The Panty Whisperer: The Complete Series

by Sloane Howell

  "Well, umm Tommy. I could use a drink. Wanna go grab one?"

  "I'm Joel." The handsome asshole cuts in.

  "Yeah, that's great." I turn back to Tommy. "So how about that drink?" I wink at him. He shrugs at Joel.

  I can tell I'm getting to the beautiful, green-eyed asshole.

  "Why, I'd be delighted my lady." He offers his arm for me to take hold of. It's pretty cute, only because I can tell he's joking and rubbing it in Joel's face.

  I grab his arm and head off to the bar, leaving Joel with Brandi. I peek back and his jaw is damn near on the floor. I'm sure to shake my ass a little as I walk away, give him something to jerk off to later.

  Tommy and I get to the bar and he orders two scotches.

  "So, I don't think I got your name?" He leans on the bar top.

  "Oh, sorry. I'm Quinn."

  "Nice to meet you, Quinn."

  "Do you work out?" I start rubbing on his arm. It's pretty obvious what I'm doing, but guys are dumb. Joel is biting his lip at the table with Brandi, and continues to constantly glance over at us. I look back and Tommy is staring at me, but he's not checking me out. He appears confused.

  "What?" I ask.

  "Really? What the fuck is going on here?" He stares long and hard at me.

  Maybe he's more astute than I thought. I'm going to play dumb anyway. "What do you mean?"

  "Enough with the bullshit. You're a 12, and I'm an 8.5—most of the time." He cracks a smile. Must be an inside joke. "Joel over there—he's a 12. Something is going on and I want to know what it is. You trying to make him jealous?"

  This guy is sharp, and it makes him more attractive.

  "Okay, you got me. But—you're easily a 9.5." I grin.

  He still doesn't buy into my bullshit. "He did something to you, didn't he?"

  I look down at the floor without thinking. It's an obvious tell.

  "Your friend. He did something to one of your friends. You're getting back at him. Devilish fucking women, I swear. It's the redhead isn't it?" He smiles as if he knows he's correct.

  "Hey, don't be an asshole. And how could you possibly know that?"

  "Hah! I knew it. She's the only girl he's recently hooked up with in here. He's been working off-site." He starts laughing and my thoughts are a jumbled mess. I don't know whether to knock his ass out or laugh with him.

  "Well, you don't have to be a dickhead about it."

  Fuck, I've ruined the whole thing. Oh well, I have better shit to do anyway.

  "Don't make me wash your mouth out with soap, Quinn. You're better than that."

  I start laughing. This guy is a riot.

  "Look, if you want to get back at him, it's cool with me. His ass could use a reality check. But he better not find out that I know."

  I smile. "Deal."

  "Now go back to feeling my arm. That shit makes me feel strong and manly."

  I nearly shoot scotch out of my mouth. I like Tommy. I can tell he's a good friend.

  "So here's the deal—"

  "I don't even wanna know. I want to hear about it from him later. Just know he's a good guy. He just likes the ladies, a little too much sometimes."

  "He is one beautiful fucker, isn't he?" I gaze over at Joel, trying not to look interested.

  Tommy props up his chin on his hands, elbows on the bar top, looking like he has a schoolgirl crush. "Oh yes, he's just dreamy. McDreamy loverballs."

  "You should have your own TV show, seriously." I almost snort.

  "So what's up with Brandi? She's cute." He looks to the table.

  "She's super sweet, but I know someone who'd be better for you."

  "You don't understand. I'm in a drought. It's like the Great Depression in my pants. Fucking Dust Bowl status."

  I try to stifle my laughter. "Trust me, okay?"

  "Well thanks, and just so you know, Joel is relentless. He won't stop until he gets you."

  "I'm planning on it."

  We're over at the table, and I'm flirting with Tommy. He's playing along and I think it's making Brandi a little jealous.

  Joel keeps trying to get close to me, and I keep scooting away, pretending he's not even there. God, his fucking eyes though, and those lips, and that gorgeous smile. My panties are in a fucking knot, and they are not even close to being dry. I find myself being jealous of Livi. I wouldn't mind having him go to town on me under the table. It's been a while.

