by Simone Elise
Trigger leaned against the car. “What do you know? Your boyfriend thought of that ahead of you.”
I didn’t even think about it. I punched him with all my force on his arm. “Say that again. And I will make sure it’s the last thing you will say. Only you would take something nice and make it dirty.”
“How was the doctor’s today?”
“Like you really care,” I scoffed and lifted Tyson out of the stroller.
“I do care.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What are you playing at?”
I watched his expression change. His eyes flashed with emotion. Finally, he opened his mouth. “Well, if it affects Tyson, it affects you. So I care.”
“Why aren’t you out looking for Abby?”
He rolled his eyes. “That didn’t answer my question.”
I strapped Tyson in. He was still asleep, which meant he wasn’t going to be sleeping tonight. “You didn’t answer mine.”
“I asked you first.”
“Really, you are going to play that game?”
He arched his eyebrows and nodded his head. “So, how was the doctor’s?”
He was doing this on purpose, just to annoy me. I chewed my bottom lip. Should I tell him? I tilted my head, studying him. Why did he care again? Because if it affected Tyson, it affected me. So he cared. Right.
“Tyson passed with flying colors. I haven’t failed looking after him yet. They were more concerned about Abby being a no-show.”
“Did you explain the situation?”
I laughed and looked at him to see if he was serious. He was. “Only in a movie would Abby being missing make sense. Now I answered your question. Why are you here?”
Considering he was the only guy here, apart from the mechanics, I was interested in knowing why he was still around.
He tilted his head, his expression drying up. “Reaper made me stay.”
“Why?” I scoffed. I couldn’t think of one good reason for him to be here.
“To look after you. When it comes to you, he is making sure all your needs are met. And for some stupid reason, he thinks I am the best man for the job.” His eyes were locked on mine. Jealousy was painted in his eyes, along with anger. Was he mad he was being forced to put up with me? Most likely.
“Well, I’ll make sure to tell him you don’t want the job.” I closed the door and went to walk around him when he grabbed my arm.
“Why would you do that? Do you not want me around?”
I took a steady breath in, trying to focus, but all I could think of was that he was touching me. This grip was firm and warm and it was spreading warmth through my body. Suddenly it was even hotter outside than before.
“When it comes to you, Trigger, I don’t know what I want,” I finally stuttered out like a complete fool.
I should have pulled my arm from his grasp and then stormed off. But I didn’t. I just stood there.
“He thinks you feel safe around me. Is that true?” His hard expression softened. And he was looking at me like I could say whatever I want and he would accept it. But at the same time, it was like he was waiting to hear the right words.
I took a deep breath in. Did I be honest? The longer I looked into his deep blue eyes, the more the truth was just coming into my mind. “Yes, that’s true.” There, I said it. I was admitting to needing him. He could think what he liked about it. “Not that you care,” I added. “Now let go of me. I have to go.”
His eyes flickered to my arm and then back on my face. “Where are you going?”
Why did he care? “Supermarket. Tyson needs diapers and we have no food because all these extra charters are eating everything that isn’t nailed down.”
He let go of my arm, only to take the car keys from my hand. “What are you doing?” I followed him around to the driver’s side of the car.
“Driving you.”
“I don’t need you to. I can drive myself.”
He laughed and opened the car door. “No, you can’t. You couldn’t pull this out of this parking lot even if you wanted to without hitting something.”
“Reaper doesn’t expect you to babysit me.” I crossed my arms.
“No. But he expects you be looked after and his son to be protected. So here I am.”
He was acting like he was doing me a favor. I crossed my arms. “Don’t you have girls to sleep with?” Since the other charters got here, Trigger had been more focused on the women they brought along than on the fact Abby was missing.
“Only one. And she has made it clear it isn’t happening. So I’m good to go, if you are?”
He was referring to me, wasn’t he? I turned him down once and he remembered that clearly. How about all the times I did sleep with him? Did he remember them?
I sighed, dropping my arms. Fine, he could drive. At least this way I wouldn’t be entertaining the mechanics with my backing out skills.
I climbed into the car. It had that new car smell.
“I wonder how much this set Reaper back,” I muttered, taking in all the chrome and the fancy dashboard.
Trigger was backing the car out. “Hundred thousand, most likely.”
“He wouldn’t seriously spend that much on a car. Especially for me. Abby, now that makes sense.”
Trigger glanced at me. “Like I said, he is making sure you are looked after.”
I rolled my eyes. “Nothing is going on.” I looked out the window. “Anyway, I’ve sworn off men.”
He laughed. “You and men are one and the same, Kim.”
“Nope.”
“Yes.”
“You have always been with a man.”
I looked at him. “No, I’ve always been waiting on you.” I was being deadly serious. Ever since I was sixteen, I’d been hooked on a drug I could never get a full dose of. Only now was I putting a stop to it. “And if other men looked my way, you made sure they were less than interested. Between you and my father, other men didn’t stand a chance.”
Trigger’s eyes flashed from the road to me, his expression unreadable, before he looked back at the road.
