Home to Harmony

by Dawn Atkins

  “Yes, it is…Dad.”

  Bogie grinned.

  After that moment with Bogie in the greenhouse, Christine felt like a new person, one who truly knew her place in the world for the first time ever. Big pieces in her personal puzzle had snapped into place. Mainly, she’d let go of her perfect image of what a father and a mother should be, in favor of who they really were. And when David returned, she would see him as he was, not as she wished him to be. Princess rooms were fun, but reality was…well…real.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  TWO WEEKS AFTER DAVID had run away, Christine was gathering plates to set the table when the phone rang and Aurora answered it. She listened, then grabbed Christine’s arm, mouthing David, her eyes wide. Christine’s heart leaped into her throat.

  “Hey there, chief,” Aurora said to him. “You’ve got us all bummed out over here. No one’s singing folk songs night and day, that girl Delia keeps asking when you’ll be back and Lady howls us awake every evening.”

  She listened to David, then said, “Your mother has some news you might want to hear.” She meant about Bogie being his grandfather. “You want to talk to her?” She glanced at Christine, listened, then frowned. “You sure? I promise I’ll stop her if she starts to give you hell.” She sighed. “All right then. Yeah, put him on.”

  She held the phone to Christine. “Skip wants to talk to you. David’s not ready.”

  Her heart sank, but at least he’d called. “Hello?”

  She heard Skip tell David to go watch TV. “Hi, Chris,” he said into the phone, sounding weary, not angry.

  “Skip, before you say anything, can I have your phone number, so I can reach you in an emergency?”

  “Yeah, no problem.” He gave her all his contact information and she scribbled it down, relieved to have a link at last.

  “And I also want to tell you that I was wrong to keep David from you. I’m glad you’re getting to know each other.” The difficult words came out in a rush. She held her breath for his response.

  It took a while.

  “Well, yeah,” he said finally, surprise in his voice. “I’m not like I was, Chris. You never gave me much credit.”

  “I realize that. I wasn’t fair.”

  “Good, then.” He cleared his throat. He must have expected an argument. “I just called to find out when his school starts.”

  “The third week of August.”

  “So, three more weeks.” He sounded disappointed, which seemed odd. “The thing is I’ve got deals brewing and he wants to shadow me all the time. I do half my business in bars, Chris.”

  “That’s difficult,” she said, her heart lifting. It sounded as though Skip was ready to send David home.

  “He just dropped in on me, you know. No warning.”

  “Oh, I do. And he can be intense.”

  “And judgmental as hell. He got that from you.”

  She didn’t react to the insult. “It sounds like you’ve had a long enough visit. Am I right?” She desperately hoped so.

  “I can’t make him leave. He’d never forgive me. But there’s school, so that’ll be a good end time.”

  “It’s up to you. There’s plenty for him to do here, though, and obviously a lot more space. An entire boarding house.”

  “The apartment is tight, all right. And now he wants to go deep-sea fishing.” Skip sighed.

  “Even if he’s not showing it at the moment, seeing you means a lot to David,” she said, surprised that she actually meant the words. Skip was not the father David wanted, but he was the father David had. And that was better than one he’d dressed up as a hero the same way Christine had done.

  A WEEK LATER, CHRISTINE was in her office when the phone rang. “Harmony House, may I help you?” she said.

  “Mom?” David’s voice was small and shaky.

  “David?” She caught her breath, determined not to overwhelm him, even as she wanted to shriek with joy and relief.

  “I want to come back,” he said abruptly. “Dad’s an asshole. He’s never home and when he is, he acts like I’m in the way.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.” And she was. She could hear the hurt in his voice and wanted to ease it if she could.

  “He hangs in bars all the time, smokes weed and then lies about it. Half the time he goes to bed to avoid talking to me.”

  “Remember, you caught him off guard dropping in on him and it’s hard to have a guest for long, especially in an apartment. You’re on vacation, with complete free time, but he’s working.”

  Another long silence. “You’re defending him?”

