Hawk's Promise

by Nola Cross

  His inability to control himself around her confounded and frustrated him. The last thing he needed in his life was the complication of a serious romantic relationship, which was the only kind of relationship a girl like Desi wanted. Or deserved. Despite the answering passion in her kisses, he knew damn well she wasn’t cut out for a casual sexual encounter, yet every time he let himself be drawn in, the line between casual and serious seemed to get blurrier and blurrier.

  He knew one other thing for sure. If he allowed something sexual to start up between them, she was bound to get hurt, and that was the last thing he wanted.

  And the first thing he wanted?

  He shifted in his seat, wishing like hell he could punch something. Yeah, nothing had changed in that department; the primal male inside him still wanted nothing more than to make Desiree his. To possess her lush body, her eager lips. To drive into her and bring a helpless moan of release from her exquisite throat.

  After what seemed like hours she quit fussing in her purse and unlatched his seatbelt, keeping her gaze averted from his. That was wise. If she’d looked at him right then she might have guessed the lustful thoughts running rampant through his mind. Instead, she turned away and gathered her umbrella and got out. She opened his door for him and then fell into step beside him as they approached the main door of South Bay Classics.

  “I think it’s best if you hang out in the customer service area,” he said. “It’s not fancy, but it’s warmer than the garage and there are magazines and coffee. Bonnie can help you with anything you need. I should be less than an hour.”

  “Okay.”

  She opened the door and followed him in as he walked toward the reception counter. Bonnie glanced up from her computer screen and gave an odd little squawk.

  “Hawk! You’re here! Oh, I’m so glad you’re okay.” The older woman began to rise, her brown eyes filling with tears, then she cleared her throat and sank back into her chair. She gave him a watery smile and reached for a tissue, pressing it to the bridge of her nose. “We’ve been so worried about you.”

  He was touched by her obvious distress and surprised as well. In the years they had worked together she had always kept her emotional distance.

  “I’m fine,” he assured her. “I’ll be back on the job in a few days. This is my friend Desiree. You might remember her from when she was here a few months ago.”

  Bonnie looked toward Desi with a speculative eye. “I think so. Yes.”

  “She’s my ride today. Take good care of her for me, will you?”

  “Of course.” She sniffed and grabbed a second tissue.

  “Thanks.” He grinned at the two of them, then turned and shouldered his way through the swinging door to the service department.

  Right away his mood began to lighten. Strains of classic rock music wafted down the hallway from the garage, and the occasional clank of metal meeting metal. The familiar smells of motor oil and exhaust grew stronger, making him homesick. It was crazy how much he’d missed this place, this sense of normalcy, in the three days he’d been gone.

  Two of the guys were bent over the open engine compartment of a sweet little MG spider. Tony was the first to notice him.

  “Boss!” His broad grin warmed Hawk’s heart. The younger man wiped his hands on a shop rag as he strode forward. “It’s great to see you. How’re you doing?” He clapped Hawk on the back.

  Miguel turned and leaned against the fender of the little car, arms folded, a matching smile on his swarthy face. “You’re lookin’ good,” he said. “Way better than you looked in the ER the other day, eh?”

  Hawk chuckled. “I hope so. That was not my finest moment.”

  Miguel moved toward them, giving a dismissive shrug of his beefy shoulders. “What do you mean? You were muy valiente, my friend. Muy valiente.”

  “Whatever.” He glanced around the garage. Two of the lifts were occupied and a third vehicle waited near the bay door. It was a relief to know the business could go on without him for a few days. But beneath his bandages his hands began to itch. It was going to make him nuts waiting for his injuries to heal to the point where he could tear into an engine again. “Why don’t you bring me up to speed? What other jobs have we got coming in this week?”

  * * * *

  Desi tossed aside the dog-eared, two-year-old issue of People magazine and took her phone from her purse. It was well past noon. Even though it was spring break, Tracy should be out of bed by now. Desi was dying to fill her best friend in on the events of the last two days, and this was her first real opportunity.