“And now?” he said, with a bitter tone.
“Like I said, I’ve sworn off men.”
“Except for one.”
“I already told you I’m not after Reaper!” How many times did I have to say it? Did I literally have to scream it at him? Where were these people getting these crazy ideas from? As if Reaper would even look at me in that way. The only woman he had ever cared about and looked at was Abby. The same woman he had half the country looking for.
Trigger glanced at me with a smirk. “I was talking about me.”
I gulped, meeting his intense eyes. Maybe I had given up on him. But he hadn’t given up on me. Yet.
“What makes you think I want anything to do with you, after the way you have been acting?”
He scoffed.
“What, Trigger? You have been screwing your way through the charter girls.”
His jaw tightened. And he wasn’t taking his eyes off the road. I thought he wasn’t going to answer me. Like always, he would shut down.
“Maybe I’m just trying to fill a hole,” he gritted out. Then he glanced at me. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
He could say what he liked. Actions speak louder than words. I leaned forward and turned the radio on. Then I sat back, looking out the window. I couldn’t look at him. Did it hurt me that he was with other women? Yes. Tyson had been taking my mind off it. But if I was honest, I wasn’t sleeping because all I could picture was Trigger with other women. They were glued to his side at the club. Then he was forever dragging one off to his room. Sometimes he didn’t even make it to his bedroom. I had caught him in the kitchen only a few days ago.
Whatever. I was over it. Being so close to him was like suffocating with a plastic bag around my head. My senses were alive and waiting for only one thing: for him to touch me. Why was my body craving him so much, yet my
brain was able to understand he was no good for me?
What was Reaper thinking, leaving Trigger with me? I was better off with a prospect. At least then I would be feeling nothing. Instead of this slow torture.
It was my heart against common sense.
***
So, it turned out well that Trigger came, ’cause I needed someone to push the shopping cart. I couldn’t push the stroller and a shopping cart. And Tyson was too little to go in their baby seat. Plus I didn’t know if they were safe or not.
Trigger was pushing two shopping carts. I had filled one up completely and the second one was nearly full as well. When the men ate, they really ate.
Trigger was in the frozen section getting French fries. I was in the meat department. I had a hand on the stroller and was bending over, looking at the porterhouse steaks, when someone whacked me hard on the ass.
I jumped up, only to find two dipstick college kids gawking at me. I glared. How dare they touch me! They were laughing. I was used to men being pigs. But they always knew the boundaries.
“Come on, sweetheart. You can’t put it on display and expect me not to touch,” one laughed.
Just breathe, Kim. “How dare you just whack me!”
“You put it out there,” the kid had the guts to say.
My grip on the stroller tightened.
“Kim, I couldn’t find the crinkle cut fries so I got straight. Will that do?” Trigger came up behind me. I looked over my shoulder.
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
“What’s wrong?” One look, he knew me that well.
“Nothing.”
The guys sniggered and then their eyes ran down me like I was a piece of meat and they were dogs.
“Can we go?” I went to bend over and grab the meat, but stopped. “Can you get the meat for me?” I turned to Trigger.
“Why can’t you get it?” His eyes narrowed, going right through me.
“’Cause I can’t bend over,” I hissed. “Please just do it.”
He looked at me and then at the college kids. He let go of the shopping carts and headed for them. What the hell was he doing? I hadn’t said anything.
“Something funny, man?” Trigger’s voice was actually friendly, like he was in on the joke.
“We were just admiring, man.” One of the guys put his hands up. “Can’t help a guy wanting to touch.”
“So you touched her?” Trigger said lightly, like it was no big deal.
“She has one firm ass. Can see how you ended up knocking her up.” They laughed.
I was getting the same feeling I had this morning at the outpatients’. As if I was nothing more than a biker whore.
“Right,” Trigger said. “I just wanted to check.” Then within two seconds, like a blink of an eye, Trigger’s fist connected with the guy’s jaw and his friend didn’t even have time to block Trigger before he punched him too. Both were on the floor, one with a bleeding nose and the other wailing.
Trigger kneeled. “Girls like her are out of your league. And men like me will make sure of it. Have a nice afternoon, boys.”
I was literally still gawking at him as he got up and walked toward me. His jaw was clenched and he looked like he was holding onto a lot of anger right now, like they were getting off lightly.
“You can pick up the meat now.” Trigger was back at the shopping carts.
I nodded my head, still in shock. I picked up a couple dozen packets of meat and threw them in the shopping cart.
“OK, we can go.” I couldn’t look him in the eye. I still couldn’t believe he’d just done that. The guys were still on the floor as I pushed the stroller around them.
I could feel him following me with the shopping carts. We lined up and I put Tyson at the end of the checkout and went back to the shopping carts. This was the bit I hated about shopping, loading all the stupid things on the belt. I bent over and picked up the diapers. Just as I did, I felt a firm hand whack my ass. My eyes widened and I looked over my shoulder, not believing Trigger had just done that.
He smirked at me. “Now, that’s mine to touch.”