  “Just trying to help you understand him. I was wrong to keep you from your father. I know that now.”

  “Yeah?” She could hear him breathing. Her change of heart had no doubt confused him. “Anyway, he said he’d buy me a bus ticket whenever I want, so I want to—” He stopped abruptly, then said, “Hey!” to someone in the background.

  “What did he tell you?” Skip demanded of her. He’d grabbed the phone from David. “That I neglected him? Because I spent all kinds of time with him. Movies, the beach, we played Xbox ’til I had blisters—”

  “I don’t doubt it, Skip. Relax. You don’t have to explain a thing. He’s my son, too, remember? I know how he can be.”

  “Good, then,” he said, sounding relieved. Then he lowered his voice. “He acts like he’s the dad, waiting up for me, sniffing my clothes for smoke and booze.”

  “That’s no fun.” Christine grinned to herself. David might have Skip’s temper, but he had Christine’s perfectionist streak. He preferred how things should be to how they really were.

  “But he’s my son,” Skip said on a sigh, “and I should be glad to have him around.”

  “Next time, we’ll plan it for when you can take a few days off, so you’ll be more relaxed for the visit.”

  “Next time? You’re cool with that?”

  “Of course. He needs to spend time with his father.”

  “Maybe a long weekend first. Build up my resistance.”

  She laughed. “He won’t be a teenager forever. And next time he’ll have more realistic expectations. He thought you’d be the genie in the lamp all wrapped up with a trip to Disneyland.”

  “Good one,” he said. “You’re still pretty smart, Chris.”

  “Thank you. And you’re still…you.” Moody and flaky and selfish, but not the monster she’d held in her memory. And he loved David. She could hear it in his voice, right through the complaints.

  “David has two of us rooting for him now,” she said. “And that’s important.” She’d been a single parent too long. It was time to share the pains and the glory. It felt damn good.

  THREE DAYS LATER, Christine climbed into her Volvo to get David from the Preston bus station. The interior smelled like polish and she smiled. Carl, who’d given the car a tune-up “just for fun,” had detailed the interior, too. He was a sweet guy, prison tats notwithstanding. Maybe Aurora was right about the karma at Harmony House.

  As she turned the key, she glanced out at the House, then went still. In a couple of weeks she and David would leave here for good. She hadn’t let that sink in. She climbed out of the car to take a good long look at Harmony House in all its glory—bright paint, colorful doors, restful landscaping, the front porch bright with hanging baskets of Bogie’s flowers and vines. It looked so welcoming now, so fresh and homey and peaceful.

  Christine’s view of the place had changed, too, even without the superficial fixes. The place she’d seen as neglected and sad turned out to be sturdy and stubborn and full of happy secrets.

  Aurora’s prayer came into her head: May we all find here what we need. Christine had needed a fresh start for David and to help Aurora and Bogie. She’d gotten that and more.

  She’d gotten back her mother and found her father. She’d learned how to love her son better. There was the constant ache of losing Marcus, of course, a pain so deep she feared she’d never recover from it, but, as some consol
ation, she had Harmony House and the people and work she loved. It felt like home.

  What if she stayed?

  There was David and school to consider, but returning to Phoenix held risks, too. What if he wasn’t strong enough to resist his old friends and habits, including Brigitte? David had made new friends here—the twins, a few of their friends and Delia, who asked about him constantly.

  Christine had heard that the high school had a great fine arts program. Hey, if New Mirage High was good enough for Susan Parsons’ perfect twins, then it was pretty damn good.

  There would still be drugs, of course. As Marcus had pointed out, drugs were part of the culture. But she trusted David more. On the phone, he’d confided in her that seeing his dad come home high had made him swear off pot. You have to be awake for your life, he’d said, and she’d almost burst out laughing at the delicious irony of David’s fantasy father being an object lesson in why not to do drugs.

  Marcus would love that. She’d tell him when he got back from L.A. Marcus. Just the thought of him made her heart ache. It seemed to get worse and worse as time passed instead of better.