  Must remain strong.

  Finally, the unavoidable happens. Joel is standing next to me. I keep giving him one or two word answers to everything he asks. His face reddens each time. Fucker.

  "So, what do you do, Quinn?" His eyes are searing into me.

  "Marketing."

  "Oh yeah, anything specific?"

  "Not really."

  I can tell he's used to having girls gush over him.

  That's right, you handsome bastard. I'm going to leave your balls blue and aching.

  He reaches for his drink and rubs up against my hand, it's obviously on purpose. It sends a wave of nerves firing through my body. I'm flustered, but manage to play it cool and pull my hand away.

  "Sorry about that. It was an accident."

  No it fucking wasn't, you arrogant prick. Somehow the topic of sex comes up and Joel looks like he's in heaven. I stare at him and pretend to look disgusted, even though I'd like to take him somewhere private and fuck his brains out.

  They're all trading war stories. I can't take much more of hearing Joel. It's making me hot and simultaneously irritated. I find myself jealous of Olivia again. If only I'd gotten to him first, then I could have him. Now, I never will.

  Some time has passed and I've grown more comfortable around Joel. Perhaps a little too comfortable. I've had three scotches, and I'm starting to loosen up. I decide it's time to start the flirting. I have to make him think he's getting laid tonight.

  "I'm going to get another drink. Joel. You want to come? You look a little dry." I look to his rocks glass.

  "Absolutely."

  I throw Tommy a wink and he smiles.

  We walk up to the bar, and I start to order. Joel puts his hand on my lower back, trying to be nonchalant about it. It sends a shudder up through my shoulders. I hope he didn't feel it. I love the way he touches me.

  He leans over my shoulder, his words a whisper in my ear. "Can you grab me a Glenfiddich on the rocks?"

  He lingers, exhaling down my neck and my panties are officially ruined. This fucker. I think it's my turn to play.

  "Sure babe, you got it." I bend far over the bar to get the guy's attention. When I lean back I put my ass right in his crotch and rub it gently on his hard prick.

  I hear him grunt a little. My ass has that effect sometimes.

  "Oops, sorry about that."

  "Don't worry about it."

  "You should register that thing as a deadly weapon." I nod towards the bulge in his pants.

  "I could say the same about that ass of yours."

  I giggle a little. Jesus, stop acting like a girl. This guy is getting into my head, and that's not how this works.

  "You want to get out of here?" he asks.

  "What about Tommy?"

  "He's a big boy. He has a driver's license."

  "You'd just bail on your friend? Isn't that kind of shitty?" My hands ball up into fists.

  "Not to leave with you. He'd understand."

  What a prick. He's going to pay for that as well.

  "So you're going to give me a ride home?" The green eyes are getting to me.

  "Sure, I'll give you a ride."

  My eyebrows perk up, and I feign interest. What a cheesy line. You're better than that, Joel.

  "Ohh, a ride huh?"

  "Yes, ma'am."

  "What kind of ride?"

  "Just a ride to your house. I'll drive you home."

  Does this shit really work? I'm losing respect for every victim of his corny lines. "I think that sounds—fun. What kind of car do you drive?"

  His eyes light up
. "A '67 Fastback."

  My pussy kicks up a few degrees. Must recover.

  "That's a fast car. My ex-boyfriend had a '67. A Shelby GT 500."

  He stares down at the ground.

  What's wrong Joel? You jealous? Feeling inadequate now?

  My last boyfriend drove a Prius and was a tool bag, but he doesn't need to know that. You don't need to know that if it weren't for Olivia, I'd probably fuck your brains out. Ride you on the hood of that muscle car and making you scream my name over and over.

  "That's umm, a nice car. I love Shelby's."

  That's right, bitch.

  "Oh my god, I was so in love with his car. He was a surgeon at the children's hospital. We were actually engaged, so technically he was my fiancé."

  He keeps tugging at his collar. I'm laughing on the inside. I don't know if it's a good idea to have him give me a ride home though. His car is guaranteed to make me all hot and wanting, and then there is no telling what might happen.

  "Sounds like a great guy."