I shook my head at him, taking in his smartass smirk. He thought I was his to touch? I didn’t know how I felt about that. “Just help with the groceries.”
“Nah, I get a better view if you do it.”
“Trigger.”
“Kim.”
“Fine, if you aren’t going to help, go look after Tyson.” I pushed him in the chest. He laughed. At least he would be doing something then and not just checking me out.
When I got home I was burning this outfit. All it had done all day was draw attention to me.
Chapter 4
Kim
I couldn’t think of a time I wasn’t with her. Even when we fought, we always made up. We could call each other names and could say the most awful things to each other, but we always made up. We always stood together.
I was struggling as I gripped the sink in my bathroom. I needed my sister. I just needed to know if she was OK. I needed to know she was still breathing. I knew she was strong and would fight to the death. She was also smart. They were two of the things I loved about her. Did she know I loved her unconditionally? She trusted me to look after her son. She had put all her faith in me to care for him.
So far I hadn’t let her down.
Everyone was doing everything possible to find her. And all I could do was just wait. Wait for news. Wait for them to get back. Then wait to be told what they had found out. So far it was just more leads to other cookhouses.
Jake Frankston kept his location quiet. Reaper had found out that he collected his money from a post office box in town. He got a message when one of the cookhouses dropped off the money then he collected it the next day.
His post office box was currently being watched.
I looked in the mirror at my reflection. I was the spitting image of Abby and people were noticing. Dad was treating me like a ghost. Reaper’s eyes always hardened when he looked at me. And most of all, it was a stab in the heart every time I caught a glimpse of my reflection.
I was her twin. I should have some feeling about whether she was OK or not. Running a hand through my blonde hair, I turned my back to my reflection and flicked the lights off. It was after three in the morning and I should have been sleeping. Instead, I was up worrying.
All I did was worry. I worried about Tyson. Abby. Reaper. And then when I wasn’t worrying, I was feeling sick to my stomach about a man who couldn’t care less for me. He saw me as good for only one thing and when that stopped, so did his attention.
I looked at my made bed. I should try and get some sleep.
Or I could go down to the bar and drink.
Maybe after a few I could find some peace.
I slipped on a black t-shirt dress and opened my door. One good thing about living in a clubhouse was there was always an open bar.
I was walking down the hall, when I stopped at Reaper’s door, listening. Nothing. Tyson must be asleep.
Finally.
The little thing slept so much during the day I was positive he would be awake all night. I kept on walking. Past Dad’s room. Past Trigger’s room and straight down the stairs till I was walking into the bar.
No one.
Great.
At least no one would witness me drinking my worries away.
I walked around the bar, grabbing a bottle of vodka, orange juice from the fridge and a glass.
Walking back around, I pulled out a stool. The bar lights were still on and the living room lights too. So the place was still lit up. Like always. These rooms never slept or closed down for the night.
I had been sober since Abby was taken, just in case I was on call for Tyson. But tonight I was drinking and I was going to drink hard. I could handle being hung over and looking after Tyson. For one day anyway.
I poured myself a drink, my fingers wrapping around the glass.
“
You shouldn’t be drinking.”
Out of all the people to be up at this time of night, of course it would be him. I glared down at my glass. I didn’t look up. I didn’t acknowledge him.
“Ignoring me, huh? Well, that’s new.”
I took a sip from my glass. God, it tasted good, so refreshing. I was about to take another sip when it was ripped from my hand, spilling all over the bar.
“TRIGGER!”
“You really think you should be getting off your face right now?” He held the glass in the air.
“I was having a drink! ONE!”
“You never stop at one. You and I both know that.” He was looking at me as if I was a disappointment. Well, he could think what he liked. I didn’t care. “You are the sole caretaker of a newborn, Kim, and you want to get off your face at three in the morning. I thought you were better than that.”
Did I need a lecture? No. Did I want one? No. Did I know I was doing the wrong thing? Yeah, maybe. But I couldn’t sleep and I needed sleep.
“Just give me the glass back.” I reached for it, but he was quicker.
“No.”
“Fine, I’ll get another one.” I got up off the stool, only to have his hand on my shoulder force me to sit back down.
“What’s wrong?”
“Why are you even up?” I glared at him. No one else was up. Reaper had made sure everyone was worn out today. He was riding them hard and wanted results. If anyone dared to even think about getting wasted, he was down their throats. He was planning an even bigger day tomorrow, which I guess was today now.
“Trigger?” a low female voice said.
I looked over his shoulder, noticing a half-dressed girl standing at the bottom of the staircase. Well, that answered my question. She barely looked to be in her twenties, maybe late teens.
I glared up at him. I was stupid to think he really cared. He was only up because he was getting laid. “You should go,” I said, and took the glass from his hand. “I’m fine.” Was I fine? No. I was so far away from fine it wasn’t funny. If anything, I was screwed up. Seriously.
I swore I saw regret in his face. But then if I admitted to seeing that, that would be admitting he had feelings. Which he didn’t. What was he waiting for? Why was he hanging around? I turned to look up at him.
