January Dreams

by Carrigan Richards

  “Do you want to do something tomorrow night?” Vincent asks.

  “No dice. I have to work.”

  “Do you always work?”

  I let out a small laugh. “Yeah. Sorry. You can thank my parents for that.”

  “How late do you work?”

  “Midnight.”

  “Ouch. Well, maybe this will give you something to think about.” He takes a step closer and his lips touch mine. His hands entangle through my hair and he presses harder. My heart is frantic, and I love the softness of his lips. Suddenly, in my mind I see a man in a black pinstripe suit smiling at a woman in a long navy dress. Their faces are blurry though. Vincent abruptly pulls away.

  “I’m sorry,” he says breathlessly. “A little eager.” Blood rushes to his cheeks under the porch light and he looks away.

  “It’s okay.” I wonder who on earth I saw in my mind or what I was thinking.

  He brushes my hair from my face and pulls me closer with his hand cupping my neck and tilting my head toward his. He kisses me again, softly, and I see the man in the suit kiss the woman in a navy dress with raven hair. Vincent draws me closer against him and my pulse quickens. Once his lips are on mine, there is desire and passion and hunger. The immense feelings jolt me. He pulls away and searches my eyes. I’m so wound up from the intense kiss that I think my knees are actually weak.

  “I gotta go,” he says, winded. “But I’ll call you.” He clumsily walks toward his car. He doesn’t look back, but something has him rattled. Like he’s scared. Is he embarrassed by how passionate that kiss was?

  Thanks for making me incredibly insecure, I want to tell him. But before I can say anything, he’s already in his car and speeds away like he has a plane to catch.

  My heart sinks. I don’t know what I did. Either I’m that good of a kisser that it made him so awkward and nervous or he’s suddenly afraid of me. Or maybe I can’t kiss at all.

  What was I thinking about when Vincent kissed me? It was more of a vision or something. Am I hallucinating now? Dreaming of one boy while seeing things when I kiss another? Great. So now, I enter the world of absolute craziness.

  Chapter Nine

  As I hold Casper, waiting and hoping for him to wake from the gunshot wound, I’m reminded of when we first met. We spent every single day with each other. We took walks in the rose garden. Lie in the lazy wheat field. Or under a cover of trees that gave us our own private space. Danced with each other at the balls. We talked endlessly and I could not get enough of this strange man. I had always known Vincent, so maybe this attraction was because Casper was new and exciting. But it felt stronger than that.

  Days turned to weeks, and I fell in love with him. I was with another man, and while it was so wrong, my feelings for Casper were stronger than anything I had ever felt. We gazed at each other and I placed my hands on his chest. He reached up and tucked a few strands of hair behind my ear and I felt his fingertips trace along my shoulder, sending the hair at the nape to stand on end. I slid my hands up and around his neck, running my hands through his soft hair.

  Casper leaned down ever so slightly, and our foreheads touched. Briefly, our lips touched sending a current to my heart. He nibbled on my bottom lip and drew me closer in, his mouth locked onto mine. I couldn’t tell if it was the summer heat filling me or if it was from his kiss. I had never felt such passion and I knew I could never say goodbye to him. I wanted him forever. And I would do anything to make it happen.

  Casper abruptly pulled away, breathless. “Megan, we can’t—this can’t happen.” His voice was low but hearing the ache in his voice I knew he didn’t want it to be true.

  “I would end it with Vincent. For you,” I whispered.

  He sighed. “Once I fall for someone, I’m in it for life.”

  At his words, I froze. I realized what he’d been trying to tell me all along. Why it would torture him for the rest of his existence. Why we shouldn’t have even been talking to each other. It had nothing to do with my being with someone else. He wasn’t a Fairy Sprite.

  He was an Elf. My enemy.

  I didn’t run from him that night. Instead, I promised him I would help find the Jewel, a mysterious Jewel to keep his kind alive. For days and weeks, we searched and came up empty. I told Florence about Casper and myself. I convinced him to run away with me. It was the only way we could be together. And now I’m not sure what I’ve done.