  "He was, but he decided to marry his job. He went to work in Africa. Doctors Without Borders was his calling. I couldn't stand in the way."

  Where do I come up with this shit? I can't believe he's still standing there. I've one-upped everything about him. I need to flirt a little more to balance it out.

  I grab his tie playfully. "I love this tie. It looks good on you."

  "Is that so?"

  "Yeah. I know something else that would look good on you."

  "What's that?" he asks.

  I lean in to his ear and whisper, "It's a secret."

  "Oh really?" He whispers back.

  "Mmhmm." I nod slowly and smile.

  I grab the two scotches that are sitting on the bar. "We better get back now."

  I brush my ass up against his perfect cock as I walk by. His eyes close and he sighs. I own your ass, Joel. He'll be jerking off for weeks. No amount of pussy will compare to the thought of having me, and he will not be having me.

  It's getting late, and I'm actually getting tired. Well, mentally tired. I could stay up and watch Joel squirm all night. It's obvious he's not used to this kind of treatment. Maybe if a woman told him no once in a while he wouldn't think he could fuck whomever he pleases. Cocky bastard.

  "Guys, I'm gonna have to get home and get to bed." I stand up from the booth.

  "I'll give you a ride. Tommy, you're good, right?" Joel winks at me.

  "Yeah boss, good to go," says Tommy.

  "Well, okay then. Brandi, I'll see you tomorrow?" I ask.

  "Yep, see you then."

  I walk by Tommy and whisper in his ear. "Do not hook up with her. I will find you a good girl, okay?"

  "You promise?" he asks.

  I love that guy. He's such a good friend. I'm sure Joel's probably a good friend to him as well, just an asshole when it comes to a girl's feelings.

  I look at Joel and smile.

  Ready for your balls to ache, big guy?

  We walk out to his car. When I see it I almost lose my shit right then and there. It is fucking beautiful. It should be illegal for a man as hot as him to drive such a gorgeous beast.

  I try not to look impressed, but it's difficult. He opens the door for me. It's actually kind of nice.

  I mean to say thank you, but all I can do is sit there and anticipate him firing up the engine.

  He turns the key, and she explodes under the hood. Rumbling energy rushes through the seats and through my body. I want to yank his pants off and fuck his brains out. I can't stop looking over at his dick and he knows it. God, the thought of it just a few feet away has me hotter than I've ever been in my life.

  I have to remind myself every two seconds to think of Livi. She would murder me if I fucked him. Seriously, she's pretty crazy. I might just wake up with a knife to my throat.

  "It's a rush, isn't it? Riding in this car?"

  "It's okay."

  His hands tighten on the steering wheel. It's not the reaction he was hoping for.

  "Where do you live?"

  "Fifth and Nashville."

  "Well, all right then."

  He hammers the gas and it forces my back against my seat. I'm so fucking aroused. I can see his eyes glancing occasionally to my tits. They get attention wherever I go, and the rumbling of all eight cylinders has them shaking non-stop, even with a bra.

  It's time to do a number on this guy, for Livi of course. I'm going to drive this fucker insane. I've had just enough booze to get dirty, and it'll help get rid of the urge to ride his cock all fucking night.

  "Your car makes me so fucking wet when we go fast."

  He swerves a little and I smile as he squirms in his seat.

  "Sorry, I can't fucking help myself. I'm so goddamn horny right now. It's been a while."

  I run my hands up to my tits and tweak my nipples, then moan as the vibrations of the car have my clit buzzing.

  I move another hand down my stomach slowly and he watches it disappear into my jeans. I have my eyes closed, secretly imagining him touching me, running his tongue along my thighs and up to my pussy.

  I start to rub on my clit, trying to imagine it's his fingers and forget that it's my own. I open my eyes wide and stare right at him. He's shifting in his seat and I imagine him fucking me. I remember every inch of his cock from rubbing my ass against it, and I think about taking it in and out of my mouth, and feeling it inside me.

  He reaches over for my left breast and I smack his hand away.

  "Just enjoy the show, you lucky bastard." I run my hand up my shirt and paw at my breasts over the top of my bra.

