be able to trust her older brother.
Damn.
* * * *
The stir-fry had turned out amazing, if she did say so herself. Desi smiled in satisfaction as she dried the last of the dishes and wiped the counters down. The sauce would have been better with a little fresh ginger, but still she was pleased. And Hawk had sure seemed to enjoy it. He’d asked for a second helping before she’d even finished her first.
The rice and chicken dish had proven easier to manage than the drippy soup from last night. By now she had perfected a technique of feeding him that didn’t involve her arm brushing across his naked chest. Which was good, very good. Because the longer she was around him, the harder it had become to hide her feelings.
Thank God he had decided to go watch TV for a while. Even having him in the same room was a distraction she could no longer deal with. Was she going to have to abandon her mission, or could she keep it together another twelve days?
As she put away the clean flatware, her cellphone rang. She glanced at the clock. That would be Tracy. Awesome. Her friend had called earlier as they were driving home from the theater, and Desi had asked her to call back at seven. Not only because she had to keep her hands on the wheel, but because she felt the pressing need to confide in her best friend.
She grabbed her phone. “Hey.”
“Hey, Desi. Is now a good time?”
“Perfect.” Desi glanced toward the living room. Through the archway she could see that Hawk was still glued to his news show. Still, she turned her back to him as she spoke. “How have you been, Trace?”
“Okay. It’s boring here without you. Rained all day.”
“Here too.”
“I guess that’s why they call it spring.”
“No doubt.”
“So your dad called the house phone here a few minutes ago. He said he had some big deal news to tell you. Wanted to know when you’d be home. You better give him a call.”
“What excuse did you give for me not being there?”
“That you were in the shower. He seemed good with that.”
“Damn it. He left a voice mail on my cell while we were at the movies today. I forgot all about it. I’ll call him right back. Thanks for covering for me.”
“No problem.” A few seconds of silence ticked by. “So what’s going on there?” Tracy’s voice was nonchalant, but they both knew what she was asking.
“Not much. It turns out that Hawk’s hands are burned. He can’t do much for himself. There’s a nurse who comes once a day.”
“Wait. His hands are burned? Does that mean he’s helpless? As in Desi please help me get dressed helpless?”
“Something like that.”
“Holy shit! Have you seen anything amazingly male yet?”
“No. And don’t make it sound perverted. I’m studying to be a nurse, remember? It’s all part of the job.”
“So you’re telling me you guys spent the night in the same house, all alone, and nothing happened?”
“Nothing.”
“And you’re just going to play Nice Nancy Nurse and blow off this opportunity to seduce your perfect man?” The tone of Tracy’s voice betrayed her skepticism.
“You and I have been over this, Trace. You know I could never tell Hawk that I think of him that way. If he knew how I feel, he’d just laugh his head off.”
“Oh, I sincerely doubt that. You’re a total babe, girlfriend. For all you know, he’s got the hots for you too.”
“No. No way. I’m pretty sure I’d know it if he had the hots for me. Besides, I’m not here to jump his bones. I’m here to pay him back for everything he’s done for me, remember?”
“So you say.” Again with the skeptical tone. “But I’m sure he’d be open to a different form of repayment.”
“Tracy! Drop it, okay? I’m not planning to sleep with Hawk. End of story.”
“Shouldn’t I have a say in that?”
Desiree whirled around. Hawk was standing just inside the kitchen door.
Chapter 10
“Hawk!” Desi disconnected her call without even saying goodbye to Tracy.
A wave of intense heat washed over her as she met his eyes. He stood staring from across the room, his black eyes riveted on her face, nostrils flaring. Tension radiated from his body. A desperate idea flitted across her mind: if she passed out right now, maybe she wouldn’t have to explain the conversation he’d obviously just overheard.
“Was that Tracy?” His voice was soft, almost disinterested.
“Yes, I—”
“And you guys were discussing the two of us having sex. Am I right?”
How was it possible for her cheeks to get even hotter? Her knees were noodles. She nodded.
He took a step toward her and then another. Desi shrank back against the edge of the counter. As he moved forward his eyes never left her face.