  Casper’s eyes flutter open, and relief washes over me. I kiss him. “He can’t keep doing this to us. We have to end this.”

  “We will. We will survive this.”

  Cherry and I made lunch plans before work. Hopefully, lunch and work will keep my mind off Casper and the dreams and not make me fret about Vincent’s weird reaction last night. I’m tired of waking up and feeling an urge to see Casper. To be in his arms. To feel his lips on mine.

  Ugh. Why does it have to be Casper? Can’t I dream about Vincent?

  “Hey,” Cherry says with a wide smile as we enter the café near the mall. It’s packed, but for once it’s nice to be one of the kids out enjoying their day. These days are rare for me.

  Once we’re seated at a table and the waitress takes our drink order, Cherry stares at me, wide-eyed, eager for details like a Labrador waiting for a treat or something.

  “We have any dreams last night?” She waggles her eyebrows and nudges me.

  I swallow hard. “Of Casper?”

  She recoils. “No, Vincent. Tell me what happened.” She props her elbows on the table.

  “We went out.”

  “And,” she presses.

  “Then he took me home.”

  Cherry’s smile immediately fades. “What happened? You don’t seem as happy as I expected. Was he a jerk?”

  The waitress returns with our drinks and we order sandwiches and fries.

  “No. We had an amazing time, and he kissed me.” Cherry squeals at this. “But then he left in a hurry. Just left. I don’t know what I did.”

  “What? Was it a good kiss?”

  “I thought so. But what if it’s me? What if I’m a terrible kisser?”

  Cherry presses her lips together and thinks for a moment. “I don’t think he’d flee like that if you were a bad kisser. What happened the rest of the night? Was there something that happened that made him run like that?”

  I hesitate, not wanting to tell her. “Casper.”

  She looks at me confused. “What?”

  I tell her what happened, and she laughs.

  “You threw your coke on him? That is priceless.”

  “He keeps messing with me. Vincent saw us talking. But if that really bothered him, why would he kiss me in the first place?”

  “Hmm, true.”

  Maybe he had to check on his mom. But even that doesn’t seem right because his phone never went off. “I don’t know.”

  “He’s a very shy guy. I wouldn’t worry. Maybe send him a text telling him what a great time you had.”

  “Maybe. Oh, you’ll be happy to know I’ve started writing.”

  “Yay!” She smiles. “I wanna hear all about it.”

  “It’s about a couple running from the bad guys in search of a Jewel that will save their lives.”

  “I can’t wait to read it.” Cherry smiles and the waitress brings our food. I’m starving, but my stomach is still wound up from last night and everything else.

  “Luke works tonight.”

  “You gonna ask him out?”

  “I thought you were gonna drop hints?” She gives me a puppy-dog look.

  I roll my eyes. “Wimp.”

  “It should be the guy’s job anyway.”

  “I’ll tell him you said that.”

  “Yes. Wait-no. Don’t say that. He’ll think I’m demanding.”

  “You are a little.”

  “But he doesn’t have to know that.”

  “He will if you two start dating.”

  “Not in the beginning. You gotta release small bits of crazy at a ti
me.” She smiles innocently.

  I laugh, shaking my head.

  Afterward, we head to work where we count our tills, still trying to come up with a good enough reason why Vincent left. But neither one of us do.

  We finish counting our tills and walk out of the office. I hear something hard and plastic crash to the floor and coins scatter. I look behind me and Cherry stands mortified that she had bumped into Luke, sending her entire till and its contents across the floor.

  Luke smiles which shows his dimples on his slightly chubby cheeks. He is thin and attractive in that cute-boyish way. I like my men to be a little manlier, but I think about Vincent. He kinda has both looks going for him. Cherry talks endlessly about Luke’s green eyes and how much she wants to run her hands through his thick brown hair. Any time he looks at her, she tells me about it. Which is a lot, apparently. He goes to a different school, so she only sees him at work, but that doesn’t stop her from switching shifts to work with him all the time.