  What if they stayed?

  Living at a commune meant hassles and sacrifice, but it also said something about the human spirit, about the possibility of becoming better through deliberate sharing, deliberate dependence, deliberate love.

  She looked up at the fresh yellow paint, out at the lush gardens, thinking about the tentative promise, the wistful hope that was Harmony House. Why not stay?

  It would not be a cakewalk. She might understand and appreciate Aurora more, but they would still fight. The commune was old. Things would break and fail. Hell, the electricity was still fragile and the DSL signal hinky.

  What about her career? She’d planned to start her own advertising agency, but the idea seemed less urgent now.

  David might throw a fit. But there were lessons for him in staying: Sometimes you belonged. Sometimes you made the best of things. Sometimes not getting what you wanted made you stronger.

  She sounded like Aurora, who’d dragged Christine kicking and screaming out to the middle of nowhere because Harmony House would be good for her.

  The ironies kept piling up. Harmony House hadn’t been good for her exactly, but it had helped shape her into who she’d become, in all her flaws, strengths and hopes.

  For her, staying might give her what she’d told Bogie she wanted: to feel settled in, safe, surrounded by people she loved who loved her back, doing work that mattered.

  Maybe, just maybe, staying here was her soul’s work.

  Christine climbed into the car again and started off for David, but she watched Harmony House in her rearview mirror until it was out of sight.

  In Preston, at the bus station, Christine’s excitement about seeing David turned into anxiety. Would this be weird? What would she say to him? Would he be sullen, hostile? How would she handle that?

  Then, there he was, standing on the top step of the bus, blinking in the sudden sun. Her son. Her David.

  Her doubts dissolved. She would know what to do and say.

  He’d gotten so big! He’d only been gone a month, but he looked so much older. He was becoming a man. For a moment she couldn’t catch a breath.

  He saw her, ducked his head, descended the steps and came to her. Before she could decide whether or not to try to hug him, he threw his arms around her and hugged her hard. She’d been a fool to think David would stop loving her just because he spent time with his father.

  “You’re taller,” she said when he let go, her voice wobbly.

  He seemed pleased by that. “Dad kind of cried when I left.”

  “He loves you, David. We both do.”

  “Whatever. Can we just go?” But he had to hide his smile.

  The drive went fast. They talked nonstop. First, David unloaded on her about all his dad’s flaws, on and on, until she gently coaxed him into talking about the fun stuff, too. Then she told him that Bogie was his grandfather.

  He sat for a long silent moment before he said, “Bogie’s cool.” Then he paused. “So he’s in my family now. Think of all the free weed I can get.”

  She jerked to look at him.

  “Just messin’ with you.” It was so nice to joke again, Team Waters against the world. For the moment, at least. Two steps forward, one step back, as Marcus had said.

  “Some summer, huh?” Christine said softly. “We both found our fathers.”

  David pondered that for a moment. “Yeah,” he said finally. “I guess we did.”

  Soon they were at the New Mirage exit, and when they passed through town, she watched David scan the streets for friends. She smiled. Maybe he wouldn’t hate her forever when she told him they were staying.

  Before long, they were pulling through the gates to Harmony House. She felt so different from when they’d arrived. She’d been uncertain about being here and worried about David. Today she was more sure of herself and her son.

  She turned to him. “Before we go in, I want you to think about something. What if we stayed?”

  “Here? You mean for good?” He stared, jaw hanging.

  “We could give it a year to see how it goes. The school’s decent. The classes are small. They have a great music program.”

  “Supposedly the band director did studio work in L.A., but that could be B.S. They’re all a bunch of hicks.”

  “Which means you’d be the cool urban dude.”

  “God. Don’t say dude.” He shook his head, telling her how lame she was, but he wasn’t angry. “I thought you hated this place.”

  “Not anymore.” She explained the changes in her thinking, and she told him she trusted him more, that he could make more decisions for himself here.

  “So I get my permit?” he asked.