“I’m just curious, Dez. You’re not planning to sleep with me why?”
By now he loomed over her, his naked chest just inches from her face. Desi averted her eyes from his nipples and swallowed hard, her mouth as dry as newspaper. Then little by little she let her gaze creep upward until they were staring at each other, just a breath separating them. Her heart stumbled a time or two before crashing on again.
“I’m waiting for your answer, Desiree.” He was still speaking in that quiet tone, the timbre of his voice belying the dangerous spark of interest in his eyes.
She took a long, deep breath, buying time, still scrambling to invent some credible explanation. But the deep breath was a big mistake. Her senses filled with the smell of him: clean, warm, up-close male. And now her gaze dropped to his mouth, to those firm, full lips that were quirked at one corner in a quizzical smile. His bandaged hands brushed against her arms and slid up to her shoulders. It must have hurt him to hold her that way, but he didn’t flinch.
She trembled. “Well, you know,” she began. “You’re…”
“I’m what? Crippled? Deformed?”
“What? No!”
“Then why?”
“Well. Geez, Hawk. You always said I was your little sis—”
“We’re not actually related, Dez. You do know that, right?”
She nodded, wincing at his sarcastic tone.
“It’s not like there would be anything wrong about it,” he said.
“No?”
“No.”
“Then why does it feel so wrong?”
He let out an exasperated sigh and threw up his hands. He turned and stalked across the room, then spun to face her once again. “Damned if I know. Maybe because we’ve both told ourselves that story for so long.”
Her heart tripped again. Was he saying he’d been battling the same emotions she had?
“But you’re a grown man, Hawk. You’re almost thirty. And I’m still, you know—” She glanced at her feet. “—pretty much a kid.”
He gave a harsh laugh. “Oh, right. When was the last time you checked out a mirror, Dez?”
He looked at her now with open male hunger, an expression he hadn’t let her see before. Her entire body reacted in thrills of sexual excitemen
t, waves of heat and unfamiliar stirrings from deep inside. Breathless, she waited.
He strode across the room, not stopping until his body trapped hers against the counter. His bandaged hands stroked her arms again. “Do you honestly not know?”
Know what? She shook her head.
“I’m burning up for you, Desiree.” His black eyes blazed down at her.
“You are?”
A strange, pleasurable weakness assailed her limbs as his big body pressed closer. Something inside of her responded in a most primitive way, pushing her hips forward to meet his. She could feel his hardened penis—his cock—pushing back through the fabric of his sweatpants. He gave a soft groan and closed his eyes, his jaw working. They stood like that, motionless, for maybe ten seconds.
At last he looked down at her again. When he spoke, his voice was a broken whisper. “The truth is I’ve been dying to take you to bed since you came here in January.”
“You have? Why didn’t you just say so?” she whispered back, amazed at her own boldness.
“You’re kidding, right? How would that have worked out? So sorry Dovie’s dead, Dez. By the way, can I fuck your brains out?”
His harsh language made her gasp, sending strange, delicious tongues of desire to lick between her thighs. Some mysterious part of her insides seemed to melt as she held his gaze, her heart hammering in her throat.
“You needed someone to lean on.” He gave a deep sigh and then went on. “A big brother, not some sex-starved lecher. I was determined to be that brother you needed. Besides, I loved Dovie too. I wouldn’t have disrespected her.” Some of the fire had left his eyes.
“I couldn’t have gotten through those days without you, Hawk.” To Desi’s horror, she felt the sting of tears beginning.
Now his expression softened even more. “Aw, don’t cry, Dez.” He stroked her arms.
“I came here to be the sister you needed.” She swiped at her face with her sleeve.
“And you’ve been a big help, Dez. Really. You have. Don’t cry, okay?”
He slipped his arms around her, pulling her close. She laid her head against his chest and closed her eyes, letting herself melt into the rhythmic thunder of his heartbeat. In many ways, it was like the other hugs they’d shared—warm, enveloping, safe. Home. But this time she was also hyper-aware of his body, and especially the firm ridge of his erection where it snugged up between them. Whatever they might have told themselves in the past about the nature of their relationship, his very evident physical response had now changed the story forever.