  We help her pick up her money and he smiles widely at her. “I’ll see you down there.”

  Her face turns so red. It’s cute.

  Working Saturday nights suck. I’m at work and all these other kids are out with their friends or boyfriends and girlfriends. They never have to work because their parents pay for everything. And they all have to come into Bailey’s for gum or a Coke before walking around the strip mall. I finish bagging this lady’s groceries and turn to greet my next customer with a smile, but it turns into an annoyed frown. Casper stands with a bunch of gum and drinks. His friends wait for him by the door.

  “Hi,” I say, only because I’m required to greet customers. I scan his items without meeting his eyes.

  “Not gonna dump the coke on me, are you?”

  I sigh.

  “I didn’t know you worked here.”

  “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.” I feel his heated gaze on me, and I try so hard not to look up. “Twenty-four ten,” I say, meeting his eyes.

  “How was your date last night?” he asks, and I suspect a hint of jealousy.

  “None of your business.”

  He hands me money and I take it without touching him. I give him the change and receipt.

  “Will you call me tonight?”

  “Nope. You’d better go before they start making fun of you for talking to me.”

  “I don’t care what they think. Please call me.”

  “Sorry. I didn’t need your number, so I threw it away.” That isn’t true. I haven’t gotten around to throwing it away.

  He seems hurt, which makes me feel guilty. “Why are you being like this?”

  “Why are you being like this? I don’t like you.”

  “Sorry I bothered you,” he snaps and walks away.

  I exhale, but I feel bad. I don’t like being mean to people. But does he really expect me to be like all the other girls and fawn all over him?

  “What’s his problem?” Luke asks from behind me as he mops the aisle.

  “He’s a jerk,” I say.

  “Yeah, sounded like it. Reminds me of some of the guys at my school.”

  “Reminds me of all guys.”

  “I resent that,” he teases.

  “Sorry. Most guys. Anyway, when are you going to ask Cherry out?”

  “What?” His eyes widen and he stops mopping.

  “You heard me.” I’m not being subtle at all and I’m sure Cherry would kick me if she heard me, but I don’t want it to drag out since she’s putting me in the middle. Of course, I could have said no, but I want Cherry to be happy.

  He sighs. “Does she even like me? Sometimes I wonder.”

  I laugh. “Are you kidding me? I think you need a lesson in what it means when a girl acts like this.”

  “She doesn’t really talk to me.”

  “She’s shy. Around you.”

  “Oh. I wasn’t sure. Sometimes she seems mad at me.”

  “Yeah, she’s masking her feelings.”

  “Oh. She really likes me?”

  I roll my eyes and nod. “Yeah. You should ask her out tonight.”

  He smirks and continues mopping past me.

  Our shift finally ends and the three of us walk out together, but I tell them goodnight and leave them. I see a piece of paper under my wiper on my windshield. I yank it out and read it:

  I’m sorry, but please call me. We need to talk. Casper. He left his number again. I sigh, wad the paper up, and toss it in the backseat. Can’t he get a clue? I slam my door shut and run my fingers through my hair. What is wrong with me? I repel the nice guys and yet attract the jerks.

  I won’t call Casper and Vincent never called or texted me which worries me. Whatever happened, he doesn’t seem to like me as much as I thought. This is another reason I hate having my parents meet my date before we go out. Because now they will constantly ask about him and wonder what happened to him.

  Dejected, I drive home, and when Savannah sees me, she frantically runs around in excitement. Hopping on her hind legs, she begs me like a child to be picked up. I toss my purse and keys on my bed, and pick her up, wherein she licks my face dry and gets her black and white hair all over my shirt. But I don’t mind. I love the little goober. And she makes me feel better. I set her down on the ground, round up my pajamas and head for the shower, in which she follows.