  "Is this why you wanted to get me alone in your car? To get me all fucking hot?"

  "Hell yes it is."

  I unbutton my pants and pull them to my knees along with my panties.

  I shove my hips up in the air and grind on my fingers, circling my clit, while he stares down at me. He swerves again and almost takes out a mailbox. I'm moaning loud as I imagine him shoving his cock into me over and over. I can feel the tension swirling down to my core. I can't believe I'm playing with myself in front of this guy. I've never done anything like this before.

  I start hammering my fingers in and out, and my wetness streams down my thighs to his seat.

  "Oh, fuck." I moan.

  He starts to say something and stutters. Apparently, he's never had a woman finger fuck herself in front of him. I thought this guy was some kind of master in the bedroom?

  He reaches over again, this time going for my pussy. I take my other hand out of my shirt and smack his hand away again.

  "Bad boy. Wait your fucking turn."

  I look over and see him pumping his hand on his cock over his pants. Watching him stroke his dick, knowing how bad he wants to fuck me, makes me want him even more. I look up and realize I'm going to have to get off soon. My house is coming up.

  "Oh shit, I'm about to come."

  I start circling my tight nub with my thumb and slide my fingers in and out of my pussy. I'm about to come all over the seat of this beautiful car and I don't care one bit.

  I pull my fingers out and slap my hand on my slit, before putting them back inside me, hammering myself even harder than before. I'm streaming all over his seat. He doesn't care one bit. He's too busy watching me finger bang myself right in front of his face.

  "Oh fuck, I'm coming Joel."

  I reach with my left arm and grab hold of his forearm as I convulse in his seat, my fingers as deep as they can possibly go. I pause as I squeeze myself around them and my legs straighten into the floorboard. An intense surge of tingling and heat radiates through my body and rips to my toes and fingertips. It is fucking intense, and I dig my nails into his arm so hard that I draw some blood.

  "Oh my god!" I squeal.

  I'm panting, trying to catch my breath.

  I finally wrap up as we pull down my street.

  "That's me right there," I say, panting uncontrollably.

  I point to my house and he pull
s up in front. He starts to lean over as if it's time for him to join in. I push him away and pull my panties and jeans over my hips and button them back up. I give him a quick pat on the cheek and then stare down at the blood on his arm. He looks like a confused little boy who just had his favorite toy taken away.

  "Thanks for the ride. I had a great time."

  I hop out of the car and start to walk inside. He sits there, awestruck. Wow, I don't think I've ever had an orgasm like that. He is one beautiful bastard. I'm sad that I'll never get to fuck him. Actually, I'm not sure if I could handle it or not. I could barely contain myself getting off in front of him.

  I turn around and stare at him through the open window.

  "Oh, by the way, Olivia says to go fuck yourself. Prick!"

  I shoot him the finger and walk to the house, shaking my ass as I head up the steps, then look back to see his mouth gaping in disbelief.

  I walk inside and wait by the door, imagining him sitting there, wondering what the fuck just happened.

  He hammers the gas and drives away, making me hot all over again. I can see why they call him the panty whisperer, but he's not getting in these panties. Ever!

  JOEL

  "SWEET MOTHER OF Leia's tits! Have you looked in a mirror?" Tommy navigates his way through various foam restaurant containers, cutting through the smell of rotting takeout and shame. "Oh, goddamn. This is worse than I thought. It smells like Honey Boo Boo's mom shit up your living room, bro."

  I snarl at him. "What?"

  I set down my Xbox controller and sigh, shooting a blank stare in his direction.

  "Jesus, look at your stomach. It looks like the quarter pounders have been kind to you." He starts to chuckle as he gazes in disbelief.

  "What the hell is so funny?" My blank stare turns into a glare.

  "Nothing." He shakes his head.

  "No, you opened your mouth. Say what you have to say."

  "Oh, you know, just thinking about all the Panty Whisperer victims, looking just like this for weeks after a taste of ol' Herbert."

  "I've never made anyone feel like this." I pause for a moment. "I'm doing fucking great by the way. I'm just taking some time off from work and relaxing. I work hard. I'm allowed to take some vacation time and fuck off."