  She glanced sideways at Bonnie, feeling uncomfortable about discussing personal stuff in front of a stranger. She stood up, preparing to go out to the car to make her call, when Hawk came back through the door, followed by Miguel Sanchez. The Hispanic man’s dark eyes sparked with unmistakable interest.

  “Desiree, you remember Miguel.”

  “Of course.” Desi smiled, trying to ignore the twinge of discomfort she felt. The man was looking her up and down like an art dealer appraising a newly-unearthed Van Gogh.

  “It’s good to see you again,” Miguel said. As he spoke, his gaze locked with hers and Desi had the oddest sensation, almost as if the man was licking her all over. “None of us had ever heard that Hawk had a sister.”

  “Well, I—”

  “Family is everything, right, Dez?” Hawk interjected in an impatient tone.

  Miguel’s brows shot up, and the three of them stood in awkward silence following Hawk’s outburst. To Desi’s relief the phone at the reception counter rang, and they all turned and looked as Bonnie greeted the caller.

  After a moment Hawk leaned toward Desi. “I just have some paperwork to look over, and then we can go.” He gave her a tense smile.

  “Okay. I think I’ll wait in the car. I need to give Tracy a quick call anyway.”

  “Fine. I should only be a few more minutes.” He and Miguel disappeared through a door bearing a small brass plaque that read Office.

  Outside, Desi walked the half-block to where her car was parked. A fine mist hung in the air, but she decided not to bother with her umbrella. She’d put her hair in a braid this morning just so she wouldn’t have to worry about weather-induced frizz. Sinking into the driver’s seat of the Volkswagen, she thought back to the expression on Miguel’s face and giggled to herself. Men! She might not be very sexually experienced, but it didn’t take an expert to know where his mind had been.

  Almost before she knew it, her thoughts returned to the unplanned embrace she and Hawk had shared in the bathroom that morning. Intentional or not, it had felt right to be in his arms, to have his lips pressed to hers. Unlike the discomfort she’d experienced just now when meeting Miguel, she had reveled in the naked desire she saw in Hawk’s eyes. And why not? He was the man she loved, the man she wanted. And it excited her to know that—despite his misgivings—he wanted her too.

  If only things were that simple.

  Tracy’s voice was heavy with sleep as she answered her phone. “Dez?”

  “Hey, Trace. Wake up and talk to me, you lazy-ass girl.”

  “It’s spring break. I need my beauty sleep.”

  “You’re already gorgeous. And I’m bursting to tell you everything that’s been going on since we talked Saturday.”

  “Oh. Yeah.” Tracy’s voice perked up. “You and Hawk. So spill it.”

  “Not just Hawk. My dad’s getting married. Did you hear about that?”

  “No way. Who’s he marrying?”

  “Cora’s daughter Seville. I promised I’d come home on Friday to help decorate for their engagement party the next day. You’ll help me, won’t you?”

  “Sure. That sounds like fun. But I just can’t get over your dad taking the plunge after all these years. Where are they going to live?”

  Desi gave a soft gasp. She hadn’t even thought about that. Would they all squeeze into Dovie’s little house? Or did Seville have her own place?

  “I have no idea,�
� she said, worry beginning to tug at the edge of her thoughts. Would the newlyweds even want her to live with them? If not, how could she afford her own place? Her mind began to race.

  “Well, never mind all that,” Tracy said. “That’s cool and all, but get to the good stuff. Have you screwed Hawk’s brains out yet?”

  Desi gasped again. “Tracy!”

  “Why not?”

  “Well, for one thing, he doesn’t have the use of his hands right now.”

  “Oh, right. That could be pretty awkward.” There was a clear note of disappointment in her friend’s voice.

  “And for another thing, he’s not ready for a romantic relationship.”

  “How do you know? Did he say that?”

  “Pretty much, yeah. We were kissing and stuff—”

  “Wait. You were kissing? Woo-hoo! Go, Desi!”

  “Right. Anyway, we were—”

  “Was it hot? Because he looks like he would be a very good kisser.”