  “Why not?” She wasn’t above a bribe.

  “No curfew?”

  “I said I trusted you more, not completely.”

  He sighed. “Whatever.”

  “You’ll think about it then?”

  He only shrugged, but that was good enough for now.

  Bogie and Aurora met them at the door. “How’s my grandson?” Bogie said, walking right up to hug David hard. Aurora just beamed. Had she ever seen her mother beam before?

  Bogie and Aurora had arranged a welcome-home supper for David with balloons and a sign and his favorite dessert—store-bought ice-cream cake.

  After supper, Christine went out to the greenhouse to tell Bogie that she hoped to stay. Until she was certain of David, she would hold off on telling her mother.

  He didn’t seem a bit surprised. “You’re happy then, Crystal?” he asked, his soft gray eyes as intense as she’d ever seen them. She remembered Aurora saying Bogie had always been a pest about happiness.

  “Getting there,” she said. “Definitely getting there.” Despite the hole Marcus had left in her heart, despite her worries about David, she was on the path. “Thank you for helping me figure it out.”

  She looked at his calm face full of quiet love—a love waiting for her since she was a seven-year-old in lacy anklets and patent leather shoes—and felt a rush of regret over all the lost years. “I wish I’d known you were my father before. We wasted so much time.”

  “Not wasted. Waiting. We were waiting until it was right. And now it is. And you’re happy. What more could a father want?”

  TAKING THE WINDING ROAD to Harmony House, Marcus was ridiculously excited to see Christine again. And David. It was stupid, of course. Nothing had changed. And it would only renew the pain he’d managed to tuck away while he’d worked in L.A.

  He was back now and with a plan. He’d decided to create a foundation to support rural health care in Arizona.

  He would name it after Nathan.

  Carlos was his field consultant and Marcus would rent a house in New Mirage for when he wasn’t traveling. He anticipated many twelve-hour days, welcomed them, in fact, since it kept him from dwelling on how much he missed Christine.r />
  She’d e-mailed him when David returned and told him David would talk to him once Marcus got back to Harmony House. She’d changed her mind about Lady, which surprised him. Maybe her landlord had agreed to an exception. She’d saved the news for Marcus to tell David.

  He’d barely unzipped his suitcase when there was a knock at his door. David with Lady. “Come in,” he said, waving him inside. “I just got here.”

  “I saw you pull up. I told my mom I’d come by. You wanted to say something…?” He sounded uneasy and resentful.

  “I do.” Marcus sat on a chair and patted the bed for David to sit. He did, but reluctantly. Lady lay down at his feet.

  “I wanted you to know that I value your friendship. Separately from how I feel about your mother. I enjoyed the time we spent playing guitar and talking. I believe you’re a remarkable young man and—”

  “Stop. It’s no big deal. I was pissed at the time, but it’s your business. And my mom’s…whatever.” He stretched his neck, his face flaming red.

  “You have every right to be angry. I kept an important secret from you after asking you to be honest with me. I apologize for that. You deserved better.”

  “It’s cool. Just stop, okay?” He seemed to mean that, so Marcus let it go for the time being.

  “I’m here when you want to talk more about it.” He hoped he hadn’t completely destroyed David’s trust in him. “There’s one more thing. Would you like to have Lady?”

  “You’re kidding! You’re giving me your dog?”

  “She was never really mine. I know Nathan would want you to have her.” His throat tightened. “And she clearly loves you.”

  “You hear that, girl?” David dropped to the floor and buried his face in the dog’s neck. “You’re staying with me.”

  “I spoke with your mother and she approves. I assume she cleared it with your landlord.”

  He looked up at Marcus. “There’s no landlord. We’re staying at Harmony House.”

  “You what? You are?” Marcus was stunned. Christine was staying? Stupidly, his heart leaped in his chest.

  “Mom’s making us. It’s lame, but my old school sucked. The kids know about how Brigitte scammed me, so it would be humiliating.” David shrugged. “Anyway, I’m stuck here now.”