  She patiently waits for me on the rug in front of the bathtub until I finish my shower. Our nightly ritual. I climb into the bed, and she burrows under the covers, until she’s comfortable. Which can take anywhere from five seconds to five minutes with her turning around in circles, moving the blanket, and burrowing some more. Crazy dog.

  Same as always. I really need a life. And not the messed up weird, crazy life that my dreams are.

  Why am I even still thinking about these stupid dreams? Because they feel so real? Because Casper is in them and it’s like a little fantasy?

  I shake my head. There is no way that Casper is remotely a fantasy. But I’m still left with a cruel desire deep down like I’m missing something in my life, but I don’t understand how I can when I don’t even know what it is.

  I dread falling asleep, so instead, I take out my notebook and write. So much comes to my mind. If anything, it will ease the stress. I hope.

  Chapter Ten

  After running through the forest with Casper, I dress for school. Is that the only time a boy is ever going to like me? In my dreams? I shake my head. I shouldn’t be so focused on boys anyway. I should focus on school so I can get out of here.

  When I arrive at school, I close my car door on my backpack strap which spills out my books. Anger fills me, and I just want to sleep. Without dreams. I want to know what happened to Vincent and why I deter him so much. I want Casper to leave me alone with his stupid pranks.

  Just as I pick up my last book and free the strap from my car door, I start walking toward the school, but stop when Vincent approaches me.

  Rolling my eyes, I walk around him. He didn’t have the decency to tell me he doesn’t like me in private. Has to wait until we’re at school so he can make me cry.

  “Megan—”

  I spin around. “You never called. If you don’t like me, at least tell me. I mean, what was that Friday night? I thought we hit it off, I mean, you kissed me. And ran.”

  “Something happened. I didn’t know what to do. I freaked out.”

  “Wow. I never heard that excuse before. But thanks for helping my self-esteem.”

  “Come on, Megan. What do you expect me to say when something like that happens?”

  Has he never kissed a girl before? “We kissed. What’s the big deal?”

  “It was more than that. It was intense.”

  “Yeah, it was. Does that scare you?”

  “A little. I don’t know how to explain it. I just…I saw something.”

  That brings me up short. “What?”

  He drags his hands down his face. “When we kissed, I saw us, I guess. Like we’ve known
each other forever.”

  What is seriously going on? I’m dreaming about one guy and sharing visions with another? What am I? A freak? Am I a witch?

  “I knew you wouldn’t understand.” Vincent shakes his head and starts to walk away.

  “No, wait,” I call out. “I-I saw it, too.”

  He stops abruptly and turns around. “What?”

  “I saw it, too. When you kissed me, I saw two people kissing. Like they’d been in love.”

  His eyes widen. “What does this mean?”

  “I don’t know.” And I’m not sure I want to know. I think I’m seriously going to have a panic attack. Whatever happened to normal teenage life? You know, boy meets girl, they like each other, they date, they have a great time. Maybe I need to see a shrink. If I’m seeing these things, and Casper and Vincent are seeing these things, I’m obviously the common thread. Does this happen with every guy I encounter? I briefly think about pulling the next guy that passes by and kissing him to see what happens.

  “Can I try something?” Vincent asks.

  “What?”

  He closes the distance between us, and my breath hitches. He reaches his hand around the nape of my neck, pulling my mouth to his. His soft lips brush mine. My heart rattles against my chest as my knees wobble. If anyone is watching, I don’t care. As his lips dance with mine, the kiss awakens something inside me that I never knew existed. Except when I kiss Casper in my dreams.

  Vincent slowly pulls away, resting his forehead on mine. We stand there, catching our breath. “I’ve never felt anything like that,” he breathes.

  “Me neither.” Unless the kisses in my dreams count. Ugh. Why am I thinking of Casper?

  “I didn’t see anything, did you?”

  “No.”

  “That’s very bizarre.”

  “What could it mean?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Do you forgive me for not calling?” he asks, his eyes filled with sadness. “I was freaked out and I spent the weekend at the hospital with my mom. I’m sorry. I should’ve called.”