  Desi’s pulse spiked as she remembered the way he’d pressed her back against the sink that morning, trapping her body with his own much larger one. She had to admit she’d liked that sensation of surrender. “Yeah. He’s a good kisser.”

  “So what’s the problem? You can do all kinds of fun stuff without using hands. Remember the Popsicle tricks I showed you that time? You could totally do that to him. Trust me, he’d love it.”

  Desi did her best to ignore the sudden rush of blood to her face as she imagined doing what Tracy suggested. She’d seen enough of him this morning to imagine the rest of what he looked like, to imagine the taste and texture of his skin against her lips.

  She swallowed hard and cleared her throat. “Tracy. You’re not listening. He says he doesn’t want to get involved. He thinks he’ll end up hurting me.”

  “What do you mean he’d hurt you?”

  “You know. Because I love him.”

  “Oh my God, Dez. You didn’t use the ‘L’ word with him, did you?”

  Desi sighed and scrunched her eyes closed. “I guess I did.”

  “Holy crap. That’s just asking for trouble. Guys are all about sex. At least they think they are. You have to let the love thing kinda sneak up on them.”

  “That sounds too complicated. I know Hawk cares about me. And he made it pretty clear that he wants to take me to bed.”

  Tracy laughed. “Of course he does. You’re hot.”

  “So what do I do?”

  “Let him know you’re all about the no-strings sex thing too.”

  “I doubt he’d believe me since I already told him I loved him.”

  “Maybe you just have to show him.”

  “You mean like surprise him with it? That’s kinda hard to picture.”

  “You’ll come up with something, Dez. I have total faith in you.”

  * * * *

  Hawk nodded as Miguel held out the last piece of mail for him to skim, a come-on for liability insurance, which he already had plenty of. “Pitch it,” he said.

  Miguel tossed the letter into the trash.

  Hawk nodded toward a pile of opened invoices. “Go ahead and have Bonnie pay those and mail them out, okay?”

  “Sure. When you gonna be back in?”

  “I don’t know. I was thinking I’d stop in every day, but you and the guys seem to have a pretty good handle on things. You can always call me if you get stuck.” He brandished his bandaged paws. “It’s not like I can be of any use in the garage right now anyway.”

  Miguel gave him a sly grin. “Si. You have plenty to keep you busy at home, eh?” He waggled his brows.

  Hawk scowled. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I’m just saying that it must be a good thing to have such a beautiful sister at home to make you feel better.”

  Heat spurted in his neck. “Don’t be an ass, Miguel.”

  “What? You trying to tell me the two of you are related by blood? I don’t think so, mi amigo.” His grin got wider.

  Hawk sprung from his chair. “Nothing’s going on between us, so get your mind out of the gutter.”

  He strode to the door, growling in frustration as he realized he had to wait for the other man to let him out. Taking his sweet time, Miguel began to gather the paperwork from the desk. Finally, he sauntered over, dark eyes still glinting with mischief.

  “Well, in that case, maybe we could double date some time, eh? You and my sister Rosa. Me and your sister Desiree.” Miguel winked and swung the office door open wide, moving out of reach just as Hawk took a quick step toward him, his right hand forming a fist inside its bandage. For a split second his mind went red. All Hawk knew for certain was he couldn’t let his womanizing friend anywhere near Desi.

  “She’s not for you,” he said, pitching his voice low. Inside, he was shaking with sudden fury.

  Miguel held up his palm in a placating gesture. “Okay, man. Cool off. I was just joking.”

  “I’m serious, Miguel. Stay away from Desi.”

  Chapter 14

  “How’s Tracy?” Hawk asked Desi.

  Not that he cared really, but the silence in the car was deafening and they were still ten minutes from home. All he wanted was to block out the memory of Miguel’s lewd insinuations. For some reason that short encounter they’d had just now had elevated the whole situation with Desi from difficult to excruciating.

  “She’s good. She promised to help me decorate for the engagement party.”

  “That’s nice of her.”

  “Yeah. I’m glad she wants to help. She always has all kinds of creative ideas. Plus she’s super tall, so she’ll be in charge of hanging the crepe paper streamers.” She gave him a quick smile before turning her eyes back to the road.

  “That’s handy.”

  “Uh-huh. I’ve always kinda wished I were a lot taller myself.”

  “I think you’re about the perfect height,” he said without thinking. When he’d lowered his head to kiss her, her mouth had been in just the right spot.

  This time she kept her gaze front and said nothing, but he thought he could make out patches of deepened color on her cheeks. Was she thinking the same thing he had thought just now, remembering their kiss? When was he going to learn to keep his big mouth shut? Reminding her of their attraction to each other was just going to make this whole situation more untenable.

  The silence closed in again, punctuated by the sweep of the wipers across the windshield. It had begun to rain in earnest just after they left the garage. He let his eyes go closed, focusing on the rhythmic swooshing sound. That worked for about twenty seconds, and then his friend’s words swam back into his consciousness.

  Damn you, Miguel. How dare you suggest that Desiree and I are fucking?

  A new surge of outrage erupted in his body and then morphed into a spike of raw lust. The memory of their embrace overtook him again, the way her slender hands had looked and felt as she struggled to button his jeans. Hell, just moments before that the woman had been on her knees behind him, toweling off his legs, his ass, his cock.

  All I would have had to do was turn around to face her.

  Her beautiful pink lips would have been at just the right level…

  He jerked his mind away from the vivid fantasy, but it bounced right back again, making him squirm in his seat.

  “You okay?” he heard her say.

  He opened one eye, almost afraid to look at her in person after the lurid scene he’d just been picturing. “Hmm? Oh. Yeah. Just a cramp in my foot.”

  Was it fair to be pissed at Miguel for assuming the same things he kept thinking about himself? He sure could use some help with this. Walt, where the hell are you when a guy needs someone to talk to?

  He tried to imagine sitting across from his old friend, like he used to on a Friday night, both of them three beers down. Walt would have that fuzzy expression he’d sometimes get after having a couple, and he’d lean a little bit forward and squint attentively while Hawk told him everything.

  I
n fact, he had talked with his mentor about Desi many times in the past. But in those talks Desi was always still a child, and the conversation had centered on Dovie’s letters extolling the girl’s accomplishments in school, or complaints about her dick of a dad. What would Walt have had to say about these new emotions of his, these inappropriate, out-of-control yearnings?

  “You love her?” The old man might have stroked his grizzled chin and speared Hawk with his keen stare.

  “Sure. She’s like a little sister to me,” he would have answered out of long habit.

  “Doesn’t sound to me like you’re thinking about a sister.” The old man would have given a soft chuckle.

  “What do you mean?” The indictment rankled. First Miguel, now Walt. “I always sent money to help out, to take care of her and her family. I’ve always been…protective of her, you know?”

  “Protecting her from what? Guys like you?”

  Walt’s accusation stung. But the old man was right, wasn’t he? He’d had the same thought himself, had warned little Dez about guys like him. He wasn’t good for Desiree. His pedigree practically guaranteed he’d bail on her, just like his dad had done to his mother.

  And hell—just the same way he’d been half a world away when his mom had needed him. It was clear he couldn’t be counted on by the people he loved.

  Still it pissed him off to hear it.

  “Yeah, I know I don’t deserve her,” he growled under his breath.

  “I didn’t say that now, did I?” Walt leaned back and removed a pack of smokes from his pocket, tapped one out, lit it and took a deep draw. “In my book you’re a fine young man, no one better. You think I’d leave all my earthly possessions to just anyone?”

  Hawk smiled at that. “No, sir.”

  “Well then, if you’re good enough to be my chosen heir, you’re damn good enough to love Desiree. She’d be lucky to have you.”

  The improbable statement hung in the air like a thick, blue exhaust cloud. Lucky to have me? He almost laughed. Walt didn’t know the whole story. He’d never told Walt how he’d left his mom to fight her cancer all alone at a time when he should have been at her side. Just like his old man, he couldn’t be counted on by the people who loved him. It was that simple.